by Sky Corgan
There are fireworks going off across the city now. I wish Willow could see it. I wish we were standing here together. That's how it should be.
“Hey,” a masculine voice says behind me.
I turn to see Peter, and my guilt doubles.
“Hey. When did you get back?”
“Just now.” He leans against the railing next to me to watch the fireworks. “Where's Willow?”
“She drank too much. She's passed out in the guest bedroom.” I nod back towards the guest bedroom.
“Sorry I got back so late. There was a lot of shit to deal with.” He tears his fingers through his hair, and I can see the lingering stress on his face. “Thanks for taking care of things here.”
“Yeah. No problem,” I mutter before pushing myself away from the balcony. I need to get the fuck out of here. Just being here is starting to drive me crazy. “I'm going to take off. I was just waiting around for you to get back.”
“Oh. Alright.” He seems a bit startled but not disappointed that I'm leaving. He doesn't need me here anyway when he has so many other people to entertain.
“Have a good rest of your night.” I pat him on the shoulder before heading back through the loft to leave. I don't even say goodbye to anyone else. All that matters is getting out of here and sleeping off everything that happened tonight.
Peter
I can't believe what I'm seeing. This is not what I had thought I'd come home to.
Naturally, after going through something as traumatic as the breaking in of my company, all I wanted was to come home and be comforted by my girlfriend. One of the reasons why I like Willow so much is because she's such a nurturing person. I had imagined throwing back shots with my best friend and talking and laughing with everyone else at the party until I temporarily forgot all of my woes.
Instead, I got this.
As soon as I walked through the door, I looked around for Willow. When one of my friends told me that she was in the guest bedroom, I didn't think anything of it. Caleb wasn't around, so I figured he had left. Fuck, even if people would have told me they were in the guest bedroom together, I wouldn't have thought anything of it. Caleb isn't that type of guy. He would never go after someone else's girlfriend.
At least, that's what I had thought until I saw him kissing my girlfriend.
When I rounded the corner, the sight before me stopped me dead in my tracks. There Willow was, passed out on the bed...and Caleb was leaning over her.
It takes me a moment to realize what's happening, but as soon as I do, all of the color drains from my face.
I could barge in and cause a scene. I could kick his ass, but I don't really understand the circumstances. So I take the more honorable approach. I detour to the bathroom and call him from my phone. Doing that will break him from the kiss and hopefully fill him with enough guilt to make him leave. I know the guy pretty well. He's not a heartless bastard.
My plan works. Within seconds, Caleb has left the guest bedroom and made his way to the balcony. I follow him there to see what his reaction will be to my presence. It's obvious that he's shaken. Shaken...and wasted.
It's incredibly rare that I've seen Caleb this drunk. His eyes are glassy. He's swaying slightly.
Despite the pain in my chest from his betrayal, I decide to forgive him. He never would have done this if he were sober. But I also can't dismiss the fact that he has feelings for my girlfriend. Well, probably has feelings. Who knows what was going through his head when he was kissing her? Maybe it's just been a while and...Oh hell, I don't know.
He leaves in haste shortly after I approach him, and I go on to entertain my party guests for the rest of the night, though the memory of that kiss haunts me. Willow never would have allowed it. She's not to blame for this. All I can do is pretend that it didn't happen and hope that things return to normal once the party is over and everyone sobers up.
I kick everyone out at around 2 AM. Then I retire to my bedroom, leaving Willow to rest in the guest bedroom. I had thought to move her into my bed, but I don't want to disturb her.
The night is sleepless. Though I try not to put much thought into it, I'm still questioning why Caleb kissed Willow. They are awfully close, but I've never gotten the impression that he has any interest in her. It's a mystery to me, and it will remain that way because I refuse to bring it up to him. Maybe he would deny it. Maybe he wouldn't even remember it. I just don't want to bother with the confrontation.
Since I can't sleep, I get up early to make Willow some hangover soup. Considering that Caleb thought to put a wastebasket next to her, I can only assume that she tied one on, too.
“Caleb.” I hear her call out at 7 AM.
It stings that she's in my house, yet she's calling for him. Does she even remember where she is?
“Caleb. Where are you?”
I stare down at the soup. Every time she says his name, it's like a stab to my heart. Maybe this is what it feels like to truly like someone. It's certainly...different.
“Caleb. I need some water. I think I'm dying.”
I chuckle at that last part.
I pour Willow a glass of water before heading to the guest bedroom. She's propped up on one elbow, her hair a mess, her eyes slits from sleepiness. The second she sees me, she gasps and pulls the covers up over her head.
“I brought you water.” I set the glass on the bedside table.
“Oh my God, I look horrible. You shouldn't have to see me like this.”
“It's fine.” I try to peel the covers off of her. “It's not like I've never seen you hungover before.”
She hides her face behind her hands once I've finally unveiled her. “Don't look.”
“You look fine.” I pick the glass of water up and offer it to her.
She takes it with both hands and gulps the entire contents of the glass down before handing it back to me. “Thank you.”
“Would you like some more?”
“Yes, please.” She nods.
When I return with the second glass of water, Willow is sitting on the side of the bed, though she still looks every bit as miserable as she did before.
“I feel like my head is going to explode.”
When I offer her the water this time, she waves it away.
“Did Caleb stay the night?” she asks.
The fact that she's still inquiring about him makes me uncomfortable. Shouldn't she be more concerned about me and what happened to my business?
“No. He took off shortly after I got back last night,” I inform her.
Willow looks up at me finally, her eyes full of sympathy. “What happened at Advanced Data Solutions? Is everything okay?”
“Thankfully, the vandals didn't do much structural damage. Harris is going to work on getting more computers in there so that everyone can get back to work on Tuesday. There's not much that can be done today, but tomorrow I'll have to work all day to make sure that everything is up and running. We're going to hire an overnight guard so that hopefully this shit doesn't happen again.”
“That's probably a good idea.” She reaches over to grab the glass of water, though she sips it more gingerly this time.
“How much did you drink last night?” I think about the empty bottle of Asombroso.
“Too much.” Willow holds her head. “I'm mad at Caleb.”
“Why? What did he do?” Alarm fills me.
“He shouldn't have driven home drunk. The idiot could have gotten himself killed.” She scowls. “I need to text him to make sure he's alright.”
Willow glances around for her purse. I put it in my bedroom for safe keeping once I got home and found it on the kitchen counter. I refuse to go retrieve it just so she can text Caleb.
“Your purse is in my bedroom,” I tell her when I see her trying to get up.
She pauses, sitting back down and slumping over. “Oh,” Willow groans. “Moving hurts. I'll text him later.”
“You should rest.” I stroke her hair gently.
“Y
eah. I feel like I could sleep for days.” Willow lays back down, shimmying under the covers.
I stand to take my leave. “Whenever you're ready to get up, I made you some hangover soup.”
“Hangover soup?” she parrots.
“It's an Indian recipe that one of my friends taught me. It really does help.”
She smiles at me. “You're such a good boyfriend. I'm so lucky to have you.” Willow wiggles happily, taking some of my worries away.
I have to remember that she was asleep when Caleb kissed her. She doesn't even know it happened, and I'm not about to tell her. Still, I can't help but get the feeling that there's more going on between them than meets the eyes.
At first, I liked that they were close. Now I'm not so sure it's a good thing.
No sooner than Willow is able to get up, she asks me for her phone so that she can text Caleb. When he doesn't respond after several minutes, she calls him. Her overbearing concern doesn't make me feel any better about their close friendship.
“He's not answering.” She frowns.
“Maybe he's at work.”
I fix her a bowl of soup and sit with her at the dining room table while she eats. The level of jealousy I'm feeling isn't something I'm accustomed to. Usually, if a girl purposely tries to make me feel jealous, I just move on to the next. Girls are a dime a dozen for me. But I don't think that Willow is doing this on purpose. And I definitely feel more affection for her than I have for other girls who have pulled similar shit in the past. It's a conundrum, but it's eating me alive, and I need to do something about it so I don't go insane.
“Caleb is a good guy,” I start, not really sure how to segue into what I want to say without sounding like an asshole.
“He is.” Willow nods. “He always makes sure I'm taken care of.”
Like last night? I have to fight every muscle in my face not to roll my eyes.
“I think I'd like to spend less time with him and more time with you.” Wow, if that wasn't vague, I don't know what is.
She looks up at me, obviously confused. “Huh?”
I swallow hard, my gaze sweeping over the table as I search for words. “I think that when we go out on dates together, it should just be the two of us.”
“Oh. Well, that makes sense.” She continues eating, not fazed by my suggestion at all.
I'm glad. Because I have a feeling that the more I can keep them apart, the happier the two of us will be.
Caleb
The kiss is the first thing I think about when I open my eyes the next morning. It plays through my mind in slow motion with all of the regret I feel. Stupid alcohol. I never would have done that had I been sober. I wouldn't have been brave enough to do it.
Now I just feel like some desperate creeper.
My phone buzzes, and I pick it up off of my nightstand. It's a text from Willow asking if I got home alright. I set my phone back down and throw my arm over my face as I let out an exasperated sigh. I can't be bothered to text her back right now. How am I even going to face her again after what I did? Not that anyone knows. But I know. That's bad enough.
A few minutes later, my phone rings. Willow's name flashes across the called ID. For a split second, I worry that something might be wrong. But then I remember she's with Peter. And the text is a precursor to what the conversation will be if I answer the phone. That and her probably gushing about how wonderful Peter is...which I just can't handle right now.
I allow the call to go to voicemail and just lie there in my misery. The longer I stay in bed, the more I think about the kiss and why I did it. The entire night with Willow at my side plays through my brain over and over again. Saving her from that asshole in the kitchen. The excitement on her face when she brought out the game of Twister from Peter's room. Surely, she knew things would get awkward if we played. Or maybe she didn't. There's a childlike innocence about her that's endearing. She's not tainted like most people. But that will probably change after a month with Peter.
The thought of him changing her irrationally angers me. But there's nothing I can do about it. She chose to be with him. She wants this. I wish she wanted...
Fuck. I tear my hand through my hair. I cannot lie here all day and mope and think about what could have been.
Using all of my energy, I drag my lazy ass out of bed, walk Max and then go to the gym. Working out will distract me, plus it will help me burn through my hangover faster, not that I have much of one. I was admittedly drunk when I left Peter's loft last night, but thanks to my fast metabolism, I feel mostly okay now.
As soon as I walk inside the gym, I see Becky working out in the thirty-minute circuit area like I told her to. I can't help but grin, a bit surprised she's actually taking this seriously. She smiles at me when our eyes meet, but she doesn't leave the circuit to talk to me until her workout is done.
“Hey,” she chirps when she finds me at the pull-up bar.
“Hey.” I do my last rep before dropping down.
“Man, you're strong. I haven't done a pull-up since high school. I doubt I have the muscle to do them anymore.” She stares at the bar.
“Why don't you give it a try?” I step aside, gesturing to the equipment.
Her lips dip into a pout and she crosses her arms over her chest. “You're going to make fun of me if I can't do one.”
“I wouldn't dream of it.” I chuckle.
“You promise?” Becky hops, slowly giving in.
“I promise.” I move back so that she can get around me.
“Oh. Alright. If it will make you happy.” She stomps her feet like she doesn't want to do it, but she still reaches up to grip the bar. “I'm probably too sore to do it now.”
“I have faith in you.” I watch her make a halfhearted effort. Right before she's about to give up, I place my hands on her waist and lift her up. She gasps and giggles, looking back down at me. “See. I told you you could do it.”
“I guess I can when you help me.” She spins around in my arms once I set her down.
Our eyes meet, and I expect to feel something from it, but I don't. She's just another pretty girl in a sea of all the ones who have wanted my attention before.
“Caleb Ryan,” a shrill female voice says behind me. It makes me cringe and the hair on the back of my neck prickle. I turn to see Willow standing there with her arms crossed over her chest. I feel like I've been caught doing something wrong...but I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm single. I have just as much of a right to flirt as the next single guy. “Why haven't you been answering your phone?”
“I've been busy.” I take a defensive stance, standing in front of Becky. It's none of her damn business what I've been doing.
Her hard demeanor softens, and concern takes over her expression. “I've been worried sick about you. You can't do this shit to me. You left Peter's house drunk last night. I didn't know if you were dead in a ditch somewhere.”
Guilt assaults my chest...and something else. Thinking that I mean that much to her. It fills me with unpleasant forbidden yearnings.
I try to shake my sorrow away, but it's coming over me like a raincloud. “I'm fine. I was fine.”
“How am I supposed to know that when you don't answer your phone?”
“You shouldn't worry about me.”
“Yeah. Well, I do.” Willow places her hands on her hips.
“Did you come to workout?” Becky finally speaks. She sounds unnaturally happy for someone standing face to face with their enemy.
Willow looks her up and down with disdain and huffs.
“You should come do the circuit with me.” Becky points back to the circuit. “I just finished it, but I could go again if you want.”
“I just came to talk to him.” Willow nods to me. “Speaking of which, come outside. I need some advice.”
Before I have time to object, she grabs my hand and drags me out of the gym. I cast an apologetic look back at Becky who is standing there dumbstruck. I swear, Willow is like a whirlwind wherever she goes.
/>
As soon as we're outside, Willow folds her arms over her chest, looking nervous. “I think Peter is going to want to take things to the next level soon.”
Just hearing her say it makes my gut twist.
“I don't want to know what happens with you guys behind closed doors.” I pinch the bridge of my nose, trying to banish all of the horrid mental images going through my head right now.
“I mean, it's the natural progression of things.” She ignores me. “I've already spent the night at his house. I was too drunk for us to do anything, but since I've spent the night once, he's going to want me to spend the night again. It can only be a matter of time.”
“Don't care.” I pretend to plug my ears.
“Caleb.” She hops like a spoiled child to get my attention. “I don't know what I'm doing. I don't want to screw up or embarrass myself. In case you haven't figured it out yet,” she takes a step closer to whisper to me, “I'm a virgin.”
I think my heart stops beating. A new protectiveness takes over me, but I'm not sure if it's because I care about her as a friend or because I want to be her first.
“What? Do you want to fucking practice or something?” I throw the suggestion into the wind like I'm annoyed, but it's a completely serious question.
“No, I don't want to practice with you.” She seems appalled. “I just...don't know what to do is all. I'm nervous.” She shrinks back a little.
I'm feeling so many unpleasant things. I came here to escape thoughts of her, and yet here she is. Is there nowhere that I can find peace?
Whatever the case, I can't do this right now. I can't think of her being with him, especially with this new tidbit of information. I can't remember the longing looks we gave each other last night and imagine her in bed with another man. It's too painful.
“Read shit on the internet. This isn't my fucking problem,” I bark at her before heading back inside to the locker room. She can't follow me in there.
Peter
The Caleb thing continues to eat at me, especially when Willow told me that she was going to hunt him down as soon as she left my place. I know she wants to make sure he's alright, but still. Her tenacity is a bit alarming.