by LJ Bradley
Only the truth
LJ Bradley
Copyright © 2018 LJ Bradley
All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
Table of Contents
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
To my husband, my mum, my mother-in-law, and Gerry,
Thank you for pushing me, supporting me, and making me feel like I’m doing exactly what I’m supposed to be doing. It always makes me happy (and nervous!) being able to share my work, especially with you. x
CHAPTER ONE
Sadie
“Sadie! Saaaddiiee giiirrrl.” My older sister’s friend, Hannah, tottered into the kitchen on high heels that were now officially a safety hazard. She tugged the bodice of her strapless dress a smidge higher then leaned in close enough that the concept of personal space went right out the window. “Watcha doin’?” She followed my line of sight and made a little hum of approval when she discovered what had caught my attention. “Checkin’ out the resident hottie. Nice.”
The ends of her blonde bob brushed against my cheek, her warm breath hinting of Sambuca and… was that crab dip? “Hmm. Maybe.” I gave her a smile then went back to admiring the man in question. Mason Blackwood; one-time crush of my teens, current starring role in all my adult fantasies. I’d never mentioned my attraction to him to anyone before, so until now I’d been able to enjoy my obsession in private. I just hoped Hannah was drunk enough she wouldn’t remember our conversation tomorrow.
“Can’t say I blame you.” She wrapped her hands around my upper arm and swayed against me. “You know what they say about him, right?”
“Yes, yes I do.” Conversations about guy parts tended to catch my attention, and his had become so talked about these days it now had a personality all its own. Funnily enough, it didn’t even make the list of things that interested me most about him. “Pretty sure everyone’s heard the rumours, Han.”
“Big dick,” she said, carrying on as if I hadn’t said a word. “Huge—and mooore than happy to share it with anyone who wants a piece of that sweet fucking man cake.”
I snorted and shot her a look, ignoring the unintentional sting her words caused. He wasn’t mine. I had no reason to be upset about the attention he got from other women. If my heart could get on board with that idea and stop flip-flopping around in my chest whenever I heard his name, I’d be fine. “You think maybe you should have another drink?”
We were celebrating my sister Claire’s twenty-eighth birthday in the home she shared on the outskirts of Melbourne with Mason and her fiancé, Andy. Three hours into the party I had the distinct impression everyone was hammered but me. I had the tendency for oversharing whenever I had more than a couple of drinks, and I just couldn’t risk it around Mason anymore. My feelings for him had reached the point now where they’d come flowing out if I so much as sniffed a glass of wine.
“Nah.” Hannah waved away my suggestion with a smile, like there was even the slightest chance I was serious. “I’ve drunken—dranken—shit. The bottle’s all gone, is what I’m trying to say.”
“That sucks.”
“Speaking of sucking. Five minutes alone with that beautiful bastard—that’s all I’d need.”
O-kay.
Mason had been a part of my life since he and Claire became best friends back when they were ten years old. Up until my late teens I’d mostly looked up to him in a harmless, hero-worship kind of way, in awe over his confidence, humour, and the way he seemed so completely at ease with himself. I’d never been shy when it came to letting him know about it either.
When those feelings turned into something more intense and more… adult, the change must have been so subtle it went straight over his head, because he still treated me like… I don’t know. Like he had no clue one touch from him could make my skin tingle, or that when he hugged me my whole world felt like a better, calmer, safer place.
A while ago I would have laughed at a comment like Hannah’s, but now I’d joined the ranks of women who lusted after the hot guy all it did was remind me of my competition. Kind of disheartening since the rest of the women in his social circle were a lot more mature, experienced, and completely in the know about how to keep a man like him happy.
What chance did I have as a twenty-one-year-old whose familiarity with men went as far as kissing and some minor groping?
I sighed and squeezed Hannah’s hand while we took in the show. Mason stood among a cluster of women in a cleared area of the living room, flinging his arms around in that unique way of his that never failed to bring a smile to my face. His dancing style made him look like a hot, sexy idiot, and the fact that he didn’t give a shit only increased his appeal. His dark hair was dishevelled, his blue eyes bright and full of life. A day’s worth of stubble shadowed his jaw, and his fitted charcoal t-shirt showed off the kind of muscles that made me wish for five minutes alone with him, too.
“So, you haven’t… gone there yet?” I asked, feigning disinterest while I secretly pleaded with her to say no.
“Me?” Hannah laughed. “Oh, no. Nonononono.”
I frowned. She clearly liked him and he’d developed a reputation for being a man-whore. Sleeping with each other should have been a natural progression. “Why not?”
“Oh, I tried. Don’t get me wrong. I threw myself at him… told him straight out I wanted in his pants, but…” She stared off into the distance and swallowed hard. Her eyes watered and her grip on my arm grew stronger.
Oh, God. Was she crying? In addition to the stories doing the rounds Mason had always been known as a laid-back charmer. One of those types who was a natural with all kinds of people. I couldn’t imagine him doing anything that might upset someone, at least not on purpose. “What happened?” Please don’t let it be something that makes me see him in a different light.
“He… he turned me down.”
She swallowed again, and her eyes welled until tears threatened to fall. I glanced around the room then back at her, unsure how to handle the situation. Nobody liked being rejected, but her reaction seemed a little over the top. “Are you all right?”
“Yeah.” She pulled in a deep breath. “I just… I think I’m gonna hurl.”
Oh, crap. “I thought you were crying about Mason!” I slid my arm around her waist and pulled her against me.
“No, not crying. More like… purging. On your shoes, maybe.” She looked down at my black peep-toe heels, pointing at them like she wasn’t sure I knew they were there. “Pretty shoes.”
With a choking sound—a little amused, a lot horrified—my hold on her turned vice-like and I checked to make sure we had a clear run to the bathroom. “C’mon. Let’s get you out of here.”
“Okay.” Hannah leaned on me and let me do most of the work. We managed to cross the room without any major hold ups, rounding the corner to the relative quiet of the hallway in no time. With no one else around and the bathroom door hanging open, it looked like we were in luck and wouldn’t need to wait.
“You’re awesome, Sadie-girl,” she said as she stumbled and sent me lurching toward the wall. “I think I might be in love with you.”
I righted my footing and kept a firm hold on her, hoping like hell neither of us would end the night with any injuries. “Yeah, yeah. Why don’t we see how you feel about that tomorrow?”
She laughed, but then a beat later her humour died. The sound that came next could have been a hiccup or the beginning
of something so much worse. Dread washed over me as I shoved her through the door and rushed her to the toilet. Then she dropped to her knees, hugged the bowl and let out a god almighty roar that made the tiny hairs rise on my forearms. With my hands pressing her chin-length hair to the sides of her head, I closed my eyes and sighed. If I thought Sambuca and crab dip had made a bad combination earlier…
I had no idea why I’d bothered trying to put myself on Mason’s radar tonight. While he was out there having the time of his life surrounded by his harem, I stood here playing nursemaid in the dress I’d specifically chosen for him—a little red number that did a pretty great job of showing off my legs while it took the focus from my less than impressive breasts. My dark hair flowed freely to the middle of my back, and I’d even put on makeup to highlight the grey in my eyes. Makeup.
Other than throwing myself at him naked it looked like I’d have to come to terms with the fact that he didn’t see me in that way and probably never would.
Such a depressing thought. Even more so given my current circumstances.
I opened my eyes to check on the patient. “You doing okay there?”
“Not done yet.”
Oh, God. Some things just couldn’t be unseen. My eyes drifted closed again, and minutes dragged by like hours until I finally heard a burp echo in the toilet bowl. The sigh that followed filled me with relief. I let go of Hannah’s hair and rubbed her back in slow circles. “All finished now?”
“Yeah.” She swallowed and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. “I’m done.”
I helped her up from the floor and whipped a couple of tissues from the box on the vanity, handing them to her while I tugged the bodice of her dress into place. It was obvious she’d hit the wall now and wouldn’t be diving back into the fun tonight. I didn’t see any point in convincing her otherwise. “Want me to organise a ride home or would you rather stay here?”
Claire and Andy shared one of the bedrooms while Mason occupied another. The third had been set up as a guest room with a big, comfy bed I’d spent more than a couple of nights in. Friends often stayed over so I didn’t feel the need to clear it with Claire first. Plus, she owed me one now.
“You’re a good girl, Sadie.” Hannah avoided eye contact with me and gave my arm an awkward pat. All the love she’d been feeling earlier had apparently faded in the face of her misery. “A ride would be great. I just wanna go home.”
Oh, how I understood that feeling.
“Sadie!”
That made twice now someone had called out my name, except this time around the voice was deep and masculine. No signs of slurring either.
I’d just come back inside after helping Hannah into a cab, but I didn’t need time to adjust to the noise and chaos around me to figure out which direction the voice had come from. My gaze zeroed in on Mason and my heart gave a happy little thump.
He stood in the main part of the living room bordered by two beige couches set in an L formation. A muted football game played on the big screen behind him and the coffee table had been shifted off to one side to make room for the crowd. Half a dozen girls and a few guys filled the space, most of them either dancing or getting to know one another really well.
Mason didn’t appear to notice any of the activity. His eyes held mine and he extended his hand in my direction, inviting me to dance without saying a word. When his fingers wiggled in encouragement the urge came over me to run to him. Not in slow motion like they did in the movies either, more like one of those flat-out sprints where our bodies collided and he had to wrap his arms around me to make sure I didn’t send us both flying. Maybe grab my ass for balance, too.
I smiled and shook my head, not wanting to look too eager.
He raised his brows and waited.
A laugh burst from me and I shook my head again. Always with the teasing and trying to draw out my playful side. I didn’t know if he enjoyed the verbal sparring or the novelty of being around a woman who refused to fawn all over him. Either way, it meant getting the chance to spend some one-on-one time with him and earn those deep, rumbling laughs of his that always made my stomach flip with pleasure.
“Don’t make me come over there,” he called out. “We both know how that’ll end.”
He’d toss me over his shoulder like a caveman and take me there himself. Just the thought tempted me to stand my ground and test him, see if he’d follow through on his threat in a room full of people. Instead I gave in and made my way across the room, taking my time about it so he wouldn’t be too pleased with himself.
His attention never wavered from my face as I approached. No sneaky peeks to check out the goods, no wandering gaze like he’d forgotten where my eyes were located. He merely looked at me with that charismatic half smile of his, like he had no idea I’d made all this effort just for him.
I couldn’t understand why it didn’t bother me, why I wasn’t desperate for him to notice the changes I’d made to my appearance. Even now with the dress and the hair and the makeup, I still couldn’t get him to see me.
And then it hit me.
I came to a stop in front of him and the force of the realisation stole my breath.
He’d always seen me.
Maybe not in the way I wanted or wished for these days, but he’d never once left me feeling ignored or overlooked.
I pulled in a shuddering breath and fought back the surge of emotion. My arms wanted to slide around his neck to the place where they always felt most at home. My lips wanted to press to his cheek to soak up his warmth. It took all my willpower to keep my hands to myself and maintain the foot or so distance between us.
“You don’t want to dance with me?” Mason asked. “Are you trying to hurt my feelings?”
The humour in his tone helped snap me out of the strange mood that had come over me. When the urge hit to goad him into our usual banter, I knew I’d made it back to something that would pass for normal. “It’s more of a safety issue,” I told him. “I’m just scared I might get injured by your flailing arms.”
“Oh, is that right?”
I shrugged and gave him a meek smile. “Sorry.”
“You don’t look sorry.” Mason grabbed my hand and pulled me against him. His long, smooth fingers slid between mine and his free arm snaked around my waist, his hold on me tightening until our bodies were pressed together from chest to hip. “Maybe we should do some slow dancing then so there’s no chance of injury.”
God. Too close. Not close enough. If there was ever a moment for a spontaneous orgasm, now would have been that time. As he began swaying with me, I sucked in a breath and made an effort to ignore the rapid beating of my heart.
“I saw the way you took care of Hannah,” he said, appearing oblivious to my struggle. “You’d make a great nurse.”
I made myself glance up at him and smile. “If you ever need someone to rub your back while you hug the toilet, I’m your girl.”
He gave my hip a squeeze. “Pretty sure I can think of better things to hug.”
“Like a teddy bear?”
“No.” He spun me around without warning then dragged me back against him. For someone who made such a spectacular mess of freestyle dancing he sure knew how to execute the slow moves. “I sleep with a stuffed penguin.”
Such a simple thing to admit, but it made me smile because I’d just learned something new and completely endearing about him. Picturing a masculine guy like Mason snuggling with a penguin… God, why did that do things to me? I laughed and let him spin me around again. “How did I not know something that adorable about you?”
“Hmm… maybe because you haven’t come in my room before.”
The husky edge to his voice made my breath catch, the double meaning in his words shocking me in the best kind of way. When I lifted my gaze to meet his electricity zapped between us, spreading goosebumps over my skin and leaving me feeling like I’d been wrapped in a warm blanket at the same time.
His expression tempted me, challenging me
to take the conversation deeper. Maybe to a place not quite so innocent.
“You want me to come in your room so you can show me your penguin, Mason?”
He laughed and lowered me into a dip before bringing me to an upright position again. “If you’re nice to me I might even let you hold it.”
I stared up at him and blinked. Mason didn’t talk to me this way. Sure, we had the witty banter thing going on and traded insults way too often, but this was different. Actual flirting. The kind he usually reserved for women who weren’t me. The newness of it sent a thrill rushing through me. “Well, if it’s as appealing as I think it’s going to be—”
“Don’t go there, Sadie.”
His tone and the reckless glint in his eye suggested he wanted me to do the exact opposite. We were already in unfamiliar territory. There didn’t seem to be any point in holding back now. “I’ll probably want to kiss it on the head.”
His loud bark of laughter made me feel ridiculously proud of myself. He let go of my hand and slipped his arms around me, holding me so firmly the muscles in his chest and abs were pressed against me. When he growled beside my ear I dragged in a breath and held it, unsure how to react now we were standing so close to each other.
I had no idea what was going on here, but I didn’t ever want it to stop.
Mason chuckled, the sound low and throaty and thrilling. He touched his lips to my temple, his mouth lingering there as if he didn’t want to lose the connection. I sighed as our bodies began moving to the music again, continuing the pretence of dancing even though we’d progressed to something a whole lot more interesting.
“Are you drunk?” I turned my head and came into close contact with dark stubble and warm, tanned skin. He smelled so delicious, I wanted to lick him. “Is that why you’re being all touchy feely with me?”
Nothing about the way he moved or spoke suggested he’d had too much to drink. He didn’t need to be buzzed to start throwing around those crazy dance moves of his either.