by Rae Brooks
The wall was easy to climb, especially since Calis had been climbing it so frequently lately. Kilik seemed just as deft at it, moving his hands to precisely the right locations to make sure that he never ran out of footholds. As Calis reached the top first, he glanced over the ledge to ensure that there were no nobles, and seeing none, he eased himself onto the other side.
Kilik followed soon after, glancing around warily as they touched down. The Shining District, even in the moon shifts, was far different from the Dark. The streets were paved in perfectly manicured stone so they even seemed to glisten in the moonlight. The buildings were taller, and the streets were wider. The entire place was cleaner, though Calis still thought it was overdone. “You’ve been here, I know,” he said flatly.
Kilik just nodded his head. From what Calis had gathered, Kilik had made his way into the castle at one point to save a young woman. That was a feat with which Calis had yet to come to terms. Brave—but the idea of Kilik tiptoeing around the likes of his father and brother petrified Calis. “Did you just want to show me the pretty streets?” Kilik asked sardonically.
With a grin, Calis took the young boy’s hand in his own again and pulled him towards the vine-covered wall that he often used to exit the city. No other place within the city walls was as easy to exit and enter from—including the gate, as the guards at the gate gave anyone entering or leaving quite the interrogation. “Silly, isn’t it?” Calis asked. “As the prince, I ought to have a certain degree of freedom in going and coming as I please, but there are even more restrictions on what I can do.”
Kilik smiled, in a very knowing way, and Calis could feel the beginnings of a thought trying to form. Not wanting to waste time with it, for in all reality, Calis didn’t think it mattered much—he ignored it. They moved through the colorful buildings, and now their way was lit by lanterns on every street.
At last, after a roundabout way of getting around the castle, they stood in front of the tall, dark wall that set Telandus apart from the rest of Elyst. The ominous wall that gave every traveler pause as they looked upon it. “The vines?” Kilik asked.
A grin took hold of Calis’s face at Kilik’s knowledge on the subject. Naturally, he ought to expect that someone like Kilik knew how to get in and out of these places—but Calis found himself constantly impressed. “Yes, I’ll go first,” Calis announced.
Calis had been this way the previous moon, making his way up the vines that—if anyone paid any attention—should have been cut down many, many moons ago. Fortunately, as the guards didn’t care much about the few gates they had to guard, the vines had remained. They supported Calis’s weight, so he had no doubt that they would support Kilik’s. “You would think,” Kilik muttered as they both moved up the tall structure, “that this would be considered a hazard.”
“My father may pretend that we are this secure kingdom,” Calis mused, “but we are not. Everyone is too busy fighting for power to bother with the actual security.” He kept climbing, thinking bitterly of his father, and of the woman that he was supposed to marry.
His interactions with them had been numerous in the past few suns, and Lavus’s pressure was getting impossible to ignore. Calis just gritted his teeth and kept climbing. He would find a way around this—even if it killed him. He would not marry someone like Lady Avyon, observant as she was, when he had such strong feelings for someone else. Tradition be hanged, Calis knew precisely what his heart wanted—what his heart needed, and that was not a noblewoman.
Kilik had not said much after the security comment, perhaps he was mulling over it. Or perhaps he didn’t want to have this conversation while they were still so close to the abhorrent black castle. That seemed the most logical of guesses. So, they climbed in relative silence, and Calis was not sure his body had ever felt so eager through this climb—even the first time, he had felt nothing akin to what he felt now, knowing that he would be on the other side of this wall with Kilik.
I really ought to try to reign in all these feelings, he thought idly. Not that he hadn’t already tried, but he needed to at least understand why he felt as strongly as he did. At last, they reached the top of the wall and eased their way down the other side.
Calis made sure to turn and help Kilik down the vine the last couple of paces, just because he had wanted to put his hands on the boy. That was not chivalrous at all, his mind informed him. Kilik made no comment either way. When he turned to see the expanding field on the other side of the wall, the twilight brought a different sort of glow to the surroundings. The pale light of the moon reflected off the grass combined with the dark blue of the sunless sky, and it was a pleasant sight. Certainly not that impressive, Calis mused, and then he heard Kilik’s sharp intake of breath.
“Been a while?” he asked gently, easing his fingers down Kilik’s side.
“A very long while,” Kilik said softly. “I just hope that I will be able to get back in,” he said dismally. “I was horrified—ah, without any memories, when I first arrived at the gates of Telandus.”
Calis wondered for a moment if the loss of his memories were really why Kilik had been so terrified. There were any number of reasons that Kilik may have been fearful, and Lavus was a part of every one of them. Nevertheless, he wasn’t about to force information from Kilik here. “We won’t be going near the gate,” Calis said soothingly.
Odd, Calis thought, how the walls seemed to keep out a little of the breeze. Inside of Telandus, he’d always felt stifled by the heat—but out here, he felt as though a cooling breeze was running through him. “Why did you bring me here?” Kilik asked.
Calis turned the smaller boy to face him and then tenderly placed his lips over the boy’s own. The kiss was short, chaste, as they were standing very near the Telandan outer wall, but the electrifying feeling that ran through Calis at the touch was still present. “I want to show you something,” he said, and then he pulled Kilik away from the wall.
The field outside of Telandus was nothing at which to stare. Still, there was a serenity, a quietness that the city lacked, that hung over the area, creating an ambience with the soft light of moon. There were a few hills in the distance, and aside from that, just a grassy expanse of plain. An oasis was past one of the hills to the north, and Calis had gone swimming in that quite a few times, but that wasn’t where they were going. No, they were going towards the large grove of trees that sat nearly a shift’s walk away from the wall of Telandus. “It will take a while to get there. Do you mind?”
Kilik chewed on his lip for a moment, and Calis tilted his head at the strange sense of desire that shot through him at the sight. How was it that everything Kilik did was so bloody appealing? Every one of Calis’s senses wanted Kilik—and he felt no reprieve from them in Kilik’s absence. “You are sure we will not get lost?”
Calis chuckled, though the idea of being lost with Kilik was not entirely unattractive. He shook his head, though. “I have been here plenty of times, and I know we will not get lost.” Still, though, his mind whispered quietly, the idea of not returning to the walls—of living outside of them with Kilik—called to him like a sort of siren.
They started across the grassy plain, with Calis leading the way, and Kilik walking not far behind him. Only when they put a safe distance between themselves and the wall, did Kilik ask the question that he’d obviously wanted to earlier. “Why does your father push for war with Cathalar, then? If your security is poor and you have so few allies?”
Calis was very aware of the way Kilik kept himself from the collective that was Telandus, and he found himself immensely intrigued by it. “My father is a fool. He has deluded himself. Even with Dokak’s help, we would be overrun. Most in Telandus know this, just as most in Cathalar do—I assume.”
Kilik looked pained for the smallest of moments, and then he shook his head. “But why?” he exclaimed. “There will be so much death! There isn’t any reason for it!” He sounded fervent, and his body had that tremor again when Calis looked back. “Can’t y
ou speak to him? Can’t you tell him it isn’t a good idea?”
Calis lowered his head. He had thought of talking to Lavus many times, before he realized that if he so much as whispered a word of disagreement that his father heard—he would be severely punished. If he’d tried to take a political stance, Lavus would have put him to death. “I… I am not good at speaking to my father. He does not accept counsel well, especially from his sons.”
Kilik’s brow furrowed, and Calis thought there was even more of a hue to his blue eyes. “You—you are not allowed to speak your opinion?”
“No,” Calis answered, “quite truthfully, my father would have me killed.”
The strangled noise that escaped Kilik’s throat was mildly alarming, and Calis stopped and stared at him worriedly for a few moments. “Your own father would execute you?” Kilik sounded as though he might collapse.
“You are very naïve, my friend, to not understand the magnitude of Lavus’s wrath. Perhaps I could convince you to stop your masquerade if you were to fully understand what he would do if he found you out.”
There was a spasm throughout the small body, and Calis wished he hadn’t spoken at all. They were moving again, but Kilik walked in silence for a few moments. “I-I think Lavus knows very little of what I do,” he answered wearily. “Tareth keeps it from him, or most of it, but I know if he knew the extent—Lavus might tear through every home in Dark District until he found me. But, if that happened, I assure you I would turn myself in before anyone was hurt—or even affected.” Kilik’s eyes closed. “I don’t know what I’d do about Juliet and her family. They would know that I lived with them. I don’t… I’ve thought about leaving recently. If anything happened to them, it would be my fault.”
Calis felt fury balling in his chest, and he worked to make sure that it did not explode. Kilik didn’t seem to understand the point of Calis’s statement, in fact, he was always finding ways to ignore his own mortality. “Leaving the family? I know you have saved all of their lives on more than one occasion. All you fear if Lavus discovered you is what would happen to that family? What of you? You would be… you would be…”
The expression on Kilik’s face changed only slightly, as he seemed to realize that he and Calis were not worrying about the same things. In fact, Kilik looked a little like he wanted to comfort Calis, then. “My life is my own. I do this, and therefore I know that the consequences would be my torture and eventual hanging… but Alyx, Juliet, and Aitken have done nothing. They should not be punished for my choices.”
The rest of the statement had been lost on Calis after Kilik had said the word torture. The idea was so repulsive to him, that anyone would hate Kilik, who was obviously only trying to help, enough to torture him—to hang him—was disgusting. No, Calis would not let that happen—ever. “You speak about that as though you’ve earned it,” Calis barked.
“About what?” Kilik asked, and his eyes flickered with genuine confusion.
“Hanging,” Calis spat, “torture.”
This seemed to bring a whole new set of pain into those blue eyes. Oh, what Calis wouldn’t have given to remove it from there—permanently. What was Kilik so afraid of? “I told you we both have our secrets,” Kilik answered solemnly.
No—Calis could not believe that anything the young man before him had ever done would merit torture or hanging. Especially after the amount of lives he’d saved, the amount of risk he’d put himself in to help ungrateful rats. Kilik could have done nothing to deserve death—or even pain. “Oh? Do we?” Calis growled. “You have killed someone, then? Tortured them? Hurt them in any way?”
The blue eyes flickered with hesitation, and he glanced in front of him, pretending to focus on their route through the ever taller grass. “I, well no. Just because I have never killed someone doesn’t mean I haven’t done something wrong. I’m sure I have hurt someone along the way—nobles, for that matter,” he said cheerfully.
“After they’d earned it,” Calis answered sharply.
Kilik sighed. “You don’t understand, Calis. I wish…” There was the strangest longing in his voice, on his face, then. “I wish I could make you understand. But I can’t… if you knew… if… you would want me hanged just as quickly as your father.” Calis flinched, as though Kilik had struck him. Calis felt like Kilik had struck him. There was terror in those blue eyes, and Calis knew that Kilik believed, without doubt, that he was speaking the truth. “But… you shouldn’t be with me.”
“You’re wrong,” Calis answered, returning the confidence with which Kilik had spoken tenfold. There was a black anger on his face, at whoever had convinced Kilik that whatever he’d done would ever make Calis want to harm him. “I don’t care what you’ve done, or who you are, Kilik. I would never see you as anything other than how I do now.”
That was true, irrefutably so, and Calis had no problem saying so. Perhaps Kilik had performed some terrible deed, and others may think he deserved punishment for it—but Calis knew that he didn’t, even now, knowing nothing. Kilik seemed a little taken back by the declaration. “Let’s just… walk,” Kilik said carefully.
Not wanting to harp on the issue, as it was clearly one that Kilik was not able to convey properly at this juncture, and one that was going to cause the young vigilante considerable heartache, Calis walked. Desire prickled up his spine, and suddenly, he found himself wondering as to why he was bothering to fight with it.
All at once, he stopped, seized Kilik by the waste and brought their lips together in a kiss far less chaste than the last. In fact, Kilik’s back arched against his fingers so that Calis found himself leaning over the young man to kiss him. That familiar want for more caught hold of his mind, and he renewed his kiss. Instead of using both hands to hold Kilik’s back, Calis brought the other up to the short, black hair, cradling his head.
Calis’s mouth pulled against the softness of Kilik’s lips, biting just enough on Kilik’s lower lip to produce a whimper from the smaller male that made its way down Calis’s throat. Calis stopped biting, then, and just pressed his lips again to Kilik’s—the heat of their breath intermingling wrapping around both of them. Finally, Kilik wrapped his arms around Calis’s neck, kissing back with unprecedented fervor. He pushed enough so that they both stood upright, and Calis staggered back, moving his fingers through the black hair until they touched Kilik’s face.
Their lips fought one another, between breath that Calis couldn’t tell was his or Kilik’s, and finally their tongues pressed into one another. The feel of Kilik’s mouth, of his skin against Calis’s fingers, of the strength of his tongue wrestling Calis’s—nearly overwhelmed Calis so completely that he tackled the young commoner to the ground.
Kilik’s fingers slid down his back with just the right amount of pressure so that Calis could feel his arousal pulsing to an entirely new level. After a considerable amount of fighting with his own desperate desire, he pulled back, holding Kilik’s flushed face in his hands as he stared into his eyes. And staring into those blue eyes did nothing to quell his arousal. They were both panting, and Kilik looked mildly ashamed of himself.
“Not here,” Calis breathed, using every ounce of willpower he had to keep their faces the few hairs apart that they were. Kilik’s breath on his lips sent a tingling sensation through Calis’s body so that it shivered. So, in order to keep control, Calis eased Kilik away from him and took a few steps back. His body quivered with need, and his skin prickled in all the right places. “Kilik! By the Light, you are… impossible to resist.”
Kilik was panting, and his cheeks flushed at the word resist. Calis smiled at him, though he worked to not focus on the way Kilik’s skin brightened at the embarrassment. Why was everything about this bloody person so necessary to Calis? He was desirable. Every little part of him was desirable all on its own. Lips, breath, eyes, cheeks—enough! Calis tried to focus on where he wanted to show Kilik, for if they had gone much further here, they never would have gotten there.
“Apologies,” Kili
k whispered.
“For being irresistible?” Calis asked.
Though Calis wasn’t looking at the small male, he was sure that if he was—he would have seen the red intensify. “I lost control of myself,” Kilik said contritely, “that’s never happened before. I shouldn’t have…”
“I know the feeling,” Calis chirped. “I’m glad you did. I worried you might simply be humoring me in my feelings, simply because you don’t want to say no. I am, after all, important. Most would never turn me down, even if they didn’t like me at all. Now I know that you find me attractive, if nothing else.”
Kilik offered a wry grin, and the dimples on his face sent a swell of nausea—caused by that same burning desire—to move through Calis. How was he supposed to keep up this resistance? They still had quite the walk! “You know nothing of your attractiveness, your highness. All you know is that you kiss quite nicely.”
Calis feigned mental injury, and then pursed his lips a little as he took Kilik in. That grin was positively flawless. “You don’t find me attractive, Kilik?” A smile wedged its way onto his own lips, partially because he was amused, and partially because the grin on Kilik’s lips was infectious.
“I will have to get back to you on that,” Kilik said coyly. With that, they both started off in the direction Calis had originally set for them. Though, the need to pounce on Kilik and tear that white shirt from his body was ever present.
As they drew nearer to the trees, Kilik seemed to be observing them closely. His body seemed a little tense, despite his attempts to have conversation. They spoke about nothing, and yet Calis had never been more enthralled in a conversation. “Juliet has never really felt like a mother. She worries like one, but I don’t want to get close enough to her—I don’t want her to feel like that is her responsibility.”
“Only you would think like that,” Calis said. “I see the way she looks at you—she already feels that way about you. She would be heartbroken if anything happened to you. You have done a lot for them.”