by R. Rodriguez
And so I kept crushing on him from afar, for too long, it seemed. I still remember his first word to me. It was literally a word.
The annual Talent Showcase came around. It was two months before graduation, for him anyway. It was one of the closing events of the year on campus. It was the time for the music students to outdo themselves. I already had the after party covered. A senior that had suddenly struck a friendship with Laura invited her to the after party. Unfortunately, Laura couldn’t be his date because she was dating Stan, another soccer player at school, so she set me up with him instead. I had yet to meet the loser who had to ask a stranger to a party in person, but I knew he was also new on campus and Laura assured that he wasn’t that bad.
Despite continuing my obsession with watching Dario’s every move, and bumping into him accidently, I began to concentrate my efforts on my performance for the Talent Showcase. This was yet another chance for me to shine. Soon, junior year would be over, and I’d be one step further in the pecking order so that I could get serious about my cello.
“How many times are you going to practice your part?” Laura asked, flustered.
“As many as it takes, Laur…” I said, arranging my cello between my black tights to start my routine from the get go. “The auditions are in two days. I have to fit into the symphony perfectly.”
“You’ve made the showcase every year and you got a solo in the Winter Musical last semester,” Laura reminded me. “You’re in.”
“That’s because I take it very seriously and I always give my best.” I walked over to the radio, hit the play button and ran to my spot to start my routine.
Laura sighed and took a seat at a corner of the empty rehearsal room I was using. She knew that I was a maniac when it came to achieving a task I set my mind on. I was half way through my song, when a tall scrawny boy walked in. I was tempted to stop, but since I saw Laura stand up to greet him, I continued with my rehearsal.
When I was done, Laura quickly introduced me to her friend.
“This is Luke.” I remember acknowledging him briefly and deciding to cut my rehearsal short. I was a bit annoyed. I was so focused on nailing my audition for the showcase that the interruption bothered me.
Laura was right. He wasn’t half bad. He was nice. He wasn’t that bad looking either, just not built yet for our age. Well, I just wanted to go to the after party, so I exchanged numbers with him and agreed to accompany him on that night.
The day of the audition came and I applied the last touches of make-up. My outfit was perfect and my act was down pat. I waited outside the concert hall where my mentor, Professor Mason, was writing down our names and the order of our performances.
Auditions for events on campus weren’t exactly closed. I mean, after the acts were accounted for, which was what Professor Mason had just done, everyone who wanted to watch it, filed into the concert hall and actually got to watch everybody else’s audition. Well, the people who came before you anyway. After you auditioned, you were free to go.
“Are you ready?” Laura gushed excitedly.
I thought I was, but then I noticed who Professor Mason was signing up. As in high school, the jocks’ dynasty transferred into college life. Only, they were part of a more elite clique now. The sports stars and the cheerleaders always did a skit at the Talent Showcase. This was the one time when all majors got combined into one event. I didn’t even know why they auditioned. My stomach fluttered as I saw Dario geared up as David Beckham, complete with a Posh look- alike hanging onto his arm.
It was Melody Coone. I knew her. Everybody knew her. She was known to rile up a bit more than just games, off the playing field, that is. Despite her reputation, she was one of the power players and when she offered me a smile, I offered one right back. I wanted nothing but to ignore her since she was hanging on my crush’s arm. I turned my attention to Laura, and there behind her was my smiling scrawny date. I had seen quite a lot of him lately. He had a knack for just showing up.
“Ready as I’ll ever be,” I finally responded to Laura’s initial question.
“You look great!” Luke began to offer in reassurance only to be cut off by Posh herself as her group passed us.
“Gracie!!! You look awesome!”
Ugh. Did she have to call me by my high school nickname? She didn’t even know me, then. I wasn’t sure, but I thought I sensed a small gleam of coldness in her eyes.
“Thanx.” I regaled her with a brand new and most dazzling smile, despite feeling that her compliment was not all too sincere, ignoring my future date’s most sincere one.
Melody almost dragged Dario to the back of the line. My eyes couldn’t peel off the number 23 on his multicolored soccer jersey. Dario offered me a slight glance and turned his attention back to his friends. His nonchalance irritated me. I straightened my back even more and tipped up my chin in defiance.
“Bump him,” I almost said aloud. “Who does he think he is?” With this new attitude, I marched into the hall. If there was one thing that I loved and knew that I was good at, it was performing. I obliterated any frustration from my mind and strolled purposefully into the room. Laura gave me thumbs- up and Luke offered me the customary “Break a Leg” wish.
The participants settled in the first six rows of the left section of the concert hall. I was fifth in line to perform.
“Grace Elizabeth Coventry.” Professor Mason summoned me by my full name. It sounded so official. I felt a bit of a flutter in the pit of my stomach. I promptly took my place on stage. I turned on the head mic and looked out into the audience. I saw the group of judges sitting in the first center row of the auditorium. Some of the judges were students. Others were unknown people that were surely experts in the arts. The last judge was Professor Mason herself. And then I saw Lucian. His sandy brown hair shining under the concert hall’s lights. His encouraging, proud smile inundating me with a sense of assurance. He hadn’t forgotten.
As the track started, I put my best Jacqueline Dupree stage face on and plunged into my performance whole heartedly. I performed every stroke with force and hit every note.
And to think my mother thought I had been taking Mandarin lessons every evening. My dad didn’t have the guts to contradict her and we indulged her, but I also indulged my natural talent to play an instrument after the boring Mandarin lessons.
I gave all of my energy to my performance and I couldn’t help but to smile when I landed the last forceful note on the stage as the music ended. I knew I had nailed it, which was confirmed by the full blown whistling and shouting in the audience.
“Thank you,” I breathed into the microphone and stepped off the stage swiftly so the next act could climb up.
I began my exit through the center aisle of hall when I heard Dario’s unforgettable voice.
“Sexy.” he uttered the single husky word that froze my heart. Ignoring the silent figure that followed my exit, his eyes smoldered my insides as they locked with mine. A silent message of acknowledgement passed between us and then I walked out into the lighted hallway.
“They’re texting about you! You’re in,” Laura exclaimed.
“I still have to wait until tomorrow to see the official list, Laur…” I said. “Let me go change and I’ll be right out.”
“Lucian. I’ll be right out. I hope you enjoyed my performance,” I said sincerely.
“Did you have any doubt, you’d be in, Grace?” he said, standing confidently with his hands in his pockets.
I deliberately took a long time changing. I took off my sober bone white dress and stuffed it into my back pack. I pulled a white sweater over my head and stepped into dark blue skinny jeans. I pulled up my brown leather boots a matching belt and white wool hat. Next, I washed my face and slowly combed down my hair with my fingers. I couldn’t arrange a pony tail with all the hairspray. Last, I applied a fresh coat of light make- up.
Satisfied with the results, I left the bathroom to meet Lucian and Laura, wishing that the jocks were done with thei
r audition so that I could see Dario again. I wanted to hear his beautiful husky voice again.
“Hey,” Luke popped up from behind Laura yet again. I suddenly felt annoyed that he was in my face once more when I had so many more important things to do like flirt with Dario. That was all that filled my head at the moment. I strained my eyes in Laura’s direction as soon as the guy was distracted by the surging kids from the auditorium to see if she got the hint that I was into something, but she didn’t budge. She kept busy texting and receiving texts about the rest of the auditions.
“The jocks just finished. Spectacular as ever…Of course,” she reported.
“So…” Luke started to talk but honestly all I heard were words jumbled together because Dario and crew were seeping out into the hallway. My eyes were riveted on him. I even forgot Lucian was waiting to be acknowledged, as well. My heart started its rhythmic dance once more at the sight of Dario. He looked over at me.
I pretended to listen to my future date and even managed to answer a few questions, but every hair on my body was expectant of Dario’s next move. Then, disappointment filled my body just as much as the excitement of his acknowledgement had. There was no move from his part. In fact, it was as if I wasn’t even there.
Dario kept talking and fooling around with his friends, particularly fooling around with Melody. She was still linked to his arm like she had taken possession of him. The audition is already over!!! I screamed in my head.
My future date seemed to read my changing mood because he quieted.
“Excuse me. We have to go,” I muttered suddenly. Luke stepped up again and offered me his outstretched hand, but quickly retrieved it when he realized I was walking towards older, more accomplished looking Lucian.
The kids from the other group seemed to notice the exchange because soon enough Chad Peters, the most popular soccer star on campus, aside from Dario, of course, decided to badger Luke.
“Hey, hey, hey. Look who we have here.” They all seemed to take notice of my future date.
“Shooting a little high, aren’t you?” Chad teased Luke.
Luke in turn, kept his distance from me as if to save appearances. I didn’t get the feeling that he was doing it for himself. It was more for my sake. The group started to become rowdy as they laughed at him. Everyone around started to notice the scene and I was mortified to see Dario staring at us curiously. He wasn’t really saying anything, but he wore a silent reproachful smirk on his face. Laura came to join us at that point.
“Are you two dating?” I finally heard more than two words from Dario.
I was stunned. He was definitely interested. I had no idea how to answer. If told about the after party, my chances with Dario would be over and if I denied having any connection to the kid, I would probably hurt his feelings and although I was on the trail to attaining my crush’s attention, being mean to others was not one of the attention grabbing traits that I was striving for.
My date stepped up to plate again, though. He seemed confident and assured as he answered Dario’s question. If only he was a bit more muscular, like Lucian. I thought.
“No. We’re just friends.” He didn’t flinch with his answer.
Dario didn’t answer him. He simply stared at me with a meaningful look in his eyes. Anger started brewing inside me. It was as if he was staking a claim on me when he hadn’t even spoken two words to me before today.
“Good God. I hope not, Gracie. You could do so much better than that,” Melody chimed in. “I mean he’s cute and all, but he’s so…”
She never finished her sentence.
The other kids chuckled, including Dario this time.
My cheeks flamed with anger. I saw Luke standing his ground. He didn’t seem bothered by the attacks. I sensed that he was more mature then the rest of us. Laura, however, was beet red. She was obviously uncomfortable with the whole situation and embarrassed.
Somewhere inside, I understood that it was better to stay quiet than to ignite the taunts any more, but my mouth just couldn’t stay shut. The response I would’ve liked to have given didn’t come out of it, though. Dario was acting like a jerk and I really didn’t dig jerks but there was some connection between us that I couldn’t shake. What the connection might me…? I had no idea. It was most likely his good looks and hot body. When had I become so shallow?
I decided to give him a neutral statement.
“It’s none of your business what we are,” I stated. I directed my retort at Dario. I grabbed my future date’s hand and pulled him toward the exit doors.
“Come on, Laura.” I rolled my pretty green eyes dramatically, swayed my hair to one side and paraded out of there.
“And for the record… Just give him a couple of years and you’ll see that he’s probably gonna be more than just cute. It’s usually like that when they’re cute, intelligent and nice,” I added.
Lucian just stood by and watched the whole scene unfold. He wasn’t an outsider looking into my life, but as my friend, he did respect my space. I didn’t notice the hard menacing look he had given Dario and his darkening mood as he drove Laura and me home and bid goodnight.
I was riding high on my Jacqueline Dupree impersonating success as I said those words and as soon as I got home, I had no idea why I had done that. But it felt good.
And that’s how it started.
Chapter 6: A Foot in the Door
Luke wasn’t scared away by the ordeal. He took me to the Talent Showcase After Party just as we’d planned. He was a good date and everything, but there just weren’t any sparks between us.
As I lay in bed after the blessed event, I realized that I’d actually had a great time. I spent most of the night dancing, but my eyes hardly peeled off Dario and his date. He was like a magnet that drew me to him. He didn’t seem so oblivious to my presence, either. I was dancing at one point with Luke, Laura, and Stan when I spotted him dancing with Melanie directly behind my date.
His eyes didn’t leave mine for a second. He met me stare for stare, but he never once approached me. It was clear what he expected. He expected me to be all over him, as every other girl was on campus. But Dario was in for a surprise because he didn’t know that I wasn’t so easily seduced by mere stares— even if they came from him. After a while, he grew bored and directed his full attention towards Melanie.
I decided that I would be the one ignoring Dario from now on. He was much too conceited and self important for my taste. I almost put him out of my mind, but I didn’t count on his persistence and his next move. Besides, I had a real and genuine, complete package of a man to turn to who filled my needs, albeit some needs. Lucian. He was always in my thoughts, too. I decided to call him up.
He picked up after a few rings. I hoped I wasn’t disturbing his sleep. I knew he had to work early the next morning.
“Hi, sweetheart.” His hoarse sleepy voice struck a chord in my insides. I almost confused him for Dario for a second, but I quickly put into perspective who I was talking to. “Did you have a good time tonight?”
“I must admit, I did.” I stifled a yawn. I guess I was more tired than I thought.
“What was that all about with that guy from the other day?” His tone sounded like he was trying not to seem too interested, but I knew Lucian always had a torrent of worry about me in a little corner of his mind.
“Who, Dario?” I knew who he was talking about, of course.
“Whatever his name is. The brooding, Max Steel wannabe,” he declared.
I had to admit my inclinations for Dario to Lucian. He was my best friend. I had no reason to hide anything from him. It just seemed weird because I had been so busy putting my life together for the last two years and a half that I had ruled guys out of my system. This was the first crush I even had to discuss with Lucian.
“I’m sort of into him. It’s nothing really.” I brushed it off.
“It didn’t seem like nothing to me, Grace. Just-- be careful, promise?” Lucian said in a very big brotherly ma
nner.
“Don’t worry about it, Lucian.” I sank deeper into my comforter.
“Was he there?” he questioned.
“Yeah, he was.” I decided to omit the fact that I had decided to ignore him and changed the subject, completely.
“Anyway, I just called to say goodnight. And… thanks for always being there for me. I deeply appreciate it.”
Lucian had shown up for my performance at the real show with a massive bouquet of exotic flowers, and driven us to the after party.
“No need to thank me. I care about you, Grace,” he said. “Go rest now, party girl. You probably need it.”
I conceded that it was so true and bid a good night.
The Dario incident was all but forgotten. It was a very productive time in my life, when dreams of the deathly panther had all but disappeared. I couldn’t have foreseen the wretchedness that would come to my life. On an especially cold April night, Laura called me while I was having dinner with Lucian with unexpected news. Lucian, of course, was an important person in my life. We saw each other at least twice a week to catch up on everything that was going on in our lives. He was just telling me about his new project when Laura interrupted me.
“There’s a bunch of guys here visiting Stan,” Laura announced. Stan was Laura’s boyfriend who practically lived with us. He spent every waking hour in our newly acquired apartment.
“Yeah, who’s there?” I asked as I munched on my crisp salad.
“Well, let’s see. There’s Chad Peters, Conner Burlington, Mike Stevens, and there’s someone else who wants to talk to you…” Laura’s voice trailed off as she handed the phone to the unnamed visitor.
“Hey sexy.” His husky enthralling voice soaked my senses and I almost choked on my Caesar salad and dropped the phone all at the same time. I swallowed quickly and shook my free hand in an effort to compose myself enough to utter a sound.
“Hi, who’s this?” Like I didn’t know. I pretended to be in the dark about his identity.