Daisy's friend Rudyard Kipling was born in Bombay (now Mumbai) and often wrote about India in his short stories and books. His most famous work is The Jungle Book; which was published in 1894 and is considered a children's classic today. Author's collection/Alfred Howes
After the lease expired on their lodge in Lude, Billow rented a new place, Meallmore Lodge in rugged Invernesshire in the heart of the Scottish Highlands, where he hoped he and his friends would have challenging hunting experiences. Seeking adventure had become almost an addiction for him. Daisy had loved going to Lude, and now she looked forward to staying at Meallmore Lodge with her guests.
Billow preferred to hunt in remote countries with just his male friends, so he and Daisy took only one extended international trip together, to Egypt in the late 1880s. In 1895, Daisy took a bold step. This time, it was she who left Billow behind when she departed for Egypt with Mabel. The Gordon sisters were immediately popular with the British officers they met there, after being introduced around by two brothers-in-law of Daisy's longtime friend Abby Lippitt Hunter, whom she knew from the Charbs. They dined with officers every night and toured a remote and dangerous military post at Wadi Halfa in the Nubian Desert. They were the only women there.
They sailed up the Nile, possibly on a dahabeah, a luxurious bargelike vessel with sails that was originally used by Egyptian kings and queens. Mabel and Daisy were also onboard the first boat to ever go over the First Cataract (a series of rapids and small waterfalls at the site of the present-day Aswan Dam), which must have been a thrill. Daisy formed lifelong friendships with several high-ranking British officers during this Egyptian trip, and she was reminded that there were men who lived quite differently from Billow and his social group.
When she returned to England, she found that her relationship with Billow was still strained. Finally, she turned to Mabel and Arthur for advice and support. Daisy wrote Arthur that Billow was "like Scotch weather, when he is bad he is awful, but when really nice, sweeter than summer."
CHAPTER NINE
Wars
DAISY'S PARENTS made plans to come to England in the spring of 1898, but suddenly, war between the United States and Spain loomed. The conflict was mainly over the independence of the small island of Cuba, which Spain had colonized but the United States wanted to liberate. The impending war was based on the Monroe Doctrine, a declaration put forth by President James Monroe in 1823 that the United States would not tolerate a European nation colonizing an independent country in North or South America.
Daisy fretted. What if her father and brothers became involved? She wrote to Arthur, "I think it is all wrong. I am miserable about it!"
On February 15, the battleship USS Maine exploded and sank in Havana Harbor, Cuba. Two hundred and sixty-six Americans died. President William McKinley demanded that Spain withdraw its forces from the island, but Spain decided to stay and fight. And so the Spanish-American War began in April 1898.
Willie Gordon immediately offered his services to the federal government. The president accepted and made him the brigadier-general representing Georgia. Papa headed to Miami, Florida, to take over his command, the Second Brigade, First Division, Seventh Army Corps. Before long, Bill and Arthur joined him as commissioned officers.
In late January 1898, President McKinley sent the USS Maine to patrol the waters near Havana and protect U.S. citizens there. Library of Congress
The exact cause of the USS Maine explosion was never determined, but the incident inflamed the volatile political situation between Spain and the United States and led to the start of the Spanish-American War. "Remember the Maine!" became an American rallying cry. Library of Congress
Nellie Gordon followed her husband to Florida too. She visited the troops stationed in the army hospital there and found that thousands of men were ill from drinking polluted water, because at that time Miami was little more than a swamp. The soldiers also didn't have enough food, medicine, blankets, or clean sheets. The conditions were a "positive disgrace," Mamma wrote, and she intended to do something about it.
Daisy loved England, but she considered herself an American first and foremost. As soon as she could, she sailed home to assist her mother, and she arrived in hot and humid Florida that summer.
Many former Confederate soldiers, such as Willie Gordon, volunteered to support their country during the Spanish-American War. Their efforts helped heal some of the remaining rifts between the North and the South. This photograph of Papa was taken while he was training in Savannah before departing for Miami. Girl Scouts of the USA-JGLB
At first, there wasn't even a kitchen at the hospital, which was made up of a collection of tents. Daisy heated soup on a kerosene stove in the bathroom of her hotel and hauled the hot liquid to the patients. She and her mother made beds, tried to cheer up the sick soldiers, and helped in any way they could.
The conditions in Miami were quite a contrast for Daisy. Just before sailing for America, she had entertained the Prince of Wales, Lady Randolph Churchill, and other dignitaries at a luncheon at Wellesbourne. Planning the event had been stressful—the menu had to be preapproved by the future king of England, and every aspect of the afternoon needed to be flawlessly executed. One guest arrived early with a roll of red carpet tucked under her arm so the prince could walk on it from his carriage to the house. Daisy was forever grateful to that guest for knowing about this all-important detail of royal etiquette. After everyone had arrived, Daisy relaxed and stepped into one of her favorites roles, enjoying her little party "to her very finger tips." She was especially pleased that Billow was extremely happy that day.
Now Daisy and her mother were busy feeding hard-working soldiers. Finding local eggs, fresh fruit, and vegetables was a constant challenge. One afternoon, after the hospital ran out of milk, Daisy wandered up and down the streets of Miami until she found a cow. Daisy milked the cow, paid for the milk, and carried the brimming bucket back to the hospital tents herself. Mamma wrote proudly, "Daisy is working like a brick."
The Spanish-American War lasted only four months, and no one in the Gordon family actually went into battle. Most of the brief but intense fighting occurred in the Caribbean near Cuba or off the coast of the Philippine Islands, another Spanish colonial possession in the Pacific Ocean. Two major naval battles and several smaller ones destroyed Spain's navy and isolated its troops stationed on the islands. They surrendered to U.S. military forces in August 1898. The war marked a new, dynamic period in the U.S. Navy's history, as well as the rise of the United States as a global military power.
Long before the Treaty of Peace between Spain and the United States was signed in Paris on December 10, 1898, the Gordon family gathered in Savannah for Mabel's wedding to Rowland Leigh, the youngest son of an English nobleman and a relative of Jane Austen's. Rowland's family's ancestral home, Stoneleigh Abbey, was a few miles away from Wellesbourne, on the River Afton, and Mabel had met him while visiting Daisy. The wedding was on October 31, Daisy's thirty-eighth birthday. Rowland had waited nine years for Mabel's father to agree that they could marry. Willie's continuing distrust of Billow made him hesitant to give away another daughter to an Englishman.
Sick soldiers lay on cots in a temporary hospital at Camp Miami, where Mamma, Daisy, and others helped nurse them. State Archives of Florida
After the wedding, Willie and Nellie Gordon, accompanied by the newlyweds, traveled to Washington, D.C. President McKinley greeted them all at the White House and thanked both Gordons for their service to their country.
Daisy returned to England and to her rocky marriage of nearly twelve years. By then, she felt as though she had married a sulking schoolboy who would not grow up. The previous year, Daisy had written to Arthur that when Billow was "annoyed at something, he forgets exactly what it is, but he means to give me a real dressing down."
Daisy had envisioned having the same kind of loving relationship with Billow that her parents enjoyed in their marriage. She wished she could be as strong as her mother,
who somehow "managed" Papa without him knowing it. Instead, Billow was in control, and sometimes he taunted Daisy cruelly. Before setting out to meet the Prince of Wales and other friends, he might hint that he would be riding in a dangerous steeplechase horserace. Daisy would not be able to hear most of the details, even with her ear trumpet. Then, while he was away, she would work herself up into a frenzy of worry.
Still, she loved Billow with all her heart, and some friends and family members, Mabel included, felt that he took full advantage of this. He knew that Daisy would always be waiting for him to come home, no matter how long he was away or what he was doing.
Daisy was increasingly lonely. "I see so little of Billow," she wrote Arthur in the summer of 1899, "[that] I feel there is no human affection for me except in the family."
When Nellie and Willie Gordon visited again in 1900, Billow was attentive to them, as always, and Daisy attempted to keep her emotions and problems to herself. But Mamma sensed the rift and began to speak protectively of Daisy as "our Daisy" or "our little Daisy" in letters and in her travel diary.
On January 22, 1901, Queen Victoria died, and Billow's friend Prince Albert Edward became the king of England. Then, Nell's son Wayne fell from a window and died too. Daisy wrote her sister a long letter, saying, "Happiness is not the sum total of life. One's own individual life is such a small part of the working of the big world.... [There are] myriad little insects that die to make a coral reef and yet they have their uses and have not lived in vain."
Daisy was alone much of the time that spring. Her marriage all but ended when she learned that Billow had a mistress, a beautiful widow named Anna Bateman. Billow was infatuated with Mrs. Bateman, and by May 1901 they were openly attending parties as a couple and staying in London hotels together. Soon, he moved her into Meallmore Lodge, where he and Daisy lived part of the time, and sent his wife to another wing of their home. Mrs. Bateman even began to order the staff around in Daisy's presence. Instead of behaving like her usual spunky self, Daisy was crushed. She sent for her sister Mabel, who came at once, along with Billow's sister Katy Low.
They left Meallmore for Wellesbourne House so Daisy could pack and return to Savannah. She finally was forced to admit to her parents that her marriage was in shambles. Nellie and Willie Gordon were dismayed for their beloved Daisy but not totally surprised.
By June 1902, Billow had ended the lease on their Scottish lodge and closed Wellesbourne House. Daisy no longer had a home in England or any money.
English friends wrote to tell Daisy that Billow, still living in London, continued to flaunt his relationship with Mrs. Bateman. But Daisy did not want a divorce. She believed that she and Billow had married for life. Plus, she was determined to shield her family from embarrassment. Getting a divorce was scandalous in high society in the early 1900s, and when it did happen, the wife often bore the brunt of the gossip and disgrace.
She told Billow's sisters Katy and Amy that she still loved them, even if they sided with their brother. Katy wrote and said, "How could anyone possibly blame you, dearest Daisy?" His other sisters were equally supportive. Katy Low believed that her brother was drinking himself to death and was not in his right mind.
Daisy decided to return to England to try to deal with the situation. She wasn't sure how she would be received. But to Daisy's surprise, most of their friends supported her, not Billow. Her parents gave her an allowance, but sometimes she ran out of money and was forced to stay with friends.
Finally, Daisy was able to rent a house on Grosvenor Square in London. It was a tumultuous and awkward period in her life. As her brother Arthur noted, his sister was "neither maid, wife, or widow."
Once, Billow stopped by to ask Daisy for a divorce. He was unshaven. His clothes were disheveled and dirty. It was clear that he was terribly ill. A distressed Daisy agreed, but only if Billow would stop drinking and seek medical help. In a letter to Papa, she argued, "Divorce [is] wrong, but it is the lesser of two evils."
The British court system moved slowly forward with the divorce. It was a male-dominated world then, and Daisy relied on her English attorney, Sir George Lewis, and her father to deal with all the legal issues.
Then, in June 1905, Billow Low died. The news saddened Daisy, even though his death was not entirely unexpected. Accompanied by Nell and Mabel, she attended his funeral, which had been arranged by Anna Bateman. She felt she had to go, "for the sake of those years long ago when I loved him."
Daisy had been married nearly nineteen years, and for much of that time, she had lived in Great Britain. Yet when William Low's will was read following the funeral service, it was revealed that he had left almost everything to Mrs. Bateman. Even two of his own sisters, Mary and Jessie, received nothing. Daisy knew this was wrong, and she vowed to have her attorney fight it.
Finally, by November 1906, she was able to write, "All my money bothers are now at an end." Her lawyer had gotten Mary and Jessie a settlement, and Daisy inherited cash, investments, and all of Billow's American possessions, including their home in Savannah. She had cleared the Gordon name. Daisy thanked everyone who had "held out kind hands during the dark years that I now hope are over forever."
She was forty-six years old, and she did not know what she wanted to do with her remaining years. She still traveled regularly and enjoyed parties. Wherever she was—Savannah, New York, London, Scotland, or even in a rented villa—Daisy continually opened her door and her heart to her friends and family.
Peggy Graves, Mabel's daughter, would later reminisce about how her Aunt Daisy would call to say, "Hello Peggy, I have just arrived back—come right over and see me as soon as you can." Daisy's other nieces and nephews also received surprise phone calls and sudden visits from their aunt. They recalled that she smelled of English lavender and French soap and that her trunks were filled with exotic gifts from faraway places. They all expected Aunt Daisy to continue to organize lots of zany and unusual picnics and parties. And she did.
Daisy purchased the house she had been renting at 40 Grosvenor Square in London, as well as the house next door, number 39. Her plan was to live in one house and rent out the other. She loved Savannah, but London offered the theater, opera, and a richer social life. She could shop around the corner on new Bond Street or stroll through Hyde Park. Daisy wanted to put her troubled years behind her, and she seemed to sparkle and laugh more than ever.
Daisy frequented the West End of London, where several theaters were located and the streets bustled with activity. This scene shows Piccadilly Circus and Coventry Street around the time Daisy moved to Grosvenor Square. Library of Congress
In central Scotland, she leased a lodge called Lochs in the beautiful valley of Glen Lyon. Daisy especially enjoyed her winter stays there, when snow skimmed the ground. Meggernie Castle, with its towers and window slits in the thick stone walls, loomed nearby. Several ghosts supposedly floated about the halls and rooms at Meggernie, including the spirit of a woman who was murdered—cut in two by her husband. Daisy remained a great storyteller, and she loved to repeat these ghost stories to her visitors at Lochs and to many others who later came into her life.
December 21, 1907, was a bittersweet day. Daisy's parents celebrated their fiftieth wedding anniversary with an elegant party in Savannah. Daisy, Nell, Bill, Mabel, and Arthur wanted it to be a joyous and special event to honor their parents. Daisy dressed in a pale pink gown of old lace covered with coral beads and wore the same diamonds she'd had on when she was presented at the British royal court. Congratulatory gifts and cards flowed in from around the world.
December 21 would have also been Daisy's twenty-first wedding anniversary, as she knew all too well. Late that evening, after the guests left, she grew ill. Despite her frequent travels and busy calendar, unhappiness often swept over her like a fast-moving rain cloud. Being surrounded by her mother, sisters, aunts, female cousins, sisters-in-law, and all their children reminded her even more of her failed and childless marriage. Arthur observed that she "b
rooded over the fact that she was not essential to anyone."
Yet the morning after the anniversary celebrations, Daisy rose early. She had plans to leave for a trip to India with a school friend, Mary Gale Carter, and one of her nieces, Beth Parker. Her trunks were packed, and off she went.
CHAPTER TEN
A Life-Changing Luncheon
DURING HER TRIP to Egypt with Mabel, Daisy had befriended a group of British military officers, and some of these men were now stationed in India. They provided the three ladies with a servant during their travels around the country and made sure they were safely escorted from place to place. Daisy even visited the Khyber Pass, an important trade route that links Pakistan and Afghanistan in the Hindu Kush mountain range. Her friend Rudyard Kipling had set his 1888 novel, The Man Who Would Be King, in this region of steep mountains and narrow river valleys, and she wanted to see for herself the many tribes and cultures there.
It was an exhilarating trip. But while Daisy and her traveling companions were in India, they came down with the chicken pox and had to be quarantined. It was a serious and highly contagious disease. Luckily, the British officers stepped in and cared for them until they recovered. Daisy wrote home, "My own father and brothers cannot have done more, when I was ill, than these officers!"
Once she had recovered, Daisy took a steamer ship to England and returned to her home on Grosvenor Square. A stack of bills must have awaited her, for she was convinced that she was bankrupt. She huddled in bed with her checkbook, trying to figure out her finances. Bills always confused her, and she had a reputation for quarreling with shop owners and tradespeople, sure that she didn't owe them any money when she truly did.
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