by Diana Palmer
Colt didn’t say anything as they transported him out of the training room to the ambulance. He knew damned good and well that Kaylee wouldn’t be there when they arrived at the hospital.
After what happened three years ago, combined with the way he’d talked to her this evening, he’d be lucky if she ever spoke to him again.
A month after seeing Colt at the Professional Bull Riders event, Kaylee still found herself thinking about their encounter. He’d been the last person she’d wanted to see. From his reaction, it had been crystal clear that he’d felt the same way about seeing her.
She poured herself a fresh cup of coffee and wandered into the living room of her small apartment to curl up in a corner of the couch. Their run-in had dredged up some painful memories that she thought she’d worked through. Apparently she’d been wrong.
Over the years, cheering for Colt and her brother, Mitch, had become a tradition. She’d been on hand that fateful weekend three years ago for the PBR event in Houston. But what had started out as a typical Saturday evening of watching the two men she loved most in the world compete in the first round of bull riding had suddenly turned horribly tragic.
Colt had successfully ridden the bull he’d drawn, then helped Mitch pull his rope to get ready for his ride. But the moment the chute gate opened, Kaylee had known Mitch was in serious trouble. The bull’s first jump had been violent, whipping Mitch forward and slamming his face into the back of the bull’s head, knocking him out. Bullfighters had moved in immediately, but before they could even distract the animal, Mitch had landed on the ground in front of the angry beast.
Tears welled in Kaylee’s eyes as she relived the horrific events. The bullfighters had distracted the bull enough to keep it from hooking Mitch with its horns, but as the animal jumped over Mitch to go after the bullfighters, its back hooves had come down full-force in the middle of Mitch’s chest.
With no regard to his own safety, Colt had vaulted the back of the chute and run to protect her brother. After he’d made sure someone was helping Mitch, he had come looking for her in the crush of people behind the chutes. He’d accompanied her to the hospital to wait while Mitch was in surgery. Then later, he’d held her when they received the news that her only brother—her only living relative—had died on the operating table.
“M-mommy!” a little voice cried from down the hall.
The sound of her daughter awakening from her afternoon nap was a welcomed release from the disturbing memories. Setting her coffee cup on the end table, Kaylee rose from the couch. As she walked down the hall to see about Amber, Kaylee wiped away the last of her tears. She had Amber to think about now. She didn’t have time to worry about a past she couldn’t change.
“Did you have a bad dream, sweetie?” she asked, lifting the little girl from her small bed.
Amber shook her head sleepily, put her finger in her mouth and buried her face in her mother’s neck.
“It’s all right. Mommy won’t let anything hurt you,” Kaylee said, hugging her daughter close.
She started into the living room to sit in the rocking chair with Amber, but the ringing doorbell had her detouring to see who the current salesman was and what he was trying to sell today. Turning on the CD player she kept by the door, she smiled at Amber as the sounds of a snarling German Shepherd filled the room.
“One of these days, Mommy’s going to get a real dog with enormous teeth and an insatiable appetite for door-to-door salesmen.” Making sure the security chain was in place, Kaylee took a deep breath and reached for the doorknob. “Until then, let’s see how fast we can send this joker on his way.”
As Colt waited at the door to the second-floor apartment, he adjusted the sling holding his left arm snug against his body and looked around at the shabby building. What was Kaylee doing here instead of living on her ranch up in the Oklahoma panhandle?
While he’d been recuperating last month, he’d done a lot of soul-searching and had come to the realization that he had to find her and make things right. He shook his head. He’d been ready to jump on that paramedic for his lack of respect toward her, yet, to his chagrin, he’d realized that he hadn’t acted any better. He’d snapped at her for no other reason than the fact that she’d witnessed him give in to the pain of a broken collarbone like some little kid.
But when he’d gotten back on his feet, he’d gone to the Lazy S only to find that Kaylee had sold the ranch and moved to Oklahoma City shortly after Mitch had died. He’d had to resort to searching through the phone book to find her. Fortunately there’d only been one Kaylee Simpson listed in the area.
The door suddenly opened as far as the security chain would allow. “I don’t care what you’re selling. I don’t want—” Kaylee stopped abruptly. “Colt?”
Pushing the wide brim of his Resistol up with his thumb, he rocked back on his heels, chuckling at the sound of a snarling dog. “Does that recording of Kujo really chase off door-to-door salesmen?”
She stared at him through the narrow opening as if she couldn’t quite believe her eyes. “W-what are you doing here?”
He winced at her blunt tone. She sure didn’t seem very happy to see him. All things considered, he couldn’t say that he blamed her.
Hoping to tease her into a better mood, he grinned. “Well, hello to you, too, brat. You want to shut off Kujo, now that you know it’s me and not somebody trying to sell a vacuum cleaner?”
She turned away and the sound of the snarling dog ceased. “I’m sorry. Hello, Colt.”
“Me see,” a little voice said a moment before a set of tiny fingers appeared around the edge of the door in an effort to open it wider.
Colt frowned. “Do you have company?”
“No, but this really isn’t a good time,” Kaylee said, prying the baby’s fingers from the door.
The panic suddenly filling her violet eyes bothered him. A lot. “Are you all right, Kaylee?”
She nodded. “I’m fine.”
“Me see, Mommy,” the little voice insisted. “Me see.”
“Not now, sweetie,” Kaylee said gently.
Colt felt as though he’d been sucker punched. Kaylee had a child? Was she married?
“We need to talk,” he said seriously.
He told himself that Mitch would want Colt to make sure she was doing okay. But the truth was, he wanted to know what was going on.
“I can’t imagine what you think we need to talk about.” She gave him a one-shouldered shrug, but he could tell from the tone of her voice that she was nervous as hell about something.
“Come on, Kaylee,” he said, watching her closely. “I drove all the way down here from the Lonetree just to talk to you. The least you can do is give me five minutes.”
Her defeated expression caused the air to lodge in his lungs. Something was definitely going on, and Colt had every intention of finding out what is was.
“Kaylee?”
She closed the door, released the chain, then swung it wide for him to step into the tiny apartment. “I’m sorry about the mess,” she said, pointing to the toys scattered on the floor in front of the couch. “I wasn’t expecting anyone.”
Colt turned to tell her he was used to seeing toys scattered all over his two brothers’ homes, but the words died somewhere between his vocal cords and opened mouth. The baby riding Kaylee’s hip was a little girl with raven curls. Her face was buried shyly against Kaylee’s neck, but something about the child caused his scalp to prickle and his pulse to race.
“Is she yours?” he asked cautiously.
Kaylee stared at him for what seemed like an eternity before she slowly nodded. “Yes. This is my daughter, Amber.”
At the sound of her name, the baby looked up, but when she saw him staring at her, she stuck one tiny index finger in her mouth and once again hid her face in Kaylee’s shoulder.
The glimpse Colt had gotten hadn’t been much, but it was enough to see that the little girl’s eyes were blue. A vivid blue. His sisters-in-law, Annie a
nd Samantha, called it “Wakefield blue.”
His heart pounding against his ribs like a jungle drum, he had a hard time drawing air into his lungs. The child had to be around the same age as his brother Brant’s little boy, Zach. From there it didn’t take much for Colt to do the math.
Swallowing hard, he asked, “She’s mine, isn’t she, Kaylee?”
Colt watched her bite her lower lip to keep it from trembling. He knew the answer, but he needed to hear her tell him.
“Kaylee?”
She took a deep breath, then defiantly met his gaze. “Yes, Colt. Amber is your daughter, too.”
Chapter Two
“Dammit, Kaylee, why didn’t you tell me?” Colt demanded. Conflicting emotions twisted his gut and he had to force himself to take several deep breaths in an effort to stay calm. “Didn’t you think I had the right to know about my own daughter?”
Anger flashed in her violet eyes. “No.”
Colt wasn’t sure how he’d expected her to answer, but the vehemence in her tone surprised him. He’d never seen her this angry before.
“Why not?” he asked, his own anger flaring.
If anyone had the right to be pissed off here, it was him. Kaylee had been the one who kept him from knowing about his child.
The baby started to whimper and clutch at her mother. Apparently their raised voices were upsetting her.
“Would you like to have some juice, sweetie?” Kaylee asked, her voice once again soft and gentle as she rubbed the little girl’s back.
The child nodded.
“Let me get her settled down.” Kaylee’s voice was calm, but the look she gave him was pure defiance. “Then we’ll talk.”
“You’re damned right we will,” he muttered, watching her carry her daughter—his daughter—into the kitchenette.
His daughter.
Colt’s chest swelled with a feeling he’d never before experienced. He was the daddy of a two-year-old child—a little girl who looked just like him. The thought caused a lump to form in his throat and made it hard as hell for him to drag air into his lungs.
As the knowledge sank in, questions flooded his mind. How could Kaylee have done this to him? Why hadn’t she let him know that their only night together had made her pregnant?
He wasn’t sure what her reasons had been, but he had every intention of finding out. Removing his cowboy hat, he set it down beside a CD player on a shelf by the door. He wasn’t going anywhere until Kaylee gave him some answers. And, he decided as he ran a frustrated hand through his thick hair, they’d better be damned good ones.
Kaylee brushed past him to set Amber on the floor with her toys. He waited until she handed the toddler a small plastic glass he’d heard his sisters-in-law refer to as a sippy cup before he asked, “Were you ever going to tell me about her?”
Kaylee picked up a mug from the coffee table. “No.”
Shocked, Colt started to ask her why, but she stopped him by motioning for him to follow her into the kitchen. Walking behind her, he tried not to notice that her cutoff jeans hugged her cute little rear to perfection, or the fact that they exposed a lot more of her long, slender legs than they covered. When she reached up to get another coffee cup out of the cabinet for him, he swallowed hard. Her hot-pink tank top pulled away from the waistband of her cutoffs and gave him more than a fair view of her smooth, flat abdomen.
He shook his head. What the hell was wrong with him? Kaylee had not only kept his only child a secret from him, she was Mitch’s little sister. And although Colt had given in to temptation once, he couldn’t—wouldn’t—let it happen again.
Pouring them both a cup of coffee, she indicated that he should sit at the small table. When he lowered himself into a chair, she seated herself across from him so that she could watch their daughter play with a small teddy bear.
“As far as I’m concerned, you never needed to know about Amber,” she said, glaring at him.
Anger and confusion raced through him and he had to wait a moment before he could speak. Losing his cool wouldn’t net him the answers he needed.
“Being pregnant was the reason you took that year off from school, wasn’t it?” he asked, suddenly understanding her evasive answers in the training room the night he’d been injured. “Yes.”
“You should have told me,” he said, trying to keep his voice even. “I would have helped.”
“I didn’t want or need your assistance.” Her voice shook with emotion. “I never wanted you to know about Amber.”
“Why, Kaylee?” He’d never seen her this stubborn. But then, he was just as determined. “What made you think I didn’t have the right to know that I’d fathered a child?”
“You gave up the right,” she said without looking at him. Her voice was a little more calm, but her words couldn’t have held more resolution.
His own irritation won over his vow to remain coolheaded. “How the hell do you figure that?”
“The morning after Mitch’s funeral I got the message loud and clear.” She met his gaze head-on and the mixture of hurt and resentment sparkling in her eyes stopped him cold. “You wanted nothing more to do with me. When I discovered I was pregnant, I assumed those feelings would encompass my baby, as well.”
The guilt that had plagued him for the past three years increased tenfold. He’d not only slept with his best friend’s sister the night after they’d laid the man to rest, he’d taken her virginity. Colt knew that he’d handled things badly the morning after he’d made love to her, but he’d been so ashamed of his actions, he hadn’t been able to face himself let alone her.
“Kaylee, that’s not the way it was. I—”
“Oh, really?” she interrupted hotly. “Just how many times in the past three years have you tried to get in touch with me, Colt?”
He didn’t think it was possible to feel lower than he already did, but Kaylee had just proven him wrong. “I know that if they handed out prizes for tactless jackasses, I’d win hands down. But there’s a reason—”
“Too little, too late,” she said, rising to her feet. “I’m really not interested in hearing why you left that morning without waking me or even leaving a note.” She picked up his untouched coffee and poured it down the sink.
“Hey, I’m not finished with—”
“Yes, you are.” She walked to the door. “I’d appreciate it if you’d go now. All I’m interested in is you leaving Amber…and me alone. We’ve done just fine…without you.”
He detected the hitch in Kaylee’s voice and knew she was fighting tears. The thought that he’d caused her such emotional pain made him feel physically ill.
Taking a deep breath, he rose and followed her. He needed time to come to grips with everything that he’d learned in the past hour, as well as to figure out how to make Kaylee listen to him.
“I think it would be best if we continue this conversation after we’ve both had a chance—”
“No, Colt,” she said, shaking her head. “You gave up that chance three years ago when you left me behind without a backward glance. You got what you wanted, now let me have…what I want.”
The single tear sliding down her pale cheek just about tore him apart. “What do you want, Kaylee?”
She took a deep breath and impatiently wiped the droplet away with a trembling hand, then pointed toward the door. “I want you to walk out…the way you did that morning three years ago and…never look back.”
“I can’t do that, honey,” he said, reaching out to wipe another tear from her satiny skin with the pad of his thumb. “I’ll be back tomorrow after we’ve both calmed down.”
“Please…don’t.” Tears coursed down her cheeks unchecked as she stepped away from his touch. “It would be best…if you went back…to the Lonetree Ranch in Wyoming and forgot…we exist.”
“That’s not going to happen,” Colt said gently.
He picked up his Resistol and placed it on his head, then looked over at Amber playing quietly with her toys. She was curiousl
y watching him. But the moment she realized he was looking back at her, she smiled shyly and hid her face behind the teddy bear in her tiny hands.
He fell in love with his daughter right then and there.
“I’ll see you tomorrow.” Turning to open the door, he didn’t think twice about leaning down to place a kiss on Kaylee’s tear-stained cheek. “We’ll get all of this worked out, honey. I promise.”
The next day Kaylee nervously sat at the kitchen table awaiting Colt’s return. She dreaded the upcoming confrontation, but at the same time, a small part of her looked forward to seeing him again. And that was a huge problem.
She’d fallen in love with Colt Wakefield almost the moment she’d met him. Her mother had called it a schoolgirl crush and told her that she’d grow out of it in time. But Kaylee had always known better. Over the years her feelings for him hadn’t diminished, they’d only grown stronger.
But after that fateful morning when she’d awakened to find him gone, she’d forced herself to forget about him and to move on. She’d had to. She wouldn’t have survived the past few years if she hadn’t.
Unfortunately she’d discovered yesterday after noon that he still affected her in ways she thought she’d put behind her. When Colt touched her, she’d felt the familiar racing of her heart, the jolt of excitement that being near him had always caused. But the most disturbing discovery of all had been the fact that he still had the power to cause her emotional pain.
“Mommy, see!”
Kaylee looked up to watch Amber laugh and point to the animated vegetables dancing and singing their way across the television screen.
Smiling, she walked into the living room to join her daughter. “You like that, don’t you, sweetie?”
“No,” Amber said, her soft shoulder-length curls bouncing as she nodded her little head affirmatively.
Kaylee grinned. One of these days Amber would get the words and the body language synchronized. As she gazed at her daughter, Kaylee was once again struck by how much Amber looked like Colt. The resemblance was amazing, and she had known the minute he saw Amber that he’d realize she was his child. She had the same dark hair and vivid blue eyes that all the Wakefields shared.