He folded the letter and placed it on his desk.
It was so hot and stuffy in the house that Victoria persuaded her grandmother to let her sit on the front porch, where she found some relief from the heat. She could walk about if she took it very slowly. Her young spirit longed for the day she would be well enough to resume a normal life.
Bodine had placed a lounge chair on the front porch for Victoria to recline on. She was never alone for very long. Some of the vaqueros were always dropping by to pay their respects. Victoria had become a great favorite with them, and they loved to make her smile.
Old Ned's concern had been a big surprise to everyone. He came around every afternoon and chatted with Victoria, always bringing her some memento, usually something he had carved out of wood, or sometimes a handful of wild flowers. The Delgados had been over and so had Clarissa and Mrs. Patterson, as well as Charlotte Baxter. Even Estancio had brought Victoria a bouquet of yellow roses. Everyone had been to see her, she thought, but the one person she longed to see the most— Edward Hanover.
Victoria had dressed in a light-green cotton gown, and put her hair on top of her head so she would feel cooler. The bandages were much in evidence, and made her feel even warmer. She would be glad when she could be rid of them altogether.
Her grandmother had placed a pitcher of lemonade and several glasses on a small table within her reach since she had so many visitors. Now Victoria reached for a glass of the cool liquid. She heard a rider coming up the road. She looked up and saw Edward Hanover.
He pulled up his horse, swung himself out of the saddle, and walked leisurely toward her. He stopped at the top of the steps and looked down at Victoria. "You are feeling well enough to be sitting up?"
"Yes. I am practically well, thank you."
Edward seated himself sideways across the top step. "You do not want to rush things. You should take great care not to overdo."
"I assure you that my grandmother is a tyrant when it comes to my health." Her eyes went to his bandaged hand. "How is your hand?"
"It is nothing. Dan is overcautious."
"May I offer you a glass of lemonade, Mr. Hanover?"
"Yes, I would like that, but you sit still. I will serve myself." Before Victoria could protest, he had risen to his feet and poured himself a glass of lemonade. Then he seated himself on the step once more, and studied her face.
"You received my note?" Victoria asked.
"Yes," Edward said simply.
"I am so grateful you rescued me. I was sure no one would ever find me."
"You need not thank me. If I had not found you, someone else would have."
"Please do not make light of what you did, Mr. Hanover. I will always be in your debt."
"You owe me nothing, Victoria," he said angrily.
She looked at him in surprise. "Nonetheless, I am grateful to you, Mr. Hanover."
"That is not why I am here. There is an entirely different matter I wish to discuss with you."
"You have my undivided attention."
His dark eyes went to her face. He wondered how much of that night she remembered. "I know how concerned you have been about the Delgados. I just wanted you to know that I have moved them to Rio del Lobo. They have their own house, and Manuel is doing all my leather work."
Victoria clasped her hands and smiled brightly at Edward. "If you do not want my gratitude, you are going about it all wrong. It is a wonderful thing you have done for the Delgados. You are really a kind man."
Edward smiled at her. "It was not kindness that motivated me, I can assure you."
"What then?"
"Manuel is a fine craftsman, and I was in need of someone with his talents," Edward said evasively.
Victoria felt her heart swell with love for him. No matter what his motives had been, she felt he was a good man, as her grandmother had said. "I am so pleased to know that Manuel and Consuelo will not have to return to Mexico after all."
"Victoria, are you still angry with me?" Edward asked, his eyes searching her face.
She thought for a moment. How could she be angry with him, when all she felt for him was love and gratitude. She did not say this, however. "I am reminded of a story that Bess told me when I was young. It was about a tiger that rescued a rabbit from a lion. The rabbit was very grateful to the tiger, and thanked him nicely, just before the tiger devoured the poor rabbit."
Victoria did not know why she had remembered that story. She had not liked it when Bess had told it to her; yet, now, it seemed to suit the situation. The love she had for Edward Hanover would surely destroy her if he became aware of it.
Edward rose to his feet and placed the half-empty glass on the table beside Victoria. He looked down at her for a long moment. "I guess you have answered my question. I will bid you good day, Miss Farraday."
He walked away from Victoria. If he had turned back to her, he would have seen the tears in her eyes, and the love that shone in them. He did not look back, however. He mounted his horse and rode for Rio del Lobo. If she had said that she forgave him, he had been prepared to ask her to marry him, and to tell her of his love; but now, he would keep his love for her locked in his heart, safe from the eyes of the outside world.
It was late August. The weather was hot. There had still been no rain to cool the temperature or to break the drought that ravaged the land. Mammaw's flowers were withering on the vines since she could not spare water to nourish them. Cattle were dying from lack of water, and many of the small ranches were being forced to sell off their herds at a loss to keep from losing them to the elements. Alice Anderson was among this number. She had promised a large portion of her herd to a rancher in west Texas; Bodine and most of the Anderson vaqueros had left, two days before, to drive the cattle to that rancher.
Victoria was feeling her old self. Dan had removed her bandages, but had cautioned her to take it easy for a while longer. She was young, however, and it was hard for her to stay about the house doing only what small chores her grandmother would allow her to do.
When Lupe answered a knock at the front door, Victoria was seated in the parlor mending one of her gowns, and wishing she could make the neat stitches that her grandmother did. Clarissa and Mrs. Patterson came bustling in.
"My dear," said Mrs. Patterson, "you look in the pink of health. One would never know you had an accident."
"I am feeling perfectly well, thank you," Victoria said. She offered them seats and asked if they would like some refreshments.
"That would be nice," Clarissa said. "It is so hot and I am parched."
Victoria asked Lupe to bring them some tea, and turned to Clarissa. "What have you been doing since I saw you last?"
"Well," Clarissa answered, "I have gone to several parties and a wedding."
"Speaking of weddings, I heard a rumor that Edward Hanover is taking a wife," Mrs. Patterson said.
Victoria felt her heart stop. "I had not heard of it," she said, hoping her voice sounded natural.
"Rumor has it that he is doing some redecorating and one of the rooms is his mother's bedroom. That can only mean one thing."
Victoria looked at Clarissa and saw a pained look in her eyes. "Do you know who his intended bride is, Clarissa?"
"No. I have been racking my brain trying to figure out who it is. I just don't know." Clarissa smiled at Victoria and changed the subject. "I have been seeing a lot of Dan lately. He is such a dear. Do you mind, Victoria?"
"What do you mean, Clarissa?"
"I know you were seeing Dan for a while. I would not like to continue if you are interested in him," Clarissa told her.
"I am going to find Alice. Is she in the kitchen?" Mrs. Patterson interrupted.
Victoria nodded. Then she turned back to Clarissa. "To answer your question, ho, I do not mind at all. Dan and I are just good friends, and I am delighted that you and he are seeing each other."
Clarissa smiled. "I am glad you feel that way. I have done a lot of growing up in the past few months. Some of it has been painf
ul, but I think I have benefited by it."
Victoria squeezed her hand. She liked the new Clarissa. "I think Dan needs someone to look after him," Victoria said. "Sometimes I think he does not eat properly, and I know he does not get a lot of sleep."
"That is what I think, too. It has taken a long time for me to see Dan's worth. For so many years I have been in love with Edward, but at last I know it is futile. Edward told me once that he was incapable of loving any woman, and now I know that to be true."
"You do not think he loves this woman he is to marry?" Victoria asked.
"No, I do not. I can almost feel sorry for her, knowing the years of heartache ahead of her. But Edward has broken so many hearts, why should one more make any difference?" Clarissa said bitterly.
Victoria felt overwhelming jealousy toward Edward's unknown bride-to-be. "Why do you suppose there is so much mystery concerning the woman Edward is to marry?"
Clarissa shook her head. "I have not figured that out yet. But I can tell you this, Dan knows who she is because when I try to question him about her, he quickly changes the subject."
Victoria frowned and rested her head on the back of the couch. "It all seems so strange to me, but there are many things I do not understand about Edward Hanover." She pressed her fingertips against her throbbing temples. "I thought when I first met you and Edward at the picnic that you were more than just friends."
Clarissa sighed. "If I had my way we would have been. Victoria, since you brought up the picnic, there is something I have wanted to say to you for a long time, but could not gather up the courage until now."
"What is it?"
"When I first met you I did not want to like you. You were so beautiful and spoke so correctly, I thought you were other than what you appeared to be. I felt so clumsy and ugly beside you."
Victoria leaned forward. "Surely that cannot be the truth. You are very lovely."
"Thank you for that, but compared to you I am only passingly pretty."
Victoria smiled. "I think you have just given me what we in Georgia call a left-handed compliment."
Clarissa looked at her with a hurt expression on her face. "In case you do not recognize it, in my own way I am trying to apologize to you for the horrible way I treated you at the picnic. I have never been good at saying I was sorry, but if you will accept my apology, I would like very much to be your friend."
Victoria laughed. "I not only accept your apology, but your offer of friendship as well."
"I have watched you for some time now, and have heard what other people have had to say about you, mostly Dan. I think if one were considered to be your friend, that person could also be considered to be very lucky," Clarissa told her.
Victoria took Clarissa's hand and squeezed it. "I must say, for one who claims she does not know how to say she is sorry, you do it very elegantly. I have a feeling that you and I are going to be very good friends, Clarissa."
"I am glad you feel that way because I could use a friend just now. You are a very unusual person, Victoria Lee Farraday. I think if I told you something in confidence, you would never betray my trust."
"I have never in my life betrayed a confidence, Clarissa."
"Can I talk to you now? I want to tell you something I have not told another living soul. It is something I did, and it has been tearing me apart inside."
"Are you sure you want to discuss it with me?"
Tears came to Clarissa's eyes. "I have to tell someone or I will just die."
Victoria removed her handkerchief from her pocket and handed it to Clarissa. "What has upset your
Clarissa wiped the tears from her eyes and looked toward the kitchen door where her mother was visiting with Mammaw. She moved closer to Victoria and lowered her voice. "It is about Edward. It happened the day of the picnic. Even now when I think about what I did I am filled with shame."
Victoria had a feeling of dread. "Are you sure you want me to hear this?"
"Yes, please listen to me. That day I told Edward that I loved him." Her voice trailed off.
"Clarissa, I know you must feel badly for having Edward know you love him, but you need not be ashamed."
"You do not understand! I threw myself at Edward that day. I told him I would do anything for him. Do you understand what I am telling you? Anything!"
Victoria remembered the day of the picnic. Edward and Clarissa had both disappeared for most of the afternoon. She did not want to hear that they had made love on the same day Edward had first kissed her.
"You do not hate me, do you?" Clarissa asked in a voice filled with misery.
Victoria felt as though she could hardly breathe. She did not want to hear any more. She could not bear the thought of Edward making love to anyone; yet her heart went out to Clarissa. No wonder she felt so badly. She was obviously carrying around a great deal of guilt, especially now that Edward was going to be married.
"Of course I do not hate you, Clarissa, but I do feel very sorry for what you are going through."
"Oh, Victoria, I just knew you would understand. You cannot imagine how devastating it was when he threw my love right back in my face."
"H-he did not . . . take advantage of you?"
Fresh tears washed down Clarissa's face as she twisted the handkerchief nervously in her hands. "He told me he had been with many women, and I would not like to be just one of many."
"You are not serious. How could he be so cruel?"
Clarissa took a deep breath. "He told me that day he had no heart, and I believe him. He is just not capable of loving a woman."
Victoria felt anger at Edward. He had been very cruel to Clarissa. The least he could have done would have been to let her down gently.
"The way I see it, Clarissa, you are well rid of him."
"Don't I know it. It was hard for me to face at the time, but he really did me a favor by turning down my proposition. I am not defending Edward, but he has always had women throwing themselves at him. I was always determined I would never be one of them, but as you see, my good intentions went for naught. He is handsome, wealthy, and he always gets his way in everything. That day I told him I hoped someone would hurt him as badly as he had hurt me, but I did not mean it. In spite of everything, I wish him great happiness. I really do."
"You are very forgiving, Clarissa."
"Not usually; but in Edward's case I guess I am. What is hard for me is having to face him after the fool I made of myself."
Victoria took Clarissa's hand and looked into her eyes. "You listen to me. Your worst crime was in loving Edward. You must not be ashamed. The next time you see him do not hang your head or act ashamed. You look him right in the eye and act as though nothing happened. Do not give him the satisfaction of knowing you still care."
"If only I could."
"You can, Clarissa. I know you have a great deal of pride."
A smile brightened Clarissa's face. "I will do it, Victoria. I promise you I will." She hugged Victoria tightly. "How can I ever thank you? You have helped me a great deal."
"My grandmother would say you have already thanked me by giving me your friendship and trust."
"Your grandmother is a very wise woman, Victoria, and so is her granddaughter."
Victoria frowned. "I am not always so wise, Clarissa. You would be surprised if you knew how foolish I can be at times."
"You are lucky, Victoria. You have the love of your Paul. You were never susceptible to Edward's charms as so many of us were."
Victoria felt her heart contract. If Clarissa only knew.
"Tell me, have you heard from Paul?"
"No, and I am becoming very apprehensive."
"You will hear some word of him before long. I would like to see you happy. You deserve to be."
"What about you and Dan? Do you think you will have a future together?"
"Dan is wonderful. He is all the things that Edward is not. Each day I seem to love him a little bit more, and Edward a little less."
"Do you think he
returns your love?"
Clarissa knew that Dan had some deep feelings for Victoria. She had seen it in his eyes and heard it in his voice when he spoke of her. She knew Victoria was totally unaware of it, and would be upset if she ever found out.
"He does not love me yet, but he will. I can promise you that, Victoria."
"I hope so. I think you and Dan would be very good for one another."
"You are right, of course. Now, if I can just convince the good doctor of it."
Victoria laughed. "I'll bet he does not stand a chance."
They both laughed, feeling a close bond of friendship forming.
"Clarissa, happiness is such a fleeting thing. If Dan is what you want, I say go after him. Although I wonder if anyone is ever completely happy."
Clarissa thought for a moment. "I suppose one gives up some things and acquires others in their place. That is the way of life." They both were lost in thought for a while; then they both broke out in girlish laughter.
"Would you listen to us? We sound like the two old wise women of the world," Clarissa said.
Mrs. Patterson and Victoria's grandmother came into the room looking puzzled. "What is all the laughter about?" Mrs. Patterson asked.
"We were just solving the problems of the world," Victoria told her with a twinkle in her eyes.
"Well, can you solve the problem of how I am to get into town, get my shopping done, and get back home in time for the evening meal?" Mrs. Patterson asked good-naturedly.
Victoria and Clarissa hugged each other as Mrs. Patterson hurried her daughter toward the door.
Victoria and her grandmother waved good-bye to them from the front porch and watched until they were out of sight.
As they walked into the house together, Alice smiled at her granddaughter. "You and Clarissa seem to have overcome your differences and that pleases me."
"Yes, Clarissa is a very nice person. She is not as callous as she would have people believe."
"I have known her all her life. Her greatest fault is that she speaks truthfully, but oftentimes without tact."
"Grandmother, did you know Edward Hanover is going to be married?"
"Yes, I had heard rumors to that effect."
Ecstasy's Promise (Historical Romance) Page 17