“Generational curses, man. It’s too easy to keep repeating the patterns of our parents. I refuse to.”
“I hear you. The old stuff of our parents and the new stuff we bring to our own kids.”
“The buck needs to stop here. I’ve got my own set of issues.”
The two were silent for a minute. Mason thought about his own brother’s problems, wondering how in the world he dealt with what happened to Fatima over the years. But he just had to know one thing. “Let me ask you something, bro.”
“What?”
“Why is it that you never asked Fatima to marry you?”
Claude looked forward without even a blink. He opened his mouth and then closed it. He licked his lips and then spoke. “I don’t know. I think maybe deep down I always knew she wasn’t wife material. She always seemed to need time to be alone, so she’d say. Now I know what that was all about. She was spending those alone times with a madman.”
Mason perused his surroundings, looking up at the tall palm trees and then up to the dark endless sky. “Yes, life is deep. My own daughter doesn’t get enough attention so she takes my car on an excursion and wrecks it.”
“Oh, she’s just being a teenager. She probably drove by her friend’s house and thought it made her seem cool. Surely she didn’t mean to wreck it.”
“Whatever she meant to do, I’ve got to make some changes.”
“And what’s up with Mercedes confronting Heidi tonight?” Claude asked.
“She found some pictures in my car.”
Claude looked like he did not need to know the details. “I won’t ask. And of all the nights, on your anniversary. You know Venus asked me why I hired Heidi. She thinks I hired her because she’s your lover or something. Plus, I think Venus told Mercedes that you and I own Heidi’s house.”
“Sometimes I really can see how Venus would have suspected something. But Mercedes has never been the type to be insecure. Not like this,” Mason said.
“She still doesn’t know about Cicely?”
“You mean about her being Dad’s child? No.”
“And you’re not going to tell her?”
“After all of this, I think that’s something I’m definitely going to have to do. And it won’t be about exposing Dad’s secret at that point, it will be about why it took me so long to tell her.”
“I’ll give it to you. You’ve held steadfast to your promise to Dad to keep that from Mom.”
“Oh, please. Mom has known about his love child all along. She thinks her name is Sissy.”
“Damn. I guess Dad wasn’t the slick ass player we thought he was.”
“Mom was the slick one. She knew every step he made before he made it.”
Claude uncrossed his legs. “Well, bro, I’m about to call it a night. I’ll get that sign up out front as soon as possible.”
“Thanks for having my back.”
“That’s what brothers do.” Claude stood up yawning. He stretched his arms up high.
“Right, right. And by the way, if you’re looking for your driver’s license, Mom had it in her purse. And some of your cash too, dude.”
“Oh, so Mom’s been snooping, huh? I thought I was missing some cash. I’m going to have to keep a closer eye on her,” Claude replied.
“I’m telling you she’s a busybody.”
Claude shook his brothers hand and then left, leaving Mason to himself.
Later that night, Claude drove to his deserted office to get going on listing Mason’s house. He stepped inside without turning on the lights and sat at his large, circular desk.
He turned on his computer and logged onto the Internet. The light from the screen shined directly upon the wooden-framed family pictures on his desk. Each photo included an image of his wife. One with him, one of Venus and her dad, and one with Cameron after one of his basketball games.
Claude gazed at his missing lady. He took a moment to notice her, picking up each photo and examining it closely, as though she were a stranger. He took a moment to feast his eyes upon her unique beauty, seeing her as an outsider would. He saw her contagious, pretty smile, her wavy hair, and her flawless redbone skin. He admired her style, grace and stature. His stomach churned with a longing for her as a woman and as a friend. He saw this prize as something he’d lost out on. Claude put the examined photos down, and then leaned over to pick up the office phone. He called Venus on her cell phone but there was no answer. He then called her dad’s number.
“Hello, Mr. Ortiz. How are you? Long time no see. Listen, is Venus there? She’s not. Well, do you know where she went? No. Please ask her to call me when she gets in. I’d really appreciate it. Thanks.”
Venus’s father’s one-word answers convinced Claude that he was bothered. Bothered that the very man who vowed to love, honor, and cherish let his daughter get away. Claude felt his father-in-law’s distance was understandable. But he was about to try to fix things.
Claude made another call to her cell phone. Again the machine came on.
“Venus, I don’t want to have to show up over there unannounced, but I will if I have to. I’d like to hear from you. Eventually, Cameron will be going off to college, you know. And then, one day, I’m going to have to face the fact that eventually, Mom is going to pass away. I’ve lost so much, Venus. I can’t lose you, too. I just can’t. At times I don’t know what to say or how to say it. See, I admit that I’ve spent many, many days trying to deal with my own pain. I apologize for trying to blame you for all of the secrets Fatima kept from me. I know that you were just being a friend. Venus, please call me so that we can work this out. All I keep thinking about is the first time we went for Mexican food to talk about our pain over losing Fatima. It was like you completed my thoughts. We felt everything the same. And then when we met up in Vegas to hang out, my proposal just sprung from my lips, as if it was so natural, as if it was just meant to be.” The voice mail cut him off. He called again. He hoped Venus would answer by some stroke of luck, but she did not.
“Venus, I got cut off. Like I said, it seemed to be so natural. We said our vows at the chapel and came home as husband and wife. It felt so right. I don’t know what went wrong. I suppose I didn’t take the time to notice the signs that you felt like a replacement. But I get it. You will always be Fatima’s friend. And I want you to always be my wife. Because you and me, we live on and we must be happy in spite of what people think. That is why we’re here. To be happy in love. This feeling I’m feeling right now is not happiness. I feel alone and broken. Please reconsider your decision and come home. Please. I’d really appreciate it. I love you. And I can love you exactly the way you need to be loved. Show me how. And one more thing, in case I didn’t say it before; I’m so sorry we lost our baby. I’d like to try again. Good-bye.”
Claude logged onto the multiple listing site and added the Bedford Avenue home for 1.2 million. He took a for sale sign from his office, shut down the computer, and exited his place of business. He headed to Mason’s house to hammer the sign into the front lawn. And then he leisurely drove home to Cameron, glancing down hoping that his cell phone would ring. It did not.
Chapter 17
It had been almost two weeks since the anniversary party and Star’s fender bender. Mason and Mercedes agreed that it was the perfect time for family therapy.
Dr. Little, a distinguished-looking man in his mid-fifties with a classic jaw and hazel eyes, sat in his sofa chair while Mason and Mercedes sat on the dark sofa across from him in his luxurious Westwood office. His many framed awards, accreditations, diplomas, degrees, and family portraits filled the walls. He gave Mason and Mercedes a friendly smile, put on his reading glasses and began to run down his plan.
“The first thing we need to do is agree that whatever is said here is adult conversation for your benefit as parents and spouses. It is not to be used against your children or each other at any time. Is that agreed?”
“Yes,” Mason and Mercedes said in unison, nodding their heads toward him a
nd one another. Mercedes rotated her new ring back and forth without even realizing it.
“Now, because I’ve talked to your son and daughter in detail, I’ve taken these conversations and converted them into an outline for healing. I want you to know that children, subconsciously, and to their own detriment sometimes, internalize your behaviors as being their fault. They tell themselves that if Mom is sad today, it must be because I was on the phone past my curfew. If Dad is distant, it must be because I did something to irritate him. Do you follow me?”
“Yes,” Mercedes responded.
“Good.” He repositioned himself in his chair. “Now, I need to know what each of you sees as the biggest dysfunction in your household.”
“As parents or spouses?” Mercedes asked.
“Whichever is bigger.”
Mason answered. “I see the biggest dysfunction being that I have a high-profile job, exposing me to a high level of visibility and stress.”
The doctor took notes. “And how does that affect your wife?”
Mason crossed his leg over his knee. “I think it causes her to take up the slack when I’m not around and sometimes when I am around.”
“How do you think that makes her feel?”
“Surely she must feel pressured and weighed upon.”
“Would you agree, Mrs. Wilson?”
“Absolutely,” Mercedes replied looking pleased.
“How does it make you feel? You tell him yourself.”
“I agreed to take up the slack a long time ago. I knew it would be like this. But, once your young children get older and more aware as teenagers, sometimes their concerns are so serious and so real that the answers that used to work no longer do. And when that happens, my response is anger.”
“Anger at whom?”
“Anger at myself for not having the right answer, not having the ability to have my husband home more and have him at the PTA meetings, recitals and tournaments.”
“Would you say you’re angry at your husband, though?”
“At times,” Mercedes admitted, looking at Mason as though she awaited a reaction.
Dr. Little asked, “What would cure that anger?”
“More focused quality time with me and the kids. It’s just that simple.”
Mason countered, “But it’s not that simple, doctor. I have obligations and demands that I have to work in between family time.”
Mercedes replied, “Sometimes I think you work us in, in between work time.”
“Wow. Did you hear what she just said?”
“Yes, but—”
Dr. Little interrupted, sensing a denial coming. “Now, with all due respect, I asked did you hear what she said? That is her opinion and not hearing her invalidates her. Did you hear her?”
“I did.”
“What did she say?”
“She said it feels like I fit the family in between my career, as if they’re second.”
“Is that right, Mrs. Wilson?”
“Yes.”
“Mr. Wilson, what do you think about that?”
“I can see how that would be her opinion. And I apologize. It’s truly not my intention and I didn’t know that she felt that way. It makes me feel bad because of course my family comes first. I work for my family so that I can provide for my family.”
Mercedes interjected. “And he’s done that. A darn good job of it, too. But to nurture relationships takes true, dedicated, devoted, focused time.”
“And time is something I don’t have enough of”
Dr. Little looked content. “So, I can see that we’re getting somewhere. We’ll work on that. But now, Mrs. Wilson, what do you see as the biggest dysfunction in your family?”
“Probably that we live this rich lifestyle with the Lynx meetings, golf club memberships, magazine covers, jumbo accounts and fancy cars and homes. Yet behind closed doors, I see two unhappy kids and a so-so-marriage. As a wife, I think I overcompensate the emptiness with food, shopping, and even with sex.”
“Oh really?” Mason asked, looking extremely surprised.
“Yes, even though the sex has never been a problem.”
Mason remarked snidely, “Okay, so we’re in sync on something.”
“But also, we’ve been caregivers for my ailing mother-in-law who I love dearly. We take care of her a little less now that Claude, Mason’s brother, has taken her in. But with jobs and responsibilities, I’d almost give anything to have my husband with a normal job, as ungrateful as that may sound. Some women would think I’m nuts for saying that.”
“Do you agree, Mr. Wilson?”
Mason crossed his legs in the other direction. “Agree that we have a so-so marriage? No. But, damn, I’m starting to feel guilty for being successful. This life we live is anything but so-so. If I wasn’t a professional golfer, Mercedes wouldn’t overeat, the kids would be happier and my mom would be healthy. I can’t take the blame for everyone’s problems.”
“Now, do you really believe that?” the doctor asked.
“It’s like if I had a normal job this family would be normal. It’s not that simple. I know plenty of people who work nine-to-five and have more problems than we do. Abnormal schedules should not equate with abnormal family members.”
“You’re right, Mr. Wilson, but everything in moderation.” Dr. Little looked at Mercedes. “Do you see how he feels?”
“Yes,” she replied, smiling at Mason.
“What did he say?”
“He said that he feels to blame and that even a different job would not be a quick fix.”
“Is that close?” he asked Mason.
“She gets it.” Mason kept his eyes fixed upon the doctor.
“Okay, now. Let’s me explain this. Dysfunction is normal and is also very common. It’s not the level of the issues that makes a family less dysfunctional, it’s how you handle the crises that matters. Since you’re here in the flesh, I think that’s evidence enough that you want to fix it. I can see that you want to learn how to deal with the issues. And so here we are. So far we know that time is a big issue and relieving pressure from Mrs. Wilson by having quality interactions with all family members in a balanced way should help. The diet and anger could possibly be relieved once the relationships start to gel. It sounds like emotions are at the root, not the food itself.
“And from the teens’ point of view—Rashaad seems well adjusted. He’s just growing into young adulthood. And Mr. Wilson, you’re walking in the very shoes he’s going to fill. Remember that. As far as Star is concerned, I think she’s borderline genius. I know you know that. I think you should get her tested.”
Mercedes nodded her head in agreement. “Yes, we’re very aware of that. She always scores off the charts on placement tests.”
“Well, she’s definitely an old soul, I’ll say that much. Now dealing with Rashaad’s issues, even though they’re minor, will be our topic in two weeks. And Mr. Wilson, I want you to make a focused commitment to be here every Wednesday for the next six weeks like clockwork. Is that a deal?”
“Yes.”
“So next week we’ll deal with Star and her conflict about the attention that being famous draws. She wants and needs to be individual. She looks forward to a future of anonymity. Then we’ll talk about how Mrs. Wilson’s needs can be met. And the fourth week we’ll discuss how Mr. Wilson can give more time to the family.”
Mason remarked, “Shoot, I’ll just retire from the circuit and we can save ourselves six weeks of psychotherapy.”
“Mason has really been trying,” Mercedes said, placing her hand on his back.
Dr. Little leaned forward toward Mason, who looked up with a blank stare. “No, no one is saying that, Mr. Wilson. There is room in between the passive and the aggressive choices. That would be overly aggressive and much too impulsive. The fifth week we’ll talk about caregiving and the future over the next five years as parents. The sixth week we’ll bring in all four of you to tie things together. Allow twice as much time that eve
ning. Are we clear on our goals and outlook?”
“We are,” Mercedes answered. “What can we do in the meantime?”
“Work on being there for each other—both of you, with a hug, a smile, a phone call, an e-mail, a wink, a surprise, a touch. Just show some kind of attention. Focus on what really matters in life—lover
“It sounds like we have our work cut out for us,” Mason replied in a low tone.
“Yes, you do. Both of you do. And it goes deeper than what can be covered in a few sessions. It’s a lifestyle change and a life commitment. And one can’t do it alone.”
Mason responded after Mercedes and the doctor gave him a look, as if awaiting a reply. “Don’t look at me.”
“You have to be there mind and spirit, willing to do the work.”
“I’m willing,” Mercedes said.
Mason agreed, coming to his feet as if he wanted it to be over. “So am I.”
The doctor and Mercedes stood as well. “Okay then, I’ll see you both next week. Oh, one more thing. Your homework is to recall a pivotal moment in your life that changed you forever. I want it in writing so that it takes up at least one complete page. And I want you to read it aloud next week.”
“A moment about each other?” Mercedes asked.
“Whatever moment you want it to be.”
She shook the doctor’s hand. “Got it, Dr. Little. Thanks so much.”
“Call me in the meantime if you need me. Good luck.” He handed them both his business card.
Mason nodded his head and led the way out.
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