by E. C. Bell
She’d found me hanging out in the pasture, watching the sun set. I didn’t want to talk to her but it was getting hard to convince her to leave me alone. I guess it was my own fault, since I’d taught her how to pick things up. Now she acted like we were best buds, or something.
I didn’t want to be friends with her. Who I wanted to be friends—more than friends—with was Marie, even though she’d asked me to haunt Dr. Parkerson.
I wanted to say, “Leave the doctor alone, she’s been good to me,” but I couldn’t do that either. Dr, Parkerson had caused me a lot of problems too, over the years.
“Maybe she needs to be spoken to,” I said. Then I laughed. “Not that she can hear us or see us. It would just be good if she knew that she shouldn’t have treated us that way.”
“I’m not going to talk to her,” Phillipa said.
“Well, Marie could help,” I said.
Phillipa shook her head. “No. Marie’s not strong enough. But we are. We need to do this alone.” She smiled, and it was a wondrous, frightening thing to see. “You’re going to love how strong it makes you feel.”
I’d never felt strong in my life—or death—and the idea sort of appealed. Then I realized if I went along with Phillipa, and Dr. Parkerson finally learned that there really were ghosts, Marie would get what she wanted, too. I imagined she’d be thankful. That she’d be thankful to me.
“All right,” I said to Phillipa. “Let’s go be strong.”
She laughed. Sounded more like a howl, and she turned away from the sunrise. So I followed. ’Cause that was what I was really good at. Following.
Marie:
Meatloaf and Otto
THE FRIGHTENED ORDERLY who’d brought me my pills obviously drew the short straw, because he was the one who had to take me to the dining room for lunch.
I tried small talking him, but he wouldn’t even tell me his name. Just ran me from my room to the dining hall and practically pushed me into the mass of patients before he went and hid out by the far wall.
I looked for Juliette, my dinner companion. She was at our usual table, but before I made it to her, I heard my name echoing across the hall. It was Otto, and he was waving. “Over here!” he cried. “Come sit with us!”
He was at the table with Ralph and the other Monopoly players, and he seemed pretty determined to have me join them.
“Can I sit there?” I asked one of the servers, who shrugged and said she didn’t care where I sat, just as long as I didn’t cause any trouble.
Juliette looked disappointed when I walked over to Otto’s table, but I promised myself I’d spend the next meal with her, once I had talked to Otto about what he knew about Natalie—and about the other deaths.
I noticed there was a ghost hanging out near Otto’s table. It was Miranda, the girl with the eating disorder. She smiled and nodded at the plates full of food that were being delivered to each table. Apparently, she liked meatloaf day as much as Nurse Willoughby did.
I watched her lips move, but over the noise of the dining hall, I couldn’t hear a word she said. I shrugged at her. Sorry, dead girl, I thought. I need to deal with the living, this time around.
“How’s it going, Otto?” I asked.
“Great,” he yelled, then looked over at the line of orderlies leaning against the wall. “Great,” he said again, his voice low. “Thanks for sitting with us,” he said. “You’re a hero. You know that, right?”
“What do you mean?”
“You offed Rafferty,” Ralph said. “You deserve a medal.”
I frowned. “I didn’t off Rafferty,” I said. “He’s not dead.”
“I heard he was,” the Monopoly money thief said. “Roger Moreland on Floor Three told Jennifer, who’s in group with me. And Jennifer told me.” He smiled. “You tore off his dick and fed it to him. Nice.”
“That’s not what happened,” Otto said. He looked pinched, like he was pissed that his “you are a hero” moment had been usurped by the rest of the people at the table. “Tell them, Marie. You cut off his dick, and his nose. Rammed them both up his—” He looked around, like he wanted to make sure nobody else was listening in on our conversation. “Rammed them both up his poop chute. I heard he died because he couldn’t, you know, relieve himself.”
“Oh, that’s a lie,” Ralph scoffed. “She didn’t do any of that, did you, Marie?”
He glanced at me, but before I could say a word, he turned back to the table. “She ripped off his arm,” he said. “And beat him to death with it. Didn’t you?”
All right, this had to stop. “I didn’t do any of that,” I said, and stared at them all. “Ripping his arm off? Stuffing his nose up his poop chute? Seriously? Where did you guys hear that stuff?”
“I told you,” the money thief said triumphantly. “Roger was right. You tore off—”
“No!” I yelled. Then it was my turn to stare at the orderlies until I was sure I hadn’t caught their attention. “No,” I said again. “It was none of that. He was going to hurt me, so I protected myself. That’s all. He’s not dead. He’s been taken to a hospital, and he’ll make a full recovery.” I hoped.
“Oh,” the money thief said. He looked disappointed.
“Really?” Otto asked. He looked disappointed too, and I figured I probably wasn’t getting that hero medal any time soon.
“Really,” I said. “But at least Rafferty’s gone. Right?”
“Right,” Ralph said. “That’s good, I guess.”
We ate in silence for a few minutes, and I had to admit, the meatloaf didn’t taste half bad. I couldn’t think of a way to casually ask Otto about the other deaths that had happened recently. I was afraid that all I’d get from him would be more rumours from the mill. If they’d managed to screw up the story of what I’d done to Rafferty, who knew what he’d tell me about Natalie. My guess was, that story wouldn’t even be close to the truth, either.
Didn’t matter. This was my chance to talk to him, out of group, and whatever he said, I had to hear it. I could try to work out the gossip from the truth, later.
“So, Otto,” I said. “What have you heard about Natalie? I heard she died. Do you know what happened?”
Otto shrugged, still obviously miffed. “I didn’t hear anything about her,” he said.
“What about the rest of you guys?” I asked.
Ralph looked around the table, like he was waiting for his turn. When the money thief shook his head, he looked at me and smiled. “I heard she ate herself to death. Somehow, she managed to get into the kitchen, and she ate all the food that had been prepared for us.” He leaned back and looked quite pleased with himself. “I believe it was a lunch. She ate all the lasagne, and they ended up feeding us sandwiches that day.” He looked around the table again. “You remember that day?” he asked, and shook his head. “That was a terrible day.”
Otto nodded. “I think I do,” he said. Looked like he was over his snit. “But I thought that they found something bad in the lasagne, and that’s why we ended up with the sandwiches.”
“Something bad?” I asked, wondering if it was poison they’d found. Maybe Nurse Melodie had really upped her game and had tried to kill a bunch of people. “What was it?”
“I heard it was shit,” the money thief said. “Somebody shit in the lasagne, and that’s why we ended up with sandwiches.” He scoffed. “Natalie had nothing to do with it.”
“Unless she was the one who shit in the food,” Otto said.
“She wouldn’t wreck good food like that,” Frank said. “She liked to eat, that girl did. Which is why I’m pretty sure that she ate all the lasagne. And it killed her.”
Everyone at the table bristled, and I got the feeling that if I didn’t stop what was going on, I’d end up in the middle of a brawl. “Thank you,” I said. “This is good information, I’m sure. I’ll be able to figure out what happened to her now. I’m positive of it.”
“Why did you want to know about Natalie?” Otto asked. “Was it because of what
Rafferty did to her?”
“What did he do?” I asked.
“Oh, he was doing bad stuff to her,” he said. “All the time. She even told her shrink about it, to make it stop. Or so I heard.”
Ralph nodded. “Ask Dr. Parkerson,” he said. “She’d know.”
Why didn’t that surprise me? “Thank you,” I said.
Finally, I had a piece of information I could actually use. I could ask my shrink why another of her patients who had a real problem with Rafferty and who went to her with that information, died.
What if she was working with Nurse Melodie? What if they were picking patients to kill, together? That would explain why, even though patients were dying in this place, year after year, Parkerson appeared to do nothing about it. Because she was involved.
Through the rest of the meal, Otto nattered on about helping me figure out what had happened to Natalie.
“Maybe I’ll ask the dead,” he said. “After all, they see everything that goes on in this place. I’d say that would be your next logical step.”
“Shut up about the frigging ghosts,” Ralph said. He looked at me and shrugged. “He thinks he can see ghosts again,” he said, and laughed. “Time for them to up his meds.”
Otto pulled himself as tall as he could. “I’m not the only one who has the ability to see the dead,” he said. “I heard Marie can too. Tell them, Marie. Tell them about the dead people in this place.”
He looked around, his eyes skipping over Miranda, the dead girl who was still walking from table to table watching as the meatloaf was being consumed, bite by tasty bite. He pointed at the fire place. “See?” he said. “They’re over there right now. Warming themselves by the fire. Tell them, Marie.”
I glanced at the fireplace, which was completely devoid of ghosts, and fire, and then back at Otto. “There’s nothing there,” I said. “I’m sorry, Otto.”
He looked at me like I’d beaten him. “Don’t say that,” he begged. “Tell them there are dead people here. That I’m not lying.”
“Oh, there are dead people here,” I said. Ralph gasped and pulled away from me like he thought maybe I needed to have my meds upped too. “But Otto, I don’t think you’re actually seeing them.”
“I’m not? But what about—” He pointed at the fireplace. “What about them?”
“I told you, Otto,” I said as gently as I could. “There are no dead people there.”
I wondered if he could somehow sense the dead around him, without being able to see them. Possibly his affliction, or the meds he took for that affliction, was giving him that ability. What a nightmare that would be. Knowing there was more in the world than what most people could see, and having the medication he was on make him believe he could see what he could not.
I stood and walked away from the table, so I didn’t have to watch him cry. My orderly jumped to attention and scurried over to me. “Something wrong?” he asked. He sounded hopeful, like if I confessed, he’d be able to lock me back up. “Why is Otto crying?”
“I don’t know,” I said. A lie, but whatever. I didn’t owe this guy the truth.
“Have you finished eating?” He looked at my almost untouched plate, and then at me.
“I ate as much as I could,” I said. “I think my new meds are affecting my appetite.” Another lie, but I didn’t care about that, either.
He gave me the “this is going in your file” look. “If you’ve finished, you gotta get cleaned up for your session with Dr. Parkerson.”
“Of course,” I said. “Lead the way.”
As I walked out of the dining hall, I heard Otto scream my name. Two orderlies ran past me to my old table and tackled him. They dragged him off down the hallway behind me. He was going to the quiet rooms for a little time out. But I couldn’t worry about him. I needed to prepare myself for my session with Dr. Parkerson. It was going to be a doozie, I was sure. And at the very least, I wanted to make sure my hair was brushed for it.
Jasper:
Off to See the Psychiatrist
AS I FOLLOWED Phillipa, my bravery fled. This was wrong. Neither of us should be going to Dr. Parkerson’s office. I wished I could talk to Marie, or even Franklin.
“Maybe we should give this a little more thought,” I said. “Talk it over with the group, or something.”
“I’m done talking,” Phillipa said shortly. “It’s time for action.”
She walked through the doctor’s closed door, and I followed. Dr. Parkerson was sitting at her desk, and I could tell that she was preparing for a session with one of her patients. I saw the file she was studying and wondered whose it was.
But before I could say a word, Phillipa flew across the room and over the desk. She grabbed the doctor by her hair and threw her to the floor.
Dr. Parkerson looked terrified. She squalled and tried to crawl to the door, but Phillipa was on her in an instant. She dragged her back to the desk and began battering her head on the highly polished surface. Over and over.
She was so strong. How could I ever stop her?
I didn’t know, but I wished I could. Because I was afraid Phillipa wasn’t just going to tune the doctor in. I was afraid she was going to kill her.
Marie:
A Session with Parkerson I’ll Never Forget
SCREAMS ECHOED DOWN the long hallway leading to Parkerson’s office, and the orderly walking me there stiffened.
“What’s going on, now?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” I said, even though he wasn’t talking to me. He’d barely acknowledged my presence since he’d taken me back to my room to prepare for my session with my shrink. “Could it be one of her patients, losing it on her?”
She could definitely piss people off. I was a shining example of that, but I’d never felt so overwhelmed that I felt like screaming like that. It sounded like someone was being hurt. Being killed.
“Dammit,” I muttered, and pushed past the orderly and ran down the hallway. I threw the door open and the orderly rushed in behind me. Then we both staggered to a stop and stared.
“What the hell?” he asked.
I imagined that it looked worse to him, since he couldn’t see the ghosts in the room, and I could. But it was bad enough, even with the ghosts.
Phillipa had Parkerson by the hair and was slamming her head onto the desk, over and over. Her light was so overwhelmingly bright in the semi-dark room, it hurt my eyes. “This is for Jasper,” she said. Slam. “And for me.” Slam. “And for everybody else you’ve fucked over in this place.” Slam. “But especially for me.”
“Stop it!” I cried. “Phillipa! Stop it right now!”
I was going to run to her, but the orderly grabbed me by the arm. “Don’t you touch her,” he cried. “She’s having a seizure or something.”
Jasper scurried up to me. He was out of his mind at what was going on in front of him.
“Make her stop,” he begged me. “This isn’t what I wanted. Just make her stop.”
“I’ll do my best,” I said to him, though I really didn’t know how I was going to do that. I couldn’t touch Phillipa, and she was right out of control again, just like she’d been with Rafferty.
I knocked the orderly’s hand from my arm, and when he reached for me again, I put him down, just the way I’d learned at my self-defence classes so long ago. “I need to stop this,” I said to him. “Just stay out of the way.”
He looked terrified and cowered on the floor where I’d put him. “Don’t hurt me,” he said. “Please don’t hurt me.”
I ignored him and walked up to Philippa. “Stop this,” I said. “Now.”
She laughed. “I don’t think so,” she said. “She owes a bunch of us an apology.” She rammed the doctor’s face into her desk once more, and Parkerson screamed. “That one’s for you, Marie,” Philippa said. “Bitch doesn’t believe any of us, but she has to learn. Doesn’t she?”
“Not this way,” I said.
“Why not?” Phillipa howled. “She deserves it!�
��
She pulled the doctor’s head back, preparing for another strike, and Parkerson’s eyes flashed white in the red of the blood running from everywhere, it seemed. “Help me,” she said.
“She doesn’t deserve this,” I said to Phillipa. “Any more than Rafferty deserved what he got.”
“Oh, he deserved everything he got,” she snapped, but she did let Parkerson’s hair go so she could walk up to me and lean in. Parkerson’s head fell forward, but she managed to keep from smashing her own face off her desk, and then she squealed and threw herself to the floor, trying to crawl away from whatever had attacked her. Something she couldn’t even see.
Phillipa ignored her, figuring, quite rightly, that she could go back to hurting the doctor again once she’d dealt with me. We were now face to face, and I could feel her rage washing over me hot, like blood.
“Nobody will do anything,” she said. “So, it’s up to me. You taught Jasper, and he taught me. See? You helped us. Now, I can make her pay. Isn’t that what you wanted?”
“No,” I said.
“Really?” she asked. “That’s not what Jasper told me.”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Jasper squalled, somewhere behind me. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.”
“Neither did I,” I said. “Neither did I.”
She was right. I’d started this, but now I had to stop it. Finish it, if I could.
“This isn’t the way,” I said to Phillipa. “And you know it.”
Dr. Parkerson had crawled to the middle of her office and was about to escape through the door that the orderly had left open when he’d run away. He was probably going for help, but I knew that it didn’t matter who he brought with him, he was not going to be able to stop what was going on in this room.
Phillipa laughed and leaped away from me to the door. Slammed it shut, and hit the doctor, hard. “Tell her to sit down,” she said to me. “And be good.”