No she didn’t know ‘how it was’ but she wasn’t going to share that juicy bit of information with the half-naked model standing before her. “Right,” she answered coolly. “Noel?”
“Ah yes, he’s changing. I’m afraid in the excitement of my arrival we got a little carried away,” she said, grinning knowingly.
“Of course. If you’ll excuse me,” she said stepping around Ava and heading for her room.
“No problem Shellie,” she called after her. “It’s so nice to finally meet Noel’s roommate!”
Roommate? The evil, perky, beautiful, sexed up…bitch! Closing the door behind her, Shellie rested against it for a moment before her body began working on autopilot, pulling underwear and bras from drawers and tossing them in a bag and yanking clothes from her closet and balling them up to shove into another bag. She didn’t know where she was going but she knew she had to get out of this house, out of this town and now. She could conduct her business anywhere, helping local clients by phone and email. That’s what she would do, go someplace, anyplace and start over where no one would cast a pitiful glance at poor Shellie who could never catch a break.
There was one place she knew she could go and would always be welcome. A slow smile spread across her face as two tears escaped and she knew where she would go. At least for a little while, she promised. With her destination set Shellie grabbed the notepad from her nightstand, scribbling a quick note before grabbing her bags and laptop case and heading for the door.
“Leaving so soon?” Ava purred in her direction. Still wearing only her sexy lingerie.
“I have business,” she answered brusquely but kept making her way to the door. To freedom.
“A farmer to save?” Her laugh was dripping with condescension.
Shellie cut her a cold stare. “Something like that,” she muttered as she slid on her favorite green ballet flats. The same green of Noel’s eyes clouded with desire. After a long sigh she turned in the doorway to face Ava. “Congratulations by the way. On your engagement.”
A huge grin split Ava’s face, clapping with excitement. “Thanks so much! I’ll be sure to send you an invitation.”
The idea of Noel marrying this woman made her sick to her stomach and she hurried through the door and into fresh air. Once she was calm again, she looked back to her house and whispered solemnly, “Goodbye Noel.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Two weeks ago Shellie’s car pulled up to a quaint ranch house on the outskirts of Chicago. The quiet neighborhood was empty with no porch lights or signs of life from any of the big picture windows at the late hour, which was fine by her. Her embarrassment and heartache was bad enough without a neighborhood full of happy families taking pity on her tear-stained cheeks and red eyes. Mama Lim opened the door looking every bit the concerned mother she had always been to Shellie. Wrapping her arms around shaking shoulders, Mama Lim lead her inside and stuffed her full of ginger chicken and Lo Mein noodles.
And now Shellie spent her days coming up with new marketing techniques and decorating tips to make the restaurant look like the jewel it was to her. Thanks to the revamped image the lunch crowd had increased by twenty percent leaving Mama Lim beaming daily as she flitted from one table to the next making her customers smile and feel like they were visiting an old family friend. Watching Mama Lim dote on her customers brought a smile to her face, something she hadn’t done in so long she wasn’t sure she remembered how.
In exchange for her help Shellie was allowed to take over her old apartment above the restaurant. “You always welcome at Mama Lim’s, child.” She promised as she cradled Shellie’s face and stared warmly into her heartbroken eyes. She flashed an appreciative smile at the woman who had become her surrogate mother but she knew it didn’t quite reach her eyes. She knew because every morning she saw the sadness and heartache and disappointment in the honey eyes staring back at her. She missed Noel. It was written all over her face and that fact made her angry. Angry at him for being so sweet and kind and smart and funny and motivated and handsome as hell. She was angry with him for making her fall for him and driving her from her home. She was angrier with herself though, for falling for a man like Noel, so focused on his career and being too damned good looking to be true.
Truth be told she felt like the worst kind of fool remembering Rich’s words and reliving the shocking image of Ava’s lithe body filling out that sexy black lingerie. Worse was imagining those perfect long shapely legs wrapped around her Noel. No, Ava’s Noel, she reminded herself ruefully. Shaking away those unsettling thoughts and images that constantly plagued her any moment her mind wasn’t occupied with work, she noticed Mama Lim had taken up the spot across from her and was staring with concerned eyes over her laptop. Three miniature bamboo steamers appeared on the table open behind her laptop and smelling gloriously. “You need to eat Michelle or you won’t have no energy to make up with your young man,” she chuckled raising her eyebrows suggestively.
Her stomach stood at attention as the mixture of spices hit her nose and she shut her laptop and sat it on one of the empty seats nearby since the large round table had become her base of operations. “I will eat Mama Lim for me and because you make the best shu-mai ever. But I don’t have anyone to make up with or anything to make up for.” She dipped the steamed wrapper into a lime, Asian chili and tamari sauce and bit into it with more zeal than she’d had since the Council Meeting.
Mama Lim reached over and closed her small wrinkled hand over Shellie’s. “Oh honey I wouldn’t be so sure. Sounds like you two just had a misunderstanding like me and my Bill used to.” That wistful gaze hurt Shellie’s heart. Mama Lim had loved her husband and that look in her eyes showed her just how much.
Yeah a half-naked fiancé could mean so many things. “I doubt that Mama Lim. He’s engaged and I can’t be the other woman.” Again.
“Are you sure he’s engaged?” Mama Lim hated to Shellie so sad. She was the sweetest young woman Mama Lim had ever met and with her business growing, she wanted to return the favor.
“Even if he wasn’t engaged she was half naked in my living room and he was off somewhere getting dressed.” After having wild passionate sex with her. She couldn’t even get excited with her despair at an all time high and her confidence at an all time low.
“Either way dear, you need to talk to him. Tell him off, kick him out or slap his face. Do what you have to do to make up and move on, or just move on.”
“I’m trying Mama Lim, I really am. It’s just I thought…I guess I figured,” she sighed heavily unable to put her feelings into words.
Mama Lim pushed up from the table and wrapped her chubby little arms around Shellie’s shoulders. “You’re in love with him sweetheart. It’s okay to say it.”
I love him. Dammit I love him. The bastard!
##
Sitting in the darkened living room with nothing but the blue light of the television to illuminate the room, Noel finished off his second bottle of Jameson and wondered where Shellie could have gone. Weeks had passed since he saw her drive away with tears in her eyes, probably thinking the worst of him. Which is exactly what Ava wanted her to think, he slammed his fist into the sofa cushions. As soon as he realized what happened he kicked Ava out on her perfectly toned ass and told her to forget she ever knew him.
He called Alex hopeful that Shellie returned to her friend’s house to get away from him, but she claimed ignorance of her whereabouts then proceeded to yell at him and call him some names he didn’t want to think about. He was all of them, he knew, but it didn’t make him feel any better to admit that he’d fucked up royally and wouldn’t likely get a chance to fix it. He knew he could stay here in her home until she returned because she would have to return. Eventually. But that wouldn’t be fair to her, he realized even in his drunken state.
Noel drank more in the last few weeks than he had in 6 years of college and graduate school, but things had never been such a mess back then. These last few weeks since Shellie
left had been long, too long in fact, and all he wanted was to wrap his arms around her curves and sink into her warmth.
The day following the Council Meeting Noel finally caught up to Rich, or rather Rich caught up to him because he was sitting behind Noel’s large oak desk when he stumbled into the office. With a smug smile on his face Rich leered at him with something Noel swore looked like pity. Or disgust. “There he is,” Rich slow clapped loudly, “the man who let a woman bring him to his knees. Oh we’re real proud of you Noel.” His laugh was condescending and grating and Noel wanted to rip out his throat. If he cared enough, that is.
“Save it Rich. It’s just two months.” As far as he was concerned it was already two months more than the company deserved. He shook his head, disgusted with himself for being so naïve and disgusted with his company for their underhanded tactics to appease shareholders. And to think you thought Shellie the naïve one.
“You better hope so,” Rich threatened, his blue eyes turning icy.
Noel raked a hand through his hair, tossing his briefcase on the club chair to the side. “Jesus Rich, what the hell was Corporate thinking? I mean this is crazy!” He was still having trouble believing it himself but sleepless nights reading Shellie’s research as well as his own had cured him of that.
Rich scoffed. “Uh, that it was a great way to increase profits and hand out those fat bonuses you love so much?” He stood and walked over to Noel stopping just inches from his face. “Don’t be so naïve Noel. It doesn’t suit you. This is a legitimate method of boosting profits, period. Besides,” he clapped his back and his stern demeanor returned to Hamptons party boy, “It’s not your job to wonder why man, it’s your job to execute company plans. At least if you want to see that ‘career trajectory’ reach its final destination.”
Noel cringed at those last words. They couldn’t have stung more if they slapped his face. Him and his damned career trajectory had ruined his relationship with Shellie and put Mustang Prairie at risk, yet here he was within reach of it and it didn’t seem quite so important anymore. He looked at the man incredulously, “You are truly unbelievable, man.”
Rich beamed a perfect smile at him. “Thanks man, I appreciate it.”
“Whatever,” Noel rolled his eyes already tired of this conversation. He wanted Rich gone so he could go over a few things with Amelia and go back home.
“You have two months to come up with something better than ‘whatever’ Noel. We’re all counting on you.”
“Oh I will,” he spat sarcastically.
Rich patted his back again, this time with something akin to sympathy. “Don’t sweat it man, cutting your ties here will be easy. I’ve already told your little townie girlfriend about you and Ava so she’s under no delusions your fling was anything more than that.”
Noel’s eyes widened and his fists clenched. He could feel the boiling blood flood his body until there was only one thing to do to alleviate the flush and the thrumming in his ears. With clenched teeth and bloodlust Noel let the past few weeks’ frustration flood out through his fist, landing a blow on Rich’s perfect Nordic nose.
“What’d you do that for?” Rich whined, clutching his nose to stop the blood that was flowing like a stream down his chin and onto his expensive Italian suit.
“Get out.” Noel walked behind his desk and crossed his arms. Rich stared at him still in shock from the hit.
“You crazy son of a bitch! I can’t believe you decked me for her.” Pinching his nose he released a wheezy laugh, “I can’t believe this. Look I’m willing to forget this if you just remember what you have to do here.”
“Oh I remember, now get the hell out of here before I hit you again.” Rich stumbled out of Noel’s office barking orders at the receptionist for a new suit and tissue. Noel’s mouth formed a half smile at the sight then quickly returned to the business at hand.
Typing his letter of resignation was more freeing than he would have imagined. He was sure the thought of unemployment would make this decision difficult but his fingers flew over the keys and in minutes he was done. His conversation with Amelia came next and he was surprised at the outcome. After offering her his job, she declined and submitted her own letter of resignation. “I’m sorry Noel but I can’t be part of a company that operates the way KitchenMart does. I was at that Council Meeting and I felt ashamed and slimy for even being associated with it.” She paused and looked up to gauge his reaction. “You should have seen Shellie, she was amazing. It was just her by herself against a table full of suits arguing point for point…” She trailed off when she noticed the strained look on his face.
“I know I should’ve been there Amelia, I just couldn’t.”
She nodded, unsure if anything she said would ease his obvious pain. “So anyway I’m sorry Noel but I quit.”
“Then let’s go grab lunch,” he deleted his recommendation of Amelia from his resignation letter and pressed send, “because we’re both unemployed and it’s the middle of the day.”
Since then Noel spent much of his time in the living room with the shades drawn to block the daylight from interfering with his dark mood, hunched over his laptop which took up permanent residence on the coffee table and searched for work. However his productivity was limited as his thoughts inevitably shifted to thoughts of Shellie. He wondered where she was, if she was happy and if she was ever coming back home. More than anything he wondered if she thought about him with any fondness.
##
The chaos of the city streets always seemed to soothe Shellie’s nerves and today her nerves needed a good dose of Chicago’s unique blend of chicken soup. Autumn was in full swing with the cool salty wind whipping her already tousled hair across her face and the golden red and orange leaves rustling under her boots as she traveled parallel to the Lake. She passed city dwellers rushing from work to Happy Hour or to loving families eagerly awaiting their arrival and she wondered what her future held. Would she ever have someone to rush home to or care about her day other than Alex? Would anyone love her for her, all of her, or would she continue to find men who only adored certain assets?
Unable to answer those questions she continued walking past coffee shops, restaurants bursting with people and shoppers getting their retail fix just before closing time. She missed life among the young and alive, she thought wistfully and wondered if a change of location could improve her disposition. I could still keep my downstate clients and build my business up here, she thought as she made note of the clothing and jewelry boutiques that she passed them and restaurants like Mama Lim’s where she could make a difference.
She appreciated the time Mama Lim had given her to get her thoughts in order, but she informed her today that she wouldn’t need her full time. “It’s time you move on,” she told her over spicy soba noodles, patting her shoulder sympathetically. “You can’t live your life in a ratty old apartment above a restaurant that smells like shrimp and noodles, sweetheart. Broken hearts heal. They just need time, child.”
Shellie sighed in resignation, knowing Mama Lim was right but feeling rejected all over again just the same. Broken hearts never heal. The cracks just get weaker until the heart is no longer capable of love. “I don’t think I can heal Mama Lim but I am ready to move on.” And she realized she was ready to move on. She still loved Noel but she was resigned to the fact there was no future for them.
“Moving on means many things, my sweet girl.”
She didn’t know what that meant but she knew she had to move on. Whether her heart was ready for it or not. She knew her heart wasn’t ready but she wasn’t sure it ever would be, which hurt all the more. After Joshua she couldn’t trust her own emotions or judgment but Noel demolished the walls she erected to protect herself and stole her heart in the process. Only he was just as big a liar and cheat as Joshua, she reminded herself tearfully. The tears continued to roll down her wind-kissed cheeks as she passed a steakhouse where the scent of rosemary assaulted her senses.
As angry and hurt
as Shellie was, she knew she could never regret what she had with Noel however brief it had been. It was beautiful and it was fun and she would cherish those gourmet dinners they cooked, always trying to outdo one another from one night to the next. Those emerald green eyes would haunt her dreams forever but she hoped that someday she would be able to remember fondly how they would darken with desire to jade or warm like springtime when he was excited. Only the end was bad, she reasoned hoping the thought would stop the flow of tears. It didn’t.
Her phone chirped with a message. Mama Lim wanted her to stop by for dinner before she headed home so she replied quickly and abruptly changed directions. It would be at least an hour by foot but she needed the time to herself so she slowly made her way along Lake Michigan to the ranch house and climbed the same stairs she climbed just 30 days ago with tears in her eyes. Again. At least I’m numb this time, she thought crossing the threshold.
All the lights were off inside and she called out for Mama Lim but there was no answer. She heard a mug hit the table in the kitchen and headed towards the dimly lit room. Flipping the switch on the wall she stopped in shock at the bedraggled figure sitting at the table.
“Hey Shellie.” Noel ran his fingers through his disheveled hair, a sheepish smirk spreading across his tired face.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
His smile faltered then brightened. “Hello to you too.”
“Noel,” she said irritably.
Holding up his hands in surrender Noel answered meekly. “I came to explain some things to you Shellie. I hope you’ll give me a chance to do that.”
Throwing her bag on the nearby counter Shellie ran her hands down her face in frustration. He looked exhausted and part of her liked the idea that he was losing sleep over her. That mister too darned hot was in anguish over little ol’ Shellie. “Explain what Noel? Explain how you tried to ruin Mustang Prairie and then didn’t have the guts to show up and fight for it? Or I know, you want to explain how you made me fall for you and neglected to mention that you are engaged to be married? Whatever you do Noel, don’t explain to me why you felt the need to have sex with your fiancé in my home!” She exhaled forcefully, giving her heart time to return to a normal pace. Where did all that come from, she wondered. “Well?” She crossed her arms over her chest impatiently waiting for his response.
Conflict of Interest Page 30