by Max Lockwood
“Neither do I want to know. You were the one that brought him here, Clara, do you even know what that means?”
Clara felt herself bristle at the challenge in her sister’s voice, though she faltered a little when her eyes turned back to Jackson, who had his head buried in his teddy bear as his little body shook in heavy sobs.
“I was trying to protect the farm,” Clara argued back, keeping her voice level.
But Tessa didn’t want to hear it. “Whatever, Clara. Right now, you need to get away from Jackson, you’re scaring him.”
The words sent another harsh sting through her chest. Clara backed away, tears streaming down her face. Then she turned and ran the short distance to her room.
Cooper found Clara in their bedroom a while later, her tears still not dried up. She looked up at him and saw his face twist at the obvious despair on hers.
“I shouldn’t have shot that man,” she said quietly. “I know you were thinking it, too. But I let that bastard get to me and I’ve ruined everything.”
Cooper didn’t hesitate to go to her, sitting beside her, but didn’t touch her. She sat holding her knees to her chest and her shoulders hunched, her body language clearly telling him to keep away, and she was glad that, despite his worry, he didn’t.
Because Clara didn’t deserve comfort after what she’d done. There was some grain of truth to what Tessa had said, Clara had been the one to bring Jackson to the farm, she was the one playing as his guardian, and she should have kept that in mind. The least she could have done was make sure where he was before doing anything so he wouldn’t be exposed to more trauma.
“Clara, you haven’t,” Cooper said soothingly.
But Clara shook her head and listed the consequences: “The people of Mawdsley will hunt us down, Jackson is afraid of me, and Tessa is angry. And I know you were uncomfortable. How have I not ruined everything?”
“Then we’ll fix everything, I promise.”
“Some things just can’t be fixed,” she hissed at him, getting angry.
Cooper was always like that, ever the optimist, until it came to himself. It made Clara wonder how he viewed the world sometimes, because it must be completely different from her own view.
He sighed, frustration bleeding into his voice. “Pull yourself together, Clara—people are counting on you to get them through this, and you need to be a good leader. You heard what those guys said, they’ll be coming back with more people and with weapons. We need to be prepared.”
Clara scoffed, because he’d been the one so adamant about staying out of their attackers’ way before. He’d gotten annoyed with her when she insisted on them fighting back. Of course, back then, they didn’t have any weapons, and it was just her, her grandmother, her sister, and Dante. While she didn’t like the circumstances that had him living at her place, he’d proven invaluable at the time.
But then she deflated.
“I’m tired of being strong, Cooper. I really don’t think I can do it anymore. Listening to the men responsible for Viola’s death hurt so badly, I couldn’t help myself. How could I be a good leader when I let my emotions get the better of me so easily?”
“I know, Clara, and I know it was hard. And, to be honest, I wanted to hurt the man for the way he was looking at you, the way he spoke to you. I didn’t, but because of that, I can’t fault you, even if it was a little extreme. But now you need to channel your anger and help us win the fight against Mawdsley. Can you do that?”
Can you do that? That was a ridiculous question. She might no longer be interested in being leader, but that wasn’t to say she was going to let those bastards off easy.
Every time they appeared, they just had to ruin everything, and Clara wasn’t going to let them get their way anymore. Not after losing her grandmother and getting driven from her home. Not with her new family here on this farm, after they’d threatened them. After they’d made her do something that had her sibling and a boy she was coming to think of as her own child turn against her.
She might just be running from responsibility again by focusing on revenge, but this time was different. Then, Cooper had promised to go along with her, but she knew he disapproved. He might as well be giving her permission not to hold back this time.
Of course, she understood why. He was afraid for all of them, and for the boy. Because Cooper might look for ways to escape violence altogether, but he was as protective of what was theirs as she was. She could tell, just by looking at his face, that he would not stand in her way this time, or treat her differently after. She didn’t plan to disappoint him.
Clara took a few deep breaths and allowed the anger to fill her. She gritted her teeth, resolved.
“I’ll do whatever I can.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Clara gathered everyone on the farm in the living room.
It was still relatively early, and they all still had duties to attend to, but everything else could wait. Though they’d had to go out to call everyone back, they were all assembled maybe an hour or so later.
The ones that hadn’t been there when their visitors came looked confused, wondering what this was about. Tessa was still with Jackson and had refused to come for the meeting. Clara was fine with that, because neither of them really needed to hear it, and she appreciated the distance from her sister. Alice’s kids had been left with Michelle to look after them, since they were older, and their parents wanted to be part of the discussions. All the other adults were present, even Audrey was joining them.
“For those of you that don’t know,” she started. “We had some visitors. They were from Mawdsley.”
The ones that had been with her, when they were leading the attack on Mawdsley, understood immediately, and their faces looked grim. Alice didn’t understand, though, but Clara knew from her cautious expression that she could read the atmosphere and knew it meant nothing good.
“Are you sure, Clara?” Felicia asked, voice grim.
Clara gave her a sharp nod. They were the only two that had seen the final attack on their town, the one that had prompted them to run. Felicia had been the one driving when they saw what happened, and she’d been the one to drive away when all Clara could do was stare. They had to run, because their numbers were too great, and they all had weapons, and there hadn’t been even ten in their own party then.
“Even if they hadn't told us, I recognized one of them. Felicia, they were at the hospital. Or at least one of them.”
It took her a moment to realize what Clara meant, but then her face hardened. Clara had known she would have Felicia in her corner regardless, but that just cemented it for her. Felicia resented them more for what they did at the hospital than she did.
“You recognized him,” she said rhetorically.
Clara nodded anyway.
“What do you want us to do?” she asked immediately.
Clara glanced at the rest of the room. The ones that had been confused before had dawning expressions. They could guess that there was a threat, at least.
“They came here looking for a trade deal,” she started to explain. “Until I told Jack the truth about them, and he allowed me to refuse the deal.”
She paused to shoot a glance at Jack, who was busy looking at the ground and acting like he wasn’t listening. She knew he heard every word, though. She could practically feel his disapproval, because he knew the decision she would come to. And while Clara understood his stance, he understood hers. She was glad he at least let her speak, but everything would hinge on his decision. Clara wasn’t willing to go against him, so all she could hope was that he would change his mind.
“It isn’t a bad thing if they were just looking for a trade deal, is it?” someone asked, unsure. “I mean, if we just dealt with them and did the exchange, they would leave us alone?”
“They wouldn’t,” Felicia answered before Clara could. “They’d keep coming back for more, and eventually we’d have to refuse them.”
Clara nodded. “I don’t
want to wait for that time, when our own stores are low, for them to start a fight, because I’m sure any kind of deal will end in a fight, anyway. They aren’t people to be trusted. Felicia and I saw one of them at the hospital, back home. They came to steal meds from us, and they were armed and with a car, so there was nothing we could do against them. I don’t think this time will be any different, they’ll just attack sooner because we refused to deal with them.”
She shared a look with Felicia, and knew the other woman agreed with her that they would have to fight them eventually, and it would be better to get it out of the way sooner before they lost anything to the bastards.
“They’ll be coming back, and the second time around, there won’t be anything peaceful about their arrival. We need to stand up for ourselves and fight these guys from Mawdsley, the people who drove us out of our homes and destroyed our lives.”
Felicia seemed enthused, but many of the others seemed nervous. It was understandable, because they didn’t know the extent of what happened back home, besides that they’d needed to run, and they had.
Michelle’s face suddenly showed signs of recognition, and Clara gained some new respect for her, because she was sure the other woman had understood her and Felicia’s viewpoint.
“It was them, wasn’t it? The reason you showed up on my doorstep and suddenly said we needed to leave home in a hurry.”
Clara nodded again. “Yeah. It wasn’t a fight Felicia thought we’d win, and honestly, I was kind of afraid of going up against them.”
“Is it really worth doing this, though? We don’t need to make enemies, right?”
The question was from Dante, but he wasn’t one of the nervous ones. He just looked curious, and Clara knew he was up for the fight even without him making it obvious. Michelle, standing strong at his side, probably felt the same.
“If we don’t, we won’t survive,” Clara reminded them.
Of course, they all knew about the various attacks that had gone on, but for the first time, Clara wondered if they knew just how serious the whole thing had been. After all, hearing and actually being there had different impacts on people. They probably thought like Jack had in the beginning, that they could come to some sort of compromise. And maybe they could, Jack’s farm did have a lot of crops, but that depended on how many people there were still in Mawdsley, and their overall greed.
“Isn’t this a little overkill, Clara?” Cooper asked, but even as he said the words, he was uncertain.
She understood part of his concern. These people would come with guns to attack them, and they had people and children in the house, not to forget Jackson, who seemed to have a fear of guns. It wasn’t going to be an easy task, but Clara didn’t think there was much choice, here.
“Clara and I were in the front,” Felicia said, speaking up for her. “The rest of you didn’t see, and I thought it would be better that way. I don’t think any of you would have made a different decision, because it was definitely not a fight all of us would have walked away from. And even if we’d stayed in our respective homes, the fight would have come to us. Why the hell do you think we ran in the first place?”
There were still some unsure looks, particularly among the people she wasn’t all that familiar with yet.
“The rest of you didn’t see what they were doing to people in our town. They were dragging people out on the streets and lining them up, and we heard gun shots. Do you really think they left anyone alive? Because I have my doubts we could all go on the road again, but then we’d be running forever, and we couldn’t even handle it for a week. Can you seriously see us surviving that way?”
“We should listen to Clara,” Cooper said suddenly. “She’s got us through everything so far. I don’t like the idea, but I like the idea of walking around even less. At least here, we have an advantage, we’re not out in the open and it would be easier to defend.”
Clara could see they were getting convinced, and she almost smiled. Then to her surprise, Jack spoke, and it wasn’t what she wanted to hear.
“I don’t want to be a part of the fight.”
Her mouth dropped, but she couldn’t get any words out for a moment. What did he mean, even after he’d heard everything she said? Or did he just mean he didn’t want to be there for the fight but wouldn’t hold them back?
“Why?” she finally asked.
“I only just got my daughter back, and I don’t want to risk her getting killed. Fights like this never end well, and we are going to be facing casualties if this group is as fearsome as you’re making them out to be.”
“You can’t just sit back and watch them take everything, Jack. We’re defending this place because you invited us here, but all of it is yours, you know. Would you really be okay if it was all just taken?”
She could see from his expression that he didn’t, but she didn’t think that meant he would be okay with the fight, either.
“Why don’t we hit the road?” Jack suggested. “It was my life for years, but I don’t mind leaving it all behind.”
But then Audrey stepped up next to Clara with a stubborn expression. “We aren’t going to run, dad,” she said with finality. “I’m standing with Clara on this—I don’t want everything you’ve worked for to go to waste. You might be okay with losing the house and the farm, but this is my home, too. I only just got back, dad. I don’t want to lose it.”
The others were still reluctant, but Clara could almost see them visibly wearing down, then one of them stepped forward, looking weary but determined.
“We’ll help.”
The same words were echoed by the others, besides Dante, Michelle, and Felicia, because they were a given, until everyone was on board. They would have to explain to Tessa, but like all the previous fights, Clara didn’t expect her sister to be part of the battle. She would sit it out, maybe stay with the kids somewhere safe.
“All right, then,” Clara said with a clap of her hands. “We need to start preparations for this thing, might as well do it early and prepare for an attack any day now. These guys don’t usually take their time, so it’ll probably be soon. Some suggestions?”
Audrey raised her hand with a grim smile. “I have some tricks up my sleeve we can use.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
Clara sat beside Audrey in a tractor. Audrey was holding several homemade bombs.
To say Clara was impressed with Jack’s daughter would be something of an understatement. Clara was beyond impressed at this point at the kind of stuff this woman seemed to know. Clara wasn’t even sure where she’d found enough ingredients lying around to make a homemade bomb. All the ways she knew needed chemicals, the kind Clara wasn’t sure could be found on a farm. She knew those ways only because high school kids tended to be a little too adventurous for their own good.
“How do you know how to make these?” Clara asked in awe as she stared at them warily.
Audrey had offered them to her so she could look at them, but Clara was too afraid to even touch them.
“I studied chemistry, and learned how to make explosives,” Audrey said casually with a shrug. “We didn’t have everything I need, but I improvised, and it’ll be fine. They should help, especially since we’ll be outnumbered.”
“I hope so—we don’t have many other options left.”
It was a day since their visitors came, and there hadn’t been anything since. But they were all on high alert, Clara especially, because the last thing they needed was to get caught unaware. There were people surrounding the house, all of them armed, so from whichever direction their attackers came, her group had some advantage. The numbers were the biggest thing that still worried her.
She didn’t want to think of what would happen if they failed. Tessa was inside the house, and she was with Jackson. Alice’s kids were with Michelle’s in their rooms. They’d decided leaving Jackson in the same room with the other kids when he was so high-strung wouldn’t be a good idea, since they needed the children to remain as calm
as possible.
Her heart clenched, thinking about Jackson. He hadn’t calmed down enough that she could go near him, and she hated that it was her fault he was like that. This situation couldn’t have come at a worse time. If he really had been there when his parents were killed like she’d been thinking, he wasn’t going to be happy at all when guns started firing outside. Even though it irked her a little, she was glad he had accepted Tessa so he didn’t have a problem with her staying with him through the ordeal.
She wouldn’t have been able to stay with him even if he’d wanted her to. Clara wanted to fight; she knew herself too well, and there was no way she could sit out of this fight. It was the revenge she’d gone looking for, and her recent stress and frustration because of the same people had brought back her enthusiasm for the job.
Then they heard the vehicles approaching. Clara felt her eyes widen. They really had come back soon, but they were prepared enough that it wouldn’t be a problem. Her heart was suddenly beating hard and fast in part anxiety, part excitement.
“Everyone, move forward!” Audrey ordered. “Step on the tractor fenders pedals!”
As vehicles raced towards them, everyone lit their Molotov cocktails and threw them at the cars. Clara held her breath as she saw them fly. Audrey really had outdone herself, creating a lot of them, and, as they hit, they all blew.
Three of the five attack cars were destroyed in the chemical attack.
“Fuck, yes!” Audrey cheered, but their victory was short-lived as the others got out of their cars with guns.
Clara reached for her own as their tractor stopped. Audrey didn’t know how to use a gun, so she hadn’t taken one. Instead, she grabbed a knife from her belt, jumped off the tractor, and charged them. Clara grinned at the other woman’s actions, again thinking how very alike they were. She followed her off the tractor and into the thick of the fight. As confident and capable as she seemed, Clara wanted her to come out of this alive, because of how important she was to Jack.