“Several months of agonizing withdrawal from poppy-dust turned me from the Goddess, Kirsh. And I didn't suffer through that just to come back here and thank the Shadowdancers for all they've done for me. I came back to expose them. Dirk beat me to it.”
“And what about Antonov?” he asked. “Dirk's little game has all but destroyed him.”
“Do you think if I'd walked into Avacas like this and told him about the plot to poison me that he wouldn't have had his faith shaken just as savagely?”
Kirsh wasn't able to answer that. He turned on Dirk, who said nothing the whole time Misha was speaking. “Did you know about this?”
“None of it,” Dirk replied. “Although I wasn't as shocked as you are. I knew what the Shadowdancers were capable of.”
“And now I suppose you're determined to put an end to them, too?”
“More determined than Dirk, probably.”
“We have to tell Antonov. Insane or not, none of us is the Lion of Senet. If he wants to destroy the Shadowdancers for what they did to you, Misha, then it has to be his decision.”
“It's a decision he's not capable of making, Kirsh,” Dirk warned.
“Nevertheless, he's the one who must make it.”
“I fear the decision is already made in our father's mind,” Misha said. “He's gathering an army in Omaxin. If the High Priestess has his ear, you can bet he's not doing it to disband the Shadowdancers.”
“What army?” Kirsh scoffed.
“He's called all the troops in Bollow north to Omaxin,” Dirk explained. “He's got nearly two thousand men up there.”
“And has anybody thought to ask him why? Or is it just easier to sit here and place your own interpretation on events? One that suits what you believe?”
“We've sent countless messages to Omaxin,” Dirk assured him. “He's replied to none of them.”
“And does he know yet that you're back, Misha?”
His brother shook his head. “I've only been back a day. We thought to wait until you came home before deciding how to break the news to him.”
“It's not the sort of thing you scribble down in a message,” Dirk added. “And we have no way of making certain the news actually reaches him. It could easily be intercepted by …someone else.”
Kirsh scowled at him. “Intercepted by Marqel is what you really mean.”
“That's your conclusion, Kirsh, not mine.”
“We're not going to start arguing about it, either,” Misha ordered impatiently. “I think the only way to handle this is for one of us to go to Omaxin and speak with Antonov in person. There is no possible way to make him believe this any other way.”
“I'll go,” Dirk volunteered. “Now that you're back, Misha, I'm probably better off out of Avacas anyway. Antonov will believe me.”
“Just as he'll believe you when you demand Marqel be held accountable for the actions of her predecessors?” Kirsh asked bitterly.
“I'd be happy if Marqel was called to account for what she's done recently,” Dirk retorted. “Never mind what her predecessors got up to.”
“Enough!” Misha snapped at them. “The three of us are all that stands between Senet and anarchy at the moment. I've neither the time nor the patience for your bickering.”
“I'll go to Omaxin,” Kirsh said, a little surprised at Misha's commanding tone. “I'll tell Antonov what's happened. And I'll find out what he plans to do with his army.”
Misha glanced at Dirk, who shook his head. “I don't think that's a good idea.”
“Why not?” Kirsh asked. “Do you think I can't explain what's happened as well as you or Misha?”
“I'm more concerned about your … bias on the matter, Kirsh,” Dirk replied.
“You think I'm biased? As opposed to what, Dirk? Your patently objective stance? This from the man who thinks the Shadowdancers ruined his life? Yes, I can see how your bias would be so much less than mine.”
“At least I won't confuse the facts with what I feel for Marqel.”
“I beg to differ, Dirk. Your whole sick little scheme is influenced by what you feel for Marqel. The difference is that I don't hate her.”
“No, you think you're in love with her, which is likely to be far more damaging. It's blinded you to—”
“Enough!” Misha commanded again, halting the argument with a word. “If Kirsh wants to go, then he can. Anyway, Dirk, I need you here.”
“But Misha …”
“That is my decision, Dirk. Kirsh will go north to Omaxin.”
“And the minute Marqel opens her mouth—or her legs— Kirsh is going to start rationalizing away the whole thing and before you know it, he'll start believing the reason the Shadowdancers poisoned you was for the good of mankind, and how dare we do anything to question the will of the Goddess.”
“You smart-mouthed little bastard …” Kirsh began, lunging out of his chair at Dirk. Misha hurriedly stepped between them and shoved his brother backward into his seat. Kirsh fell back and stayed there. He looked stunned. Never, in all his life, had Misha attempted to best him physically. And won.
“For the Goddess's sake, stop acting like children!” Misha ordered. “Both of you! I don't care if Dirk's insulted your precious Shadowdancers, Kirsh. He has a point. You're going to have to be on your guard.”
“Marqel was not responsible for poisoning you, Misha. That was Belagren and Ella.”
“Even so, she's not going to appreciate you telling Antonov the truth.”
“Then why let him go?” Dirk asked.
“Because you've done enough, Dirk!” Misha said, turning to look at him. “You've brought Senet to the brink of ruin and you're working to your own agenda. It's no longer up to you. This is a family matter now and it's up to Kirsh and me to see it through. Besides, you're the Lord of the Suns. There's way too much to be cleaned up here in Avacas for me to let you go north and get embroiled in that particular fiasco.” Without giving Dirk a chance to argue, he turned back to his brother. “You must leave first thing in the morning. We can't risk the news finding its way to Omaxin before you've had a chance to explain it to Antonov. Once you've found out what's happening up there, we can decide how to proceed next.”
“None of this is Marqel's fault, Misha.”
“I never said it was.”
“Just so long as you understand that,” he said. “I'm not defending what's been done to you, or suggesting it was motivated by anything other than greed. But you can't destroy innocents in your quest for vengeance.”
“Pity you didn't take such a noble stance in Tolace,” Dirk remarked sourly.
Kirsh turned on Dirk angrily. “I've spent just about every waking moment since your eclipse never happened beating back unarmed innocents with swords and cavalry charges, Dirk! Don't you dare sit there looking blameless and talk to me about hurting innocents.”
“There are no innocents, Kirsh. Those people you've been riding down in the streets of Bollow and Talenburg are the same people who merrily fronted up to Landfall every year. The same ones who cheered and shouted while someone burned alive. The same people who willingly took the Milk of the Goddess so they could do things at the Landfall orgy that any other day of the year they would be ashamed to admit they were capable of.”
“You keep telling yourself that, Dirk,” Kirsh sneered. “I suppose that way you can live with what you've done.”
“I can live just fine with what I've done, Kirsh,” Dirk told him. “Because what I did was do something about putting an end to it.”
ryk was at something of a loose end once Dirk left in such a hurry for Avacas, and in the weeks that followed he fretted constantly, fearful something might happen to change Kirsh's mind again. Caterina told him not to worry about it, but Eryk couldn't help himself. He had little in the way of duties with Dirk gone, and that left him plenty of time to imagine all sorts of dreadful things that might happen to his master. He didn't understand what was going on, but then hardly anybody seemed to know. The uncertainty of
the people around him did little to ease his concern.
The Lord of the Suns' palace was still full of strangers. Lord Rees hadn't left yet, because Lady Faralan was so close to having her baby he feared the journey home to Elcast might precipitate the birth. Eryk had always liked Faralan, but she was obviously unhappy. He thought it must be because she was so uncomfortable, but he'd overheard her arguing with Lord Rees on several occasions. He didn't know what the fights were about, although Dirk's name had been mentioned once. All Eryk knew was their raised voices had been filled with anger and bitterness. It never used to be like that. Back on Elcast, when Faralan came to visit each year, she had been a happy, gentle soul and Lord Rees had really cared for her. Now they were separated by a gulf of hostility. Maybe things would get better once the baby was born. Until then, Eryk resolved to stay out of Rees's way.
Claudio Varell eventually got fed up with Eryk moping around the palace and sent him to work in the kennels. Eryk liked the dogs and the handlers treated him with a degree of deference he was unused to. In the palace of the Lord of the Suns, Dirk Provin wasn't despised the way he had been in Mil after he left the pirates and went back to Avacas. Here in Bollow, among the Sundancers at least, Dirk was revered as the man who had exposed the Shadowdancers (although exactly what he'd exposed was beyond Eryk's comprehension) and they treated his loyal servant accordingly.
Nikolai, the kennel master, let him help care for an orphaned litter of puppies being hand-raised in the kennels. Eryk got to feed them and pet them and talk to them. But he was still lonely and feeling more than a little bit lost. He was in a strange country, surrounded by foreigners and not certain from one day to the next how his future would unfold. Eryk was never good at dealing with uncertainty so he spent a lot of time sitting on the floor of the kennels amid the pungent smell of the dogs, talking through his troubles with the puppies, who listened to him without complaint and nudged him affectionately whenever he seemed to need reassurance.
Caterina found him there, several weeks after Dirk left Bollow, explaining to a small speckled puppy about how things were always going wrong, ever since the mess he'd made of things with Mellie.
“Who's Mellie?” Caterina asked curiously, leaning on the fence with a quizzical expression. Eryk jumped with fright and then reddened with embarrassment, wondering how long she had been standing there listening to him. “Is she your girlfriend?”
“Not really. I wanted her to be, but she didn't …” He shrugged uncomfortably. “I made a mess of it.”
“Have you ever had a girlfriend, Eryk?”
He shook his head self-consciously. “Girls don't like halfwits. Not the nice girls, anyway.”
“I like you and I'm a nice girl.”
“But you're my friend. I'm talking about other girls. They think I'm dumb.”
“You shouldn't think that,” she scolded. “You're not so stupid. In fact, you have a great deal to recommend you.”
“Like what?” he asked skeptically.
“Well … for one thing, you're not cruel, Eryk. I had a friend in Tolace who married the best-looking boy in town and every time she did something he didn't like, he punched her in the face. I know which one I'd pick if had a choice between a handsome husband who liked giving me a black eye and someone who wasn't so pretty but cared for me. And you have a very good position—you're the Lord of the Suns' personal servant. Lots of girls would find that attractive.”
“Maybe,” he said doubtfully. “But I don't think it will make much difference to Mellie. She's a princess.”
“Then it's probably not her fault she doesn't love you, Eryk,” Caterina told him sympathetically. “The highborn aren't like real people. They get married to do deals and seal treaties and stuff. They don't even talk to each other properly. Look at Lord Dirk and Lady Jacinta! If they were like you and me, they'd be rollicking around in the hayshed by now. But they're highborn so they dance around each other all the time, being all polite and cagy. They never say what they really think, or what they really want. I feel sorry for them, actually.”
“I suppose,” Eryk agreed, not entirely convinced. “I just wish …”
“You're a good boy, Eryk. If I can see it, so will some other nice girl, someday.”
“But you wouldn't be my girlfriend, would you?”
Caterina smiled. “Are you asking me to be your girlfriend or just inquiring about the possibility?”
“What do you mean?”
“Nothing really,” she shrugged. “Come on. Brush that hay off your bum and tidy yourself up a bit. I came to fetch you back to the house. Prince Kirshov just arrived from Avacas and he wants to see you.”
Kirsh was in the morning room talking to Lord Rees when Caterina led him back into the house. The summons to meet Prince Kirsh worried Eryk a little. He knew things were tense between the prince and Lord Dirk and he was afraid Kirsh had come to deliver the news he'd changed his mind and had Dirk arrested again.
But Kirsh smiled when he saw Eryk. Caterina closed the door on her way out.
“Well, you seem none the worse for wear,” Rees remarked as he looked him up and down. “Still hanging off Dirk's every word and deed, I suppose?”
Eryk looked at Rees worriedly, not sure what he meant. His tone was anything but friendly. “Lord Rees?”
“Never mind.”
“Is something wrong, Prince Kirsh?” he asked, turning to the prince.
“Not that you need concern yourself with,” Kirsh assured him. “Dirk just asked me to check on you on my way through to Omaxin. He was afraid you'd think he's abandoned you.”
“Are you still mad at him?”
“A little bit.”
“You're not going to arrest him again, are you?”
Kirsh smiled but he didn't seem happy. Just … resigned. “Probably not. Things have changed a bit since we left Bollow. Misha's back.”
The news cheered Eryk considerably. “I like Prince Misha. He used to get really annoyed 'cause Dirk beat him at chess all the time, but he knew some really good stories and he didn't mind explaining things to me.”
“That sounds like Misha.”
“Are you going to stay for a while, Prince Kirsh?” he asked hopefully. “I could be your servant if you do. I haven't got much else to do with Lord Dirk away.”
“Only tonight, I'm afraid, Eryk. We just stopped in here to get fresh horses. I'm on my way to Omaxin to see my father and Marqel.”
“I miss Marqel,” he admitted. “She's one of my best friends.”
Kirsh seemed amused. “She's very fond of you, too, I'm sure.”
“Are you sure you don't need me to help, Prince Kirsh?” he asked eagerly. “I could, you know. I could even go with you.”
“To Omaxin?”
“Why not? There's nothing here for me to do. And if Lord Rees is going with you then I could be his servant, too, until you get back to Avacas.”
“I don't think so, Eryk,” Kirsh said doubtfully.
“Please, Prince Kirsh? Please, can I come with you? I'll be really good. I promise.”
Kirsh glanced at Rees. “What do you think, Rees?”
“I think he's Dirk's servant and he shouldn't abandon his post here without Dirk's permission,” the young duke replied.
“But he wouldn't mind, Lord Rees,” Eryk assured him. “Not if it was for you and Prince Kirsh. And it's not as if Lord Dirk needs me at the moment. Not while he's in Avacas doing… stuff.”
Kirsh smiled thinly. “Doing stuff? And what sort of stuff do you think Lord Dirk is doing?”
“I dunno.” He shrugged. “But it must be good.”
“Why must it be good?” Rees asked.
“ 'Cause Lord Dirk wouldn't do anything bad, would he, Prince Kirsh? I mean, I know what Tia said about him and all, but she was just mad at him for going back to Avacas.”
The prince looked at him with an odd expression and then glanced at Lord Rees. “Maybe I will let him come.”
“Why, for pity's sake?�
�
“At the very least, I'd be interested in hearing what Tia Veran and the Baenlanders had to say about Dirk after he left them.”
“Leave him here, Kirsh,” Rees advised. “You don't need the added burden.”
“I don't think Eryk will be a burden. He may even be useful.”
“Do you mean it?” Eryk asked excitedly. “I can go with you?”
“Sure,” Kirsh said. “Why not? I'm sure Dirk wouldn't mind. In fact, if you prove yourself too good a manservant, young man, Lord Dirk may have to fight me to get you back, once we return to Avacas.”
Eryk frowned. “I hate it when you and Lord Dirk fight over stuff, Prince Kirsh.”
Kirsh's smiled faded. “Sometimes it can't be helped, Eryk.”
“But he's your friend.”
“Even friends don't agree on everything.” “But they should forgive each other,” Eryk told him sagely. “Lady Morna used to say friends were like brothers and they should always forgive each other because like brothers, when you lose a friend, he's not so easily replaced. Isn't that right, Lord Rees?” Eryk was proud of himself for remembering that little pearl of wisdom. He'd heard Lady Morna give that lecture to two of the grooms she caught in a fistfight. The boys had slunk away feeling very chastened by the time she was through with them.
Kirsh didn't seem impressed, though. “Did she also say friends shouldn't lie to each other?”
“No… but Lady Lexie said something.” Eryk smiled. He was rather warming to the idea he had a quote for every occasion. “She said it takes two people for a lie to work. One to tell it and one to believe it.”
Now Kirsh looked confused. “Who is Lady Lexie?”
“Mellie's mama.”
“And who is Mellie?”
“Mellie Thorn. She lived in Mil.”
Kirsh stared at him for a moment, clearly shocked. “Mellie Thorn? Johan Thorn had a daughter?”
“I suppose. Her papa was dead, so I never met him. But Lady Lexie was her mother. She was really nice. I don't know what happened to her after Mil was destroyed, though. I hope she's all right. I think Mellie must be safe, though, 'cause she left with Tia and Prince Misha before you got to Mil … Is something wrong, Prince Kirsh?”
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