by Lena Skye
“Who is it?” Michael said loudly.
“It’s Patrice,” she yelled back before she said hello to me.
I walked into his apartment and only gave her a small smile. Michael sighed loudly and emerged from his room.
“What is she doing here Michael?” Julie asked, ignoring me.
“I’m so sorry, Patrice. You didn’t get my text message?”
“Apparently I didn’t.”
“We got an invitation to a huge networking event at the last minute and we need to go. This is a big one, it only happens twice a year.” He explained.
I sighed. I guess I couldn’t get rid of her after all. But if it was the only way that I got to spend time with Michael than I would have to deal with it.
“I didn’t get the text but I don’t mind coming along,” I said.
“I would love that but I only got a plus one. It makes better business sense for my manager to be there. I hope you understand.”
“Of course I understand,” I quickly replied.
“Great, let’s meet tomorrow and I’ll make it up to you.”
“You promise?”
“I promise.”
He walked over to me and gave me a huge hug and kiss.
“Okay, you won’t get out of it tomorrow. You know I’m going to hold you to your word.”
“I know, babe. I’m in a bit of a rush now.”
“Okay, I’ll call you later tonight.”
Michael walked me to the door and I noticed the smirk on Julie’s face as the door closed. When did I become such a pushover?
#Chapter6
“I’m still your mother and I’ll still come back to Atlanta and whip your ass.”
Patrice's Mom
I had a rough couple of days after the incident at Michael’s apartment.
It was hard not to internalize everything. At times, I felt like I was overreacting and at other times, I wanted to release my wrath on everyone. Is this what real relationships felt like? That whole compromising thing was for the birds. I could really do without it. I hated having to think about someone other than myself.
I know that’s incredibly selfish but it was how I was feeling at the time. I hadn’t blown up on Michael the way that I truly wanted to. If we were together a year before this, his entire apartment would have looked like a war zone. I would have flipped out as soon as I saw Julie standing at his door. If nothing else, I definitely would’ve wreaked havoc when Julie grinned at me.
Was I crazy or did she want my man? Even if he didn’t want her, she clearly wanted him. Either that, or she was intentionally trying to get under my skin. I felt so damn paranoid. I figured that maybe I should try to talk to Michael but I didn’t want to appear insecure.
All of these thoughts were going through my head as I was preparing for my night with Michael. He was finally making it up to me; he promised a night of fun. For his sake, I hoped he would come through. Bad things happened when I’m upset. I was likely to say whatever popped into my head. I’m a work in progress; God isn’t finished with me.
Before I headed out the door, my mom called. I’d ignored her call the day before because I wasn’t in the mood. She got into my head about Michael and I felt vulnerable to her attacks. I ignored her again but she started to call me back to back. I shrugged as I sat in my car and picked up the phone.
“Hi Mom.”
“Hey. I know you’re avoiding me, so you don’t even have to lie.”
“Can you blame me?”
“I can’t blame you. I was being stupid.”
Her admission of guilt caught me off guard. I didn’t know what to say. “For the first time in my life, I’m speechless.”
“Then I’ve done my job. I’m not saying that I like the idea of you dating a white man but I didn’t have the right to say anything like that. Shit, look at my life. I’m still lonely.”
“I didn’t want to make you feel bad…”
“Shut up and let me apologize. You have the right to date whoever you want and I have to butt out of it. As long as he’s not abusing or mistreating you than he’s good for you.”
“Thank you. That really means a lot to me. You know you’re crazy.”
“Of course. Where do you think that you got your crazy side from? But you’re so much better than me.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It’s just that I had my heart set on your dad. Even after he left, I still wanted him. I’ve allowed so many great men to pass because I refused to give them a break. Men don’t want to hear all of that bullshit.”
“But sometimes they need to hear it.”
“Look, I don’t know enough about Michael to vouch for him. However, I do know you deserve to be happy. In order to be and stay happy, you have to control that mouth.”
“Look at the pot calling the kettle black.”
“Yeah, but you don’t want your life to turn out like mine.”
“I understand mom, thank you for the advice.”
“What’s wrong? I can hear it in your voice, so don’t lie.”
“I’m just thinking and rethinking some things.”
“You want out of your relationship already?”
“It’s not that…”
“Patrice you really have stop this.”
“Stop what?”
“Stop giving up on every relationship.”
“I don’t!”
“You do! Every time you’re hit with some opposition, you run. Relationships and people don’t work like that. There is no such thing as perfect.”
“I know that but…”
“But nothing. Do you love him?”
“Yes.”
“Does he love you?”
“He says he does.”
“Patrice, does he love you?”
“Yes he does,” I shrugged.
“Does he hit you?”
“No.”
“Does he abuse you emotionally?”
“No.”
“Do you feel like you can depend on him?”
“I do.”
“Then you already have a better relationship than 50% of the population.”
“I know but there is more to life than that.”
“You have a lot to learn little girl.”
“Mom, I understand your concern. But you don’t know what I’m going through. I’m not saying that I plan on leaving my current relationship. I’m saying that I have a lot to think about.”
“Okay, I’m going to leave it alone. Just know that in order for you to get something, you’re going to have to give something.”
“I know mom. I’m not stupid.”
“I’m not saying you are. But you are stubborn and that’s bad enough.”
“Okay.”
“Don’t okay me. I’m still your mother and I’ll still come back to Atlanta and whip your ass.”
I laughed, “I know you will mom. I’m sorry; I don’t mean to be disrespectful. I’m just frustrated.”
“Well, it can be frustrating. Just know that I’m here for you.”
“That makes me feel good.”
I could almost hear my mother smiling through the phone, “I love you, baby.”
“I love you too. I’m going to start driving so that I’m not late for my date.”
“Have a good time with Michael.”
“I will.”
I hung up the phone with a smile on my face. My mom still had some antiquated advice but she loved me. I was surprised we had a conversation without one of us snapping at the other. I was growing up indeed. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to take her advice or not, I still had a lot on my mind.
*
My mood shifted a bit by the time I arrived at Michael’s. I felt a lot calmer and I was determined to speak to him about my feelings. What good was a relationship if you couldn’t bare your soul? I just hoped that he was receptive.
“Hey babe,” he said when he opened the door. He looked really good. He only wore loose fitting paj
ama pants with a drawstring at the waist. His light six-pack showed and I reminded myself that I needed to go to the gym. My temperature went up a few degrees as I stared at him.
“You look good, I feel very overdressed.” I looked behind him and noticed his entire home was candle lit.
“Well, today it’s all about you. So come on in.”
“I think I can get used to this,” I stepped over the threshold.
“First, we’re going to have dinner on the deck then I’m going to treat you to a wonderful massage and then…Well, we will just go from there.” He had a mischievous look in his eye.
Soon, we were seated outside and the view was wonderful. I wanted Michael for dessert. He ordered a lovely meal and we were having a great conversation. I knew I couldn’t let the night go by without going over everything. I would have done a great disservice to us both if I held back.
“Michael I don’t want to ruin our night but there is something that I need to say.”
“Uh oh. Should I be nervous? Are you trying to leave me?”
“Don’t be silly. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Good,” he smiled, “Now go ahead and drop your bomb.”
“Hush up. I don’t want to interfere in your business and you’re completely capable of making your own decisions –.”
“But…”
“Please don’t interrupt. I’m trying to get out what I’m going to say, I’m already nervous.”
He reached across the table and grabbed my hand. “There’s no reason to be nervous. You can tell me anything.”
I took a deep breath and blurted it out, “I really don’t like Julie.”
“Why not?”
“I just don’t like the vibe I get from her. I really think she’s diggin’ you.”
“First, let me say you don’t have anything to worry about. I’m in love with you. My playing and cheating days are over. You’re the woman for me.”
“But…”
“See, now who is cutting someone off? Let me finish.”
“Sorry,” I mumbled.
“What I was going to say is, Julie is one of the best in the business at what she does. She has a great track record and there isn’t anyone else like her in Atlanta. I had to give her a pretty hefty increase in pay for her to consider taking on this position.”
“How hefty?” I asked. Then I realized that it wasn’t any of my business. “Sorry, you don’t have to answer that.”
“It was $10,000 over what she was currently making. She’s the best of the best and I need her to make my business one of the best. I want to make a chain.”
I sighed, “Are you sure there’s no one else out there?”
“I’m not completely sure but I know that I’m lucky to have her. It’s strictly business between us, so stop obsessing over it. No one can replace you in my life.”
I wanted so badly to believe him. It wasn’t the answer I wanted to hear but it hardly ever was. I didn’t get to choose how he responded to me. He was his own person. See, I was growing.
“Okay, so what’s for dessert?” I grinned.
#Chapter7
“You’re not worth the 5 hours in jail.”
Patrice
I met up with Jasmine for lunch the next day. I wanted to talk to her a little bit about my night, my mom and my feelings regarding Julie. Something still wasn’t sitting right with me about her. She wasn’t worth ruining my relationship over so I really did need to hear the voice of reason.
“Okay, so then you all had hot steamy sex on the terrace?” Jasmine said.
“We did,” I grinned.
“You two are some real freaks. Anyone could have seen you out there.”
“Whatever, you’re just jealous because you and Cedric haven’t done it yet.”
“Now, I’m not saying all of that. We’ve done some things.”
“You both have done a whole bunch of things.”
“But this conversation isn’t about me, it’s about you. What else happened?”
“After that, we just talked for a while and took our asses to bed. I hate being a grownup.”
“I know but it does have its perks. For instance, you probably wouldn’t be fucking on a terrace if you weren’t.”
“You have a point,” I laughed.
“So what else is up? Michael’s launch is right around the corner. Is he acting crazy yet?”
“Not yet. Honestly, he’s pretty calm. He has a bar manager that’s helping him a lot.”
“So what’s happening with that?”
“I can’t stand the girl, Jasmine! She’s driving me insane; I just want to rip all of the hair from her head. I know that she’s trying to steal my man from me. My main problem is that when I see her and Michael together, there is this chemistry between them. Honestly, the two of them just make sense; they definitely look like they belong together. Maybe I’m just being paranoid.”
Jasmine looked at me in shock, “If things are making you this uncomfortable, there’s a problem. Stop this nonsense about them looking better together. Have you looked in the mirror lately? You’re stunning.”
I shook my head, “I’m okay. I’m not stunning, I’m cute.”
“You’re thick and you’re beautiful!”
“Some days it’s just harder to believe.”
“Okay, you need to talk to this girl. Don’t talk to her with an attitude either. Just have a one on one conversation with her and figure out what’s going on. It may all be in your head. Men and women can get along without the sex part, especially in business.”
“I think that’s a good idea. I haven’t really had a chance to speak to her under normal circumstances.”
“See, you should listen to me more often.”
“Whatever.”
“Patrice, watch your temper. Don’t fly off the handle if the conversation doesn’t go the way that you want it to.”
“I know, I know. I won’t go crazy on her. Anyway, I already have a plan in place if this conversation goes wrong.”
“I don’t know if I should be proud or scared.”
“I am sure you will be proud of me but let's hope it doesn't come to that.”
*
The following day I headed to Michael’s bar around 11pm. I knew he had a huge meeting with some drink suppliers so he wouldn’t be there. One of the staff members opened the door for me and I explained to him that I was there to see Julie. He motioned me towards the back office. I was really impressed with the bar; it was almost finished.
I knocked on the office door and let myself in. Julie looked really surprised to see me and for some reason, that delighted me. I wanted her to be off of her guard because the truth was more likely to come out that way.
“Hey, Patrice. What are you doing here? Michael is out for the next few hours.”
“I know. I came to see you.”
She laughed, “Should I call security?”
“Nothing like that, not at all. I really just wanted the opportunity speak with you under normal conditions.” I took a seat on the other side of the desk. “It seems like every time we see each other, it’s under crazy circumstances.”
“I know. I can only imagine what that must feel like for you.”
I ignored her comment and moved forward. “So I’ve had this paranoid idea that you want to steal Michael from me and so I am letting you know politely that he is mine.” I gave a lighthearted laugh to ease up the tension and then went silent. I waited patiently to see her response.
She adjusted in her chair and thought for a few moments. She gave me a slight smile before she began, “I’m not planning to steal Michael. After all, there’s no way you can steal something that’s already yours, right?”
I was stunned because her words and facial expression didn’t add up. She was giving me the sweetest smile but bitchy words were coming out of her mouth. I wanted to pop her.
“Okay, can you clarify?”
She laughed, “Oh, so Michael hasn’t told you?”