by A J Newman
Jim Payne is 25 years old and only 5’ 6” tall and barely weighs 155 soaking wet. He had blond hair, was good-natured and a dependable worker. Hasn’t met the right girl, but has one cute girlfriend, Imelda. They all drool when she visits him at the shop.
Jim grew up at Scott’s house, he was usually at home there and John and Ann thought of him as their own son. John knew his parents and did not think much of them. They were into their own lives and did not have much time for Jim. Jim was a good boy and was a good friend for Scott since he had no other siblings. Scott started out pretty much alone until Jim came along.
John had bitched, moaned and groaned about the others ruining their trips over the years, perhaps John over did it. They rebelled! That is how the idea for the back to basics trip came about and how they found out what they were really made of. You see, they were meeting last winter to plan the next outing and John mentioned a couple of their faults that ruined the past trips and they came out in attack mode! John never saw it coming; he worked hard putting these outings together for years getting the gear and food ready. This went on for years; he never knew that he annoyed anyone. Then they jumped on him like a duck on a June bug. Never in over 10 years of camping with this crew did John ever hear one critical word about his behavior. John knew that he was no saint, but was nothing like the others; he would never bother anyone. Bullshit! They set him straight. They said that he cussed too much.
John thought, “Me, fucking cussing too much, what a crock of crap.”
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Chapter 3
The Trip
Mobile, Alabama
May 15, 2020
The Trip was meant to be fun for five friends and buddies. It was understood that it would be mentally and physically demanding. No one dreamed that The Trip would change all of their lives and set them up for some of the greatest challenges a man could endure. The Trip was meant to be fun. The Trip was meant to help old friends patch up some differences. It was meant to be many things, but damn; it was just a trip. Who would have thought their lives would be in danger and that they would suffer so much and pay such a dear price.
They had all agreed that there would be no radios, TVs, cell phones, CD players, gadgets or the other bullshit tapestries of modern convenience. These things always ruined their other outings and strained their relationship. This was to be the trip to end all trips. This was not to be a run up to the lake or a walk in the park. Other trips had been fouled up by each of them trying to get away, but always taking their work or commitments with them on their yearly outings. They were the best of friends, but they annoyed the hell out of each other at times.
This trip was set up from the get go to stress hunting, a little fishing and fun. No work, no women, no distractions. Books, magazines and the Internet, they researched the topic very well and came up with an unusual and challenging two week visit to the great outdoors that would give them a taste for the real outdoors, just like Jim Bridger or an 18th century trapper would have experienced. Other than First Aid supplies, the only modern equipment would be their fishing equipment. Guns would be black powder just as Daniel Boone had. Everything else had to have existed in the early 1850’s or it would be left behind.
Of course, since they were all Preppers, they would take their Bug Out Bags and personal survival weapons, but had no intention of using them.
They all had their concealed carry permits and each one had a personal weapon on them at all times. John carried a KEL-TEC .380, but the rest had Ruger LCP .380s as concealed carries. The KEL-TEC was the lightest and barely made a bulge in his pocket. Some of their other friends and coworkers made fun of them at times, but they paid them no attention. Being prepared was a way of life for them.
Gus wanted to take them down to Florida, to a lake just about 80 miles from Lake Okeechobee. No research, just from the gut. They had been to Florida five or six times and no one was interested.
Scott wanted to go to Colorado, out east of Colorado Springs for some trout fishing. He had been stationed at Fort Carson for two years and loved the area, but had never been able to go back due to family commitments and school. Jim always agreed with Scott, does the boy have a brain?
John really didn’t care where they went, but quite a few of his radio call in fans had recommended the Great Adventures Outdoors Co. to help them plan their trip.
The past two years had been rather difficult for him, the divorce from Scott’s mother, Ann had been a terrible experience and John just wanted to get away from the shop and everything else.
Steve looked up the “Great Adventures Outdoors” on the Internet. They were based out of Salt Lake City and flew clients into selected wild areas all over the upper Southwest, Four Corners area and Mid-northwest. He corresponded back and forth with them for over a month and obtained brochures for various outdoors experiences and a list of references. They flew groups into the great outdoors, landed on a lake, left them for a week or two and then returned to pick up the group. They had over a dozen planes ranging from a couple of DC3’s to modern 12 passenger twin-engine floatplanes. Maria, the GAO representative, and Steve became internet friends because of the prolonged dialog. Hell, you know Steve; he wanted to get in her pants just like all the rest. Being unable to see or talk to her in person just made it more intriguing. She sold Steve on a hunting and fishing trip to Idaho and he sold the rest of the group.
Steve told Maria of their need to experience the great outdoors without all the distractions, a real roughing trip. Take very little food or water and live off the land. Catch some fish to eat and hunt the rest of the time. Maria had just the place in mind, guaranteed fish, game and drinkable water. It was in Idaho, just south of the Montana border.
A lot of work goes into any trip; normally it took a week to get their gear together. This time it was much easier. Each man had a black powder rifle, fishing gear, a pup tent, a knife, two changes of clothes, a few cooking utensils and the first aid kit.
Their Bug Out Bags were standard backpacks and all had three days food, water purification tablets, thermal blankets, weapons and ammo. Most also contained numerous other survival gear such as a magnesium fire starter, folding saw, buck knife and other assorted gear. John’s also had a KEL-TEC P11 9mm and a Mark I Ruger .22 pistols with 100 rounds for each. The others all had 9mm autos accept Gus and he had a Colt 1911–.45 automatic.
The group just had to drive from Mobile to Salt Lake City and leave the rest to GAO. They could have flown to Utah, but Jim and Steve could not afford the airfare and while John’s book royalties paid for the trip, he could not cover the extra cost. While John’s business was quite profitable, the divorce had cleaned him out and Ann got half of the current business’ profit. He got to keep any money from expanding his body shop and custom car work business.
The guys met at the shop the night before and loaded up their gear and road trip food and beverages. The RV was 35 feet long and slept six, but it seemed that everyone brought everything they owned. Gus quickly took charge and had them pare down the extra bullshit.
“Steve, this ain’t no fashion contest; a pair of jeans, some shorts, a couple of shirts, socks and underwear are all you need.”
Gus chortled and added, “You don’t need two big ass suitcases to go hunting.”
He made all of them unpack their crap and repack to his specifications.
Jim got after him, “Gus, I don’t remember you being my Momma or being put in charge of my ass.”
Gus came over, wrestled Jim to the floor and then tickled him until he almost pissed his pants.
Scott went over to John and exclaimed, “Gus must have got laid last night, I’ve known him most of my life and that’s the most fun I can ever remember out of him.”
John slept at the shop that night, but was up by 5:00a.m., checked things out and made a pot of coffee. He went over his bullet points for his show that morning and quickly moved on to eat some sausage and biscuits he had nuked in the microwave. Scott arrived just five mi
nutes before the show started.
“Good Morning LA, I love the U…S…A,"
John asked his morning audience. “How are all of my Prepper Buddies doing this fine day in Lower Alabama?”
He then added, “The President can kiss my redneck ass. I’m John Harris and I hope to have some fun today with my son, Scott, discussing how to put a Bug Out Bag together and what to put in the rascal that might save your neck one day. Scott, tell ’em what to put in their bag!”
Scott proceeded to tell them every item and why it was important. This took about 45 minutes with John inserting jokes and his own personal experiences. He took two callers, answered their questions and moved on.
John then added, “I know a few of you don’t appreciate guns like the rest of us, but one of these days you will say to yourself, I wish I had listened to old John and put a gun and ammo in my darned old Bug Out Bag. Now I have a Ruger MK I with 100 rounds of hollow point LR and a “P11, 9mm with 100 rounds of ball ammo. These two weapons give you the ability to put game on the table and protect yourself from the bad guys. As I always say, “a pistol is just a tool to get a real gun.” I’m also looking at adding one of those breakdown .22 survival rifles made by Henry. You might just kill a rabbit or two with that one.”
John ended the show reminding his audience that he was on vacation for the next two weeks and that they would be hearing the best of “How to Survive” during his absence.
• • •
John went to the restroom to take a shower and freshen up before the rest of the guys arrived. He took a long hot shower thinking about Ann and wondering if he could get back with her. She was good in bed, even if she was above his raisin'. He walked out of the shower buck-naked right into JoAnne who smiled and asked him if he was happy to see her. He looked at her and saw that she had a halter-top that just barely covered her breasts and the shortest white shorts that he had ever seen. He then remembered to grab a towel to cover himself.
“What are you doing in so early on a Saturday morning, JoAnne?” John asked.
“Well, I was just worried about you, with no wife to take care of you. I want to make sure that you are taken care of,” replied JoAnne.
She then walked up to him and wrapped her arms around him while rubbing her body against him. John forgot himself for a few minutes then came to his senses and pushed her away.
John calmly told her, “JoAnne, you are the best person for your job and never have to do anything like that again. Your job just depends on your work. Sex has nothing to do with it.”
He also told her that he had wondered why so many women quit their jobs before he started working there. She told him that his Dad got much better at hiding his womanizing after John and Gus started working there. John then told her that he was not interested in her, but that would never affect her job.
JoAnne gave John a peck on the cheek and thanked him for being a gentleman then excused herself and walked away. As she walked away, John had to admit she had a fine ass. Just as he started to smile she turned and looked back, she smiled and walked away.
John took a few minutes to call Ann, his ex-wife, to fill her in on this issue. He knew that JoAnne and Ann had been close at one time and he wanted her to look in on JoAnne while he was gone.
“Good morning, Ann, how are you today?” John said in his friendliest voice.
She replied, “What time is it, is the sun even up this early?”
John filled her in on what had happened and what JoAnne had told him about his Dad and JoAnne.
She sarcastically said, “John, you dummy, everybody in town knows what a whoremonger Buddy is, even your mom knows. John, I’m worried about you. JoAnne rubs her body on you and you didn’t give in and make love to her. I’ll bet you haven’t been laid since I left you.”
John stammered and could not come up with a thing to say.
Ann piled on with, “John, you were boring, but great in bed, so to help you I am going to set you up with one of my friends from the club. She’s 40, great looking and horny as hell...even you will get laid if you spend a minute with her.”
John quickly replied, “I’ll find my own girl in my own time. I certainly don’t need you to find me a woman.”
“So you think that you will just stumble over a perfect woman fishing and hunting out in those nasty woods that you so love. It won’t happen, Dumb ass. John even though you don’t believe it, I still care for you and want you to be happy, find a woman and treat her right. Take her on trips and buy her beautiful things,” Ann added.
“So I have listened to you lecture me for ten freaking minutes. I was a good boy, now will you check on JoAnne?” John asked.
Ann replied, “John, you cuss too much. I promise that I will check on JoAnne, but if you had just bent her over her desk and ravaged her, she would be happy, I would be happy and you might be happy.” Ann laughed and hung up.
John thought, “Well that went rather well.”
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Chapter 4
Great American Outdoors
Mobile, Alabama
May 16, 2020
They finished loading up the RV and hauled ass across from the Gulf to Salt Lake City. The drive was only a little over 1900 miles and with 5 drivers it was 29 hours, but uneventful. While they all took turns, John drove most of the way. He was not a big drinker and a lousy poker player. He would think about the plot for the next book and used a voice note-taking program on his phone so he would not forget anything. They made sure that the driver was sober; roughing it meant no beer, so they enjoyed themselves while they could. There was an ongoing poker game and Steve took all off the money. Drive, drink and play poker, at least they didn’t have to stop for a bathroom.
They arrived in Salt Lake about 8:00 a.m. and stopped for breakfast before driving on to the GAO office at the airport. As usual, there was an argument on where to eat and no one could agree, so John pulled into the parking lot of a local family run restaurant.
They all started complaining and John said, “Shut the hell up and either stay in the RV or come in and eat with me. I’m buying, I don’t care which one you do."
Of course, they all piled out and went in with John.
They were seated quickly and the waitress was very friendly and took their orders. While waiting on their food, they overheard three older gentlemen having a rather lively discussion about, “How those damn Mexicans and Muslims were moving into the area and ruining the place.” Naturally, Gus had to nose into the conversation. He went over and joined in just as he had known them all of his life.
Gus asked, “What is all the fuss about the foreigners?”
The one in the red shirt told Gus, “That damn hunting trip company keeps bringing in these foreigners instead of hiring decent local folks.”
Gus asked, “Do you mean the Great American Outdoors?”
All three started complaining about GAO and kept talking over each other.
The red shirt guy told them to pipe down and said, “Yes, those guys are bringing in those damn Mexicans and Muslims and I think they are moving out into the country to form those damn sleeper cells we hear about.”
Gus asked, “How many have you seen? A small company like that couldn’t use a whole bunch of workers.”
The guy replied that he had seen at least 50 different Mexican workers in the last 6 months and that there were never more than 6-7 working at the airport at any one time. They also said that Muslim looking men flew in and out about once a month.
One of the guys said that the Muslims never came into town and kept a low profile while at the GAO operation. The old Guys then started talking local politics which interested Gus, but he came back just in time for breakfast to be served.
Gus told them about the conversation while they were eating. Between bites, he added his two cents and thought that something smelled about GAO. The rest of them were not as concerned and just were too excited about their trip.
They arrived at the GAO office at 10:30 a
.m. The GAO office was actually south of the airport at Utah Lake since they had several floatplanes. As they drove up, Gus saw several float planes at the dock, two DC 3s and what looked like an old Huey helicopter close to the office.
Gus and John were both fixed wing and Helo qualified. They co-owned an old biplane that had been a crop duster. They had converted it to a four-passenger toy to fly to NASCAR events and just have some fun. It was very slow, but lots of fun and would haul a ton of luggage. Thank god, it had been in Gus’ name or half would have belonged to Ann.
Steve went into the office to find Maria while the guys stretched their legs. The guys walked around the compound and found that it was much larger than they would have guessed. There was the expected office and hanger, but there also was a warehouse building that had a couple of armed guards. When they approached, one of the guards came out to stop them from getting any closer. He told them that they needed to go back to the office or they might miss their plane. Jim noticed that the guard had an unusual tattoo on his forearm. It appeared to be a small monster with a big head and large teeth.
When Jim asked about the tattoo, the guard smiled and said, “It’s just a Tasmanian Devil.”
Jim said, “You know it actually looks like one of those mythical Mexican monsters. I can’t think of the name, but it will come to me.”
The guard looked pissed and told them to get back to the office.