by Ann Everett
She jerked away. “We’re not having sex.”
He groaned. “Oh come on.”
“No. You’ve got a big game tomorrow and early curfew.”
“You know that’s bullshit about no sex before a game, right?”
“But you need your strength. Besides, I’m tired.”
“Okay. How about a secret? You’ve got one I want to know.”
“I do? What?”
“Why won’t you tell me you love me?”
Her heart raced and for a minute she couldn’t think of anything to say, so he said, “I know you do, so why won’t you say it?”
She released a deep breath. She did love him. More than she’d ever loved anyone in her life and the thought of giving that to him caused fear to rise in her throat. “Every person I’ve loved most in the world has died or not loved me back.”
“Well, I don’t plan on expiring anytime soon and I already love you back, so I don’t see a problem.”
“When you say you love me, I believe you because I know you believe it. But I’m different from any girl you’ve ever been with and I can’t help wondering if you’re confused.”
He placed his fingers on her chin and turned her face to his. “You think you’re a bad boy’s redemption phase?”
“Maybe.”
“Well, I’m no expert on love, but I’m a damn good authority when it comes to lust and this is not casual desire. When I’m away from you, I can’t wait to see you. When we’re together, I don’t want to leave. I love you more every day. If you were a phase, trust me, I’d already be losing interest.”
He rolled onto her and pinned her hands above her head. “Say it.”
“No.”
“Just because you won’t say it doesn’t mean you don’t feel it and I know you do. So say it, because I need to hear it. I need for you to tell me you love me.”
“I’m afraid I’ll jinx it. If I admit it, it’s like I’m giving you permission to hurt me.”
“I won’t. I swear. But if you need more time, I’ll wait until you’re ready.” He leaned in and took her mouth. A deep, passionate, lust filled kiss. When it ended, he whispered, “I love you and I always will. That’s a promise.”
Tears pooled. To hell with it. He was worth the risk. “I love you, too.”
The grin she loved so much appeared. He lifted his brows. “See, not so hard, was it?” He held her tight. “Earlier today, I dropped off a gift for you. Sarah was supposed to put it under your pillow. Check to see if it’s there.”
She ran her hand beneath it and retrieved a small pink organza bag, tied with a white bow. Loosening the ribbon, she slid a gold bangle bracelet into her palm. “This is beautiful.”
He reached past her and turned on the lamp. “It’s inscribed.”
The words inside the rim, I love you every day gleamed as bright as Jace’s eyes. She clutched his shirt and pulled him into another kiss, then pressed her lips to his ear and whispered, “Okay, now I’m re-considering my earlier statement concerning no sex.”
Early the next morning, while John Sloan put Maggie’s bag in the trunk, she got into the back seat and decided to get the subject she’d been dreading out of the way. She twirled the gold bangle around her wrist, the metal, leaving a trail of warmth and love on her skin. Jace loves me. The nagging doubt she’d had before disappeared and in its place a calm she’d not experienced in years. Right now, this minute, he loved her.
“I love Jace,” she declared and Elizabeth swiveled in her seat to face her. “I hesitated the other day because I’d not even said those words to him. But now I have, so I thought you deserved an answer.”
“Thank you and I apologize. I had no right to meddle. Someday you’ll be a mother, and you’ll spend a good amount of your time worrying about your children’s happiness.”
“I understand. Jared told me his story.”
John opened the door and slid in behind the steering wheel. “You girls ready to go?”
“We are,” Elizabeth said, then turned back to Maggie. “I have a confession. When Bob told me he had the perfect girl to tutor Jace, he also said he thought you’d be perfect for Jared. That’s why I wanted you to meet him. But by the time we could all get together for dinner, Jace was interested in you and I was pretty sure the attraction was mutual.”
She waited a moment to let the revelation sink in. This was a side of Elizabeth she’d not seen. Manipulation. Not to mention being in cahoots with her brother. She wasn’t angry, just surprised. “So I was set up?”
“Not really. Jace needed the help. Jared was an afterthought. His break-up was a hard one. It took him a long time to get over it and since then, he hasn’t dated much. When Julie called off the wedding after the invitations had gone out, he stopped trusting women. Bob thought you’d be the one to restore his faith.”
“Does Jace know this?”
“Yes.”
“Well, that explains a lot.”
“What do you mean?”
“Something he said about Jared deserving me more than he does.”
John had been quiet until then, but said over his shoulder. “You’re good for Jace. We’ve noticed a change. He’s not so self-centered anymore and that’s a good thing.”
“I’ve noticed a difference, too,” Maggie said. “He showed up at the hospital yesterday to visit the children’s ward all on his own. He wouldn’t have done that a few months ago.”
John laughed. “Well, let’s not give him too much credit. He got to see you, after all.”
True love always makes a man better, no matter what woman inspires it.
~Alexandre Dumas
Before Maggie ever met Jace, she loved football games. The hot dogs. The half-time show. The roar of the fans. Those tight pants. Well, the tight pants part came after she met him.
As much as he loved the sport, she worried about him. No doubt, his parents, especially his dad, would be disappointed when Jace told them of his plans not to pursue a pro career, but it pleased Maggie.
Along with John and Elizabeth, she sat in the stands at Cowboy Stadium and cheered for the Red Raiders. They were well into the third quarter. Tech was in the lead and had possession of the ball. The quarterback completed a long pass to Jace, who took a solid hit. Along with John and Elizabeth, she jumped to her feet and waited. He lay there long enough to cause a knot in the pit of Maggie’s stomach. When he finally got to his feet, even though unsteady, they all released the breath they were holding. Thanks to his effort, the team made a first and ten. The crowd cheered and she relaxed a little.
On the next play, the quarterback rolled out and threw another pass. The ball spiraled high. Jace ran deep and made the catch. She clasped her hands together so tightly, they tingled from lack of blood flow. He picked up a couple of yards and then got hammered; his head hit the ground so hard, his helmet bounced like a ball. Her heart stopped.
She and his parents were on their feet again. He stayed on the ground and Maggie kept repeating in her head. Get up, get up, please get up. But he didn’t. The trainer came onto the field and Maggie forgot how to breathe.
When they placed him on a stretcher, she, along with his parents left the stands. As they listened to the game on the way to the hospital, the announcer continued to talk about Jace which made Maggie even more nervous.
Her pulse raced. Fear gripped her. He’d gestured with his hands to medical personnel as they carried him off the field, a good indication. Commonly on the other end of emergencies, today, in the hospital waiting room, Maggie experienced how families felt anxious about their loved ones.
Her insides were a mess, everything jittering and jumping. She clung to the bracelet he’d given her as if it were a life raft, and the only thing keeping her emotions in control. When the doctor appeared, a wave of nausea rolled over her. She wanted to run to him, but knew she should stay back and let his parents deal with the news.
“He’s fine,” the doctor said. “Grade one concussion, which is mild, and s
ome deep bruising on the shoulder. He’ll have a headache, but with rest, he’ll be fine. Do you have any questions?”
John turned to Maggie. “Do you know what we should ask?”
She smiled at John then faced the doctor. “Did he lose consciousness?”
“No, only dazed.”
“Do we need to keep him awake?” Elizabeth asked.
“No.”
“May we see him?”
“Of course. He actually asked to see Maggie. Is that you?”
“Yes.” She looked at Elizabeth. “You go first. I’ll see him after y’all.”
“You can go in together. As soon as I get his prescription written, and talk to university officials.” The doctor nodded toward the trainer also waiting. “I’ll release him. Should be thirty minutes or so.”
When they stepped into the small room, Maggie stayed back and let his parents take the lead.
Elizabeth went to his bedside and kissed his forehead. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a little knock upside the head. You say I need one of those every now and then anyway.” He motioned to Maggie. “Hey you, come here.”
Elizabeth stepped aside and Maggie moved to him. “You scared me.” A tear dropped onto his arm.
He picked up her hand and kissed it, then placed it on his heart. “Hey, don’t cry. I’m fine.” He grabbed a few locks of red hair and tugged her face to his and kissed her. “I feel better already with you here. I love you.”
She kissed him back. “I love you, too.”
Back at the hotel, Maggie was miserable because Jace was staying in his parents’ room. His mother insisted. The only positive side to the situation was Maggie had gotten in some good study time. On Monday, finals started and then graduation in three weeks.
When her head fell back against the headboard, she realized she’d nodded off. She put her laptop aside, got up, slipped into her night shirt, and crawled between the sheets. Within a few minutes, she fell asleep. When her phone chirped, it took her a moment to get her bearings. Once she did, she grabbed it and read the text from Jace.
Let me in.
When he stepped inside, he slid his arms around her. He felt so good, solid and strong, his muscles taut. She shivered and he pushed away from her.
“You’re not crying again, are you? Because I’m fine. Really. Those damn pain pills work miracles.”
“What did you tell your mother? How did you get out of their room? Does she know you’re here with me?”
He ambled to the bed and removed his boots. “Talk slower. My brain can’t process things. What was the first question?”
“Did you tell your mother you were coming to my room?”
“Yes. Who better than a nurse to monitor me?” He scooted over and patted the area next to him. “Come to bed.”
“You’re going to sleep in here? With me?”
“That’s the plan. Now come on. Get over here.”
She climbed in with him. “Oh my God. Your mom and dad are right down the hall. I’m embarrassed. They probably think we’re…you know.”
“Having wild monkey sex?”
She buried her face in the pillow. “Don’t say that!”
He laughed. “Hey, they know we have sex, so relax.”
She puffed out a breath. “It’s still embarrassing. Does your head hurt?”
“No.”
“You’re not dizzy, are you?”
“Only with love for you.”
“Smart-ass.” Maggie smiled. The fact that he was teasing her indicated he was really okay.
“Hey, that’s not good bedside manners.”
“You’re a terrible patient.”
“Yeah, I am. When I’m better, I plan to have some of that wild monkey sex with my nurse.”
“You’re awful.”
“Awful good.”
“So the season is over for you.”
“Football is over for me. Concussion number five gave me the perfect opportunity to break the news to Mom and Dad about not wanting to go pro.”
“How’d they take it?”
“Mom’s happy and Dad’s dealing with it. I also told them I’m moving home at semester break. I’m tired of living in the dorm. Mom was really happy with that news.”
“So you think your nurse will have sex with you?”
He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. “Oh yeah, she definitely will. I’m irresistible.” He drifted to sleep.
She snuggled against him and loved him even more than she thought possible.
Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible.
~Mother Teresa
Three weeks later, at six a.m. Maggie awoke to the soft rhythm of rain and a weird dream of little green frogs jumping on her stomach. It took a minute to clear her head from the sleepy haze and focus on the cap and gown still draped over the chair, a reminder of graduation the day before.
Her stomach vaulted. The taste of adrenaline filled her mouth. She untangled herself from Jace’s arms, sprinted into the bathroom, barely making it in time. When she finished vomiting, she brushed her teeth and wet a cloth with cold water, then bathed her face. On her way back to bed, she grabbed the trashcan.
“Are you okay?” Jace asked.
“No. I don’t know if it’s something I ate or if it’s a bug, but I don’t think that’s the last time I’m going to throw up. I feel terrible.”
He was silent for a moment, then said, “Are you sure those are your only choices?”
“What do you mean my only choices?”
“I mean, it’s morning and you’re sick. Could it be morning sickness?”
She faced him and narrowed her eyes. “I’m not pregnant. You know I’m on the pill.” She watched his jaw tighten and the tone in his voice changed.
“Look, we’ve been going at it like rabbits for weeks, and I’ve never used protection, so if you missed a pill…”
“I haven’t missed a pill. If I had, I would have said something and made sure you used a condom.” Blood rushed to her face. “Oh my God! You think I am and I did it on purpose!”
“No. No, that’s not what I’m saying. It was just a question.”
She cut him off. How could he? “It’s written on your face. Poor loveless Maggie gets pregnant to trap you. I would never do that! Do you know me at all? The one thing I’ve wanted most in my life is to be loved for me, only me. Not out of obligation, and certainly not because of a child. Crap! I’m going to be sick again.”
She lifted the trash can and buried her head in it and when she came up for air, she hissed at him. “Get out. Go. I can’t believe you think I’d do that to you. Just leave.”
He rolled to his elbow and rested his chin in hand. “No. I’m not leaving. I admit, I thought it possible, but not that you’d intentionally do it.”
“I’m not my mother. When I have children, I want them conceived out of true love. And I’d never hold a pregnancy over you to get you to commit to me. Leave. I don’t want to argue with you.”
When he wrapped his arms around her, she stiffened. Last night he told her he’d planned to find her father and surprise her, until his mother talked him out of it. Now, today, he suggested a pregnancy? Maybe he wasn’t recovered from his concussion. Either that or he really didn’t know her.
“I love you, and if you—we were pregnant, it’d be okay. I’d make it okay and not out of obligation. Understand?”
She wanted to believe him, but detected relief in his voice. What he didn’t understand was a baby conceived without marriage would be the worst possible thing that could happen to her because she’d always doubt if he married her out of love or because of the baby. Maggie sighed, but didn’t answer.
“Understand?” He pressed.
“Yes.” She fought back tears. “But you should go. You might catch what I have.”
He placed his lips to her forehead. “No. This was our first fight, so I’m not leaving until you’re well enough to have m
ake-up sex.”
“Well, I don’t think that will happen.”
“Okay, you’re officially pissed. I get it. I said the wrong thing. I’m sorry. Are you going to feel like making the trip to Abilene?”
“I hope so. I’m ready to get the house cleaned out and sold. Besides, I’ve taken days off to do it and I don’t want to waste them.”
“Do you want me to bring you something to drink, or crackers? They might help settle your stomach.”
“I don’t know. Maybe.”
“I’ll be right back.”
She flopped over on her back and stared at the ceiling. The room spun. She closed her eyes. Still spinning. She grabbed the trashcan again and vomited one more time.
He came back into the room and scooted next to her. “Here, try to eat a couple of these and drink a little bit. The salt will be good for you.” He pulled the tab on the can and offered it to her. She ate the crackers and drank, then lay back.
He ran his hand over her cheek. She didn’t say anything, but his touch made everything better.
He crawled back into bed, gathered her in his arms again and in a few minutes she fell asleep.
By noon, the nausea was gone and she and Jace left for Abilene. Before they arrived at her mother’s house, Maggie remembered there was no food to speak of, so they stopped by the grocery store. On the way to the truck, Jace fished in his pocket for keys, when someone called his name.
“Jace Sloan? Oh my God, it is you.”
Maggie turned in the direction of the nasal acknowledgement given by the blond, blue-eyed beauty. Jace abandoned the key search and slipped his hand around Maggie’s waist.
“You don’t remember me, do you?” Blondie asked, but didn’t give him time to answer.
“Chi Omega party. Two years ago. Cinni—Cinni Thompson.”
“Oh. Cinni. Sure.” He hugged Maggie tighter.
“What are you doing in Abilene? Visiting?”
“Yeah. I’m here with my girlfriend. This is Maggie. Maggie—Cinni.”
Maggie offered a fake smile. “Nice to meet you.”
“Likewise. And good to see you again, Jace. Got to run. Mom’s doing early baking for Christmas and needs this stuff.”