My skin was tingling under the slow sweep of his fingers. “I’ve grown up a little. Enough to admit backup isn’t the same thing as having babysitters. I don’t need a babysitter. But backup? Oh, yeah. Definitely need that.”
“Okay. I’ll have to run the idea by Terra first.” He wiggled. “They’re itching.”
“Sorry.”
Logan laughed. “You didn’t make them itch. Why do humans apologize for things they didn’t do? It happens all the time.”
“I don’t know. Maybe because we can’t think of something else to say?”
“Guess that makes sense.” He sighed. “Not sleepy yet.”
“I noticed.”
“I’m keeping you up.”
“I don’t mind. Rambling Logan is fun.” I liked listening to him, and yeah, liked the way he kept caressing my arm.
“Rambling? Guess I am. The queens’ council kind of upended my life.”
“In a good way, though, right?”
“Yeah. I just wasn’t really expecting to be let off the hook so soon. Or mostly off the hook. Now I need to figure out things I wasn’t expecting to have to face for a few more years.”
“Oh.”
“I wondered if living with the clan would be a problem once Terra didn’t need me as her Protector anymore. If it would interfere with her leading them, especially if we disagreed about something.” He tapped my arm. “What do you think?”
“Me?”
“You’re clan,” he pointed out, beginning to stroke my arm again.
“Well, yeah, but like, the newest newbie.”
“New or not, I value your opinion.”
Dang it, now I had to say something. “Well, I don’t see you causing a ruckus. You’d talk to her privately.”
“True,” he agreed. “It’s important to present a united front.”
“Right.” Whew. I’d said the right thing. “She’s not mean or stupid. Maybe inexperienced, but I think she’s been doing great so far.”
“She is.”
“Then don’t worry about future differences of opinion. At least, not right now.” We had to get back before that sort of thing could happen.
“I have to worry about the future. It’s part of my job description.”
That made me laugh. “Yeah, guess it is.”
“You worry about your future.”
I worried about staying alive. Pretty much the same thing. “Yes. I guess everyone does.”
“I want to say something, but I don’t want it to sound pushy,” he said.
“Go ahead.”
“I want you to be a part of my future. A part you already are, but there’s a part I hope you’ll be.”
I couldn’t not ask, because I wanted to know. “What part is that?”
“Clan, friend...lover.”
Oh, my God. Something about how he said “lover” sent a spike of heat right into my heart. I wanted to giggle like a maniac at the idea, but he might think I was laughing at him. Instead, I responded with something guaranteed to knock my giggle urge over the head. “Not wife?”
“That option’s open for future discussion. When it seems like a viable option. I think we probably have a lot of ground to cover before that happens.”
“Yeah.” Relief, excitement... I didn’t know which felt better to me. “Hey.”
“What?”
“Since we’re having a kind of heart-to-heart here, I want to ask you something.”
“Okay.”
“Do you want kids?”
Logan chuckled. “I’d love to have kids at some point.”
My heart sank.
“But it’s not going to happen.”
“Why not?”
“Black tigers can’t father children. We’re sterile.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes. No one knows why, but there’s never been a black tiger who’s sired children, doesn’t matter who they were involved with.”
I blinked, not quite stunned enough to keep from thinking “no more condoms,” even though that situation wasn’t in our immediate future. “Oh.”
“And adoption’s out, because orphaned cubs go to the closest family members,” he added. “I’m resigned to being an uncle.”
“Do you have brothers or sisters?”
“A brother, Ryan. He’s five years younger and lives with our old clan.”
“Are you close?”
“No. I wish we were, but being chosen as Terra’s Protector...”
“I get it.” And it made me sad for him. “But you’re not like, um, not friends?”
“No, we get along fine. We just haven’t gotten to spend much time together over the years.” His shoulder twitched. “That’s why I worry about Terra so much. She’s the only family member I’m really close to.”
I tilted my head and meant to kiss his check, but the angle was wrong and I kissed his jaw instead. He sucked in a breath. “What was that for?”
“I’m trying to be a sympathetic friend but my aim was off.”
“Oh. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” Could he feel the blush covering my entire head?
“For future reference, that’s a good spot to kiss if you have different intentions.”
“I’ll remember that.” I wanted to sink through the mattress into the ground. Good thing people couldn’t die of embarrassment.
“Please do. You’re blushing.”
“Gah. You’re not supposed to notice.”
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay. God. I don’t know why you’d consider dating me. I’m a complete doofus.”
Logan laughed. “No you’re not.”
“I flail through life.”
“You have a good, kind heart. That’s what I like best about you. Doesn’t hurt that you’re also smart and strong.”
He hadn’t said a word about my looks. I decided I liked that. “I’ve done bad things.”
“Sometimes life forces us to.”
“Did you take a class in how to always say the right thing?”
“They have classes for that?”
We both laughed.
“So... you’re not interested in me for my body, but my heart and brain.”
“Well, those are considered delicacies. Ouch,” he said when I pinched his chest. “I’m kidding.”
“Better be.”
“Did you want me to only be interested in your body?”
“Body does factor in, huh?”
“How people look is the first thing you tend to notice. You didn’t answer my question.”
“No.”
“Good. You’re attractive outside, but it’s what’s inside that’s most important. At least to me.” He paused. “Feel free to overshare like I have. Any time.”
I had to laugh. “You want to know what I like best about you?”
“Love to.”
“You’re compassionate. You care, even about people you don’t know, like Zoe and Tonya. You have a good, kind heart, too.” I hesitated. “Maybe it’s weird, but I pretty much liked you the moment we met.”
“Same here.” Logan moved his hand from my arm to cover a yawn.
“Oh, now you get sleepy.”
He chuckled. “I’m warm, I have a full stomach, and am having a good, quiet talk and snuggle with one of my favorite people. It’s cozy and relaxing.”
“I’m one of your favorite people?”
“Yes.”
“Who are the others?”
“Terra, Soames, Moira, Alanna. My dad.”
Sounded like I was in excellent company, and that maybe he was a little on the choosy side when it came to picking favorites. “Cool. Cuddle with Dane a lot?”
“Once. We were out hunting in winter and a storm hit. Spent two days curled up together in a snow den.”
I smiled. Good to learn he didn’t instantly equate cuddle with sex. Not that I had a problem with cuddling before or after, but sometimes just cuddling was nice. “Neat. What about the others?”
“Terra all the time. She was a demanding little thing. I don’t think her feet touched the ground her first two years of life. My dad cuddled us a lot when we were small.”
Was he avoiding Alanna and Moira? Did it matter if he was?
“Alanna is a cuddler. You have to realize a lot of us were pretty young when Terra was born. We shared a room the first few years, and slept in groups of three or four.”
“My little brothers sneak into each other’s rooms a lot so they can sleep together.”
“They’re cute kids.”
“Yeah.” I missed them a lot right then.
“Moira didn’t join our clan until later,” he said. “We were together for a while, but decided it wasn’t working out.”
Ah hah. “I like her.”
“She’s a good person. She likes you, too. If she didn’t, you wouldn’t be clan.” He winced. “That sounded wrong.”
“Nah. I get it. She’s like the spiritual leader, right?”
“Yes. By the way, she wants to talk to you sometime, about what you saw during the ceremony.”
“I saw them again, in the dream. One, I don’t know, jumped into me. That’s how I turned tiger.”
Logan hmmed. “Maybe she can figure out why you saw them. It won’t be weird for you, will it? Knowing that she and I were lovers and being around her?”
“Maybe a little, but I’m glad you told me so it didn’t come out later as a big surprise.” I wondered if he’d loved her, or still did. What if they’d been doing friends with benefits for years? “Um, how long ago was it?”
“We called it off about three years ago, and it lasted about that long, too.”
Yikes. They’d broken up about the same time I’d decided to stop being a virgin. “Now it’s weird.”
“Why?”
“My longest relationship was six whole months.”
“If it makes it better, my shortest was two months,” he said.
“Mm, yeah, that does make me feel better.”
“We should probably get some sleep.”
“Yeah, probably. Does it bug you that I’m six years younger?”
Logan countered with, “Does it bother you I’m six years older?”
“You know my mom’s more than ten years older than my dad, right?”
“Actually, no, I didn’t. Now that I do, I’m wondering whether you prefer younger men.”
I laughed. “I’m twenty-three, dude. I can’t like much younger men or people would call me nasty names. Besides, I do like somewhat older guys.”
“Am I in the ‘somewhat older’ category?”
“We’ve kissed, I’m snuggling with you, and none of it’s been icky, so, yes.”
He laughed. “Then I won’t worry about the age difference if you don’t.”
“Okay. Good night.” My aim was better. I kissed his cheek that time.
“Night.” We snuggled closer and I closed my eyes.
TWENTY-ONE
“Lady Discord.”
I groaned and tried to pull the covers over my head, but Logan’s arm pinned them to my waist.
“Lady Discord?”
Why was Logan’s arm on my covers? I cracked one eye open to find a lovely view of Leglin’s nostrils. Didn’t move away, because I couldn’t. Logan’s arm was on my covers because he was behind me. Right behind me, as in, we were spooning. I was Little Spoon. He was a purring Big Spoon.
“Lady...”
“I’m awake,” I said, wishing the elf hadn’t decided I should be.
“Very good. Breakfast is being served.”
“Okay, thanks.” I touched Leglin’s cold nose. “Good morning.”
Thump, thump, thump.
“I missed you bunches. Are the other dogs okay?”
“Yes, mistress. Soames has tended to us since you disappeared.”
I made a note to do something really nice for Dane. “What do you know about what’s happened?”
Logan woke, his purr trailing off. “Morning.”
“Did you sleep well?”
“Yes. You?”
“Like a log.”
“We make a good snuggling team.”
I smiled, scratching my hound’s chin. “It was pretty epic snuggling.”
“I thought so too. Did someone mention breakfast?” Logan rolled over onto his back. I could feel him stretching.
“It’s on the table.” I patted Leglin’s head. “You can tell me everything you know while I get dressed.”
“Dane’s informed everyone we disappeared,” I said while joining the men at the table. “And Damian was one of the people he contacted first.”
Logan looked up from his plate. “The time-lapse spell?”
“The time-lapse spell. They know about the portal. Thorandryll’s closed the club, and has people going over it. He even has a,” I had to fight a smile. “An extraction team on standby, waiting to rescue us once the portal opens again.”
“But they’ll be on the other side of the mountains, in that other realm,” Connor said.
“We’ll talk about that in a minute. Kate and Damian are part of the extraction team. Dane too.” My partner had told Leglin everything, in case I called the hound. I even knew that Alanna would take care of my other dogs when the extraction team made it through the portal.
“Who are Kate and Damian?” Kethyrdryll asked.
“Witches, two from the most powerful coven Santo Trueno has to offer. The cavalry’s on the way, guys.” I grinned, but put on my serious face after a few seconds. “Now for the other realm thing. I’m wondering about something. You said the Sundering sucked all the magical energy and shaped it into a ball. One that bounced out of sync with the human world.”
“Correct.” The elf put his fork down.
“And the Melding was supposed to put the supe realm back in sync. Which it did, except for this part, the Unseelie realm.”
Kethyrdryll glanced at Logan, who said, “That’s what the humans call all of us: supes. It’s short for supernaturals.”
“Ah. Then, yes.”
“Okay, so what we have, or I think we have, is three different realms basically operating at different frequencies. Human realm, the outer one surrounding the Unseelie realm, and the Unseelie Realm. Where did that outer realm come from?”
“I thought we decided it was part of the Unseelie lockdown plan?” Connor scratched the side of his head. “Didn’t we?”
“I think we did, yeah. Anyway, here’s what I think: that outer realm is actually an extension of this one, a failsafe to keep something or someone from getting out of here. It shouldn’t be operating at too different a frequency as the inner realm, because someone sent that ice golem to pick up people.”
All three were staring at me. I hoped they thought I was making sense. “That outer realm has managed to hit the same frequency that Dreamland operates at, because that’s where it’s been opening.”
“So if you’d tried to teleport us home when the portal was open?” Logan asked.
“We probably would’ve gone home, because Dreamland operates at close the same frequency as the human realm, and so do I. But the portal wasn’t open. We bounced off the outer realm, and I guess that might have changed our frequency, at least for a few seconds, because we landed here. In the inner realm.” I waved my hands. “That’s not the best part though. Or maybe the worst part. I think the outer realm is matching Dreamland’s frequency more often, because Nature doesn’t like being divided.”
“Coming into sync.” Connor grinned. “But that means we’ll be able to go home for sure.”
“Yeah, but what’s going to go home with us?” No one had an answer for that. “What I also think is that since I’ve been here for a few days, maybe I’m attuned to the frequency now. I mean, the Unseelie realm one.”
Logan tapped his fingers on the table’s edge. “How can you find out?”
“By doing this.” I teleported to the pavilion’s door. The men jumped to their feet. “Over here,
guys.”
They settled back down, but Logan frowned at me. “Warn me next time. What if that hadn’t worked?”
I walked back to the table and retook my seat. “I’d be in the outer realm, unless the portal was open. I’d teleport again, and get bounced back here.”
His frown deepened. “Exactly where, here?”
I waved his question away, because I didn’t know and was really glad my spur of the moment test had worked. “I can teleport again. I’m pretty sure I can teleport over the mountains, if I’m right about the realm frequencies coming into closer sync. Which means I can bring the extraction team back here, to help us get to the castle and find out what the hell’s going on with the Unseelie.”
“You mean, we can bring them back,” Logan said, his frown turning into a scowl as I shook my head. “Why not we, instead of just you?”
“Because there’s at least eight elves, Damian, Kate, their familiars, and Dane. That’s a lot of people to transport, dude. I’d rather not sprain my brain doing it by adding you three, both hounds, and Selwin.”
“Oh.” His scowl faded. “What if they’re not there?”
“I’ll wait.”
Connor snorted. “What about the gremlins? Or that golem?”
I smiled. “I’ll stay close to the trees. None of them went close to the tree lines.”
The men wanted to discuss it further, and we did, but in the end, everyone agreed that I should at least try. They didn’t want me to go alone. Kethyrdryll had to stay with the pavilion—some magical bonding thing. Logan wasn’t fully healed, and since we were supposed to get Connor home safe, that only left Leglin.
Logan was waiting outside my room after I grabbed my coat. “Hey.”
“Hey.”
“You’re going to be careful.”
“Absolutely,” I promised.
“Good. Would it be all right if I kissed you?”
“Yes, please.” I hoped it was a super, duper good one. Just in case my plan went up in flames and I dumped myself in the river with the drakes.
“Great.” He slung his arm around my waist, pulled me close, and buried his other hand in my hair. I nearly missed the chance to put my arms around him, and let out a squeak of surprise. Then his lips were on mine.
The best kisses are those that make you forget everything but the person you’re kissing. I hadn’t experienced many such kisses, and that one blew those few others off the playing field entirely.
Frost & Bothered (Discord Jones Book 4) Page 17