by Paula Cox
He was standing in the kitchen when I opened the door. “What happened?” he asked as soon as he saw me.
“What do you mean?”
“It looks like you have been crying.”
“Problems at work. Why are you still here? Shouldn’t you be on your way to Dallas by now?”
“I just woke up an hour or so ago. I thought I would wait until you got home and say goodbye.”
“Goodbye,” I said as I moved past him.
“Do you want to tell me about it?” he asked as he turned to follow me into my bedroom.
“No.”
“Okay,” he said, but then he stepped up to me and gathered me into his arms and held me.
I let him hold me a moment and I could feel the tears threatening again. “They’re going to fire me,” I said as the tears began to leak out of my eyes.
“Why?”
“I’m off my game and they know it. I get so tired by the end of the shift and I feel sick all the time – not like I’m going to puke at any moment, but like it would only take a nudge to set me off. Eating helps, but it doesn’t help enough.”
“I’m sorry,” he said as his arms tightened down briefly.
I expected a lecture but he said nothing else. I eased my way out of his embrace. “Will you come sit with me a moment? Please? I need someone to talk to.” I led him to the couch where we sat down and I leaned into his side. “I don’t know what I’m going to do. I’m already doing the best I can.”
“What did your boss say?”
“Nothing, really, just that I had to get my act together, that I was a draw for The Claw and I wasn’t pulling my weight. He wasn’t nasty or anything, but as he said, he couldn’t play favorites and I wasn’t doing my job.” I sniffed as I fought back the tears.
“I wish there were something I could do to help you,” he said as he kissed me on the hair.
“You’ve been trying,” I said quietly.
“I know. But I wish I could do more. I wish there were something I could do to help you feel better. I’m afraid it’s going to get worse before it gets better.”
“I’m so tired of feeling sick all the time.”
“I know.”
We sat still and quiet for a long time. I rolled onto a hip so I could snuggle in a little closer and I could feel my eyes getting heavy. When I was with Cain I wanted him with me. He was so supportive, kind, and generous. Why was I always beating up on him? I realized the problem wasn’t Cain; it was me. I was the problem. He had been nothing but reliable, supportive, and caring.
“When do you have to leave for Dallas?” I murmured.
“When you go to bed.”
“I don’t want to go to bed. I want to sit here, with you.” I snuggled in closer still and stretched up to kiss his neck.
“Alex…don’t. This is hard enough as it is.”
“I’m sorry for the way I have treated you. It was wrong. You have done everything you said you would. You’ve been here every time I needed someone.” I felt the tears trying to start again, but this time in shame for what I had done. “I don’t want you to go.”
“Alex, please…”
“Will you stay with me for a while and just hold me? I want you to hold me so I can feel like everything will be all right.” I sniffed, and I adjusted my position so I could lean in tight.
He moved with me, taking me into his embrace. “Hear…hear now. Don’t cry. It’s going to be okay. We’ll get through this. Don’t cry, Alex.”
I leaned up, offering my lips, and when he didn’t take them, I pulled his head down as I stretched for them. He didn’t resist, but he was holding back. I turned, pushing myself up higher, dumping all my fears and frustrations into that kiss, tasting him as my tongue danced along his lips.
His mouth opened, finally accepting the kiss, and I pressed in, needing to feel his strength. Despite what he did, he had always been there for me, always willing to do more.
“Alex, stop,” he breathed as he pulled back from the kiss.
“Stay the night with me. Cain, I don’t want you to go.”
“We’ve been down this road before,” he said, the bitterness thick in his voice.
“I know, but not tonight. I was wrong. I want you to stay. You’re a good man, and I think you will be good father. Please, stay with me. Not just tonight. Give me a chance to...”
“To what?”
“To get to know you. To… fall in love with you.”
“Do you mean that? The last time you wanted me to take you to bed, you ended up kicking me out and telling me to never come back. What’s changed?”
“Me! I’ve changed! I thought I could do this alone, but it’s too much.” I looked down, ashamed to have to admit it. “I need help, Cain. I need your help. I can’t do this by myself.”
“I’m not leaving the Hounds.”
“I know. You said you needed time to work something out. Is that still true? Can you, will you, still do that?”
He paused as he gazed into my eyes. “Yes. If you will give me the time, I will work something out, some compromise we can both live with.”
I didn’t want to share him with the Hounds, but it was time for me to start trying to meet him halfway. I whimpered softly as I was flooded with emotions that I couldn’t understand. Hope and regret, elation and disappointment. “We can try, can’t we?”
He smiled, the first genuine smile I had seen since this morning. “We can try. That’s all I’m asking for. A chance.”
This time he pulled me into the kiss and I melted into him. It may not last, or we may find out that we are not compatible, but for that moment, at least, I felt a great weight being lifted from my shoulders.
“Take me to bed.”
“Are you sure? If I make this commitment, if I trust you, there is no going back,” he breathed as he held my face, his eyes intense. “When I make promises, they are for keeps.”
I whimpered again, his words plucking at my heartstrings, offering comfort and support beyond what I felt from friends and family. “Promise you will always be here for me,” I begged, needing to hear the words.
“I will always be here for you. Always. You have my word,” he whispered before he covered my mouth with his own.
I decided that I was going to do it, that I was going to make the leap of faith as my grandmother had. I leaned into the kiss, forcing Cain’s head back as I rose and sat astride of him, losing myself in the kiss. He pulled me in, holding me tight, his arms wrapping around me and holding me so that I felt protected in a way that I never had before.
He pulled back from the kiss, his lips going to the hollow of my throat where he kissed, his tongue busy caressing my skin. I didn’t love him, but I wanted to. I wanted to fall deeply, madly, head over heels, can’t live without him, in love with him. I opened my heart and, once again, I felt the connections form, tenuous, delicate, easily broken, but there.
“I want you,” I whispered as I held his head to my neck, my face leaning lightly against his hair.
He rose, picking me up with him, and carried me to my bedroom as I wrapped my legs around his back. This was a near repeat of the last time I asked him to stay, but this time I wouldn’t send him away. He dumped me into the bed, falling with me, pressing me into the mattress with his weight. He stared at me, perhaps wondering if I was going to twist the knife again, and I smiled at him.
“When do you have to leave for Dallas?”
I saw him think about it. “I have to leave no later than eight in the morning.”
“Stay with me until then, until eight, and not leave one minute sooner?”
“I won’t hurt you, Alex. I promise.”
“I know,” I said as I pulled his lips to mine.
I heard him breathe deep, then the kiss came alive, and I welcomed it. It was more than just a kiss; he was making me a promise, a promise that I gladly accepted and returned in kind. As the kiss began to spiral out of control, I pushed at him. He rose up on his hands and looked
at me, his facing darkening in hurt and anger.
I smiled, silently telling him that I wasn’t toying with his emotions. “Undress, I whispered as I pushed him away and slid out from under him. “I’ll be right back.”
I hurried into the bathroom and relieved myself before undressing and returning to the bedroom. He was there, the linens covering him to the waist, the bed turned back in invitation. I felt a tingle of anticipation and excitement as I slid between the linens. Each time we had made love it had been special, magical even, and I was looking forward to tonight. I draped myself over him and kissed him with everything I had. If I was going to go all in with this man, then I was going to go all in and hold nothing back.
He rolled, forcing me over onto my back, cradling me in his arms, and then he kissed me. And damn, what a kiss. As he sucked gently on my lower lip I could feel my toes curl as erotic energy poured into me. Then his lips were gone, yet they seemed to be everywhere as he caressed me with lips and tongue, working his way down my body. I squirmed in delight as he teased the inside of my thigh with his tongue, and then gasped as his lips tickled a place behind my right knee that caused me to flood with wetness. He was turning me inside out in pleasure with his soft kisses and teasing strokes.
I tried to fight back, tried to take control so I could please him as he was pleasing me, but he was a force of nature, rolling over me and leaving me gasping for breath, and he hadn’t even touched my most intimate place yet. He reared up on his knees, my lower leg between his, as my big toe found its way into his mouth. He dragged his fingers softly along the back of my leg as he sucked, and I shuddered as erotic fire danced along my nerves. But he wasn’t done. As his fingernails scraped gently along the back of my leg on a return trip, he drove into me, a sudden insertion that caught me by surprise and made me gasp in delight. I had been so wrapped up in his touching that I hadn’t even noticed that he had positioned himself to enter me.
He held himself deep inside, unmoving, while he kissed along my leg. “Please,” I begged softly as I began to thrust my hips, trying to get him started, but he refused to move. He swung my leg over, tipping me up onto my side, and placed my upper leg over his, so that I had a prop, before he began to move. But my god, when he did, pleasure exploded from me in a way I had never experienced before. I clamped down on his leg, and his cock, the tightness like nothing I had felt before. He moved slowly, doling out the pleasure in measures that had me swimming in ecstasy as his hardness touched me in ways I had never been touched before.
I felt wild and out of control. “Ram it,” I begged, reaching for my orgasm. “Ram it into me…”
The groan that escaped Cain as he began to drive into me hard and fast was the most erotic sound I had ever heard. I began to burn in orgasmic fire, my skin hot as if I were suffering from a sun burn while my orgasm rose to a frightful, towering, height.
“Yes… yes… yes… I’m coming,” I whispered as he continued to drive into me. With the power of a thunderclap, my orgasm collapsed, overwhelming me with erotic fire. I wanted to scream in pleasure, cry my orgasm to the world as I tore at the linens with my upper hand, battling my body for control, channeling the scream of completion into a low moan.
I felt a hitch into Cain’s motion as I lay awash in the aftermath of my orgasm. “I can’t…” he grunted out as another shudder passed through him and he growled deep and feral.
He was fighting his orgasm, but I wanted him to come. I wanted him to come just as hard as I had, for us to finish at nearly the same moment. “Harder,” I begged, egging him on, trying to drive him to orgasm.
“I’m going to come,” he gasped, his strokes becoming even harder and faster.
“Don’t fight —” I began, but before I could even complete the thought, he shuddered hard and drove in deep, holding himself there as he grunted softly with each splash of heat I felt inside of me.
He disentangled himself from my legs and flopped to his back behind me, pulling me in close and wrapping me in his arms with a deep sigh as he tipped up onto his side, tucking his knees in behind mine. I smiled as I wiggled backwards, tucking in tight, enjoying the feel of his still hard manhood pressing against my ass and his chest into my back. I wanted to say something, anything, but I couldn’t find the words, so I reached behind me and gave his leg a soft caress.
“Thank you for letting me stay… for giving me a chance,” he murmured as he nuzzled at my neck.
I smiled and sighed softly to myself as I closed my eyes. I floated, hovering between wakefulness and sleep, that period when everything seemed so clear, and I wondered why I had been frightened of him. Here, now, in his arms, I felt as safe and protected as I ever had in my life. He would always be here for me; I could feel it in the way held me. I was safe, and everything would work out for the best. I sighed again and allowed sleep to take me, my smile still on my lips.
Chapter 16
I was sitting in my new office, fuming. Peter had dropped the news on me yesterday that I had been replaced as the bartender, effective immediately. That little tidbit of news had come less than a week after I came clean and admitted to him I was pregnant. I didn’t want to tell him, but I felt like he should know before he figured it out himself.
Up until yesterday, these past two weeks had been better than any time since I found out I was pregnant. After he had left, Cain had called me every afternoon before I left for work, and having him try to cheer me up after a bad night was nice. I was still struggling with my act and he had encouraged me to come clean with Peter. The worst that could happen, as he pointed out, was I could be fired.
I hadn’t been fired; I had been “promoted,” if you could call it that. I was now in charge of inventory at the bar. Peter had told me he needed someone to take some of the bookkeeping duties off his plate, and claimed this was a perfect opportunity. I had even been given me a small raise. The problem was that over half of my income before came from tips… tips that I no longer received.
Even worse, he had replaced me with “Titillating Tina,” the bartender from Over Easy, a competing joint from across town. She was a pretty good flairtender, but not as good as I was, and I had taken her out in the local flairtending competition to move on to the district match. That was just another thing in the long line of bad blood between The Cat’s Claw and Over Easy, each establishment talking smack and stealing talent from the other.
I picked up my phone and dialed Cain’s number. He would be calling in a couple of hours for his regular check in, but I needed to vent now.
“What are you doing up so early?” he asked in greeting.
“I’m at work.”
“Work?”
“Yeah. I’ve been promoted.” I got up and shut my door. I didn’t need Peter to overhear me bitching.
“That’s great! Promoted to what?”
“No, it’s not great. I’m in charge of inventory, ordering the food and liquor, that sort of thing. The only good thing is that I work eight to five, Monday through Friday, like a normal person.”
“Why isn’t that good?”
“Because now I don’t get tips. Even though I got a raise, I am still taking a huge pay cut.”
“Oh. Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later. At least now maybe you can rest better and you won’t be around all the smells that upset you.”
“I guess,” I mumbled.
“Are you surprised?”
“No. Well, maybe a little. I wouldn’t have been surprised if he had fired me.”
“Well, he didn’t, so that must mean that he thinks you’re valuable enough to keep around. He was also probably worried about you and the baby.”
“How so?”
“The way things are today? He may have been concerned that if the baby was born with a problem, you would sue him for an unsafe workplace or something.”
“I wouldn’t do that!”
“I know. But I’m sure it has happened before.”
“Yeah. Maybe.”
“Hey, chee
r up! Now maybe you won’t feel sick all the time. That has to be worth something, right?”
I smiled. “Yeah. A lot actually. If it works.”
“I can call you later tonight?” he asked.
“Yeah. That will be nice. I can tell you how my day went before the next day.”
“I would like that. But I have to run. There’s a problem.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah. There is a rival club that is stirring up trouble.”
I felt my blood run cold. This was the very thing I had been worried about. “Trouble, how?”
“Nothing to worry about. They are like one of those barky little dogs. They are trying to steal one of our customers away.”