“Is it because you’re ashamed?” Charley asked, a definite bite of impatience to her voice now, “Or because your boss told you to keep it shut?”
Bolton froze on the threshold of the bedroom. He turned and Charley realised that she may have overstepped the mark.
“What did you say?” Bolton asked, voice raised, nearly shouting, and he strode across the lounge and grabbed Charley’s arm, his grip tight, pulling her against him so their faces were inches apart. His face was contorted with anger, “What the fuck are you going on about?”
Charley twisted in his grip, worried now.
“Stop it,” she moaned, “You’re hurting me.”
“What have you heard?” Bolton asked, shouting now, not letting go of her arm. “What’s with the sudden interest in what I do?”
Charley was close to tears now, her arm stinging in his grip.
“I know what you do,” she whimpered.
“You know? How?” Bolton asked, taken aback. His grip loosened, and Charley pulled her arm out of his grasp and backed away, putting the sofa in between them, massaging her arm. Bolton moved towards her, but Charley stepped away, keeping the distance between them, and Bolton swallowed his annoyance. “Char, I’m sorry. Just talk to me.”
Charley gulped more wine and sniggered. Her bravado was returning now that she was out of Bolton’s clutches.
“Oh, you want to talk now, do you? Now you’re all worried about what I know,” she shook her head. She rocked on the balls of her feet. “You’re pathetic, you know that?”
Bolton’s patience dissolved and his hands curled into fists.
“Fucking tell me what you’ve heard,” he shouted.
“You’re a dealer, ain’t you?” Charley hissed, eyes narrowed. “Running all over the place, selling drugs and guns, whatever you’re boss tells you to do.”
Bolton was caught off guard.
“Who told you all this?”
Charley laughed hollowly.
“You’re not even going to bother to deny it then?”
Bolton ignored her jibe.
“Who told you?” he repeated, taking a deep breath to try and calm himself.
Charley considered him for a moment.
“Asher,” she replied.
“Your brother? How the fuck does he know?”
“What does it matter?” Charley snapped, her voice rising. Her indignation had reached breaking point. She was sick of being left out of the loop. “I want to know why he knew before I bloody did, when I’m the one who’s living with you. I’m the one who’s carrying your fucking baby.”
“Oh and don’t I know it,” Bolton shouted, throwing his fist into a wall in anger. “It’s all you ever bang on about, for fuck’s sake.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Ever since you told me we were having a baby, you’ve been on my back about it,” he replied, kicking the sofa. He knew that both of them had reached breaking point. “You want to know why I never told you about my job?”
“Come on, surprise me,” Charley jeered.
“I didn’t want you to feel guilty,” Bolton said. “If you didn’t want the big flat and the expensive furniture, I wouldn’t be doing any of this.”
“You’re blaming me? That’s a good one, I haven’t heard a joke that funny in a long while.”
Charley laughed, but it was forced. She gulped more wine, shaking her head and sneering at Bolton with distaste.
“You want to hear another one?” Bolton pressed on. “Everything I’ve done, I did for you and the only thanks I get are your barefaced cheek and nagging.”
“I didn’t want you to do any of this, how can you even stand there and say that?”
“Really? You’re the one who wanted this fucking apartment, not me.”
“I just didn’t want to be living with my mother when this baby is born,” Charley shrieked. “I wanted a place of our own, I didn’t care how big it was. Not once did I tell you to go out and do any of this.”
“Sure, and if I hadn’t, how long would it have been before you started complaining?”
Both of them were shouting now, their voices reverberating around the room.
“I’m pregnant, what the hell do you expect me to do? Sit around and wait for money to fall from the sky? I wanted you to get a job, not become a fucking criminal.”
“Well, you got what you wanted so what’s the problem?” Bolton said, stepping around the couch, Charley mirroring his movements, so they were circling each other like animals. “You’ve got money now, the life you’ve always dreamed of –”
“Hah, the life I’ve dreamed of? My boyfriend’s never home because he’s too busy licking a gangster’s arse, whilst I’m stuck here by myself, doing fuck all –”
“Don’t give me all that shit,” Bolton laughed, eyes flashing.
Charley drained her glass and threw it across the room. Bolton dodged it and the glass shattered against the far wall.
“Sorry for wanting to spend time with the guy I love,” she shouted, “If you don’t want me, you know what you can do? Find someone else to shag”
Bolton sniggered. His anger was making him irrational, and he knew what would hurt her the most right now. And that was what he wanted. To hurt her.
“Sweetheart, I already did,” he said, his voice cold. “And you know what? She didn’t give me fucking aggro like this.”
Charley had stopped and her shoulders slumped, taking in his words.
“You bastard, I knew you were shagging around,” she cried.
“Knew did you?” Bolton snorted. “Because you know everything, right?”
“I know you’re a complete twat,” Charley screamed. They were just feet apart, and Charley lunged forward, catching him off guard, slapping and scratching every part of him she could.
He was shouting, trying to grab her hands to stop the attack, but Charley’s rage gave her strength and a nail caught his eyebrow, and Bolton felt his skin tear and blood dripped into his eye. He caught her hand and Charley shrieked, he knew he was squeezing her wrist too hard. Charley brought her other fist up and it connected with his jaw.
He threw her from him and Charley fell to the floor, shaking with dry sobs and anger, and she was panting, trying to catch her breath. Bolton massaged his jaw and wiped the blood from his eyebrow. It wasn’t a deep cut, but it stung nonetheless.
Seeing Charley on the floor, he knelt down to help her up, but Charley slapped his hands away, eyeing him with disgust.
“Don’t touch me.”
“Listen, I’m sorry,” Bolton said, his voice quiet, as Charley struggled to get back on her feet. “I was out of order.”
“Too fucking right you were,” Charley snapped. She eyed the sofa, but remained standing, watching Bolton through narrowed eyes.
“It’s all over now, I promise,” Bolton said. “I never loved her.”
“I don’t care,” Charley sighed. She wiped tears from her eyes. “You never loved me either.”
Bolton groaned, stepping forward, but Charley held up a hand to keep at a distance.
“Don’t say that, I love you more than anything,” he said earnestly.
Charley shook her head.
“If you loved me, you wouldn’t have fucked someone else.”
The bitterness in her voice broke Bolton’s heart.
“It was a mistake,” he insisted.
“Don’t lie to me, I’m not some stupid whore.”
Bolton sighed. He was running out of things to say.
“I’m sorry, you’ve got to believe me.”
Charley’s lip curled back in disbelief.
“I don’t have to believe anything you say,” she retorted.
Bolton felt his frustration rising and gritted his teeth, trying to calm himself. The last thing he needed was to lose his temper again. Charley, seeing his internal struggle, snorted. Bolton glared at her.
“You think I don’t love you?” he said, voice raised. He was pissed o
ff that after everything he had done, she had the cheek to stand before him and think he didn’t love her. It was grating on him. “Why the fuck do you think I’ve been slaving my butt off working for a psycho for a half a year?”
“That doesn’t prove anything.”
Charley’s voice was flat, emotionless. Bolton clenched his fist, swallowing anger.
“You serious?”
“How does you selling drugs prove you love me?” Charley asked, raising her hands in question. “To me, it proves nothing.”
“I wanted to give you and our baby the best life possible,” Bolton said. “You think I ain’t made sacrifices? You think my work’s been a fucking walk in the park, do you?”
“Don’t even try and make me feel bad about this,” Charley groaned, turning her back on him. It was the final straw for Bolton.
“I’ve fucking killed for you,” he shouted, before he could stop himself.
The silence crashed against his ears. Charley spun around, aghast.
“What did you say?” she asked, though they both knew she had heard his words.
Bolton sighed, and collapsed onto the couch.
“I fucking killed a man for you,” he said, tears leaking from his eyes. The guilt poured from him, his body shaking. “Last night”
“No, you can’t have,” Charley stammered, frozen to the spot, watching him with disbelief. Her mind reeled, wishing he was lying, but she knew that he was telling the truth. “Oh my God, how could you?”
“I did it for us,” Bolton said, head in his hands, his spirit broken. “For us and the baby.”
“Don’t say that,” Charley said, backing away from him until her back pressed against the wall, eyeing him with mounting horror. Her heart was hammering.
“I didn’t have a choice,” Bolton said, lifting his head, tears streaming down his face.
“Everyone has a choice,” Charley said, her voice almost a whisper. Bolton shook his head, rising to his feet and coming towards her. He looked defeated, but Charley threw out her hands, eyes wide. “Don’t come near me.”
Bolton stopped in his tracks, wiping at his eyes.
“Please, Char,” he pleaded. “You’ve got to believe that I did what I had to do for us, for the future –”
“Just stop talking, I can’t hear this.”
Charley threw her hands over her ears, trying to block out his words. She wished she could go back in time, take back tonight, forget everything, but she knew life didn’t work like that.
“You’ve got to,” Bolton said, stepping forward and clasping her hands in his, moving them away from her ears, his voice gentle and desperate. “You’ve got to understand –”
“I’ll never understand,” Charley said, pulling out of his grasp and sidestepping him, crossing the room. She was close to tears again, her voice shook. “I’ll never understand how you could kill someone and tell me you did it for us, for our baby.”
“But I did, you’ve got to –”
“I don’t have to do anything, except get away from you.”
Charley’s words were quiet but Bolton heard them as if they had been screamed at him. His heart broke. He stepped forward, eyes begging.
“Please,” he spluttered, choking on his emotion, “Don’t do this.”
Charley looked into his face and wondered how everything had gotten so fucked up.
“I can’t bear to look at you,” she whispered, tears spilling from her own eyes now.
“Char, babe –”
Bolton made to hold her, as if by touching her, holding her close, he could change her mind, take back what he had told her.
Charley shook her head sadly. The fight had left her now. Tiredness and shock were overwhelming her, as if a physical weight pressing down on her chest and shoulders.
“Leave me alone,” Charley said.
Her words were soft, contained no trace of anger, but Bolton knew the force with which she meant them. His shoulders slumped. He let her slip past him into the bedroom.
Charley sat on the bed. The bed she had shared with Bolton these past few months, and wondered how she could have misjudged her relationship in so many ways. She considered leaving but there was nowhere she could go at this time of night.
She lay back against the pillows and her eyes closed, as she gave in to sleep.
In the lounge, Bolton sat on the sofa, his mind going over what had happened. He wished he could take it all back, but he knew that things would never be the same again. She could never forget what he had done, and she would never forgive him either. Bolton knew that much and it hurt him like a physical pain.
He crept to the bedroom door and looked at Charley, her face a picture of beauty, the baby bump pressing against the silk top she wore. The image brought home to him how much he had lost tonight and how majorly he had fucked up.
He took a last glance at her and left the flat. He knew that Charley needed to be by herself and would not want to see him.
Only when he had gone downstairs and out into the street did he let out a howl of misery.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Charley sat down heavily on her bed and groaned as she massaged her ankles, kicking off her slippers. She heard muffled voices from the kitchen and closed her eyes. She had not expected to be living back at home, especially with two weeks to go before her due date, but as her mother kept telling her, life did not always work out as you wanted it to.
It had been weeks since the bust-up with Bolton and she had heard from him only once. He had phoned her to let her know he was sorry for the heartache that he had caused her, and that he would not contact her again. The call had given her a lot to think about and she was beginning to wonder if she had acted too hastily.
When she had woken up after the argument, she had packed her things up and called Asher. He had driven her back to mother’s flat and helped her unload the car. Toni had been shocked to see her eldest daughter back and had made a big fuss about deciding whether or not she could move back in, but had eventually relented when Charley had suggested she could always stay with Asher. Asher had scarpered before Toni had come downstairs, and Charley had been left to haul her belongings upstairs to the flat herself, sweating and cursing all the way.
The call from Bolton had come a few days after she had returned home, and Charley guessed that he had wanted to give her a chance to calm down after the argument before contacting her. It had been a wise move, in her opinion. It had taken her days to forget the heated exchange and she still felt a little nauseous every time she thought about it, about Bolton’s betrayals and the fact that he had blamed her for what he had done. Despite her anger and hurt, she had been pleased to hear Bolton’s voice and had been left upset after he had told her he would not contact her again.
She had tried to call him since, wanting to talk to him and discuss their future. After all, in fourteen days she would be giving birth to their child, and that meant that whatever had happened they needed to discuss things. Bolton had not answered, and Charley had felt frustrated.
Her frustration mounted due to the fact that she was now living back under her mother’s roof, and Toni’s shock at having her back had quickly been replaced by a smug attitude that clearly told Charley that Toni had been right all along. Her attitude, annoying in itself, was also a constant reminder that Charley was alone, unsupported, and expecting a baby. The thought depressed her.
The bedroom door opened and Torey sauntered in. She glanced at Charley and frowned, as she often did since Charley had moved back into the bedroom.
“Can’t you give it a rest?” Charley asked, impatient. Her feet were aching and she was getting heartburn more frequently than she had done a few months ago. “I’m sorry you don’t get your own room anymore, but I needed somewhere to crash.”
“I’m not even bothered about that,” Torey shrugged, sitting down at her dressing table and doing her make-up. “Just as long as I don’t have to share with you and the baby.”
Charley did
n’t answer. She tried not to think about the living arrangements for when the baby had arrived. The thought made her anxious, and that made her heartburn worse.
“You off out tonight?” Charley asked, changing the subject and rubbing her chest, although she knew it wouldn’t ease the burn. “Meeting up with that Devon?”
Torey glared at her through the mirror.
“Sorry if I hit a nerve. Things not working out with him then?”
Charley tried to keep her voice casual, but Torey frowned.
“Just fucking drop it, I know you’re only nosing about in my business because you’re too depressed to deal with your own shit,” Torey said, applying her lipstick. “If you want some gossip, I’ve got some about Bolton that’ll really interest you.”
Charley sat up straighter, narrowing her eyes. She knew her sister was lashing out at her, but her curiosity was aroused. Torey watched her, a smile flickering on her lips. Charley knew that her sister had gotten what she wanted – a reaction.
“You not interested in that bit of gossip then?” Torey pressed, looking over her shoulder at Charley, raising her eyebrow. “It’s just, if it was me, I’d want to know.”
“Well, I’m not you, thank God.”
Torey sniggered.
“Amen to that.”
Charley watched her sister resume her preening and sighed. She wanted to know what gossip she had on Bolton, but reassured herself that her sister had probably made it up, just to get a reaction out of her. She wouldn’t rise to the bait. She had enough on her plate without playing stupid mind games with her younger sister.
Torey finished doing her make-up and got to her feet. She looked down at her sister, looking supremely disdainful.
“For your information, things are going fine with Devon,” she said loftily, hand on hip and lips pouting. “And that news about Bolton? He’s got a new girlfriend, so I guess you can forget all about playing happy little families.”
With that, she strutted from the room. Raised voices started up, and Charley could guess that Toni was trying to stop Torey from going out. She ignored them, still taken aback from the bombshell.
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