by Jess Bryant
It was sneaky and dishonest but it was in no way the worst thing he had ever done. He’d do far worse to protect her. He already had.
Chapter Three
She could only assume the big man upstairs was having a good long laugh at this turn of events. Not only was she broke and stranded, reduced to running home to a place that was no longer home, but she was now at the mercy of the last man on earth she’d ever hoped to see again. Well, after recent events Hoyt had smoothly transitioned into first place of that race but the menacing man-beast beside her still ran a close second.
Jemma squirmed in the passenger seat of the tow truck, trying to find a comfortable position. It was impossible. Her entire body was sore and she ached, physically as much as emotionally. She was bruised and dirty, irreparably damaged, and yet somehow, amid all of that, more than anything she was embarrassed.
She hated that he was seeing her like this. Hated that flash of pity she’d seen in his eyes on the side of the road. Hated that it had taken her less than a handful of minutes in his presence for her pride to falter and the tears that she had sworn were under control to break free. She hated that she’d clung to him like a lifeline when Cash Bomar was the furthest thing from a safe zone imaginable.
She pretended she didn’t feel his eyes on her as he put the truck into gear and got them on the road. She’d known she had bad luck but this was a little extreme. The first boy she’d ever opened herself up to, trusted and loved, the same boy that had ripped her heart out and sent her fleeing their small hometown only five short years ago, was the man her guardian angel had sent to save her.
Cash was no angel though. Far from it. She knew that. There was no halo lurking over his handsome head, dusty or otherwise. He might not have horns and a pointy tail but then again, the devil himself had once been God’s most beautiful angel hadn’t he?
Even knowing that, it was impossible not to notice that he’d grown into his good looks. He’d always been handsome in a rough, reckless sort of way. With his square jaw, dented chin and boyish dimples he was all hard angles and unexpected softness. His hair was a shade darker, sandy brown with natural streaks of gold. It was longer too, tumbling over his forehead in that haphazard way that made a girl itch to push it back out of his eyes.
Because his eyes were beautiful pools of sparkling blue intensity. Whoever had said that eyes were the windows to the soul must have been talking about Cash because his held all the secrets he thought were so well hidden. It was those eyes that had given him away when he’d been trying so hard to convince her and the world at large that he was an asshole and it was his eyes that even now, hinted he cared more than he should.
“Jemma?”
She strangled a whimper at the sound of her name in that deeply familiar voice, and refused to meet his probing gaze, “You said we didn’t have to talk.”
A heavy sigh filled the cab of the truck and she fought a glance as he shifted in the seat next to her. They were too close. This close to him she could feel his body heat and she had to fight against the lulling sense of safety his distinctive masculine scent created. Soap and sweat shouldn’t have been sexy, particularly not after what she’d been through, but somehow Cash broke through all of that.
He broke through everything; he always had.
“You don’t have to tell me what happened but…”
“I already told you. I fell down a flight of stairs.” She lied even though she knew he didn’t believe her.
How could he? If there was one person on the face of the planet that knew what abuse looked like, it had to be Cash. She knew his history. She knew his family. Which meant he knew what a black eye from the swing of a fist looked like. She pulled the cuffs of her long sleeve t-shirt down to her fingers, ensuring the marks on her arms were covered.
She expected him to yell at her for lying. The Cash she’d known would have. His temper might not have been as quick to ignite as some of his other family members’ but it was still there. She’d seen the flare of anger in every fiber of his big, muscular body when he’d realized she was hurt and maybe that should have scared her after what Hoyt had done but it hadn’t.
Because she knew Cash wasn’t that type. He’d never scared her with his size or his temper. The things he made her feel however, those things had always scared her.
She was far more worried about the weakness inside her when it came to Cash than she was his violent nature. She’d been so certain that after what he did she could hate him forever, but one glimpse of his concern had opened up some dark well of emotions she’d thought was sealed shut. He’d tugged her against his hard chest, offered comfort, and that chasm had widened into something with sharp, dangerous edges when he offered to hurt whoever had hit her, no questions asked.
“You don’t have to lie to me, Jem.”
She bit her lip then winced because she’d forgotten it was busted again, “I don’t have to tell you the truth either.”
That earned her another heavy sigh and she fought the urge to curl against him and accept the comfort he offered. What was that? She hated him. She did. She’d spent a lot of time and energy turning her feelings against him after what he had done. She couldn’t take comfort in the arms of a man that had lashed out at her with words just because another one had lashed out at her with his fists.
“No. I guess you don’t.”
They rolled down the highway in silence for a couple of miles and she stared out the window as darkness closed in all around her. It was all so strangely familiar. Nothing had changed. The same flat, dusty plains stretched out on either side of her and if she closed her eyes and let the equally familiar scent of Cash envelope her then she could almost pretend that she was just an innocent teenage girl riding around with the boy she loved.
Almost. She opened her eyes and blew out a long breath. But not quite.
“Where do you need me to drop you?”
She jerked to face him at that question, “Uh, the garage?”
“Garage’ll be closed by the time we get back into town.” His eyes narrowed, “I can drop your car for Auto to take a look at but tomorrow’s Sunday so I can’t make any promises he’ll get to it. You can check on it Monday. Where are you staying in the meantime?”
Her throat tightened as that now familiar panic began to claw at her. She hadn’t thought this through that far. She’d only let herself think of her next move. Use the phone to call a tow truck before it went dead, get to town, then she’d told herself she would figure things out from there. Now, town was closing in, she was stuck in a truck with a man she was supposed to hate and she was at a loss for how to answer that particular question.
“Uh…”
“Are you staying with Skylar?”
She softened slightly at the mention of her best friend and the fact that Cash knew that was where she’d been headed. He’d known her once, known her better than anyone, so of course he’d know that. She hated that he still knew her so well.
“Yeah, well, no…” She groaned, “I haven’t been able to reach her to let her know I’m coming. You know how she is about her phone.”
“I’ve heard.”
Her curiosity got the better of her, “You’ve heard?”
He shot a dark look at her out of the corner of his eye, “Yeah, I’ve heard. Me and Skylar, we don’t exactly sit around eating ice cream and reading each other’s diaries but I’ve heard.”
A laugh escaped her before she could pull it back and she quickly covered her mouth. Laughter. My God, how long had it been since she laughed? Too damn long, she decided, shooting a suspicious gaze at the man that had managed to pull it out of her with nothing more than a snide remark. This man had far too much power over her emotions. He always had.
He smiled softly, his eyes drifting over her before returning to the road, “You think that’s funny?”
“Yes.” She confirmed with a nod.
“She’s a good friend to you. Threatened to cut off my, what did she call it, my manhoo
d I think it was. Hasn’t spoken to me since unless you count doubling down on her threat.”
She almost laughed again, “Like you said, she’s a good friend.”
“The girl can hold a helluva grudge. She hates me. Crosses to the other side of the street when I pass. So no, I’m not personally aware of her phone habits but yeah, I’ve heard she has a tendency to lose the thing almost daily.”
“Heard from who?”
“Colt.”
Hearing his brother’s name felt like a punch to the gut. Cash and Colt. They were a set, a pair. You couldn’t have one without the other. They even looked exactly alike. But they’d never been exactly alike, not to her, not until they’d both broken her heart. The memory of that one awful day still stung but it was a good time for a reminder of what they’d done before she softened towards Cash out of some misplaced sense of nostalgia.
“Oh...” She fidgeted, trying to figure out why Colt would know Skylar’s phone habits, “That’s weird.”
“Weird?” His eyebrows winged up as he shot her a sideways glance, “What’s that mean?”
“Doesn’t mean anything.” She sighed when his tone went defensive, “I don’t even know why I’m pretending to make small talk with you like we’re friends or something. We know the same people. That’s it.”
That darkened his frown to a scowl, “We know the same people? You’ve gotta be kidding me with that shit. Jem, we know each other in every way two people can.”
“No. We don’t. You don’t know a thing about me, not anymore.”
“Is that so?”
“Yeah. That’s so.” She rolled her eyes when he growled at her.
“Bullshit.”
“Bullshit?”
“Yeah. Bullshit. I know you.” He kept talking when she started to cut him off, raising his voice to speak over her, “I know you’re stubborn as hell and you always have to have the last word. I know that you never, ever cry and I know that something horrible must have happened to send you running home or you wouldn’t be here.”
She huffed out a breath, “I do not always have to have the last word.”
“Jem…”
“And you’re not exactly a genius for figuring out something horrible happened. My face looks like somebody used it for target practice.”
His eyes narrowed, “So you admit somebody hit you now?”
“Stairs. I fell down a flight of stairs.”
“I’m going to kill that fucking flight of stairs.” Cash grumbled as he tapped the brakes and they eased past the welcome sign at the edge of Old Settlers.
Jemma took a deep breath, let it out and forced herself not to prove him right by saying anything else. He didn’t know her. He couldn’t. She’d been gone five years. She wasn’t the same girl she had been when he had known her. Too much had changed, she had changed.
She touched her lip, aware that she’d bit it again and the cut had split open. She dabbed it as they rode in silence, trying to stem the bleeding. She kept her profile turned to the side but she could feel him watching her again when his eyes should have been on the road.
“Here.” He tapped her shoulder so that she would turn back to him, “Here. Use this.”
“Thanks.” She took the napkin he offered and pressed it to her mouth.
She hated that he was being so nice to her. It made it hard to hold onto her hate. And she needed her hate. It was a comforting thing that had kept her company for too long to abandon her now when she needed it most.
He wasn’t looking at her anymore and for that much, she was grateful. She pulled her gaze off him as well. She silently hated herself for noticing the way his muscles filled out the simple gray t-shirt he was wearing. She should definitely not be noticing that right now.
She forced herself to take in her surroundings as he turned off the highway and into town instead. Old Settlers had never been one of those pretty, Norman Rockwell type of towns. There was no picturesque main street with little shops and parks. It was a dusty old oil town that had been slowly trying to die for half a century but never quite succeeded in fading out of existence because there was nowhere else for the people that lived here to go.
It was a tiny map dot set just off the highway that most people didn’t even notice when they passed. There were a couple of convenience stores for the travelers that did. There were two diners, both family owned, and neither serving anything that resembled a health-food option and one shady, backwoods bar. There was the school, the bank and the post office in the center of town. A handful of small salons had popped up and were only outnumbered by the selection of churches. The small grocery store they passed was new, as was the liquor store next to it.
There was also the one auto shop on the edge of town. It was a gigantic, dusty, tin building that she had forgotten was owned by a member of the Bomar family. Not many of them were big on working, one of the numerous running jokes about the family throughout town. For the most part they were criminals or bums, but for some reason she wasn’t surprised Cash hadn’t turned out like that.
She sighed when her gaze automatically drifted back to him. She’d known him since elementary school because that was the way things worked in a town like Old Settlers. He and Colt had been impossible to ignore even then. They’d disrupted class, caused trouble, and eventually become the bad boys that every single girl crushed on in high school.
She’d told herself she wasn’t one of those girls because she’d been good at lying to herself even back then.
She had crushed on them, on both of them, but it had been Cash that intrigued her even then. Colt was the one that basked in the attention, stood on his desk and caused scenes to be heard but Cash was more subtle. He was the quiet one, the controlled one, and when they’d gotten paired for that stupid paper in English Lit senior year, she’d marveled at the intelligence he’d managed to hide behind his Bomar bravado.
Oh, she had fallen fast and she had fallen hard. The first time he’d kissed her, she remembered thinking that was it. She was done. She’d found her other half. They fit together like two pieces of the same puzzle, despite all of their differences they were same. They’d wanted the same things, or at least she’d thought they did.
When she’d found out it was all a lie, she’d been destroyed. He’d taken her virginity. No, it would be easier if she could say he’d taken it but he hadn’t. She’d given it to him. She’d given him her heart as well.
She’d told him that she loved him but he hadn’t said it back. In fact, he’d told her that she was stupid to love him, that she was a stupid, naïve little girl with no idea how the real world worked. He’d pushed her away and when she did the clingy, needy thing that any teenage girl in love did and begged him to love her in return, he’d told her his own version of their relationship.
He didn’t love her. He didn’t care about her. He’d taken her virginity just to see if he could, because the good girl wasn’t quite so squeaky clean after he’d touched her with his dirty Bomar hands. He’d laughed at her dream of them being together forever. The sound of that laughter still haunted her, as did the image of him turning and walking out while she was still naked and in shock.
He had proven himself right. Loving him had been stupid and idealistic. She’d fallen in love with an idea that didn’t exist, a Bomar boy that was kind and sweet and had a heart. But he’d been no better than the rest of his family. He’d been vicious and heartless and cruel. He was trash and he’d treated her just the same way.
Turns out, she had a type.
Tears welled in her eyes again and she curled up in the passenger seat, pulling her knees to her chest and trying to hide a sniffle against her kneecaps. Damn it, he’d been right about that other thing too. She wasn’t a crier and she hated that he’d already seen her do it once tonight. She wouldn’t let him catch her a second time, particularly not since this round had more to do with him than it should.
“Jemma?”
She swiped at her cheek, “What?”
<
br /> “I need to know where I’m going. You mentioned Skylar but...”
“But?” She pulled her head up to look at him when he trailed off.
“She’s not home, Jem. She went out of town a couple of days ago.” He winced when he glanced her way and then looked back at the road, “You don’t have any reason to believe me, to believe that I would know that I guess, but I do. She was in the garage earlier this week and she mentioned she was going camping over at the falls this weekend.”
She rolled her eyes at that, “Camping? Skylar? No way.”
“That guy she’s been seeing? Trey something? He’s a big outdoorsman type. Hunting. Camping. Fishing. The whole thing. She might not talk to me but he does.” Cash shrugged, “He was with her at the garage.”
Damn it, she frowned when she realized he was right about that too. Skylar had mentioned a new boyfriend. She’d started dating some rig hand that her older brother Owen had dragged to town like a stray. The last time they’d talked Skylar mentioned he wanted her to go camping and they’d laughed endlessly about her attempting to traverse the wilderness in the four inch heels she preferred.
“Shit.”
“That would explain why she isn’t answering your calls. Even if she didn’t lose her phone, there’s not much service out by the falls.”
She glared at Cash when he sounded apologetic, “You’re just now remembering all of this?”
“I was going to mention it earlier but you didn’t want to talk. Now we’re here and I need to know, do you have a way into Skylar’s apartment or do you need somewhere else to stay?”
Skylar wasn’t just ignoring her calls. She wasn’t here. She wasn’t around. She couldn’t save her if Jemma couldn’t even get in touch with her. The last of her options slipped through her fingers and her brain shut down. The tears she’d been fighting fell down her cheeks unchecked.
This was it. She’d hit the end of her road. She had nothing and nobody. She was all alone.