by Amy DeMeritt
Bailey turns to grab her bags and I look back at Angela. She smiles and nods her head sideways at Bailey. “Go walk your girl out. We can talk when you get back.”
“Ok, thanks.”
When we get outside, Bailey wraps her arms around my neck and gently kisses my lips.
“Babe, are you ok?” I smile and kiss her lips again. “I am. I feel like a bad lesbian though.”
“Piper, it’s not just the gay community’s responsibility to educate themselves on these issues. It’s something everyone needs to understand better. It’s like the article I’m working on. Humans are much more complex than we understand. Gender is not just what’s on the surface or what our DNA looks like. It’s much more complex.”
“I love your brain.” Bailey smiles really big and pulls me into a beautiful kiss. When she pulls back, she says, “I’ll see you at your place around five. Text me if you need me. I love you, Piper.”
“Ok. I love you too, Bailey.”
Chapter Fifteen
I wake up before Bailey, so I quietly climb out of bed and go out to my living room. My mind is restless. Last night we had dinner with Angela and ended up spending a few hours between the restaurant and a small outside “wine garden” talking. It was really hard and emotional hearing her story about growing up. She went through some pretty intense periods of depression and being outcast by friends and family. She had actually considered suicide a few times before her parents helped her get the sex change. I cried when she told us that.
I’m so happy that her parents have always been supportive and understanding of her. I don’t think she would be here today if they weren’t. Angela is such a beautiful person. This world is definitely blessed to have her in it.
Being gay is hard enough, but being a gay transgender has to be ten times harder – at least. It amazes me that society accepts plastic surgery for making yourself look “prettier” or “skinnier” as normal, but the majority of society will not accept sex change surgery as normal. The emotions behind those types of surgery are pretty much the same – lack of comfort in your skin, so what is the hang up people have?
Of all the emotionally shocking things she told us, I was equally surprised when Angela told us she isn’t actually from the area. She lives a few states away in California. She came out here just so she could meet me and the other women.
Most of the “ambassadors” she selected for the meet-up live within a hundred miles from me and drove here today. The rest came from further distances and Angela assisted them with their travel expenses because she really wanted to be able to meet them. She works for a pharmaceutical company and makes really good money so she had no problem putting out the expense to get everyone together and send them on their special mission, where they were pampered and showered with gifts.
I’m sitting in the corner of my couch with my knees drawn up, wrapped in a soft cotton blanket, when Bailey emerges from the bedroom, at least thirty minutes after I quietly padded out here.
“Hey baby, couldn’t you sleep?” I shake my head and turn slightly, opening my arms to her. Bailey smiles and sits down between my legs. She kisses my lips and then turns her back, leaning against me. I wrap my arms around her and kiss the nape of her neck.
“Do you want to go alone today? To see Angela before she leaves, I mean.”
“No, I want you to come with me. But if you have something else you would rather do, I understand.”
“Nothing on my agenda today except being with you.”
“Is it too early for wine?”
Bailey turns to look at me and is quiet for a few moments, but then gives me a small understanding smile and shakes her head.
“No, baby. Would you like me to get you a glass?”
I nod my head and Bailey stands up. I watch her walk to the kitchen in only an old comfortable tee shirt of mine and feel a warm burst in my chest. Having her here with me is wonderful, but seeing her in only my tee shirt is something very beautiful. There is a kind of comfortable bond that’s created when the woman you are with wears your pajamas or tee shirts around the apartment.
When Bailey comes back, she’s carrying two glasses of red wine – mine is double the volume of hers. She must have only poured herself a small glass so I wouldn’t feel like an alcoholic or something by drinking alone at only 9am. It’s a very considerate, loving gesture.
Bailey sits down sideways to face me and we both take a couple sips of wine.
“I’m very mixed up in my head.”
“About what?”
“Pushing Angela to reveal her true self to the world. I know she has been openly gay in her real life, but she has been pretty much hiding that she is transgender. What if deciding to ‘come out’ causes her problems? What if people try to hurt her? There was a story in the news recently of a man that repeatedly ran over a transgender woman with his car. Bailey, the thought of someone doing something to her makes me sick. It will be my fault if something bad happens to her.”
“No, Piper, it won’t be your fault. Angela knew the risks of ‘coming out’. She wouldn’t be taking this leap of honesty if she wasn’t willing to deal with the possible fall out.”
I take a few more sips of wine and sit in silence for a couple minutes, just thinking. Bailey is right, of course, but it doesn’t make it any easier to accept that possibility, or get rid of the feeling of guilt I have.
“Who the hell do I think I am that I could call her out like that? I mean, what business was it of mine to basically demand from her that she tell the world her every secret?”
“Piper, you are allowing fear to poison your thinking. Angela’s revelation to you and her blog followers is a very good thing and a victory for her. I don’t think it’s something she really needs to broadcast to the whole world, and I’m not sure she will, but receiving the support she did from all of you will help her to feel more secure in sharing more of herself with the people in her everyday life. And that really was the whole point of the comment you placed on her blog – to help her to see she should be sharing more of who she really is with the people she comes face to face with on a regular basis. And I don’t mean the transgender part of her – I mean all the parts of her personality, her dreams, and her sorrows.”
“I feel like I dared a shy woman to strip in the mall to the point that she felt like she had no choice if she wanted to be my friend.”
“Piper, sweetie, that is not what you did. You really have to stop picking this apart in a negative way. You challenged her to be better than she was. Hiding a part of who you are is cowardly, just like you said. Embracing yourself and being honest with yourself and those around you, is brave and strong. Angela shared, in her blog, some of her most private thoughts, but she kept out some of the biggest parts that would allow understanding of who she is on a much deeper level. Knowing she used to be a man does not make her any less a woman, but it does help to understand where she comes from – what makes her tick. I honestly think her transition from man to woman actually makes her a stronger woman than so many ‘born-women’ I have met. Too many women are ok just being an ornament on an arm and not actual individuals. Angela is a strong woman, Piper. She will be ok. Last night we discussed keeping in touch with her, so you will have a chance to make sure she is doing well.”
I set my glass down on the coffee table and lay my head in her lap.
“Sometimes, I wish I could put all of the people I care about in a giant bubble to protect them from the evils of the world.”
Bailey runs her fingers firmly through my short hair and gently scratches her nails against my scalp. Oh, that feels so good. My eyes close and I nuzzle in closer to her so my forehead is resting against her lower stomach.
She continues to gently play with my hair and massage my scalp, while her other hand gently runs up and down my side and hip. Her hands are soothing my angst like cool aloe against sunburned shoulders.
“Piper, it’s time to wake up, babe.”
I slowly open my ey
es. When did I fall asleep? How long was I asleep for? Bailey presses her palm against my cheek and gently glides it under my chin to coax me to a sitting position. I allow her gentle pressure to lift me fully off her lap like that game kids play – “light as a feather, stiff as a board”.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I had fallen asleep.” Bailey smiles and gently kisses my lips. “It’s ok, babe. But it’s starting to get late. We need to get ready so we can meet Angela for lunch before her flight leaves. Would you like to take a shower together to save time?”
I nod my head and she pulls me up from the couch and leads me to the bathroom. Bailey quickly pulls my tee shirt she is wearing off herself and then helps me out of my tee and shorts. After getting the water on, we step into the shower together. I have a double headed showerhead. One stays affixed and one you can pull down and manipulate like a wand to reach your hard to reach areas. While I wash and rinse my hair, Bailey washes and rinses my body with the removable head. Once I’m clean, we do the same for her.
As I slip the bar of soap between Bailey’s legs, she inhales deeply and smiles, before saying, “When we have more time, we should definitely do this again.”
I smile and pull the soap out, but reenter her center with my fingers while holding the water in front of her to rinse the soap away.
“We have time for you.”
I pinch her clit between my fingers and Bailey moans. Within seconds of running my fingers over her folds, I feel her arousal pour out of her. Bailey pulls me under the showerhead with her and I replace the head I have in my hand back into its bracket. While I work my hand between her legs, Bailey holds my mouth in a kiss that makes me nearly forget my name and identity completely. When she cums, she moans deeply into my mouth and it makes me cum to feel her expel her orgasm into me like that.
Bailey rests her head on my chest and I hold her a moment while she catches her breath. When Bailey lifts her head to look at me, she is smiling affectionately.
“Piper, after we get done having lunch with Angela, do you think we can crack open another bottle of wine, sit in front of your waterfall, and have a writing brainstorm session? I want to propose an article series to my editor to go along with the piece I’m writing now and I think I want the argument of how actual gender is determined to be my next article.”
“Absolutely. Angela would probably be a good source for some ‘personal account’ dialogue if she is willing to speak on the subject.”
“Yeah, she would be. I’ll wait to ask her though till I know if my editor approves the concept. I don’t want to make her nervous or feel any more pressure right now if it’s not going to get approved.”
“Ok. Bailey, thank you for helping me to relax this morning.” Bailey smiles and kisses my lips, holding her lips against mine for several moments. “I’m your water, remember? It’s what I do.” She smiles and I release a small happy laugh. “That you are.”
We get out of the shower and quickly finish getting ready. When we arrive at the café we are meeting Angela, she is already here and is seated at a small round wrought iron table on the outside patio. She stands to greet us and Bailey and I both give her a hug before we all sit down.
“Thank you both for coming after I took up your entire evening last night. I couldn’t sleep when I got back to the hotel – I was just too high strung from yesterday’s events, so I worked on my ‘reveal’ blog post. I still need to fine tune it, but as soon as I get home, I will be posting it. I hope you both will go on and read it.”
Bailey and I both agree to read her post and Angela smiles in an appreciative way. She has a really nice smile. Actually, she has a very pretty face in its entirety. I cannot look at her and see a man at all, no matter how hard I try. I don’t think I would have believed anyone else if they had told me that Angela is a transgender.
“So, last night was pretty intense. How about we lighten the mood today? What was your first kiss with a girl like?” Bailey and I both smile and look at each other. Bailey laughs a little and says, “I’ll go first. I was fourteen, sitting on a bench at the park watching a bunch of girls playing volleyball. There was one girl I just couldn’t stop watching. She couldn’t have been more than sixteen, but she was gorgeous. She had olive skin, dark brown hair, green eyes, and a big smile that made me feel warm in my belly.”
She pauses and looks at me a moment and laughs seeing the amused look on my face. Before she continues, I interject a moment, “Should I be worried if this gorgeous volleyball player appears in town?”
Bailey laughs and shakes her head. “No, not at all. Anyway, someone on the opposing team served the ball kind of wild and it rolled over near me. I stood up and bent over to grab the ball to toss it back at the same time as the girl bent down. Both of our hands reached for the ball at the same time and her hands ended up layering over top of mine.”
“Let me guess, your eyes met and it was like fireworks in your eyes and butterflies in the belly?” Bailey laughs and nods at Angela’s supplied details to the memory.
“She smiled at me like I was the only thing that existed. I just sat there staring at her like a goober. She laughed a little and asked if she could have their ball. The obvious answer did not come out. Instead, I said, ‘you’re so pretty’.” Angela and I both laugh and comment, “I’ve been there”.
“Well, the girl was super sweet and didn’t laugh at me. She placed her hand on my cheek and softly kissed my lips and said ‘thank you, so are you’. I was so shocked my hands fell off the ball. She pulled me up off the ground and then went back to her friends to continue the game.”
“Did you ever see her again?” Bailey shakes her head. “No. I wanted to try and exchange email addresses or numbers with her, but I had to leave shortly after that. I went back to the park several times over the next month trying to see if I could bump into her, but I never saw her again.”
Angela smiles and shakes her head. “Women are such fanciful creatures sometimes. Some appear in our lives for just a moment, but can alter us and our way of thinking forever. What about you, Piper? What was your first kiss like?”
“Not quite so ‘tingly’. I was about ten, I think. I was playing ‘truth or dare’ on the playground with a big group of kids and this really weird annoying boy dared this girl to kiss any one of the girls in the circle. Of course, at that age, most girls and boys still think everyone has ‘cooties’ and isn’t looking to kiss anyone, let alone the same sex. All of the other girls backed up and hid behind each other. I was the only one standing in the circle still. So, the girl scrunched her face up, and with very tight lips, she kissed me quickly on the lips. She immediately started wiping her lips off and acted like she had just ate something disgusting. It was very obnoxious.”
Bailey and Angela both laugh and rub my arms in a mock-sympathetic way.
“Well, if it makes you feel any better, my first kiss with a woman after my sex change was a complete disaster. Remember that post I put on the blog about the ‘category kissers’?”
“Let me guess. Was she a ‘plunger’?” Angela laughs and shakes her head. “Nope, she was the ‘hoover vacuum’. My lips were so bruised I looked like I got punched in the jaw.”
“What the hell are you two talking about?”
Angela and I both laugh and Angela starts explaining the different types of kissers. Bailey looks at me with a quirky grin and tilts her head to the side a bit and asks, “Which category do I fall into?”
“You are a ‘Jenna Tourney’.” She scrunches her eyebrows and looks at Angela for an explanation. Angela explains and Bailey smiles really big and looks back at me. “Well, I’d definitely say that you fall into that ‘platinum’ status as well.”
“I think the rest of the lesbian community would agree that it is very unfair that two very rare ‘Jenna’s’ are together.”
“Hey, I am sure Bailey and I have kissed more than our fair share of ‘category kisses’ before we met. I think the universe owed it to us to match us together.�
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Bailey looks at me with a cute grin and leans over, gently kissing my lips for a moment. When we look back at Angela, she is smiling in a happy way.
“You two are beautiful together. Ok, you now have one trans-lesbian in your corner to fight off the rest of the jealous lesbians that would seek to steal one of you from the other. This kind of beauty should be protected like a National Forest. I’ll contact the Feds and see if we can get some special grant money to secure anti-lesbian radar devices around you two.” Bailey and I laugh hard and Angela smiles in a proud way.
The rest of lunch goes pretty much the same way. We remanence and tell stories and joke around with each other. By the time we are giving her hugs and saying goodbye on the sidewalk, I realize that I do still love Angela. Not in a romantic “I want to be with her” sort of way, but in a “she will become one of my closest friend’s” kind of way.
Just before she gets in her rental car, she says, “Thank you both so much for everything. Maybe one day soon you both can come see me in San Diego.”
“Yeah, that would be nice. Let us know when you land safely?” She smiles and nods her head. “Ok, I will. You both take care.”
When we are on the way back to my place, Bailey entwines her fingers in my hand and holds it on her lap as I drive. “I really like her. We need to put in some vacation time before Naomi has her baby. I’ve never been to California and I think Angela would make sure we saw all the best parts of it. Plus, I would really like to get you in a bikini.” I laugh and grin like a goofy fool.
“You have seen me in my bra and panties and completely naked several times. How is a bikini any different?”
“That’s in the privacy of our homes. Seeing you in a bikini, on the beach, and being able to ogle your body in public, but not touch it, would be such a big turn on. Plus, seeing the sun make your body glow, mmm... that would look good.”
“Babe, you are making me hot.”
“I can’t wait to rub sunblock all over your body, in the middle of a crowded beach. Oh how jealous those other beach goers will be, seeing me rub my hands all over your hot sexy body. I’ll even untie your bikini top as you lay on your stomach so that you don’t have any tan lines on your back. As I run lotion all over your back, my fingers will graze over the sides of your boobs. And when I reach your lower back, my fingers will just slightly dip under your bikini bottom, caressing your cute little cheeks.”