by Paula Cox
Chapter Twenty-Eight
It didn’t seem possible. Not after all they had shared and how she had fought to all common sense just so she could touch him again. He’d said he would kill for her. Something in that made Lena love him even more. But then, right before her eyes, he dismissed her like a burden he had to drag into this meeting. So what if he was finally here because of her? Lena still felt like she was clothed in a second thought and wanted to scream at the top of her lungs to just leave. Silver stallions or skulls with wings, each and every one of them were the same, flapping their dicks and marking their turf. That’s all she was to him, and Jax was only enraged because she’d compromised his precious position.
Lived with it for far too long.
In some ways that was true. He’d dwelled in Eric Stiles’ house and had to call him father. But the rape? What was the knowledge of that to him? A few days suffering at most?
And now he had to tell them she would go back to being nothing if Eric breached this threshold.
Thinking of nothing but putting Milo in his place and Jax too by way of nearness if nothing else, Lena took a breath. If he couldn’t stand up for her, be the man she wanted, then what was the point?
Moving past him, she felt his hands encircle hers, and his heart thudded against her palm. Jax stayed silent, but as soon as Lena met his eyes, her heart softened. Maybe his tongue was tied, but his gaze and his pulse told her more than she wanted to know. Because Milo had asked the wrong question, or at least was bound to get the answer he wanted least.
“Jax…”
He would always choose her; Lena knew that in her bones. Not for one second did she regret coming back for him. But was there a way to stay put, get all he wanted and then some?
And still keep him close?
“I… Sir?”
Lena endured Milo’s laughter and felt Jax’s fingers pressing into her arm as he tried to drag her back into the shadows.
“Stop,” she insisted. Jax demurred as the room erupted into laughter, but Lena turned back to Milo and narrowed her gaze.
“Fine then,” she said. “Milo.”
The bearded man seemed to bristle at the sound of his name leaving her lips, but Lena shrugged the chuckles and Aggie off as she stepped closer.
“If we’re a problem for you,” she started. “We’ll be on our way. No harm, no foul, right?”
Lena bit down on her lip and hoped that it was the right step when Milo laughed and shook his head.
“And just wait for another surprise?” he asked. “All three of you have already exposed us. Maybe I can save Aggie and her boy if you go quietly.”
Again he raised his gun, and Lena tensed as she waited for what felt like the end. But instead of the crack of a bullet leaving the chamber and everything going dark, there was nothing but Jax at her side.
“I won’t let you hurt her!” he bellowed.
Lena felt Jax’s arms surrounding her waist. Wanting nothing more than to sink into his chest, Lena knew even Milo’s pardon would not mean freedom. Eric was coming. Who knew what moves he was making even now? Not knowing how far they could make it on their own, she pushed away from Jax and sank to her knees.
“Lena! What do you think you’re doing?”
Aggie kept her son at bay as Lena’s fingers surrounded the barrel of Jax’s gun, and she helped him guide the piece towards her brow, her eyes growing wide as she spoke slowly.
“Nothing would give me more pleasure than to go and never see you again,” she started. “But you would really make him choose?”
“Price of my protection,” Milo said. “I need to know where his loyalties lie.”
“With her!” Jax insisted.
“Jackson, don’t,” Aggie cautioned.
“What else can I say? If he doesn’t want to believe it…”
And he wouldn’t. Milo would always put his club first. Just like Jax would her. How to spin it? How could she make him…?
“Who is she?”
The girl with the short dark hair cowered in the corner, and Milo waved her forward, Artie looking up and down her legs as Milo pressed the girl under his arm.
“This is Viv,” Milo said. “My sister. We take care of what’s worthy around here.”
Lena looked hard into the girl’s eyes and forced herself to remember.
“So it’ll go down like this,” she said. “Eric Stiles will come. And he’ll lie that Jax was a bad seed. He’ll apologize for any inconvenience.”
Feeling exposed, Lena ran her fingers through her hair and lowered her voice.
“And once he makes like he’s on your side, he’ll take a long hard look at Viv here.”
“You leave my sister out of this.”
“Then it will be him asking for a taste to seal your new deal.”
“I would never let him touch her,” Milo insisted.
“But by then it won’t be your choice anymore,” Lena continued. “He’ll strip her down and push her to a floor.”
It killed her where she knelt, but Lena had no choice but to stare at Viv.
“It will hurt. You’ll cry. And you’ll plead for him to stop.”
A hand was at her shoulder, but Lena couldn’t bring herself to meet Jax’s eyes.
“Take it from me, he won’t, not until you’re shredded, not until you just wish you could die.”
As Lena shifted to her feet, and a strange calm washed over her. With no way of knowing how many other moments she had at her disposal, she was still standing now, and she turned, expecting to see Jax.
“I…”
The eyes were his, but not the form.
“You don’t have to say another word,” Aggie said. “Milo, come on now.”
He eased his sister away and looked at Lena, his eyes burrowing into her blood. Lena took some satisfaction in the fact that she was no longer trembling, and Aggie’s hands at her shoulders helped her stand taller still
“Prick did all that to you,” Milo started. “Lots of other girls wouldn’t be so strong as to bounce back and stand toe-toe with the consequences.”
She didn’t feel so strong, but it was something to get it all out in front of so many and see, feel, that it didn’t kill her where she stood.
“We’d all be stronger if you just said yes,” Lena dared.
Milo seemed to ponder the possibilities, and he smiled softly as he patted his sister’s hand and held her at his back.
“Still thinking it over,” he said. “But I’m almost on your wavelength.”
She heard Brutus grunt as Aggie passed her back into Jax’s arms and touched her son’s cheek.
“Now you can get a good night’s sleep,” she promised. “It’ll all make sense in the morning.”
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Once they were back in the bedroom and hidden away from the club, Lena’s body hit the closed door, and she released a long sigh as she lowered her eyes. Hard as the telling was, she had proven a point. Milo still needed his time? Fine. But he shouldn’t take too long. There was no more evidence to give when it came to Eric Stiles, and as she lifted her lids and reached her fingers into the air, she expected to find Jax right there, anxious for her touch.
But he had already slumped to the bed, his head heavy against his chest as she stared at him.
“Jax?”
He parted his lips to speak, but his words seemed to stick in his throat as she started to step towards him. She spoke his name again when he groaned and turned his head away.
“You shouldn’t have done that,” he muttered
Lena instinctively went for his hand but suddenly drew back and winded her hands before her chest.
“I shouldn’t have done what?” she asked.
“You know, Lena.”
He fumbled for the bedside table and searched through the drawers. Sighing at the sight of a pack of stale smokes, he struck a match again the table’s legs. Lena’s mouth watered and her lungs burned when he pulled another stick from the box and lit the but
t with his flaming tip.
“Here.”
Jax passed her the cigarette without looking, and Lena hungrily accepted. She took a drag and let the smoke waft through the air as she faced him.
“I needed this,” she started. “Talk to me, Jax.”
The Silver Horses rumbled from behind the closed door, but Lena kept her eyes on Jax’s face as he smoked and looked at his feet.
“I need you to not think about it anymore,” he muttered.
As he stood, Lena smoked again as she watched his body push to the glass.
“But it happened, Jax,” she said softly. “Better that they know now and get the stakes.”
He formed a fist with his free hand and pounded his curled fingers in to the wall.
“They knew, Lena,” he said. “You shouldn’t have had to prove anything.”
She snatched his arm, her eyes watering as his cigarette hung between his lips. Lena took a final drag and stamped out her smoke as she rested her fingers to his cheeks.
“I lived it, Jax,” she said. “And I’m not ashamed anymore. Are you?”
His face softened, and she eased the cigarette away from his lips.
“Only of me,” he said. “And I don’t want to see you hurt like that ever again. Or even hear about it.”
Jax’s eyes grew damp, and she leaned down to pull on his smoke before stretching up to reach his lips.
“But I’m not hurt, Jax,” she insisted. “It almost feels like I giving up the ghost. Like it wasn’t my fault.”
The cigarette fell and smoldered as he took her into his arms.
“It wasn’t,” he said. “I tried to tell you that.”
“And I believed you then, Jax. I still believe you now.”
She kissed his lightly and guided him back to the bed. Together they sat softly on the edge of the mattress, and she brushed her fingers against his cheek.
“It all started when I could tell you,” she said. “And these crazy horses aside, I’m almost glad we’re here.”
Lena shifted into his lap and kissed his brow as she reached under his jacket and ran her fingers down his back.
“I want this to be okay for you, too,” she purred. “I want you to take your place, have your birthright.”
Their lips met and he started to push his hands under her skirt when his fingers trembled, and she followed his touch and pushed his hand close to her cunt.
“And I want to help you,” she said. “To just be with you. It’s… Jax…”
She moaned into his mouth when he held her back and peered into her eyes.
“Finish it,” he said. “What were you going to say?”
Lena smiled lightly and stroked his cheek.
“It’s all I’ve ever wanted. I’m okay with what happened before as long as this is where we are now.”
She moved to kiss him again when Jax held back and brushed a stray lock of blonde hair away from her eyes. His lips started to curl into a frown, and Lena strained forward to hold him when his entire body tensed.
“Jax, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” he finally said with a deep sigh. “It’s just… how can you do it?”
“How can I---?”
“How can you shake it off and still smile?”
Lena did just that now and grazed her nails against her cheek as she fell into his shoulder.
“Because I love you, Jax. And I know that I’m safe with you.”
Seizing hold on her hands, he reverently kissed her wrists.
“I want you more than that. I want you with me.”
Lena fell into his lips. His kiss started soft, gentle, and she held him closer as she pushed him back to the bed. She pulled the leather from his arms and raked her fingers against his muscles as she kissed his pecs and looked up at him through her hair.
“Then be with me. I want you now, Jax.”
Jax rested her body to the sheets and eased the clothes from her. Lena gave no resistance as he stripped her bare and kneaded her flesh. She offered herself freely as she eased his jeans from his thighs.
“You want me, too?” she asked.
He nodded and kissed her quickly as he settled inside and watched her groan at his impact.
“Okay, Lena?”
“Perfect, Jax. Just fine.”
“How can… were you always this strong?”
It took years of practice. Biting back the bullies and just resting in his arms, But Eric’s foul treatment turned her to a different place.
“Think Milo gets that I’m not scared?” Lena asked.
“Aren’t you?”
When she thought back on what Eric did and how he could still hurt her now, it was hard to lie. Eric terrified her to no end, but Jax was here now, and she pushed her arms around his neck.
“Sometimes,” she confessed. “But not right now. Not with you.”
Jax fell to his side and stroked her cheeks as he pressed her into the pillows.
“Don’t ever be afraid with me,” he soothed. “Even here… now…”
Lena silenced him with a kiss and spun him close as his cock started to poke between her thighs.
“That doesn’t scare me,” she whispered. “It only makes me want you more.”
Jax smiled into her lips and kissed her quickly. Taking her softly, Lena moaned as he pushed her deeper into the sheets. He kept her body uncovered as he caressed her skin and throbbed inside her. Lena grabbed his arms and kissed his face.
“Keep that up,” she said with a sly smile. “I want that, too.”
He mirrored her grin and curled to his back as he held her against her chest.
“Show me,” he said. “Show me how much.”
Lena stretched down to kiss him again, and he trailed as his fingers up and down her cheek. His eyes seemed to sparkle as she lowered her body, her cunt encasing his cock as she winded her fingers behind his back.
“I want you Jax. Please…”
His body stayed still, and Lena pushed into his cock as she found his hair and tugged gently. He smiled and nearly laughed around her pulls. She kept working her hands through his dark locks, and her hands fell as he seized towards her hips and cupped her ass.
“You amaze me,” he crooned. “And not just because you feel so…”
Lena stopped his speech short with a fresh kiss and held him to the bed as he arched his back and moved closer to her cunt. She opened her body to take all of him and scraped her fingers down his arms as she found his hands and clutched him closer.
“How do I feel, Jax?” she asked. “I know what this is to me. But what do you want---?”
“Only you,” he said. “With me. And safe.”
“Then make me both, Jax.”
Moving up to meet her mouth, he cradled her neck. His lips raced down her skin, stopping at her breasts to suckle her nipples. She moaned into his hair as he stayed firm and strong inside her, their eyes locking as he whispered into her ear.
“You are safe,” he promised her.
“Give me the rest, Jax,” she pleaded, her body quaking underneath him. “I need you to move.”
He turned his hips against hers, and Lena’s head fell back to the pillows, the throb of his cock sending her eyes rolling back in her head. She gripped his shoulders and drew him closer to her breasts. Jax’s lips played around her cheeks as he fondled her breasts, turning them over gently in his hard palms. The feel of his fingers made her moan, but despite the pounding of her heart, Lena’s world focused to the point of her pussy as he started to shift in and out of her, every plunge deeper than the last until his tip seemed to stretch to the corners of her heart. Not knowing how she would ever feel whole once he disentangled his flesh from hers, Lena summoned the strength to grab his face and peer at him through her bleary, anxious eyes.
“Jax, I’ll do anything to make this last,” she said in a weak voice.
“Good to know.”
“But if something happens to you… I…”
Lena groaned as his co
ck came to a pause again, and she wrapped her arms around his waist, savoring the vibrations of his flesh as his sides heaved against her trembling hands.
“I won’t let it, Lena,” he said the slight quiver in his tone filling her with fear when he cut off her thoughts.