by Wendy Burke
***
The Titans arrived in Chicago too late for Andy to rent a car and spend ninety minutes zipping north to suburban Milwaukee, not with a day game looming. But he knew the three of them could join him at tomorrow’s game, then they’d all go to the hotel together. He’d have two nights and portions of three days with them, which would, hopefully, be enough time to calm his wife and make amends.
Popping his head above the dugout roof, he scanned the seats searching for his girls. He found nothing, other than the usual hanger-on autograph seekers and stragglers waiting to wander the queue up and out of the stadium. It’s only a two-hour drive, Char. You should’ve been here by now
With a sigh, he headed down the tunnel and into the clubhouse. Grabbing his phone from his locker shelf, a text message explained, Parking lot on 94, not even to Racine. Then, just hitting the state line. Finally, Parking lot on Ohio Street. Should be there soon.
***
Charly settled the girls at a table in their room overlooking the Chicago River. Happy to be out of the car, they easily settled in to puzzles and snacks of strawberries and dry Cheerios. “I’m going to wash my face and be right out, okay?”
In stereo, they answered, “Okay, Mommy.”
With a resigned sigh, she splashed water over her face. Blindly she hunted for a towel and pressed it to her skin. Pulling it from her face, she frowned at the reflection in the mirror. Her face revealed every emotion she felt: sadness, uncertainty, pain, and fear for her future.
“Daddy!”
Hearing elated shrieks from the other room, she swallowed hard and dried her tears. Sucking in her emotions, she prepared to face her husband.
She lingered in the bathroom’s doorway, listening and watching from afar. Why can’t he love me the same way he loves them?
After what seemed like an eternity of hugs, kisses, and tickles, her husband, in his own wonderful way, resettled their girls, handing them crayons and more puzzles.
He faced Charly.
Do not look at me like that. His grin perpetually weakened her knees. Butterflies laughed and danced in her tummy. But, I’m so damn mad at you! And, don’t take your time wandering over here.
“Baby.”
She relented, allowing him to embrace her. Dammit, and you have to smell good and feel even better! Toughen up! You’re angry, remember? She turned her face, forcing his kiss onto her cheek.
***
After dinner in the room and getting his fill of his children, he read them one last story, tucking in the two exhausted sisters. Andy leaned over for one last good night kiss. Nothing calmed and centered him more than his girls, and not just the two little ones. Although elated to see his twins, he was even more excited and pleased to see his wife, regardless of the doghouse he’d probably reside in for some time.
His wife was under the covers in the other bedroom of the suite, on her back, her arm crossed over her eyes.
Andy gently climbed in beside her, not wanting to startle her. He hoped he’d not be rejected—at least not too severely. He slipped one arm under her neck and draped his other over her midsection, resting his head against hers. Her alluring scent rushed blood to his groin. Listening to her breathing, he wanted nothing more to roll on to her, rub himself against her, and find a way inside her.
Dammit! He didn’t let her turn too far out of his hold. “Charly.”
“What?”
Even though their children were fast asleep in the other room, still he kept his voice low, hoping his gentle tone would calm her irritation. “Don’t shut me out.”
Her voice was even and quiet. “I’m doing no such thing, Andy. I’m here, the girls are here. I wouldn’t call that shutting you out.”
“I thought we put this behind us.”
“You did, huh?”
“Talk to me.”
He could feel her holding her breath, counting to ten, preparing to temper her words.
“And just what would you like to talk about? How you’ve humiliated the woman you’re married to? You’re not home, you have no idea what people—what the media—in Milwaukee are saying about you, and most importantly about us.”
“Honey—”
“Shut up.” Despite the rebuke, her tone remained civil. “Isn’t that what you said to me over the phone a last week when I was ‘overreacting?’ It’s your turn to ‘shut up and listen.’ You show up in a high-scale magazine with nearly nude models draped all over you. It’s everywhere. And I’m supposed to ignore it, slap on a smile, and not be offended, hurt, or concerned? You tell me how, Andrew Knox, you tell me how and I’ll do it.”
Shit…I totally fucked up this time.
“I can’t go to the store without this in my face, magazines, whispering, the clerks in the checkout line. They all want to know if our marriage is over. ‘Those poor little girls.’ That’s the latest thing I’m hearing.”
“Why do you listen to it?”
“I’m not actively listening to it, It comes to me! Do you realize we’re a game show on some local radio station? I know you’re in the public eye, but you didn’t have to drag the rest of us in, too.”
She sighed, releasing a load of pent up frustration. Quietly she mentioned, “I love you, Andy”
“I love—”
“Please,” she interrupted. “I love you, but, I don’t like you very much right now.”
Resting his head against the back of hers, he sighed, feeling guilty and embarrassed. His voice had never been so small. “I’m sorry, Charly. I’m sorry.”
“I’ve heard those words before. This can’t be like the last time, Andy. We have too much at stake this time around, including two children. Please don’t humiliate me like that. I know you love your profession, and you’re lucky to have the talent to do something so many other men only fantasize about. I want you to have fun, to do and experience what is only a dream for other people. But our integrity needs to be foremost. While all the negative attention is painful, I actually don’t care what other people think, but I have to know you care what I think.”
His heart ached when she slipped from his hold.
“And, I really wanted to have sex tonight, since it’s just about the right time of the month for us to get pregnant….” She left the thought floating, dissipating into the tense ether.
A bed creaked in the other bedroom.
What the fuck is wrong with me? He swiped at his eyes, wondering how he had driven his wife so far away from him.
***
The next evening, after a horrendous game, she nodded and smiled as she and Andy made their way through the lobby of the team’s hotel. Fans wanting autographs were out of luck. His arms were full, weighed down by two sleeping four-year-olds. A day at the ball park, watching her husband play, together as a couple with their children, had slowly softened her anger. If you only knew how much watching you be a dad turns me on!
Back in the hotel room, they chuckled quietly, removing their children’s layers of jackets and sweaters, and shoes. The twins never woke as their parents tended to them. Charly watched Andy give them each a lingering kiss and long look before he sighed, leaving them to their sleep.
Andy slipped into their bed, spooning up to Charly. She sighed, for the first time in a few weeks completely content, again feeling safe and loved. He “mmmed,” settling in to her, and a little electrical spark warmed her low in her belly.
“Thank you for an incredible day, hon.”
She turned her head over her shoulder to peer at him in the darkness. “I didn’t do anything.”
He kissed her gently on the mouth. “You’re here, the girls are here. That always makes for a good day.”
“Even if your team sucks?”
“Yeah, we do.”
“You’re doing your part, but I don’t know about the rest of the squad. Great trade, huh?”
“Can’t say it was the best move I’ve ever made, but you know….”
“You didn’t have any control over it—either
accept it or quit playing. I know. Just can’t see you full-time in bib overalls in a milking parlor yet.” She felt his amused smile against her cheek. “I’m sorry I overreacted. I’m sorry for how hard this has been on us.”
“No, baby, you had every right to be pissed off. It won’t happen again, I promise.”
“Andy?”
“Yeah, hon?”
“I love you.”
He cocked his head at her. “You’re sure about that?” he teased.
She turned in his hold, watching as he closed his eyes and groaned when she skimmed her hands under his tank top caressing his chest. Baring his skin, she rubbed her face against his well-cut pectoral muscles. “Oh, I’m pretty sure about that.” She sighed, hugging him well.
“Were you serious about what you said last night, Char? Do you want another baby? I know, eventually, Chloe will go deer hunting with me, but Bree, she’ll stick her nose in the air at the thought of a camo dress.”
She laughed aloud at his silly, but exact, description of their children. They both quieted, and she looked up at him. Even in the dark his beautiful chocolate-brown eyes twinkled in mischief. “Do you?” she asked.
“Course I do. There’s more than enough estrogen in our house, and once they get into their teens, I’ll have absolutely no backup! Didn’t we talk about three or four?”
“That was before we had two at once.”
“Well, numbers shift. We can up that to four or five, if you want.”
She tried to stifle the thought, but it fell from her mouth anyway, “Well, we’ve sort of already had three.” She held back the tears when he collected her in his arms. If life had gone according to plan, they’d already have been parents of three.
“I know.” He encouraged her to her back. “You are damn cute pregnant.” His warm hand clutched her tummy as he continued. “You get all pooched out and tight right here.”
“That’s cute to you?” she chided.
He moved a wayward sprig of hair from her forehead. “You’re cute to me. You get curvy in all the right spots.” He raised an eyebrow at her. “You know what that does to me!”
When he draped a long leg over hers, a growing stiffness prodded at her. Damn, Andy, your hard dick always gets me wet! “We better get busy then, huh?”
***
“Will you be home soon, Daddy?” Bree asked. She and her sister stood on the rail next to the dugout. The two girls were steadied by their mother behind them, as they were hugged by their father on the other side.
“Probably sooner than you think, babies.” He kept his voice low, not wanting anyone around to hear him and think he was hoping his new team would be eliminated before post season play.
Glancing at the scoreboard, Charly shook her head. “I’m sure you’re right on that account, hon.” She smiled at her family. Her husband covered his daughters’ faces with silly kisses, squeezing them tightly. She knew he took fatherhood seriously, making sure his children knew he loved them regardless of being physically away from them more than half the year.
“Knox!” Their surname came bellowing from dugout.
“Give me one more kiss, Chloe. You, too, Bree.”
Holding her breath, she didn’t want to get emotional in public, in love with the fact he was so in love with them.
When the hugs and kisses ended, he returned his girls to solid ground in the stands. “Wait there for Mommy, okay?” He took his wife’s hand, drawing her to him.
Charly breathed him in—a scent of sweat, dust, and physical work, and a hint of some muscle balm his trainers used during the season.
Sealed in his embrace, his body still warm from the early May sun and physical work, her body tingled and her mind flooded with thoughts of their near secretive love making the night before. She bit her lip, wondering how Andy had performed so well on the field, considering their coupling had lasted until near daybreak.
His lips pressed to her ear, he sang quietly, “I know what you’re thinking.”
“You do?” She pressed her knees together, wanting to ward off any beginning of arousal, but the image of her husband smothering her bare body with his, her arms pinned over her head as his strength ground into her had her holding back a pant.
“Did last night do the trick? If not, with what’s going on in my cup right now, I’ll need to drag you into the dugout to get some relief!”
His tongue met her ear and she slumped into his hold.
“I love you.”
She held in a sniffle. When he released her to look into her eyes, he smeared a tear across her cheek with a strong thumb. She tossed herself back into his hold, clinging to him tightly. “I love you, Andy, and I miss you already.”
“I’ll see you soon.” He kissed her cheek, then her mouth. “Look at the schedule, see what looks doable, with or without the girls, okay?”
“All right.”
He cocked his chin toward the stands. “This gentleman will take you to the car.” With a wet smooch to her forehead he mentioned, “I gotta get going, Char.”
She nodded again and let him go. “Daddy’s going, girls.”
“Bye, Daddy! See you on TV!”
He ruffled their hair once more and then put a hand to Charly’s cheek. “Love you, babe.”
Her eyes didn’t leave his until he disappeared under the dugout overhang.
Chapter Five
Life returned to a new rhythm. They caught up in person any time the family could. For Charly that meant a few hours on an airplane for barely a full weekend with her husband every now and then. The twins especially loved a long weekend of baseball-related fun during July’s All Star week. She loved the fact that Andy had made the prestigious squad again this season, but those Titan pinstripes still irritated the hell out of her.
The four sat together in the hotel dining room, just like any other family on a summertime vacation. Breakfast was certainly the one thing Andy truly missed with his family.
“Mommy, can Daddy see the pictures now?” Bree asked.
“It looks like you’re finished with your eggs, so I suppose that will be all right. Wipe your hands first.” The four year old did as her mother requested before taking her mother’s phone.
“This is when we went to the zoo, Daddy.”
Andy smiled, listening to his daughter’s colorful description of animals large and small.
“What’s this one?”
“I don’t know. Mommy, what’s this?” Bree held the phone up to her mother. Chloe took a look at the photo as well.
“It’s a plus sign,” Chloe mentioned. “We’re doing adding.”
“Maybe he needs to see it a little closer.”
He took the phone from his daughter. A millisecond later, he understood. “Are you sure?” he choked out. When he looked at Charly, he did so through eyes blurred with tears.
She smiled at him, taking his hand. “Guess that weekend in Chicago did the trick!”
“Are you okay, Daddy?”
He looked at his girls, their little faces full of concern. He could only nod and kiss their foreheads. Any spoken word would cause his voice to break. After he’d calmed his girls, he turned back to his wife. “Baby.” Leaving his seat, he swept her into his arms, knowing as he hugged her, he also embraced the little being growing inside her. “Thank you, honey, thank you.”
“Well, you had something to do with it!”
Cradling her face in his hands, he asked, “How long?”
“Well.” He watched as she did math in her head. “Eight, nine weeks. So let’s just keep it ‘in the family’ for now, okay?”
“Okay.” Bringing her face to his, he kissed her, long, deeply and without shame, regardless of their public situation.
“Uh, Andy. We’re getting looks.”
He chuckled into her neck.
“If I see a cell phone or a flash, I’m not going to be happy,” she joked. Her teasing thought realized with a nearby blink of light.
“Let’s see it, Chloe,”
Bree demanded.
“Wait, Bree, you have to push this first,” Chloe answered. The two girls hovered over their mother’s phone.
He put his forehead to Charly’s. “Yeah, we need a few more people in the house who are more technologically advanced than we are!”
***
Summer heat, humidity, and pregnancy never made for a good combination, but in Charly’s case, the three worked overtime against her. Morning sickness had settled in a week ago. But this seemed like much more than routine pregnancy complaints.
She didn’t want to admit it, but she knew the exact pain which rousted her from sleep.
“No, no, no, not again.” She pressed hard on her lower tummy. Please, let it stop. But relief didn’t come.
“Mommy?” Sitting up in bed with their mother, the girls peered at her with concern.
A small hand touched her forehead, stroking hair from her face. Chloe leaned forward, her brows narrowed, obviously worried. “You’re so hot, Momma.” They were wise beyond their almost-five years. “Are you okay?”
Through the pain, she watched Bree, a seemingly too large phone in her small hands.
“Gramma? Can you come over?”
Between the pain and her abdominal muscles preparing to bring up the contents of her empty stomach, passing out would have been a blessing. Her hand dropped near her children. “Give me the phone, Bree.”
“Here’s Gramma.”
“Mom, can you come get me? It’s happening again.”
***
Andy slid down into the tub, steamy water bubbling near his ears. Closing his eyes, he replayed tonight’s game in his head—despite having the season of his life, his performance all for naught. Most of the team sucked. Huntington and I are doing all the work! I never thought being a Titan would be so embarrassing!
A ping on the deck of the tub distracted him from his wallowing. He shook water from his hands and grabbed his phone. With a snicker, he shook his head as a Holstein cow’s face filled the screen, an inside joke with his brother, Aaron. He tapped the screen and the text appeared.