by Susanna Carr
She groaned. “That’s the middle of the night for me.”
That was true, Cole thought as he bit back a smile. As a personal trainer, Angie had to get up before dawn to meet with her clients. She had always apologized for her early hours, but he didn’t mind. He wasn’t looking for nights in dance clubs and bars when he could be alone with her.
“Is this about your case?” she asked. “The wedding is in three days and then everybody goes home. I don’t think there’s much more you can do.”
He could lie and say he was here for the case. But he had used his assignment as an excuse to get closer. He wasn’t going to hide behind his job. He had been too private and guarded in the past. It protected him but not Angie. She believed in what other people said. He won’t let that happen again.
“I made a mistake.”
Angie frowned. “About Heidi’s accident?”
“No, I meant about us.” He took a deep breath. “I made a mistake breaking up with you. It’s my biggest regret.”
She looked down at her bare feet. “What brought this on?”
“You think I’m overplaying the role as your on-again boyfriend. You’re right.” His words were choppy. He wished he could be a smooth talker but it was difficult getting his feelings across. “Being together reminds me what I’ve lost. I miss being with you.”
Angie’s eyes narrowed and her mouth tightened. “You knew what you were giving up when you walked away.”
He should have known he wouldn’t get any sympathy from her. “You suggested we move in together and I panicked.” It wasn’t the whole truth. There was so much more to it but he didn’t feel safe in revealing it all.
“That’s why? Seriously?” She stood straight and grasped the door handle, ready to slam it in his face. “I mentioned it once. It’s not like I tried to give you a hard sell.”
“I felt that if we lived together, you would see the sides of me that aren’t so—” he gritted his teeth and pushed the word out “—loveable. You wouldn’t like what you saw.”
“I never thought you were perfect.”
“You would have grown to hate me.” Like his family did. He had gotten in the way of what they always wanted. “I thought it was best to end things so you had a chance to find someone better. Someone you could really love.”
Angie slowly shook her head. “You shouldn’t have done that.”
Cole nervously rubbed the back of his neck. “I know that now. I wish I’d never made that mistake and been the boyfriend you needed.”
“You were the boyfriend I wanted but your attitude changed in that last month.” Her voice carried a hint of the confusion and hurt from that time. “I had loved you, Cole. Didn’t you see that?”
He was stunned. His heart stopped and his ears started to buzz. The room kind of slanted as his whole world went off balance. “You loved me?”
Angie blushed but she held his gaze. “Why are you so surprised? I wouldn’t have talked about moving in otherwise.”
She loved him. She had never said those words before. All he wanted was Angie’s love but he didn’t think he had it. He had left because he didn’t think he could earn her love. Now he realized he had thrown it away.
The regret and loss weighed heavily on him. He felt like he needed to hold on to something before he slid down to the ground. He wanted to lean against Angie and hold on to her until his world righted itself.
She had loved him. Once. How did she feel about him now? No, he didn’t want to ask that question. What if she couldn’t love him again? What if he couldn’t get her back?
He’d take whatever she was willing to give as long as she didn’t shut him out. Cole took a step closer. “Invite me in,” he said in a husky voice.
Angie swallowed roughly. “That’s not a good idea.”
“It’s a very good idea. I’ve been thinking about it and so have you.” When she didn’t deny it, he boldly took a step closer. “I can’t stop thinking about you. How good we were together.”
“It’s best if we don’t try to recapture what we once had,” she whispered.
He wanted what they once had. Angie was the only one who had cracked the protective wall around him. She was the only person he could trust and the only woman who could turn him into knots. The power she had over him was at times troubling. There was so much he kept to himself because he knew from experience that knowledge was power. But as their relationship grew stronger, he noticed that he was sharing more about himself and his life with her. It was scary and at the same time deeply gratifying. He’d never had anything like it and he never would again.
He knew they couldn’t get what they had. Too much time had passed. Too much distance. But he wanted her back. He was willing to work toward something different. Something better. He wanted a fresh start.
Cole’s body grazed hers. He wanted to demonstrate how much he missed her. How much he loved her. “Let me in.”
She stared at him with wide eyes. “This is insane.”
Cole lowered his head and brushed his mouth against hers. Angie’s lips clung to his. Hope squeezed his chest when she didn’t pull away. He gathered her close, stepped into her apartment and kicked the door behind him.
8
ANGIE PRESSED COLE against the door. Her apartment was dark and quiet but her mind was a whirlwind. She’d wanted this since she had seen him on stage. His lap dance had invaded her dreams. It had been so long since she had felt aroused. Felt anything for a man. It was sharp and instant, making her movements clumsy as the lust poured through her veins.
A sense of urgency pulsed through her but Cole was in no rush. He savored her mouth with thorough kisses. He teased her with his tongue, darting the tip along her reddened lips before plunging into her mouth, only to withdraw.
She shivered when she felt his large, rough hands slide down her back. She leaned into Cole, arching her spine as he trailed his hands down to her bottom. He squeezed hard and she growled in the back of her throat.
Angie froze. She shouldn’t do that. The last thing she needed to remind Cole was how unladylike she was in the bedroom.
She rubbed her body restlessly against him. She wanted to tear off his clothes and climb onto his naked body. She flattened her hands against his chest and felt the heavy and uneven beat of his heart. She didn’t want to follow his lead and go slow. She needed this to be hard and fast. Next time they could have a leisurely exploration.
Next time. The words swirled in her head and she stopped rocking her hips against Cole. There would be no next time. Nothing had really changed. He said he missed her. He missed this.
This was sex.
Angie hesitated as the realization hit. Should she grab this opportunity or kick him out? Sex with Cole was once about love and connecting two souls. She had shared everything with him when they were in bed. Now he was offering this one night. There was no promise of a future yet she wanted more. It wasn’t enough.
But it was more than she had yesterday...
She should end this. One more kiss and she would break away. Cole gently cupped the back of her head and suckled her lips. She felt the pull to her core. One more kiss, she decided. And it would be the last one. The last time she shared a kiss—shared anything—with Cole Foster.
Cole broke the kiss and pressed his mouth against her ear. “You have no idea what you’re doing to me.”
She knew. His skin was hot and his raspy breath couldn’t hide his excitement. She felt his erection pressing against her. His penis was hard and thick. Angie moaned with anticipation.
A thought wafted through her mind like smoke. They should stop now. Pull away before they reached the point of no return.
Cole placed his hands on her hips and turned her around. The move was so sudden that she fell back against him. He burrowed his face in her hair as he dipped his hand lower.
Angie’s breath staggered from her throat as Cole boldly cupped her sex. She instinctively flattened her hand against his.
�
�Angie.” He dragged her name out in a rough whisper. “Let me touch you.” His fingers flexed. “Please you.”
She bit her lip as the erotic memories crashed over her. Cole not only knew how to satisfy her, but he also gave her maximum pleasure. He was generous and imaginative. Strong and loving. With one intimate touch, he could make her believe that they were made for each other.
But would she feel the same tonight? He didn’t love her. He didn’t want to share a future or even a home. All he wanted was to share a bed. Would this one time taint those special memories? Was she willing to risk feeling empty and alone for a shadow of what they used to share?
Cole delved his other hand beneath her camisole and covered her breast. He lightly pinched her stiff nipple as he stroked the folds of her sex with his other hand.
Yes, she was willing. Angie rested her head against his broad shoulder as her knees threatened to buckle. Yes, she mouthed in the darkness as she pressed the heel of her palm against his hand. She bucked against him. Yes.
“Take off my clothes,” Angie ordered softly.
“Patience,” he said.
She frowned. This was not a time to be patient. She hadn’t been able to see Cole, touch him, or hear his groans of satisfaction for a year. She needed to feel his skin on hers with no barriers. No restrictions. Angie grabbed the hem of her camisole.
“No.” Cole gave a warning nip to her earlobe. “I’m in charge.”
Angie’s fingers dug into the cotton as she considered her next move. She should have known. Last time she had been demanding and insatiable. She hadn’t held anything back, confident that Cole wanted her just as much. That he was turned on by her assertiveness.
“Let me take care of you.” Cole’s voice was low and mesmerizing. “I know what you like.” He pressed his fingertip against her throbbing clit.
“But...” Pleasure rippled lightly through her.
“I’ll give you anything you want.” His voice was urgent with need.
He would give her anything...as long as he was in charge. As long as she surrendered. She shouldn’t care, Angie decided as she closed her eyes. She hadn’t always been brazen in bed. Not until she had felt secure with Cole.
And that had been a mistake. She wouldn’t repeat it again. If she held back, if she didn’t follow every animal instinct or reckless impulse, she could have her ex-boyfriend for one more night.
Angie gradually let go of her shirt and was rewarded with Cole’s sigh. She looped her hands over his shoulders. Now she was open to his touch, giving him total control. It shouldn’t make her so nervous.
Cole grasped her jaw and tilted her head toward him. She felt the kick of power at how his fingers trembled against her chin. But his kiss was confident and demanding as he claimed her mouth.
Her skin tingled as the shameless need built inside her. She swallowed back a keening cry as she writhed against his hand. The pleasure promised to be intense. Her heart raced as her stomach twisted with wild expectation.
Angie wished Cole would stop teasing her. She wanted to turn around, strip him bare and take over. But that would put a stop to everything. There was only one thing she could do.
“Please,” she said in a jagged breath.
She bucked when Cole squeezed her nipple while also pressing against her swollen bud. The pleasure exploded inside her. Her mind shut down and she cried out. Angie slumped forward, her legs going limp. Cole caught her and gathered her close.
She was dimly aware of him carrying her. His shirt pressed against her cheek and she heard his heartbeat close to her ear. Her chest rose and fell as her muscles shook slightly. Her skin felt hot and her clothes were too confining.
Cole lowered her onto her warm, welcoming bed. She reached out for him and he wrapped his hands around hers. “First I need to find the light.”
Something close to panic gripped her chest. “No,” she said. “No lights.”
She felt Cole’s pause. “Why not?”
Angie didn’t know how to explain it. They had been lovers but this time it was different. This time she knew she wasn’t feminine enough for him. She lacked big breasts and generous hips. She didn’t have anything sexy to wear that could heighten his pleasure before he unwrapped her like a present.
She was the same person he left a year ago. A little wiser and more cautious this time around. She wasn’t going to be free and uninhibited with him. Men wanted a little mystery. A fantasy.
“Angie?”
She drew his head down and kissed him. It was meant to distract him from the light but it only managed to lower her guard. She instinctively tangled her legs with his. His jeans were scratchy against her bare skin. She was tempted to roll over, straddle Cole and shuck off his clothes.
Her body must have signaled her intent. Cole wrapped his fingers around her wrists and held her hands over her head. Her first instinct was to wrestle for control. Roll him under her and tease him with her mouth and hands. Drive him wild until he was begging for release.
Cole had loved that. Or so she thought.
He kissed a trail down her throat and circled the tip of his tongue against her trembling pulse point. She rolled her hips in response and bumped against his rock-hard penis. Her flesh clenched with desperate need. “Take off your clothes,” she insisted. She didn’t care how bossy she sounded—she wanted him naked now.
“You first,” he said with his mouth pressed against her shoulder. She gasped with appreciation as he dragged the camisole strap down with his teeth. Angie couldn’t stop herself from thrusting her breast to his mouth.
Her nipples stung and she couldn’t remain still. She wiggled her hips against Cole and her legs locked behind his. She fought for self-control until he took her breast in his mouth. Angie surrendered to his touch.
She allowed her legs to drop as she sinuously arched her back. Her short, choppy breaths mingled with his. He drew sharply on her nipple and let go of her hands so he could fondle her breasts. His touch grew increasingly impatient as his restraint started to crumble.
Angie grabbed the back of his head, her fingertips tangled in his thick hair. Sweat bathed her skin as the heat billowed inside her.
Cole slid her boyshorts down her legs. She kicked them off as he settled between her thighs.
“Wait,” he said hoarsely. She heard the metallic sound of his zipper and the rustle of his clothes. His shoes hit the floor. She lowered her hands onto the bed, clutching the sheets, as she held back from shoving his jeans off him.
She licked her swollen lips, excitement squeezing her lungs, as he placed his firm hands on her thighs. Angie took a deep breath when she felt the tip of his penis pressing against her. Her sharp intake echoed in her ears as Cole surged forward.
Angie went still for a brief moment as her body yielded to his. Blood roared in her ears as her skin flushed. Immediately, she tilted her hips and drew him in more.
Cole’s thrusts were strong and steady. His hands were everywhere. Her stomach fluttered from his gentle, clumsy caress and her nipples tightened as he massaged her breasts.
Her heart skipped a beat when he stroked her hair before drawing his fingertips along her cheek. He placed his thumb against her chin, guiding her mouth open before he kissed her hard.
His kiss was possessive. Elemental. He was reminding her of his claim. And it triggered something primal inside her. Angie wrapped her arms and legs tightly against him and rolled them over.
Now she straddled Cole. He didn’t seem to mind. She couldn’t see his face but she heard snatches of his encouraging words. His fingers pressed into her hips, clearly approving of her frenetic pace.
She tore off her camisole and tossed it away. Angie flattened her hands on his chest, twisting his shirt in between her fingers as she followed an ancient rhythm. Her hair fell in her face, her skin felt like it was going to burst open and the desire coiling deep in her pelvis sprang wildly.
Her muscles locked and her body stilled as she climaxed. It stole her breath a
nd she felt as if she were falling. She held on to Cole, grinding her hips against his hurried thrusts. She tumbled against him just as she heard his hoarse cry of release.
She lay next to him, her face pressed against his, as she struggled for her next breath. As she closed her eyes, Angie realized that nostalgia had played with her memory.
Sex with Cole was better than she had remembered.
* * *
COLE DIDN’T WANT to move. Angie was curled around him, soft and naked. She was his for the night and he wanted to hold on to this moment. He waited until Angie had fallen asleep before he changed positions. She didn’t make a sound of complaint when he turned over and laid her tenderly on her pillow.
He wanted to stay with her. In the past he would toss the blanket over them to keep the world at bay and hold her all night. Those quiet minutes always meant a lot to him. Too much. Angie had made him feel special and wanted. She had made him feel as if he had found home.
He felt that tonight. He had been hesitant to embrace the feeling because he knew he couldn’t hold on to it. He knew it wasn’t real. They weren’t a couple anymore and he needed to remember that. If he fell for the illusion, it would break him and he wouldn’t be able to recover.
He reluctantly got out of bed and tucked the blanket over Angie. He tripped over his shoe and winced. Cole was about to turn on the bedside lamp but stopped as his fingertips brushed against the switch.
Why didn’t Angie want the light on? That was unusual. She was not shy when it came to sex. In fact, she was the opposite. He loved that about her, but tonight he wanted to make it all about her pleasure. Why did she want it dark? Was she ashamed that she had fallen back in bed with him? Or did she still believe in the gossip that he didn’t find her sexy enough?
He was going to fix that, Cole decided as he grabbed his jeans and yanked them on. He wasn’t sure how he could prove his desire. Wasn’t it already obvious? He was always aware of Angie and constantly dragging his gaze away only to find he was still staring at her.
And these days he couldn’t stop touching her. Cole sighed as he picked up his shoes. He had found every excuse to hold her hand or touch her hair. And if he wasn’t doing either of those things, he was likely touching her back to guide her as they walked. She didn’t say anything when he placed his hand on her shoulder or waist. Did she know it was his way of showing the world that Angie was still his?