Guilt Trip

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by Pat Simmons


  When she finished devouring her meal with a tall glass of milk, Talise showered. Afterward, she slipped into her pajamas and grabbed her Bible, remembering one of the passages Gabrielle had fired off to Kendall.

  After being physically satisfied, now she was hungry for the Word. Talise couldn’t believe she had read five chapters before closing her Bible. Some of the passages she had read off and on before but had never got the understanding she had now. Truly amazed at the transformation that had taken place in her life, she whispered, “Thank You, Jesus.”

  Lois and Myra strolled through the door as Talise left her bedroom to get a fruit snack from the kitchen.

  “Hey, church girl,” Lois teased.

  “It’s Sister Talise to you.” She teasingly scrunched up her nose and then nodded at Myra.

  “I smell food.” Myra dumped her purse and blazer on a nearby chair and rubbed her empty stomach.

  Talise exchanged glances with Lois, who shook her head not to say anything. “I made enough dinner for all of us. I’m getting a snack.”

  “Cool. I’ll have some of everything,” Myra said.

  Talise sliced her apples and washed grapes. She topped it off with a dab of cream cheese dip. When she headed back to her room, Lois trailed behind her.

  Checking over her shoulder to make sure Myra was occupied with piling food on her plate, Lois whispered, “How was I supposed to know she was an undercover ‘junkie’? At work, she’s as neat as a manicured lawn. Five and a half months to go. Just count them down.”

  “I’m counting down seventeen weeks before my baby arrives, then I’ll be back on my feet soon after that.”

  “Or married, if this Minister Ricky has his way. After you told me what he said …” Lois wiggled a brow.

  “He does have a lot going for him, with good looks, the right attitude, and a good rep.”

  “That’s what I’m talking about.” They exchanged high fives.

  Suddenly Myra walked up behind them with her hand up in the air. “Me too,” she chimed in.

  Talise high fived her too. When Lois steered Myra in the direction of the kitchen, Talise closed her door. Grabbing her phone, she settled on top of her comforter and called Sandra.

  “Talise, I was going to call you. How’s the first day of being a new saint in Christ going?”

  “Amazing.” She chuckled and then remembered Gabrielle’s gift. Getting up to retrieve it, Talise reached into the bag and pulled out a small box. In it, she discovered a snow globe with a pair of praying hands inside. Smiling, she carefully removed it, shook it, and held it up to the light.

  “So how was dinner?” Sandra asked.

  “I didn’t know if you were going to bring it up or tiptoe around it,” Talise said honestly. “I’ve been wondering how you felt about Minister Thomas asking me out.”

  Sandra sighed and didn’t respond right away. “The flesh was upset, but my spirit overrode it. Your life is in God’s hands. He wants the best for you and He knows what that means. Whatever it is, I want that for you too. Just promise me one thing.”

  Talise held her breath. This could be the moment their friendship ended if she switched personalities on her. “What is it?”

  “If Richard turns out to be the man whom God has for you—and I know he is a good man—please don’t keep my grandchild from me.”

  Talise’s eyes misted. This woman was truly an example of Christ. She was showing no bias or favoritism on behalf of her son. Like God, Sandra showed no respect of persons. Talise had read that in Romans 2:11. Her opinion of Sandra just moved up a notch.

  At that moment, the conversation made Talise question her feelings toward Myra. The woman may not be as tidy as she and Lois, but Myra was helping Talise out. She would definitely have to try harder.

  “My child will know the wonderful woman she or he has for a grandmother,” she told Sandra with a sober tone.

  Once the ice was broken, they talked about the previous day’s preaching and the baby.

  “Hey, guess who’s coming to town next weekend?”

  Lord, don’t play. Ace is out of the picture, right? “Who?”

  “Eva and the girls. You know Eva is a shopaholic after my own heart. She talked Kidd into needing a shopping spree. They also want you to do their hair, if you feel up to it.”

  “I’ll check my client load.” She had so much fun with the Jamieson wives. “Is Grandma BB coming too?” Talise still didn’t know what to make of that complex woman.

  “She might be. Eva didn’t know if that’s the weekend she’s renting herself out as a grandma.”

  “What?” Talise laughed, startling her baby. She rubbed her stomach.

  “Yeah, Eva says she has a franchise where clients contact her for babysitting services from women over sixty. Her marketing strategy is that seniors have more patience than younger women.”

  “Hmm. I could see that.”

  “She orders a background check, drug test, and credit history on every candidate. If they pass all of that, the women are also required to have gray hair, whether it’s theirs or not. To complete the criteria, every woman has to own at least one pair of Stacy Adams shoes. Otherwise, they can’t work for her,” Sandra told Talise.

  “That woman is a character.”

  “Yeah, and I want to have her energy and fun when I’m her age.”

  After getting off the subject of Grandma BB, they returned to the matter of the hair appointments. “Okay, I’ll try and fit them in around my regular clients, but I won’t be held responsible if I give somebody blonde hair.”

  They laughed. Since Sandra was now a regular, high-paying customer, Talise knew what hair products to use on her. For the others, she would rely on the products she already has on hand. It’d take time to really assess their hair. That would have to come later.

  “It will be nice to see them again, especially since it sounds like I’m going to miss out on the shopping spree.”

  “Humph. You’re probably glad about that! What if I come next Friday? That would be less people on Saturday.”

  “That may work.” When Talise yawned, Sandra hurried her off the phone so Talise could get some rest.

  The next day at work, Talise thanked Gabrielle for her gift when she came in early. “I really appreciate the praying hands. It’s a lovely gift.”

  They hugged and Gabrielle told her, “Remember, if you keep your hands together, you’ll have strength to make it through anything. Now you are free to move around the cabin.”

  “I’ll remember that. By the way, if you have time, call me when you get a chance. I want to tell you something.”

  “Will do.” Gabrielle said and waved goodbye.

  Since Talise had driven to work, she decided to walk to the neighborhood park later that evening for her exercise. She was sitting on the bench when Gabrielle called. Talise filled her in on the dinner with the minister. She told her about his daily phone calls with a Scripture for her to meditate on, accompanied by his commentary.

  “I’m honored that you’ve allowed me to be in your circle of friends. Now allow me to give you my opinion, not advice.”

  Talise listened.

  “You loved Ace, and you haven’t had closure. You still need that. You told me that he called you once—”

  “And it wasn’t a good conversation. Every word became colder.”

  “Oh, we need to pray for him, Talise.”

  “I know. I’m asking God to help me with that, but when I think of Ace, it’s synonymous with hurt, betrayal, and desertion.”

  She told Gabrielle how Sandra had treated her warmly when she knew Talise had dinner with another man.

  As she listened to Talise’s testimony, Gabrielle whispered, “Thank You, Jesus.”

  When she finished talking, Gabrielle brought the subject of Ace back into the discussion. “This minister sounds like a wonderful man who is willing to step in where Ace stepped out. In a perfect world, you and Ace would patch things up and move forward with a happy en
ding. Unfortunately, that doesn’t seem like it’s going to happen.”

  “You sound as if you are about to cry over a man you’ve never met.”

  “I’m a romantic. I believe God can make fairy tales come true. I was hoping Ace would come to his senses.”

  Talise stood and began to walk back to her apartment as the sun was setting. Before they disconnected, Gabrielle had one last thing to say. “It’s easier to replace people when they’re out of sight, out of mind, and seemingly out of a person’s heart.”

  In the back of her mind, Talise had an uneasy feeling about her friend’s words.

  Chapter Forty-One

  The Jamieson family game night a few weeks ago had done Ace in. It had nothing to do with the oddest questions known to man that were asked, but the embedded feeling of connection among everyone else besides him and Kidd. The pride in the elder Parke’s eyes and voice when one of his family members gave the right answers was priceless.

  As much as he loved his mother and Kidd, there was never that type of bonding with any of his cousins on his mother’s side. Amazingly, Kidd fit right in with the Jamieson crowd, as if he belonged all along.

  What would it take for me to fit in? Ace wondered.

  When Eva had slipped—or maybe it was on purpose—and mentioned Talise’s name, he left as promised. Not because he wasn’t having a good time, surprisingly. It was merely about saving face. He had to prove that once he made up his mind about something or someone, he didn’t change it.

  Then two days later, it was a shocker to all, including Ace, when he accepted Kidd’s invitation to church. It was the first time since he had been in St. Louis that he said yes.

  What was it that prompted him now? Maybe it was the feeling of living in isolation that he had been experiencing. Although it would be hard for Ace to admit out loud, his new apartment felt lonely, like something, or somebody, was missing. Perhaps that was increasing his desire to spend more time with his family.

  Sunday morning, he met Eva and Kidd at Salvation Temple. Ace chuckled as he parked his car and strolled his way to the front entrance. He was sure Kidd would be waiting for him there.

  What exactly did the church name imply? Was it an emergency room where people could go when they were sick and leave bandaged up? Ace had no expectations. Walking inside the vestibule, he nodded to a few who greeted him with “Praise the Lord.”

  Kidd stepped up to him and shook his hand before giving him a bear hug. He introduced Ace to a few people, bypassing the ladies, and then headed to their seats to join Eva.

  Until now, his sister-in-law hadn’t given Ace a smile so bright since he first moved to St. Louis. Back then, she wasn’t even aware of his motive for relocating. Since she found out, her smiles had been at a premium.

  Making himself comfortable, Ace sat through the praise team, the choir, and the announcements. The church wasn’t much different than his mother’s in Boston. He knew how to go through the motions without letting a sermon change his mind about doing what he planned to do before he walked in.

  It wasn’t long before Salvation Temple’s pastor, Elder Taylor, took front and center. Without much of preliminary, he opened his Bible and began reading from Acts, chapter nine.

  Focusing on verse five from the King James Version, he read, “And he said, Who art thou, Lord? And the Lord said, I am Jesus whom thou persecutest: it is hard for thee to kick against the pricks.”’

  Pausing for a slight moment, Elder Taylor began, “My subject today is ‘thinking you’ve got it all right, and in the end, finding out you had it all wrong.’”

  “Amen,” “Well,” and “Preach, Pastor” comments circulated around the auditorium.

  “Paul was an honorable man when he was on the road to Damascus. He was a Jew with knowledge and zeal. He didn’t take anything off of nobody. Yet God wasn’t pleased with what he was doing because it wasn’t God’s way. Here is the question you need to ask yourself: Are you living your life the way God wants for you?”

  Pausing again, he went further, “You see, God doesn’t have to persecute you, your ignorance will cause you to persecute yourself …”

  For the next hour, Ace listened to the message. Finally, although the altar call was stirring, Ace didn’t feel a need to make a change in his life. Once the benediction was given, he turned to say goodbye to Kidd and Eva.

  “Did you enjoy the service?” Eva asked him.

  “I did. When I get a chance, I might visit again.” Ace meant it and headed to his car. One thing that stuck with him was their pastor’s opening statement, “thinking you’ve got it all right, and in the end, finding out you had it all wrong.” But he really didn’t want to consider the consequences of him making bad decisions.

  On Monday, Ace was in his office downtown. Things didn’t get better for him. He couldn’t concentrate because his mind was elsewhere. Instead of Sunday’s sermon inspiring him, it bugged him and made him grouchy.

  When it came to Talise, who he once felt made him complete, he had miscalculated her intentions. She could definitely be chalked up as a misstep in his life. That thought made him both sad and mad at the same time.

  Highly agitated, he snapped at his assistant for opening his office door without knocking. She never knocked before, and it had never been a big deal. Later on that day, Ace gave a store clerk a hard time when she overcharged him fifty cents for a case of beer.

  When Kidd called one evening, Ace roared at his brother. Kidd growled back. “Is there anything you want me to get for you while we’re there?”

  Ace snarled over the phone. “Thanks for rubbing it in that you’re taking Eva on a Boston shopping spree.”

  “I can’t help it.” Kidd snickered. “Who would have thought when Ma was teaching you how to walk you would become a love stalker on a ‘no-fly list’? How many more weeks do you have before you can buy a plane ticket?”

  “So you’ve got jokes, huh?” Clicking off his new high-def TV that he wasn’t watching anyway, Ace padded across the carpet of his sparingly furnished living room and went into the kitchen to put his frozen dinner in the oven.

  His apartment building was fairly new. Ace could still smell the freshly painted walls and the carpet was brand-new. Eva had offered to decorate, but Kidd declined for him.

  “Get your own wife,” Kidd had said without a smile or blink.

  Ace didn’t blame him. He was thankful Kidd let Eva still cook for him. Walking over to the sliding door, he glanced out. A plane coming in for a landing caught his attention and mocked him.

  How ironic is that? He couldn’t board a plane for a couple more months. Yet the huge flying pieces of metal taunted him several times a day. Their engines seemed to roar louder than usual whenever another one flew over his head. Ace couldn’t wait until he was free to clear the security checkpoint again. Planning to be on his best behavior, if he saw anybody he thought he knew, he wouldn’t even offer them a handshake.

  “I’m sure while you guys are in Boston, Eva will see Tay. Will you tell me how she looks?”

  “You mean, if she looks pregnant?” Kidd huffed. “Well, I’m going to tell you right now, if I can’t tell at a glance from yards away, I’m not about to be staring. Not when I have a beautiful wife to gaze at day and night. You’re on your own.”

  The joke was on Ace. What he meant was did she look okay health-wise? Or did she seem happy or not? Or was she as miserable as he was because she wasn’t in his life? At this point, he was over her, concerning the pregnancy Ace wasn’t about to explain himself.

  Kidd softened his tone. “I can’t help you on this. I’ve been your problem-solver all your life. I don’t know the details with Talise, but be a man. Don’t handle it like the old Ace Jamieson I know would. Pray and God will show you the best way to deal with it.”

  Ace grunted. “Like mumbling a few words will really change things.”

  “It doesn’t take an hour to talk to Jesus. When your heart is heavy with concerns, God hears you. How do yo
u think He drew me to Him when my mouth said one thing, but God zoomed in on my heart?”

  Ace didn’t know if he would ever get used to the way his brother talked about the Lord. When Kidd repented years ago, Ace thought he’d lost his mind. Now, adding to his vexation, Kidd always made sense to him.

  Closing his eyes, Ace leaned his head back against the wall. “The last time we spoke, it didn’t end well. I hurt her when I walked away, but she crushed me with her scheming. We can’t get pass that. But I do care about her, so just let me know if she looks well, please.” He returned to his spot on the sofa.

  Kidd’s voice took on a serious tone. “Are you okay? This is the longest conversation we’ve had in months about Talise. What gives?”

  “You all are killing me softly with your double-talk. You don’t talk about Talise in my face. But let me turn to the side or turn my back and those Jamieson wives are in cahoots with her.”

  “Are you accusing my wife of something? If you are, it might be worth getting a speeding ticket to get to you.”

  “Bring it on, Kidd. Why not let me take out my frustration on your face.” They both knew how to street fight. “All I’m saying is Eva and the others are guilty by association.”

  “The only guilty party on this phone call is you. Handle your business, man. Go talk to her.”

  “I can’t fly, remember?”

  “I guess you’d better tie up your hiking boots, Ace, or buy a gas card. Pick your poison.”

  Drive? Kidd was nuts. No woman was worth a train, a bus, or a twenty-hour car ride.

  Chapter Forty-Two

  On Saturday morning, Talise wasn’t prepared to see three complete Jamieson packages stroll into Sasha’s Sassy Salon. Talk about showstoppers, hand blow-dryers seemed to quit on their own accord and all conversations ceased.

  She was almost guilty of burning Priscilla’s locks with the curling iron. The group was picture perfect. No wonder the Jamieson women were a happy bunch.

 

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