ArousingMemories

by Samantha Cayto

  And it might work still, she assured herself. Or, maybe Sev would have more luck. The thought set her teeth on edge, although if she was honest with herself, she was not sure whether it was the idea of Sev being with Noah or the idea of Noah being with Sev that pissed her off. All she knew was her ex-lover was way too happy and had been since five o’-fucking-clock in the morning when they started. The guy slouched in his chair, sipped lazily on his third mug of coffee and grinned while watching the tourist cam. She cracked.

  “Stop that!” she barked at him, hitting the pause button on the video.

  With eyebrows raised, he turned to look at her. “Stop what?” His innocent act revved her up even more.

  “The grinning, the sipping, the cheerfulness, the whole thing. Just knock it off.” She knew she sounded like a lunatic, but couldn’t help it.

  “Sorry, sugar, didn’t mean to get on your nerves.”

  She huffed out a breath, straining for calm and coming up empty. “Everything gets on my nerves at this hour of the day, especially after four hours of watching videos. It should get on your nerves too,” she snapped back.

  Instead of showing remorse, he widened his grin. “What can I say? Blowjobs relax me for hours afterward. You of all people should remember.”

  Oh God, he didn’t just say that! Knowing he pushed her buttons for entertainment, trying to make her blow her top by mentioning his blowjob, she retaliated by turning the tables. “What I remember,” she bit out with as much disdain as she could muster, “is you falling asleep after getting yours and leaving me high and dry.”

  That killed his smirk, but he wasn’t done with her by a long shot. “Never happened, and you know it. I always left you in a puddle of your own juices, too tired to even think about getting off again.”

  She shrugged in response and returned her gaze to the video screen. “If that’s how you choose to remember it.”

  She was being an utter ninny. They had work to do and what difference did it make if Sev played again with Noah. It might work and it was all to the good. She forced herself to concentrate on the task at hand, remembering lives were at stake. Sev didn’t retort back, fortunately. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see he once more checked out the footage. Long seconds ticked by before the primitive part of Haley’s brain took over her tongue again.

  “Noah gave you a blowjob?” she heard herself ask and winced inside. Saying it in a businesslike voice didn’t make the question any smarter, but there it was.

  Sev didn’t seem to mind it, though. “Only after I gave him one.”

  She focused on keeping her voice even and tried not to show how affected she was by the news and still not sure which part of these two men hooking up bothered her. “As long as you didn’t overtax him.”

  Sev snorted. “As compared to your playing grab-ass with him in the pool? No, I don’t think I overtaxed him.”

  “Oh!” Once more pausing the video, she rose up from her chair, hands flat against the tabletop. “No one was supposed to be by the pool while he swam except me. I can’t believe you spied on us.” Part of her was enraged at the thought, but another part, a deeper, darker part, was kind of titillated. She ruthlessly ignored the sensation and put as much mad as she could in her face.

  Sev was right there with her, on his feet. He leaned within inches of her face. “Yeah, that’s what I want,” he fumed. “To watch you fuck another man, that’s how I get my kicks, seeing him touch you all over, seeing him take one of your rosy nipples in his mouth and suck it to a hard point. I love watching him run his hands down your back to cup your soft, round ass and squeeze it with his lucky fingers. I particularly love it when his hard cock gets to dive right into your hot core and make you scream. Yes ma’am, that’s my idea of a fine afternoon.”

  His voice had softened as he finished, sounding hurt and almost catching on his words. As they stood staring each other down, Haley had trouble taking in air. Her heart pounded, and her chest strained with quick breaths. It wasn’t anger, though, that had worked her into such a state. It was Sev’s words and the look in his eyes. The image he painted was not of her with Noah, or any other man. It was of him, Severin Blake, playing her body to perfection, making her wet and wild and relaxed. She had lied. He’d never left her wanting.

  She wanted him now, then and there, and the wanting would make her weep if she didn’t get herself under control. If she was going to do that, she needed to stop peering into this man’s eyes because all she saw there was wanting, too. He looked at her with such need, such longing, her resistance to him cracked. At the moment, she couldn’t recall for the life of her why she had ever left this man. Without conscious thought, she leaned closer to him, her eyes shifting to his lips. Full, strong, inviting, she wanted a taste. Just a taste. Closing her eyes, she drifted to him and let her mouth touch his.

  A spark, a small one, pricked her flesh where it met his. It spread from there throughout her body. It warmed her, it relaxed her. And wanting a little bit more, she probed his lips with her tongue and pushed past them. He welcomed her into his moist warmth that tasted of coffee and Sev. She hadn’t tasted the combination in so many months. It was delicious. His tongue swirled with hers in greeting and chased it out of his mouth so that he could enter hers. Before she realized it, they clung to each other, kissing deeply and moaning. But his fingers tugged at her hair, and she came to her senses.

  What were they doing?

  Haley broke contact abruptly and stumbled as she righted herself. Hands flat on the table, Sev stared back at her wide-eyed. “Holy shit!”

  Good old Sev, always ready with an appropriate quip. Holy shit, indeed. “That was a mistake,” she lectured and felt instantly stupid, given how she had initiated the kiss.

  Sev stood upright and ran his hands through his hair. “Mistake, right,” he echoed in an irritated tone. “Well, if it’s any consolation, you’ve managed to get rid of my BJ happy.”

  “It’s not,” she retorted. They were both silent for a few seconds, not looking at each other. She needed to get things back under control. They had a job to do, and grating on each other’s nerves and longing for what was gone and wasn’t coming back was not only stupid, it was insupportable under the circumstances. “I apologize,” she bit out. “I was out of line.”

  “No, I was.” His voice was firmer, yet calmer. “I wasn’t spying on you and Noah. It was pure supposition on my part.”

  “You were right, though.” She admitted it because there was no reason to hide it. They weren’t a couple anymore. They weren’t in love anymore. Don’t say it, she warned herself. Liar, the tiny voice said anyway. She took a deep breath for courage. “It’s not working. What I’m doing with Noah,” she clarified when Sev looked at her sharply. “My having sex with him has gone nowhere. Maybe, ah, maybe you’ll have better luck.” Wow, that was tough to get out. Still, it was the right thing to do as team leader. The mission was all that mattered.

  Sev shrugged. “I haven’t so far.” He continued quickly when she opened her mouth to speak. “I’ll keep trying in any event. And I’m assuming you will, too.” She nodded because she was going to keep trying. It still might work. “Fair enough. Look, why don’t you go take some downtime with him. I can look at these videos by myself.”

  Haley was torn. She didn’t like shirking duties, yet being with Noah could be the key to success. Sev was right, too. It didn’t take them both to watch videos and, what she really itched to do was go out into the field. Her people were all good, and yet she wanted a close look with her own eyes. Noah would have to wait.

  “Okay. Call me if you see anything interesting or need something. I’m going out for a while before checking in on Noah.”

  Sev’s eyes narrowed. “Not exactly what I suggested.”

  Arrogant man. “No,” she replied with deliberate patience. “However, as team leader, I’ve decided Lexington deserves a more personal look.”

  “Why Lexington?”

  She rubbed the back
of her neck. “My gut tells to me to go there. These guys are pretty elemental in their thinking. Every schoolkid learns about the Battle of Lexington and Concord. Lexington always gets top billing and it’s where the first American men fell. I think they’d appreciate the martyr symbolism.”

  Sev nodded. “They do think of themselves as martyrs, the little creeps. Okay, let’s go.”

  Oh, crap. “No, no, Sev, I said I was going. You volunteered to watch the videos.”

  “I can do it when we get back. They’re not going anywhere, and you’ve given strict orders for operatives to go out in pairs, remember?”

  Oh, crap, again. He had her on a technicality. “Fine, but I’m driving.” With a toss of her head, Haley left the room with Sev a weighty presence at her back.

  * * * * *

  Sev probably needed his head examined. If he weren’t some kind of mental case, why would he torture himself by tagging along after Haley like a devoted puppy? Noah with his amnesia was perfectly normal in comparison. Still, Haley being out alone where there could be danger would certainly cause him to lose his mind, so on balance coming with her was the saner choice. Damn, though, he could still feel her lips, still taste the sweetness of her tongue and smell the clean fragrance of her skin. Why had she kissed him? Good question. A better one was, why had he let her stop? Because getting involved with her again would only lead to trouble. Neither of them had changed, which meant their problems hadn’t changed either.

  As he crossed Massachusetts Avenue, he kept a steady eye on her. She stood in front of the monument dedicated to the eight men killed initially by the British. Other people, families mostly, milled about, too. Nothing and no one looked suspicious. Nevertheless, his tension eased once he reached her side. She didn’t look at him, pretending to be absorbed by the names of the fallen. He wasn’t fooled, though. He knew she was as acutely aware of their surroundings as he was.

  “Here you go, sugar. One small strawberry cone.”

  Haley looked at him with raised eyebrows. “It’s not even lunchtime yet.”

  “So? It’s summer, this is ice cream. It’s never wrong to eat ice cream in the summer. It’s never wrong to eat ice cream period.” He gave her his most ingratiating grin.

  “Says the man who never has to worry about his weight.”

  He waggled the cone in front of her. “It’s your favorite flavor.”

  She hesitated one more second and her eyes narrowed before she took the ice cream. “You needn’t have gone to such trouble, dear,” she said with false sweetness. “Really.” Her voice hardened, as did her stare. But her tongue slipped out to lick slowly around the ice cream. Her eyelids dropped to half-mast with the first taste. Low blow, but he ignored the heat that flared in his belly.

  Instead, he chuckled. “It was no problem. We’re on vacation, after all.” He dared to slip his arm around her waist, hugging her close. If they were going to pretend to be tourists, they may as well act like it. Her warm body against his own sent his temperature up. He took a big bite of his ice cream and welcomed the pain of the inevitable brain freeze.

  Happily, Haley gave only a token effort to escape his grasp before relaxing into him. “You’ll spoil me, darling,” she cooed. Her eyes, though, were darting about. “I don’t know, Sev,” she said in a low voice. “Taking out this iconic monument would certainly make a statement, and if it’s a big enough explosion, it could take out a few dozen people, maybe more.”

  He agreed. The statue was in a grassy triangle where a few roads came together. If you were there to look at it, a few head nods would suffice. The grassy common area adjacent to it, however, might have many people milling about. The Sons were into body counts as well as symbolism. This was a viable spot. “I can see it happening, although there’s not a good place to hide a bomb.”

  “You’re right. It was only a hunch, of course. There are other places just as or more likely.” She sighed, her chest rose and fell hard.

  Standing there, eating ice cream, holding her was so perfect. He wished he had the right to do it all the time, and he hated the frustration in her voice. He hated her worry. “Your hunches are good, as I recall, and as we don’t have anything better to go on, you may as well listen to your gut. Put a couple of people here for a round-the-clock detail.”

  She took a delicate bite out of her cone. “Yeah,” she said around the mouthful. “I guess it makes as much sense as anything else we’re doing. The ice cream is good,” she added, sticking the tip of her pink tongue inside the cone.

  “Handmade,” he confirmed and with a hard swallow, looked away. God, he wished he could suck the ice cream off her tongue. But they had tried kissing not an hour ago, and Haley had regretted it. A mistake, or so she said. He didn’t know if she truly meant it. He only knew he didn’t regret it.

  They stood together a few minutes more, neither speaking again until Haley popped the last of her cone in her mouth. She pulled away from him and he reluctantly let her go, watching her lick her fingers clean in yet another provocative move. Damn, the woman made his blood sing.

  “We should get back,” she said. “I need to check in on Noah and you need to watch the rest of the videos.”

  “Right.” The plan was sound and he had made the suggestion about seeing Noah. So why did the thought her being with the other man poke at his gut? She watched him as if expecting him to say something more. There was nothing more for him to say, though. He turned and headed for their car without a backward glance.

  * * * * *

  “Haley!”

  She grimaced briefly in frustration before turning around to face Sev. Damnation, she had almost made it out without him noticing. “What?” She tried to sound bored, as if he had caught her making a run for takeout.

  He stopped a few feet away and eyed her up and down. “Where are you going?”

  Crossing her arms, she stared him down. “Nowhere you need to know about.”

  “Bullshit! You’re packing.”

  “I’m always packing. So are you and everyone else in this organization. No one steps a foot outside without being armed. Hell, we stay armed even inside this place.”

  With a flick of his wrist, he flipped open her windbreaker to reveal her shoulder holster carrying her semiautomatic, and the sidearm at her waist. He tapped her left ankle with his right foot and hit the knife sheathed there. He repeated the exercise with her right ankle to confirm her clutch piece was in place.

  “You don’t normally pack that much heat, sugar,” he drawled.

  “Pack heat? What is this, a James Cagney movie?”

  “I calls ‘em like I sees ‘em. You’re not going out for more ice cream, are you, Haley?” He crossed his arms and narrowed his gaze.

  For about two seconds, she considered bluffing her way through. But this was Sev. He wouldn’t believe anything other than the truth. “I’m going to take another look at the warehouse.”

  Sev smacked his palm against his forehead and blew out a short breath. “The one where you found Noah and Markowitz?”

  “Yes.”

  Several seconds ticked by as they stood staring at each other. Finally, he responded and the strain in his voice demonstrated how hard he was fighting the urge to blow his stack. “You have never been stupid, Haley.”

  She reined in her indignation. Bickering with this man as if they were in high school was the reaction he wanted. With a cool voice, she said, “By which I assume you mean because I didn’t ask you to come with me, I must be stupid.”

  “It didn’t have to be me,” he practically shouted. “You should take someone, anyone, with you.”

  “What makes you think I’m not?” She recognized the foolishness of her response, yet couldn’t keep it back.

  “I know all the schedules of the operatives on this mission. Everyone is occupied elsewhere for the night.”

  “Which is exactly why I don’t have anyone coming with me.”

  “You could have asked me.” There was a look in his eyes that
was more than anger. He was upset and even hurt.

  She let a sigh slip out. “I don’t think we should be together very much. We seem to have trouble keeping it strictly professional between us. I simply want to review what’s left at that place in case we missed something. It’s a long shot, but I can’t stand not doing anything while the clock keeps ticking away.”

  It was Sev’s turn to sigh. “Yeah, I hear you about how it is between us. I tell myself I’m not going to touch you, and yet I still do. I promise, though, I won’t tonight. Jesus, we’re going to the location where one of our own was tortured to death. That thought alone will keep me focused. Besides, I’ll be there to watch your back. Nothing is more important to me than keeping you safe.”

  The words, so sweetly and simply stated, made her heart do a slow roll in her chest. He was right, too, damn it all. As unlikely as it was for any of the Sons to being hanging around their old meeting place, doing recon in pairs was always the sensible thing.

  “Okay,” she agreed, the reluctance there in her tone despite her best intentions.

  Sev hesitated a second as if unable to believe she’d given in so easily. “Okay?” When she nodded, he said, “Give me a few minutes to arm up.”

  An hour later, Haley and Sev sat in the car she had parked on a quiet side street. They peered at the burnt-out remains of the warehouse, now roped off with hazard tape. Night had fallen and the area was deserted. She had waited for this time deliberately in order to have as few prying eyes as possible. Of course, the darkness made looking around harder, too. The idea was as long a shot as they came. Their CSI people had poured over the site for hours after the explosion occurred. The chance they had missed something she would spot in the dark was negligible. Still, it was better than twiddling her thumbs back at headquarters waiting for Noah’s memories to come back or for someone to find something.