by Ashley Munoz
It was Monday, which meant it was time for me to face the music and call my agent.
Dialing him, I braced myself for the firestorm I was in for. I had ignored him, my producer, and even my publicist. Even with the stories swirling around regarding Bexley and the kids, I ignored everyone because I wanted to stay in the bubble with this new proverbial family I’d adopted into my heart.
They had a dad, but those kids meant so much to me that I’d do anything for them. I was in love with Bexley, so much so that I felt like my heart was shredding in half any time I considered losing her to this career.
“Ryan!” Jerry yelled upon answering.
“Hey Jerry, just calling to check in.”
“Check in?” he scoffed, and I tried to mentally prepare for what was in store. “You’ve ghosted us for weeks, Prince! Fucking weeks! You haven’t returned a single call or email!” Jerry’s voice strained with anger, making me feel shitty.
“I told you I was on vacation,” I reminded him gently, trying to placate him.
“A vacation you were supposed to be off of two weeks ago.”
Yeah, that was true, and technically I should have been in Brazil for pre-production…but I wasn’t ready to leave.
“I know, Jerry. Look, I’m sorry. It’s just…” I tried but failed to come up with the words to explain why I’d been absent from the world. It felt like no amount of words would accurately express my desperate need to be left alone.
“It’s the girl you’ve been seen with, right?” Jerry started, his voice calming a few degrees.
I stared out the window of my condo, watching as the blue sky stretched and branded the world with the last few weeks of summer.
“Yeah, it is. She’s…” I let out a lungful of air. “She’s from my past…the one that got away or whatever.” I waved my hand at nothing, feeling a little embarrassed to get so sentimental, but whatever. It needed to be said.
“Okay…but what does that have to do with you ghosting me?”
“I just needed some time with her…and the kids. They aren’t from this life…the attention and bullshit celebrity lifestyle. They wouldn’t follow me into the spotlight, and I just didn’t want to lose that,” I explained, or at least I tried to.
Silence ensued; Jerry let out a small sigh before he finally spoke up.
“I can understand that, Ryan. Truly, I can…but your contract…” He trailed off. He didn’t need to say anything else.
“I know, and I’ll be there by the end of the week.”
“No, you don’t get it.” Jerry’s voice picked up a notch, something like regret filtering into it. “I had to make some decisions you aren’t going to like, but it was either that or get the lawyers involved,” Jerry explained, his tone switching to that inflection he saved for business meetings and leaving zero room for arguing.
“What does that mean?” I stood up, running my free hand through my hair.
There were a million and one things he might have had to agree to: photo ops, benefit dinners, special appearances. The list was endless, but something in my gut told me I already knew what he had done. His prolonged silence only confirmed it.
“You didn’t,” I muttered on a groan.
“You left me no choice!” he yelled back.
“You always have a fucking choice, Jerry! I’m a human being, not a fucking machine,” I spat back, anger zipping through me like I was a power line.
“I’ll see you for pre-production by the end of the week.” Jerry softened his tone right before he hung up.
Just as I pulled the phone away, about to call him back, the doorbell rang.
28
Work was a bitch. Nothing new there…same old physically demanding bullshit that never changed. It was Monday afternoon, my kids were with Shay for a much-needed pool day—her words, not mine—and the September sun was just as hot as it had been in August. I was in the middle of mopping down pool chairs as mandated by the new health codes, but I had yet to take my lunch break, which had me cranky and hungry. I was counting the chairs, hoping it would move time along a bit faster, when Sondra pushed through the heavy brown door leading to the sports center.
Blinking at the sun, I stared at her confused expression and started toward her.
“Hey, everything okay?” I set down the mop and wiped my brow with my forearm.
Sondra’s hair shifted like a sheet of shimmery blonde paper as she nervously shuffled closer.
“It’s just that Judy is gone…and she left me in charge.”
I blinked. That wasn’t new information; was Sondra having a seizure? I was about to pull my glove free and check her forehead when she cleared her throat, a look of pure terror crossing her petite features.
“Usually when this sort of thing happens, Judy deals with it because she’s in charge and she has a farm, so she’s more comfortable around them.”
“Around who?” I scrunched my brows together as I tried to keep up. What on earth was she talking about?
“The cows. They’re back and I…we have to go round them up.” She gathered her hair off her neck, fanning the skin in rushed pats.
It was time to take the gloves off and get this girl inside. She needed water.
“Look, sweetie, let’s get you out of the sun and then we can talk some more about the…” I froze midsentence. Through the gate surrounding the pool, I saw it. A light brown cow was grazing on the well-manicured grass, like it was the most normal thing in the world.
“What the hell is that?” I pointed, now wondering if I had heat sickness.
A groan erupted from Sondra as she darted toward the exit gate at the end of the patio.
“Hurry, I need help herding them back to the other side,” she shouted over her shoulder.
I ripped the latex gloves off my hands, mop and pool chairs forgotten as I pounded the pavement after her.
“Wait…how many?” My question died on the hot summer air as I ran up toward the parking lot and found three more cows walking around.
“We need to get them away from the private rentals first!” Sondra yelled in terror as she ran toward the end of the road.
“Do I come with you or get these guys somewhere?” I eyed the cows. Two were standing near the bike rentals, one in the parking lot. So far no one had made a fuss about it. It was Oregon; people didn’t usually fuss over cows, but then again…this was a five-star resort.
“Come with me. We have to make sure the VIP guests and owners aren’t affected.” Sondra ran as hard as she could toward the resort condos.
This was good—we could recruit Ryan for help. He was fast and had to have knowledge of cows from growing up here. I hated that I didn’t have my phone with me to warn him of our quick approach as I was nearly positive neither of us would have any air in our lungs left to explain what in the world we were doing.
A few bystanders were coming out of their homes to see the commotion as we found more and more cows up and down the street. They were everywhere. If I had been closer to Sondra, I would have asked her about a billion questions, like how this was a normal thing to have to deal with and who on earth these creatures belonged to.
“Open your arms, like wings. It will help herd them away from the homes,” Sondra yelled back at me.
I did as she said as I gasped for air. Sweat ran down my face and neck as I continued to somewhat keep pace with eighteen-year-old Sondra. I prayed no one with a camera would be watching or there to capture my red, blotchy face or sweaty hair look. That with my khaki pants and neon green t-shirt—heaven have mercy.
Finally, we neared Ryan’s condo. He didn’t seem to have any livestock roaming around his space, so I veered toward the back, not wanting to waste time with knocking. He was usually in the back or at least had the back sliding door open while he worked. I didn’t think anything of the gunmetal gray SUV parked next to Ryan’s black one. He’d mentioned he had to work today, making calls and plans to get started with pre-production; if anything it was someone from Hit
Flix or something.
I had always been bad with assumptions, and this time mine blew up in my face.
As I rounded the back patio area of Ryan’s condo, there on the lounger I had just been sitting in a few nights prior was a gorgeous woman. She looked somewhat familiar, with her flaxen hair and bronze skin, her skintight dress and sky-high heels. Everything about her was extraordinarily more. I skidded to a stop, heaving in air just as the woman leaned into the space next to her and kissed the man I loved.
29
My heart felt like it was splintering into a thousand pieces. I couldn’t look away, couldn’t seem to move from the spot where it felt like lightning had struck, filling me with so much electric rage I thought I might explode. I waited for what felt like a billion seconds for Ryan to push her away, but he just sat there. He didn’t kiss her back or engage with the kiss in any way …but he didn’t move to end it either.
My chest constricted as I saw movement in front of them. There on the ground, a few feet away, was a photographer.
The hell?
The man stood, checking his camera and saying something to the couple about the shot. They broke apart then the beautiful woman grabbed her cell and started scrolling through it like she couldn’t be bothered. Ryan stood, grabbed his neck, and tipped his head to the sky while he walked around the patio. He looked trapped.
For some reason, my feet carried me over, my previous thoughts of fleeing and never speaking to him again fluttering near my chest in an angry flight of nerves. I wanted to punch him, drag the woman out of the patio area by her hair, and scream, but old habits had me swallowing my nerves.
The second I was within fifteen feet of Ryan’s house, a man started moving toward me. He was nearly six foot five with roped and corded muscles; it looked as though Ryan had finally set up security—that or it was for the woman I now assumed was an actress.
“Ma’am, you can’t be—”
“Bexley?” Ryan yelled from behind the giant.
His tall shoulders maneuvered around the guard until he was in front of me. He didn’t waste any time with questions or explaining himself. He pulled me in close for a hug, so intense and so tight I thought he might break me. A few seconds later he was releasing me and leaning in for a kiss, but I stopped him.
“I’m not exactly into sloppy seconds…at least not before you brush your teeth.” I was joking…mostly, but the twinge of hurt sliced through me like a blade just the same.
“Bex,” Ryan said on an exhale while the woman in the background laughed.
“She’s adorable, Ryan,” she cooed, rising to her feet. Taking long strides, she headed toward us, until she was right in front of us, holding out her hand. “Shelly Cambria, nice to meet you. You must be Ryan’s girlfriend.”
I didn’t shake her hand; I merely looked down at it as Ryan gripped my hip in a tight squeeze.
“So, you knew he had a girlfriend when you kissed him then?” I narrowed my gaze on her too-perfect bowlike lips and her big blue eyes. I refused to be ashamed of how I looked compared to this gazelle…but it wasn’t easy. She was the definition of perfect.
“This is just press, sweetie. The world needs to think we’re dating for a bit, that’s all. Once the premiere is done, we will have a nasty breakup…just like our last one. Isn’t that right, Ryan?” She blew an invisible kiss toward him then eyed me again. “I just hope he doesn’t catch any feelings this time.”
It would have hurt less if she slapped me.
I couldn’t breathe.
He’d been with her before? And now…now he was kissing her casually for a movie? They were dating now, or pretend dating…the press would see and know, and it would look like he’d dumped me, my kids would be dragged through the mud, I would be…
This was going to humiliate me.
I started to back away from Ryan as the pressure on my hip increased.
“Bex, don’t do this. Let me explain it so it makes sense.” He pleaded with me, but I couldn’t.
Tiny dots of black were dancing in my vision as I realized too late that I had literally been holding my breath since Shelly spoke. Opening my mouth, I wheezed.
“Baby, come here…come get some water. Have you been running?” Ryan whispered, pressing kisses to my hair.
He was still holding me, but I couldn’t be near him. I needed space, needed time to process what was happening. I pushed against him one last time before everything went dark.
“She was dehydrated and was likely in the sun for far longer than she should have been. There’s no way to tell, but the added stress likely just sent her over the edge.” Someone above me was talking in a soothing tone.
I cracked my eyelids and blanched at the pain in my skull. It felt like someone had hit me there with a hammer.
“It was because of Mr. Eberhard’s cattle that got out.” Sondra’s gentle voice cut into the sudden silence of the room. I hadn’t realized she had come with me to what was apparently the hospital, and she also sounded as though she’d been crying. “He’s this lonely millionaire with property that’s too big to keep up with. He refuses to sell, but he’s too old to maintain the deteriorating fences, which is why the cows are always getting out. I’m terrified of cows, but because I’m a manager now, Judy said I had to run after them.” Sondra started sniffing…I still wondered about her own sun exposure and whether or not she should be hooked up to an IV or something.
“She’ll be fine, but I would recommend you watch her carefully over the next twenty-four hours.” The man speaking was tall with white hair and gold-rimmed glasses. If I’d had the energy, I’d have let out an audible sigh of frustration. I didn’t have the insurance to pay for a random emergency room visit; I’d been hoping I was still at Ryan’s condo, propped up on a lounger where someone had slapped my cheek a few times to get me to come to.
“Hey, she’s awake,” I heard Cole say, getting closer.
Bella was next, but instead of stopping near me, she climbed into my bed.
I let out a sigh as I registered that I was in a hospital bed, complete with a gown and everything. How the hell had they done all that without me waking up?
“Why am I in the hospital?” I whispered. My throat felt like the Sahara Desert.
“You hit your head pretty hard.” Ryan’s soft explanation washed over me, as did the sensation of his fingers in my hair. “You were walking and tripped forward. I couldn’t catch you in time, and you landed on a rock.”
Right. The kiss…Shelly…the fake relationship.
My stomach soured as I flinched at Ryan’s touch.
“You okay, Mommy?” Bella asked, laying her head on my heart.
I ran my hand along her back. “Yes, baby, I’m okay.”
We checked out thirty minutes later, shortly after Shay rushed to my side, demanding to be filled in. Of course, Ryan didn’t mention the reason I had passed out. The coward.
I was thankful he didn’t try to drive us back to his condo. Then again, maybe that just meant he had company who was staying over. How far was he required to take this fake relationship? Did they have to get caught having sex, or getting engaged?
Once my front door clicked shut and Ryan had settled me in my bed, I informed him he could go home.
“I appreciate your help, but you can leave.”
“No,” he replied coolly.
“I don’t exactly want you here right now.” I closed my eyes tight against the spinning in my head. Never again would I mop those stupid chairs or run after stray cattle before taking my break.
“This doesn’t have anything to do with what you want. I’m staying until you’re better. I’m making the kids dinner, I’m here,” he softly reassured me.
It was on the tip of my tongue to tell him I could call Logan, or Shay…anyone but him.
“We need to talk about what happened.” Ryan helped stuff a few pillows behind my back to help me sit up. I hated feeling so weak around him when all my instincts were screaming at me to be strong.
“You cheated,” I stated plainly.
It was simple for me. He had cheated, and that was the end.
A heavy sigh left his chest. I still refused to open my eyes, too afraid of tears slipping free. I may have been weak with this heat stroke situation, but it had nothing on how weak I was for him.
“I didn’t cheat. I’m an actor and I was in breach of contract if I didn’t agree to that publicity stunt. I love you, Bexley. You, and only you.”
“And your job,” I added harshly, hating that it slipped free, but what he’d done hurt so much. Even if what he said was true—and my gut said it was—the fact that he hadn’t told me or warned me meant he wanted to protect his career more than he wanted to protect me. It only proved that his job came first. I couldn’t be with someone who put their job before their family. I hated the sickening realization that was flaring to life in my head, ever so slowly making its way down to my heart. I’d made this difficult decision before; I could do it again.
Even if it destroys me.
“I understand.” I opened my eyes, pushing against the spinning sensation, and gave him a weak smile.
“You understand?” Ryan’s wheat-colored hair was tousled, his eyes tired and rimmed in red.
I tried to sit up so I could be a bit more clear-headed. “Yes, I do.”
We weren’t his family, so why on earth would he sacrifice his job for us? It didn’t make any sense, and frankly I was being an idiot getting offended that he wouldn’t even consider putting our feelings first. He had no care in the world what that article would do to my reputation, or what it would be like for me to be considered the other woman once the world thought he was dating his costar. He didn’t care what it would do to my kids.
Because we weren’t his to worry about.
“I’m sorry I freaked out.” I swallowed the thick lump in my throat, turning my head toward him.