by Valerie Parv
Suiting the action to the thought, she went to her room and searched through her things for a clipboard and pen and the camera she used to take photographs for the journal.
“Now we’ll find out what sort of actor you’d make,” she told her image in the mirror. She was alarmed at how pale she was beneath her light tan. Her teal blue eyes were ringed by violet shadows, but they lightened when she forced a grin at her reflection. The result was a bit bizarre but it was better than looking like Little Orphan Annie.
She was still practicing the grin when she let herself into the coach house but Nicholas didn’t bother to look up from his computer. Maree was standing in the play area, her chubby fingers clenched around the bars of the safety fence. She gurgled a string of nonsense words, making the only greeting Bethany got.
It was what she wanted, she told herself. Still, nobody said she had to like it. “Do you mind if I take some photos and notes on the dollhouse now?” she asked Nicholas’s unrelenting back.
He barely looked up. “Suit yourself.”
“Thanks. I’m thinking of devoting a whole issue to it.” But he was already back at work so she climbed the stairs to the loft, uncovered the magnificent dollhouse and started making notes. At any other time she would have considered it a privilege to spend as long as she wanted examining and photographing such a treasure, but part of her mind kept drifting to the man downstairs.
Of all the men in the universe, why did she have to be attracted to one with such a strong paternal instinct? To make matters worse, his easy affinity with Maree was one of his most beguiling features. Her insides twisted into knots every time she saw him cradle the little girl against the hard wall of his chest or rock her to sleep in his arms. Would Bethany want to wish that away if she could? It was sorely tempting to say yes but she knew it wasn’t true. The mix of toughness and tenderness was what made him special.
A sigh whistled between her lips. It was also what made a future together impossible.
She closed the notebook with a thump. Her heart wasn’t in the project right now. Maybe later when she’d had time to come to terms with her decision she could plan the article, but not yet. She reached for her camera. Nicholas would expect to hear her taking photographs so she may as well do so.
Two rolls of film later she had enough views of the house from all sides to illustrate several features. She took some close-up shots of individual pieces of furniture, then carefully replaced them in the house before closing it up and covering it again.
Nicholas was still at his desk when she went downstairs. “I have all I need for today, thank you,” she said without expecting a response.
He turned to her. “I’ve been thinking. It isn’t fair to expect you to stay here indefinitely when you have—other commitments. I have to go to Melbourne tomorrow to meet with the premier. While I’m in the city I’ll see what I can do to find a replacement caretaker for Maree.”
The coldness in his tone made her heart sink. Her performance with the dollhouse had been unnecessary. He had already bought the fiction that she was a career person with no interest in domesticity.
There was nothing she could say without contradicting her cover story so she nodded. “There’s no hurry. I’m happy to stay until you find the right person.”
“Thank you. I’ll try not to detain you too long.”
The air was so thick with his disapproval she could have cut it with a knife. He couldn’t wait to be rid of her, she thought miserably. Reminding herself that she was doing the right thing for them both—the only thing she could do—was small consolation.
“Did you get everything you wanted upstairs?” he asked, his voice glacial.
“I still need to interview you about the house’s history,” she reminded him, finding herself contrarily pleased to have a reason to linger. “It can wait till you get back from Melbourne.”
His answering look was ironic. “It will have to.”
Before she could respond, the oak door creaked open and a stunningly beautiful woman walked in. “Your housekeeper told me I’d find you here, Nicholas.”
The woman launched herself across the room and into Nicholas’s arms, which came up reflexively to surround her. “Hello, Lana. What brings you here?”
Something cold and hard took root inside Bethany. This must be Lana Sinden, the model Nicholas had been seeing. She was every bit as gorgeous as her pictures in the magazines, with a glowing milky white skin and hair the color of buttermilk cascading in a satin curtain down her back.
Belatedly she noticed Bethany. “Who’s this?”
“Lana Sinden meet Bethany Dale. Bethany has been taking care of Maree for me,” he explained.
Lana’s smile gleamed widely. “You finally found a nanny for the little pet. I must have sensed it when I decided to come back.”
Nicholas frowned. “Bethany isn’t a nanny. She’s here as a favor to me.”
Lana’s finely pencilled eyebrows arched. “My apologies, Bethany. You must be doing a great job to keep Maree so—quiet.” She winced a little at this but her smile was disarming. “You’ll have to give me some pointers.”
“Thinking of taking over Maree’s care, Lana?” Nicholas sounded skeptical.
The model gave a slight shudder. “You know I’d be useless at it.” She shot Bethany a wary glance before turning to Nicholas. “Can we talk privately?”
Bethany started for the door. “I was going back to the house, anyway. Shall I take Maree with me?”
“Yes,” Lana said.
“No,” Nicholas said much more forcefully. “You don’t have to go, either, Bethany. Lana and I said everything we had to say before she packed up and left.”
“You mean you won’t give me a chance to apologize?”
“I won’t stop you. But you were right, country life and baby care aren’t your thing. There’s no need to apologize for being honest.”
Lana draped herself elegantly over the corner of Nicholas’s desk. “You’re probably right. I did have some notion of starting over, but I can see you’re as stubborn as ever.”
He sat back and folded his arms across his broad chest. “Why did you come back, really?”
Lana’s glance flickered to Bethany and back to Nicholas. “To hold you to your promise to let Spellbound magazine do a photo spread here with me and Maree. They want to call it ‘The Sexy Single Mother.’”
Bethany felt sick. It didn’t even occur to Lana that Maree was a person, not a prop to be used to further her career. Nicholas evidently agreed because he shook his head. “I won’t go back on my word, although I gave it before you walked out, but I don’t want Maree used in such a way.”
Lana looked pleadingly at him. “I’ve already told them you’ll agree. Surely you wouldn’t make a liar out of me now, after all we’ve been to each other.”
“Don’t tempt me.”
“I was there for you and the baby when she first came to you,” Lana reminded him tautly. “Staying up till all hours when she cried half the night.”
His mouth became a thin slash. “I wasn’t aware we were keeping score.”
“We’re not, but you did promise, Nicholas. It won’t take long, and Bethany can be there to make sure Maree is looked after.”
It would probably suit Lana well to have Bethany on hand for any dirty work, she thought uncharitably. Then there was no chance the model would have to do it herself.
But Nicholas shook his head. “Maree isn’t there to make you look decorative.”
Lana frowned prettily. “But you won’t stop me using Yarrawong as a background for some photos.”
“What about the sexy single mother?” he asked ironically.
“They can change it to the sexy rural life, as long as they have me against a beautiful rural background,” she amended. “I took you at your word and arranged everything.”
Lana looked utterly crushed. All the same, Bethany was surprised when Nicholas relented. “Very well, I did promise, so you can take your
photos here. But the crew is not to disturb Maree. I’m giving Bethany sole discretion to ensure they don’t.”
Lana looked relieved. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.” She leaned down and kissed Nicholas on the lips, her full mouth moving seductively over his. “Thank you, darling. What would I do without you?”
“Find someone else to wrap around your little finger,” he muttered. But he didn’t look too put out at being kissed by Lana. Bethany’s own reaction caught her by surprise. For the first time in her life she understood the temptation to scratch another woman’s eyes out.
It was hardly a defensible position, since she had disqualified herself as a lover for Nicholas, but it didn’t stop a powerful wave of possessiveness from surging over her at the sight of Lana and Nicholas together.
“When does your crew want to come?” he asked, disentangling himself.
Lana smiled. “Tomorrow if it’s convenient. We’re working to a deadline.”
“So am I. I’m meeting with the premier tomorrow in Melbourne.”
Lana’s smile faded. “I’ll call the magazine and set another date.”
“There’s no need. You don’t need me for your photographic session. I’d probably spend the time in my office and you wouldn’t see me, anyway. Bethany is here to look after Maree. And you do know your way around the property, after all.”
At the pointed reminder that the model had lived with Nicholas at Yarrawong until recently, Bethany felt her stomach lurch. She had no right to feel jealous, but she was afraid it was exactly what she did feel.
Nicholas turned to her. “I won’t agree unless you’re comfortable with this, Bethany.”
Spending a day in Lana’s company would remind Bethany of all she was giving up, but with Nicholas away, she couldn’t abandon Maree to the model’s care. “I’ll manage,” she said heavily. His look of gratitude warmed her far more than was wise. It didn’t help to think of the favor as her parting gift to him.
Chapter Seven
“What’s wrong, Bethany?” he asked her next morning over breakfast. “Won’t you be in your element with Lana’s people here? You could make some valuable contacts to boost your publishing career.”
Some career person she was. The thought had never crossed her mind. Admitting it would undermine his belief in her plans she said, “You’re right. It will be fascinating to watch the experts at work.”
He drained his coffee cup and stood up. “Remember, you’re in charge. Lana can be overpowering if she thinks she can get away with it.”
At the reminder of how well he knew Lana, Bethany shivered. She couldn’t believe he was as indifferent to the model as he appeared. Lana was the one who walked out, so perhaps this was his way of getting even.
“It’s a pity you can’t stay and watch her at work,” she said, striving for fairness.
“I’ve had the privilege often enough to know it’s a tedious business. Lots of standing around waiting, then a flurry of activity followed by more standing around. Not much fun for an onlooker.” He moved closer, and her breathing quickened automatically. “Although you’ll no doubt enjoy yourself.”
He didn’t know it but she mainly welcomed the photographic crew as a means of passing the hours until he got back. This would be the first time he’d been gone all day since she arrived, and already she felt lonely for him. Bethany couldn’t help herself. Her eyes devoured him with the same enthusiasm Maree had shown for her breakfast.
His navy Armani suit managed to make his shoulders look broader and his body more hard muscled than usual. When he bent to replace a glass in a cupboard, the dark slacks stretched over his rear and she felt her knees weaken. Her breathing eased when he stood up, although watching him tuck his silk tie back into place was another exercise in self-control.
This would have to stop. Soon she would be back in Melbourne and he would be part of her past The prospect was enough to make her feel physically ill.
He caught her arms. “Hey, you’ve gone pale. Are you okay?”
Since her problem was a severe attack of imagining life without Nicholas, she couldn’t very well tell him what was wrong. His touch made her heart flutter, but thankfully brought color back to her cheeks. “I’m fine,” she lied, twisting free of his hold. “Isn’t it time you got going?”
His features hardened as he misunderstood. “Anxious to get me out of here so you can start the important business of the day?”
She turned away to hide her moist eyes. “Say goodbye to Daddy, Maree.”
She lifted the child’s tiny hand and Maree waved, making a sound that might or might not have been “bye-bye.”
He kissed the child’s downy head. “Be a good girl for Bethany.” Picking up his briefcase he went to the door. “Enjoy yourselves.”
“We’ll see you off.”
On impulse she gathered Maree out of the high chair and followed him out to his car. He turned and waved, and she urged Maree to wave back. It was such a domestic scene that her throat caught. She could be his wife with their child in her arms, seeing her husband off to work. The beauty of the fantasy was almost overwhelming.
A wagon train of vehicles rolled into the clearing in front of the house, shattering the moment. Nicholas frowned as dust drifted over his Porsche, then frowned harder as Lana leaped from the lead car and threw herself at him.
“Darling, I’m glad you’re still here. Come and meet the Spellbound crew.” She towed Nicholas toward the cars disgorging people loaded with what looked like a ton of photographic equipment.
“Spellbound” was right, Bethany decided, watching them cluster around Lana. Nicholas looked as if he would prefer to be on his way, but smiled and shook hands as he was introduced around. However, he didn’t seem to object to Lana’s arm linking with his as she drew him into her circle, Bethany noted.
She felt no need to join the introductions. Her job was to look after Maree and keep out of the way. She told herself it was what she was doing when she carried the baby back inside.
As Nicholas absently responded to Lana’s introductions, he saw Bethany walk away and was waylaid by an urge to go after her, unable to shake the conviction that he had the wrong woman clinging to his arm. Lana was beautiful, he couldn’t deny it. But she worked hard at her appearance while Bethany’s appearance was entirely natural. What you saw was what you got.
Her looks were entirely unselfconscious, something he could hardly say about Lana. Bethany didn’t need perfect makeup or designer casual clothes to accentuate her beauty. That thing she was wearing, long and slinky with a patchwork skirt and black figure-hugging top, did such amazing things for her shape, he wished he could put the premier on hold for a few days and remain here.
The notion astonished him. Why didn’t he feel the same way about Lana, who was the pinup of half the men in the country? Could it be because Lana would never put anything on hold for him?
He sighed. She was a lovely, sexy, desirable woman but she was also closed off to him in a way he hadn’t understood until he’d met someone different. He had to admit that he knew more about Bethany after a few weeks than he knew about Lana after years. Oh, not the statistical stuff. Lana’s was on file for the world to read. But what caused her joy or pain, what made her laugh or cry, whom did she count among her closest friends?
With Bethany he had a feeling that once she took you into her heart, you had a friend for life. What made Lana laugh or cry changed with prevailing fashions, and whom she thought of as a friend depended on expediency.
Take this crowd, for instance. Lana called them her friends and they treated her like royalty, but once the shoot ended they would transfer their loyalty to the next contender without a backward glance. It reminded Nicholas of when he had accompanied Lana to a guest appearance on a national television show. Lana had absorbed the star treatment beforehand—the limousines, the champagne and the flattery—like mother’s milk. Then as soon as her spot ended it was as if she had ceased to exist. Bethany would never confuse suc
h treatment with real friendship.
He already knew she was the kind to carry home stray animals or stray humans. He also knew only too well the fire in her response when he kissed her. He felt his mouth twist wryly as he remembered the feel of her supple body in his arms and the heat of her pliant lips against his own. Underneath the layers of Mother Teresa there was a goodly helping of Gypsy Rose Lee.
Lana tugged at his arm. “What are you smiling at? You’re miles away.”
He frowned and disengaged his arm. “It’s where I should be by now.”
She pouted prettily. “Can’t you stay for a few hours. I work better when you’re around to watch.”
She worked better when everybody watched, he thought. “You’ll be fine. You have the run of Yarrawong and Bethany will make sure the crew has everything they need.”
“Everything except you,” Lana persisted. “You didn’t waste time replacing me with your little friend.”
“She isn’t little and she’s nobody’s replacement.” Both were true. “Without Bethany’s help with Maree I would never have finished this government project on time.”
“She is on the chunky side, isn’t she?” Lana heard only the first thing he said, the thing she wanted to hear. Compared to Lana’s thinness, Bethany was more curvaceous, but for the life of him, he couldn’t see it as a failing.
“Why is any woman with meat on her bones, chunky?” he demanded irritably. The more Lana forced him to compare the two women, the more he appreciated Bethany’s special qualities, which was hardly Lana’s intention. “There’s such a thing as being too thin, you know.”
The model lifted her arms in a graceful gesture. “You didn’t say that when you used to hold me.”
He may not have said it, but he had often thought it. “I was too distracted,” he dissembled, knowing it would mollify her even if it wasn’t the whole truth. Their relationship might be over, whether Lana accepted it or not, but it didn’t mean he had to hurt her.