She wasn't so stupid that she missed the undercurrents running between Mica and a couple of the other locals about his age. She figured they were old school mates, but if she questioned him, he shut down, saying it wasn't worth the wasted breath to talk about it.
A knock on the door had her tensing. Even though they knew Lorenzo was firmly planted in New York and as far as they could tell no one had tagged them yet, she still wasn't able to completely relax. Rounding the last turn to the living room, she peeked through the screen door and found Steffi with a plate of brownies in hand. She smiled as she let the woman she'd become so fond of in.
"I'm not disturbing you, am I, sugar?"
Jayden signed that she was happy to see her and she'd just been lying down.
Upset stomach.
Steffi smiled awkwardly and turned for the small kitchen.
"Honey, it's none of my business, of course, but you've been feeling sick for more than a month now.” She set the plate on the counter then turned and placed her hands on Jayden's shoulders. “Now, I don't mean to be indelicate, but is it possible that you're pregnant?"
The blood drained from Jayden's head so fast she had to sit down to stem another dizzy spell. Sinking her butt onto the closest chair, morning sunlight bathed her face as she noticed the scent of basil from a potted herb plant by the patio door. Her stomach took another turn.
Pregnant?
She placed a protective hand over her belly before signing, There's no way.
Jayden couldn't remember the last time she'd even had a cycle. The doctors had told her it was stress. It wasn't like she was under less stress now, not with Mica and his whole family at risk because of her. Not with falling in love for the first time in her life and not knowing how it would work out in the end. Not with Mica and Zane at each other's throats day in and day out.
Pregnant?
Impossible.
Steffi sat beside her, a gentle hand placed on her thigh, her soft voice full of concern. “Sugar, no birth control is foolproof. If it were, this world wouldn't be so full of fools."
A tear slipped over her cheek in spite of Steffi's attempt at levity.
A baby.
It was a dream she'd forced herself to give up at fifteen, because she would never let a child anywhere near Lorenzo. Never give him that much power over her. She'd never felt her own safety and welfare valuable enough to be the submissive little wife Lorenzo constantly tried to force her to be. But for a child's safety, God, she'd be his prisoner in full.
The thought had her making another run for the bathroom. When she came out, Steffi was waiting for her with a glass of juice and a cool cloth.
"Why don't you lay down for a bit? You'll feel better."
Jayden sat on the bed and sipped the juice slowly while Steffi ran the cloth over her forehead and cheeks in a very motherly fashion. “Are you sick all day, sugar, or is it just in the mornings?"
Jayden didn't answer, only stared at her.
"Are you more tired than usual? Peculiar appetite? Are your breasts more sensitive?"
Jayden heard the words almost as if she were outside her own body. It was very much like the moment she realized she could no longer give voice to her thoughts. It was frustrating and scary and very, very unreal. She pressed her hand into her stomach again. She'd experienced all those things and though she hadn't eaten much recently, her clothes didn't fit her quite the same anymore.
Curled up on the bed, her mind raced with anxious fury through all the ways this would complicate both hers and Mica's life. Hell, she didn't even know if he liked kids. She thought of how bad the timing was, and shook when she thought of Lorenzo getting his hands on her while she was still pregnant. She wondered, If it is true, will Mica freak out?
She had no idea how he felt about children. God, what if he thought she'd lied to him when she told him she couldn't get pregnant?
She moaned, feeling sick again, only this time she knew it had nothing to do with ... her baby.
Sitting back up she signed the word “T-e-s-t” in individual letters. Thank God Steffi seemed to know what she meant, because Jayden didn't have the wherewithal to communicate any better than that. With a soft smile and another gentle touch, Steffi agreed to get a test from the store for her. After she left, Jayden's head continued to spin. If she was pregnant, it would be the greatest news and the worst news of all time. It would be a miracle, and a nightmare.
Clutching her stomach, she curled into a ball, trying to calm herself with deep even breaths.
It will be all right.
Her mantra of the past three and a half months. Somehow, it would be all right.
* * * *
Mica and Zane again paced the perimeter of the woods that surrounded his parents’ place. It was their daily ritual. Zane had assigned several teams of men to watch the property, there was a full security system in place now, but Mica went crazy if he didn't feel a part of actively protecting what was his. That he had to do this with Zane was testing every last patience cell his body had but for Jayden, he'd go through hell if necessary.
And this is pretty damn close to hell.
"It won't be much longer, mate."
Mica half-groaned a response. The less time he spent conversing with the Brit, the happier he was. He clomped through the tall weeds, his mind intent on getting back to Jayden. The stress had started to take a toll on her. He saw it in the dark circles under her eyes, the way her stomach had gone sour, and he felt it when he loved her at night. Though her body was as responsive as ever, more so at times, there were nights when she loved him like the world was coming to an end. Though he appreciated her enthusiasm, he knew she was only like that when she feared it would end.
He was tired of waiting for the slow wheels of justice to turn and needed put a plan of his own in action. If there were no results in the next week, he'd take the guns he'd been purchasing and finish the job himself. He knew full well he'd either end up dead or imprisoned, but as long as he took the bastard with him, he didn't care.
Jayden was all he cared about. He was concerned about her health and, while he knew his plan was far from perfect and would devastate her, he'd already spoken to his dad. His parents would look after her, keep her safe. In time she'd heal, and at least she'd be free. He'd sacrifice his own freedom for hers in a heartbeat.
Over the time they'd been together, they'd shared so much. She'd told him about growing up, about the night she was told she had to go live with Lloyd, and the night she was forced to marry him. She'd been twenty and had been held in his house for five years at that point. Until that night, she'd believed somehow she would get out. The marriage ceremony had killed those hopes, but it hadn't killed her spirit.
Mica still marveled over that. She was so strong and brave, and the best thing that had ever happened to him. Through her stories and this forced sabbatical home, he'd been forced to deal with his own memories of growing up poor. Memories of Liz Barret who he had thought he loved, but had screwed Lance Douglas behind his back because the Douglas family had money. She wasn't about to hook up permanently with a no-account with no future.
That had hurt so bad it shaped who he became over the next ten years or so. But now Jayden was his life. The night of the fireman's barbeque he'd seen Liz and Lance and their four kids. He'd felt nothing but a slight bitterness that he'd been made a fool of. The old Garth Brooks tune his mother loved came back to him. Thank God For Unanswered Prayers.
He laughed to himself and half-hid the smile behind his hand. Loving that woman had changed him but good. Un-fucking believable.
He had no qualms about the sacrifice he was about to make for Jayden. None at all.
Zane went to speak to a couple of guys in a Ford pickup, one of the biggest trucks Mica had ever seen. He didn't like that Zane kept him out of the loop. He was as much a part of all this as anyone, but he knew it was a simple pissing game, and Mica refused to play it with him.
* * * *
"Is everything se
t, then?” Zane leaned on the side of the truck watching Tommy Steele scan the area. Occupational habit; Zane did it in his sleep.
"It's set. And if it doesn't work this time?"
Zane's gut knotted. He knew if Lloyd got Jayden back, she wouldn't have another chance. “It has to."
"But if it doesn't?"
Zane almost laughed. The words were so like ones he'd spoken so many times. Blunt, to the point, and hell yes, he realized he might be losing his objectivity on this case. But Steele was young, an operative for only seven months. He was like a damn pit bull with a kitten, and his view never wavered from the point.
"Then I'm going after him myself. When this is over, one way or the other, Lloyd will be neutralized."
Steele snorted. “You and Devane have it so damn bad for that girl, neither of you are seeing straight."
Zane didn't like the comparison one bit. He didn't like that while he looked at Jayden with naked love in his eyes, she looked at him with nothing but friendship. Hated that when she looked at Devane, he practically smelled her getting wet.
But his love for her wasn't an issue, nor was hers for Devane. This was a job, and he was still capable of detachment. He was a trained agent for Christ's sake, and he'd do his job.
"Devane's becoming a problem with all those goddamn firearms. I want two guys on him every second of the day and night. The last thing we need is some love-crazed idiot to go off half-cocked and bugger everything we've spent years building."
Steele took out a pack of cigarettes, offered one to Zane, and lit up. As the tobacco sting hit his lungs, he felt a strange sense of calm ease into his body. He took another long drag. “Is the back-up plan in motion?"
He didn't like the back-up plan, not one bit, it was anti-climactic after all they'd been through, but having the old sod's bloody arse in prison was better than having him off scot free. Dead, however, was Zane's preference.
"It is."
Zane flicked away the rest of the cigarette and nodded as he stepped away from the truck. Steele climbed inside, and Zane headed back toward Devane, praying he'd make it through another night without closing his hands around the bloke's throat.
* * * *
Jayden couldn't feel her legs.
Pregnant?
How was it possible? Steffi had known her well. She'd brought back four tests instead of one, and Jayden had taken every one of them and every time she got an extra line, or a plus, or the word pregnant. It didn't seem they could all be wrong.
"Here, sugar, come sit down."
Steffi put a hand under Jayden's arm and led her to the settee under the bedroom window. She felt so strange. Her palms were sweaty, her forehead clammy, her legs shaky and her stomach...
Oh, God.
She didn't even want to think about her stomach. She searched Steffi's face. What am I going to do? She couldn't remember a single sign; she felt as mute as she had for the past three years.
Steffi crouched in front of her, placing her hands on Jayden's knees. “Sugar, it's a baby, not a bomb threat. It'll be fine."
Jayden sort of half laughed, half breathed. How could it be all right? She wasn't even sure she'd still be living by summer's end.
"What's wrong?"
Jayden jerked her head up to meet Mica's apprehensive gaze. Though he tried to mask it, she'd learned to read him too well.
"Nothing, sweetheart.” Steffi stood up, her usual charming exterior in place. “Jayden still doesn't feel well, but she'll be fine."
Mica moved his gaze from his mother to Jayden. He could see they were keeping something from him. Granted, he was so tense these days he was readying himself for the inevitable snap, but he could still be counted on, they didn't need to hide things.
His mother hugged him, and he felt her tears against his cheek. His spine went rigid.
"Jayden, what's wrong?” His voice was cold, detached, but these women were scaring the shit out of him. “Mama?"
He took her by the shoulders and set her away from him, then moved to Jayden who looked as if she were in a state of shock. He cupped her cheeks in his palm, tilting her head until she looked at him. “Honey, I don't care what it is, just tell me."
Tears running down her cheeks, she swallowed and closed her eyes. Mica's heart squeezed so tight he feared it might pop.
Without looking at him, she started to sign. He realized by the third sign she was just making letters. N. A. N. T. He shook his head. “What, angel? I missed the beginning. Again. Tell me again."
She didn't sign. She opened her eyes and looked at him in that deep, intense way she had. He felt her words coming through her eyes.
She reached up, put her hand over his heart, and pressed.
"Heart to heart, angel. Tell me."
She blinked slowly and mouthed two words. I'm Pregnant.
Mica went numb, then grabbed onto her as he sank to the floor while his head spun and his heart beat so fast he feared it would jump right through his rib cage. Pregnant? That meant baby. My baby.
"I screwed up. Fuck, angel, I'm so sorry.” He tipped his head against her shoulder. His mother's soft words, “I'll leave you guys alone for a while,” and the sound of the door closing behind her barely registered.
"I'm so sorry, angel. So sorry."
How long he rocked her in his arms he'd never know. They sat in silence, holding one another. His heart fought with his head. Jayden pregnant with his child was a dream. He wanted to swing her around, laugh and shout to the world how much he loved her and that they had a baby on the way, but their situation stole his happiness before it even incubated.
Jayden was in a very dangerous situation with a madman after her. Keeping her safe was taxing and precarious, now his child was at risk, too. This new information would push her. He wasn't sure what she might do, what lengths she'd go to keep their child safe.
"Angel, we need to talk about this.” He gently pushed her back and looked into eyes still distant and hazed with shock. He brushed her hair away from her face, kissed her forehead. “I'll keep you both safe. You know that, right? This doesn't change things for me."
She looked at him as if she'd never seen him before, and he felt fear shimmy up his spine. Climbing from the floor, he brought her into his arms.
"Jayden, do you hate kids?"
She shook her head emphatically, but the sadness in her eyes didn't lift.
"Is it that you're afraid of Lloyd? Or is it because you don't want to have my baby?"
She huffed her breath in an obvious show of frustration and pushed him away from her. When she turned back, the signs came too fast for him. He grabbed her hands to stop her, placing his hand to her heart. He always did better when he simply looked into her eyes.
"I want this baby.” He waited for her to absorb that. “Jayden, I love you. Our situation is fucked up big time.” He laughed at the understatement then hurried on. “But we'll get through it. You, me...” He placed a hand over his baby tucked away safely inside its mother. “...and our baby."
"Jayden!"
"Fuck off, Clouseau.” He groaned almost under his breath, but Jayden was already headed for the door, probably thrilled for the distraction. He tried to ignore the fact that she hadn't even acknowledge his declaration of love. It wasn't like he'd wanted to tell her like this, but the moment seemed to call for it. Yet, what had been a lifetime event for him didn't even seem to register on her.
He bit the inside of his cheek as Zane entered the room and spun Jayden in his arms.
At least it won't be much longer before good old Zane gets aboard a jet headed back for the good old UK.
Ok, now. Breathe, buddy. Just breathe.
"They've convened the grand jury, sweetheart. We're going to get that fucking rat bastard. Once and for all."
The words elated him, but the sight of his woman in Zane's arms didn't. The fact that she hung on him like he was the answer to her every question made Mica want to try out one of his new guns. He struggled for calm and slowly groun
d out, “What happens next?"
Zane looked at him like he hadn't even known he was there. Mica resisted the urge to put his fist down the cockney bastard's throat.
"By this time next week it could be all over. Jayden will officially go into protective custody until after the trial...” He laughed and tipped Jayden's chin with his fingers. Mica's hand's flinched with desire to strike. “.... but then it'll be over."
"She won't still be at risk afterwards? He won't be able to reach out from behind bars?"
Zane exhaled as if the energy to explain wasn't worth his effort and turned toward Mica. “For a time, yes, she may be. But I will not leave until I'm certain she's one hundred percent safe. His power will diminish exponentially the longer he's behind bars. Someone new will move in to pick up his territory and the game for us starts all over again, but the new bloke won't be a threat to Jayden."
Mica still couldn't find the ability to take a deep breath. He didn't trust Zane, and he didn't trust Lloyd. He looked at Jayden. She was glowing, and he realized it was probably because she carried his child. A child he might never know if things didn't work out as neatly as secret agent boy thought they might.
He walked over and stole her from Zane's arms, wrapping her in his own. Resting his cheek on the top of her head he said on a breath, “It's almost over."
One way or the other.
* * * *
Mica pulled up the drive in front of the guesthouse behind his parents', the home he'd been sharing with Jayden for almost four months. An uneasy feeling swept through him. The maroon Lexus parked out front wasn't one he knew, but the guards were constantly switching vehicles. Still, he started toward the house, his steps hastening the closer he got to the front door.
As he reached for the knob, he heard the unmistakable sound of Jayden crying. He pulled the door so hard he wouldn't have been surprised if it came off its hinges into his hand. “Jayden!” He followed the sounds of her sobs down the hall. Just as he made it to their bedroom, she came out with such force she slammed into him.
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