“I wouldn’t blame you if you’re angry with me for forcing your hand in coming here,” she said softly. “I know I could have made things much easier on you by not coming.”
“What makes you think I’m mad?” he asked.
She offered him a small smile. “We could start with that muscle that’s overworking itself in your jaw and the rigid set of your shoulders. Then there’s the fact that you’ve hardly spoken to me since we came in here.”
“I’m not mad.” His voice was clipped as he took off his blazer and then removed his gun and holster and set it on the top of the nightstand.
“You sound mad,” she replied.
He faced her, his eyes simmering with a fire that stole her breath away. “Lana, the only thing I’m feeling right now is the frustration of a man who wants you almost as much as he wants to draw his next breath. I can’t remember the last time I wanted a woman as badly as I want you, and right now I’m doing everything in my power to hang on to my self-control. In fact, I’m going to take a shower. A very cold shower.” He practically ran for the bathroom and closed the door with more force than necessary.
She stared at the closed door, a swell of heat rising up and sweeping over her entire body. He wanted her. He wanted her badly.
As she replayed his final words in her mind, a sweet shiver raced through her. She wanted him, too. She didn’t care that he wasn’t the man who would be with her at the end of her life. It was enough that he would be the man in bed with her in the morning.
Without giving herself a chance to change her mind, she unbelted her robe and pulled it off, then removed her nightgown. Wearing only a pair of panties, she pulled down the heavy gold bedspread on his bed and slipped in beneath the sheets.
She lay there and gave herself time to change her mind, to quickly jump back up and get into her own bed. But there wasn’t a doubt in her mind. She was exactly where she wanted to be.
When she heard the water stop running in the bathroom, a new shiver of anticipation whispered through her. She knew if she were going to change her mind, now was the time to do it, before he stepped out of the bathroom door.
Rather than jumping out of the bed, she snuggled deeper, feeling a crazy sense of rightness in this moment. She had no idea what tomorrow might bring, but tonight she was going to sleep in Riley’s arms.
The bathroom door opened and Riley stepped into the doorway and froze. Even though he was backlit by the bathroom light, she could not only see that he wore nothing but his jeans, but she could also see the wild glitter in his eyes.
“Lana, you’re in the wrong bed,” he said, his voice a husky whisper.
“I’m exactly where I want to be,” she replied.
He remained frozen for several long moments. “Are you sure?” he finally asked.
“I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life. Turn out the light and come to bed, Riley.”
The bathroom light winked off, leaving only the faint spill of illumination from the nightstand lamp, enough light for her to see the hunger that claimed his features as he pulled his wallet from his back pocket and laid it next to his gun on the nightstand.
She wanted to do it right. She wanted to be enough for him, at least for this night. There had been so many times in her life when she’d felt as if she hadn’t been enough.
Her heart beat so loud, so fast she wondered if he could hear it thundering in the room when he took off his jeans, leaving him only in a pair of navy briefs.
He slid beneath the sheets and she held her breath, waiting for him to reach out to her, to touch her. “Are you sure you know what you’re doing? I don’t want you to regret this in the morning.” His voice was strained and he remained perfectly still mere inches from her.
“I promise, no regrets,” she replied.
She assumed her words would spur him into immediate action, but instead he turned on his side to face her and reached out to stroke a strand of hair away from her face.
“I wasn’t expecting this,” he said in a soft whisper. “I wasn’t expecting you. But that first day when I walked into your home and got my first glimpse of you and saw that saucy sparkle in your eyes, I should have known that you were going to be trouble.” His hand lingered on her face, caressing her cheek with a tenderness that only increased her desire for him.
“This has been some crazy ride, hasn’t it?” she said, not surprised to find her voice slightly breathless at his touch.
“And it’s not over yet.” He leaned forward and claimed her lips with his.
His mouth tasted of heat and hunger, and as he touched the tip of his tongue to her lower lip she opened her mouth to allow the kiss to deepen.
He pulled her into his arms and gasped slightly, obviously surprised to find her almost naked in his arms. His skin was hot, almost fevered against her own as the kiss continued growing more hot and more wild with each passing minute.
As he embraced her and she felt the solidness of his chest and of his arms around her, she felt safe for the first time in a very long time.
There were so many things about being held by a man that she’d forgotten—the weight of warm hands on her skin, the tactile pleasure of his chest hair against her bare breasts and the faint rasp of his whiskers as he dragged his mouth slowly down her throat.
His hands stroked her back, as if fascinated by the feel of her skin, as his heart beat a rapid cadence against her own.
She trembled with pleasure as he shifted positions and his hand found one of her breasts. His cupped the fullness and then drew his fingers together to capture her nipple.
He raised his head and gazed down at her, the fire in his eyes igniting an answering heat in her. “You’re beautiful,” he said, his voice husky.
She wanted to protest, to tell him that she knew she wasn’t beautiful, but with his gaze so hot, so hungry on her, she felt more than beautiful.
Once again he claimed her lips with his and his craving for her was evident in the fiery, nearly out-of-control kiss. She gasped against his mouth, her desire rocketing higher than she could ever remember.
She slid her hands down his back, the play of his muscles exciting her. She’d only been with Joe. Her husband had been her first and only lover, and there was something wild and hot about being with a new lover—about being with Riley.
His hand left her breast, and as his mouth slid down her throat to capture her nipple, she tangled her hands in his hair. His tongue teased and raked over the sensitive tip, and sweet sensations rushed through her with each flick of his tongue. Moaning with pleasure, she moved her hips beneath him, wanting more of him, needing all of him.
He didn’t hesitate. He swept his hand down the flat of her stomach and then stopped as he encountered her panties.
“Take them off for me.” It was an urgent request she couldn’t refuse. As she reached down to take them off, he rolled away from her and took off his own briefs.
When they came together again his erection pressed against her thigh as his hand once again slid down the flat of her stomach.
But he didn’t caress her where she wanted most, where her need had her half mindless with desire. Instead his hand slid down her hip to her inner thigh.
Over and over again he came precariously close to touching her intimately only to stop short. Arching her hips each time, she thought he might be trying to drive her mad. The promise of ultimate pleasure denied with each caress he gave.
“Touch me,” she finally moaned, unable to stand it another minute.
He laughed, the sound both joyous and more than a little bit wicked. “Oh, trust me, Lana. I’m going to touch you. I want to brand you. I want to ruin you for any other man who might come after me.”
His words merely stoked her desire higher as a shiver of anticipation shuddered through her. Two could play at his game, she thought. She moved her hand down his stomach, a slow trail of heat, and she felt his muscles clench as she got closer to his hardness.
But instead of tou
ching him there, she slid her hand down his hip. He laughed again, the rumble of his amusement as much a turn-on as anything.
His laughter died on his lips and instead became a low groan when she finally grasped him. He pulsed in her palm and she slowly moved her hand up and then down.
“Okay, you win,” he said, the words a guttural groan.
She smiled at him through the haze of her desire. “Maybe I want to ruin you for any woman who comes after me.”
“Maybe you already have,” he replied, and then he touched her and just that quickly her orgasm crashed in on her. She cried out as she rode the waves of pleasure, and before she was finished he grabbed his wallet from the nightstand, pulled a condom package from it and tore it open.
He had it on in a second and moved over the top of her. She opened her legs to welcome him, wanting more of him.
He eased into her and closed his eyes, as if overwhelmed by her, by them together. He opened his eyes then, and in their green depths she saw not only raw, hot desire but also a vulnerability that threatened to steal the last of her breath away.
Then he moved, drawing back slightly and then plunging deep within her. She closed her eyes and grasped his butt, pulling him farther in, loving the way he filled her up.
His mouth found hers again in a desperate, frantic kiss as his hips rocked against hers with a masterful intensity.
Faster and faster they moved together until she could no longer think, could only feel Riley, inside her and around her.
Once again a tidal wave of sensation approached her and she cried out his name as it overtook her. She was vaguely aware of him stiffening against her as she shattered into a million pieces.
Afterward he rolled to his back and drew a deep breath. “That was amazing,” he finally said.
“Yes.” It was all she could utter as she waited for her heart to resume a more normal beat, as she waited for full breath to return to her.
It couldn’t possibly have been as amazing for him as it had been for her. She’d always thought Joe was a good lover, but he hadn’t even been in the same league as Riley. She now realized Joe had been a selfish lover, taking what he wanted with little thought to her needs. It was painful to admit that had been the story of their marriage.
“I’ll be right back.” Riley got up from the bed and padded into the bathroom.
She stared after him, exhausted and sated in a way she hadn’t been before in her life.
Don’t fall in love with him, a little voice whispered inside her head.
He had heartache written in his genes, she knew.
Eventually his bodyguard duty with her would be over and he’d be gone. She’d be a fool to allow her heart to get involved with him.
Thank God he’d had protection. She hadn’t even thought about it until he had pulled the condom out of his wallet. And of course he kept one in his wallet. A man like Riley would never know when an opportunity might present itself. And she was certain that for a man like Riley, it presented itself often.
He came out of the bathroom and turned out the nightstand lamp, then slid into bed and pulled her into his arms.
“I will guard your slamming-hot body with my life,” he said.
She smiled in the darkness of the room. “You’re just saying that now because you’ve had your way with me.”
“And what a way it was,” he said and planted a soft kiss on her forehead.
Despite her desire not to become emotionally involved with him, she couldn’t help the way her heart swelled in her chest.
He stroked her hair and released a deep sigh. “The day I found my mother dead on the floor in our kitchen was the day I made a conscious decision that I was never going to care about anyone again. You got in under my defenses, Lana. You and Haley made me care again.”
It was easy to talk about caring for a naked woman you held in your arms after making love to her, she thought. “You shouldn’t have made that decision when you did,” she replied. “It’s like the killer not only murdered your mother, but also murdered you. You have to have the capacity to care. That’s what makes us human.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” he replied, but something in his tone of voice made her believe she hadn’t responded to him in the way he’d wanted.
“Good night, Riley,” she said.
“Good night, Lana,” he replied, but didn’t loosen his hold on her.
Snuggled against him, she had the feeling she was safe from any danger the world might hold. But she knew it was an illusion. There was only so much a man could do against an unknown assailant.
And if that wasn’t enough to worry about, she had to hang on to her heart where Riley Kincaid was concerned. She’d given her heart to Joe and had tried to be all that he wanted, all that he needed. But she’d never been enough. There had always been other women, and with each of Joe’s promises to be faithful, she’d eventually lost her love for him. If he hadn’t died they would have been divorced.
Riley was far too much like the man she had married, the man who had destroyed her vision of a fairy tale ending. She absolutely, positively refused to make the same mistake twice.
Chapter Ten
Riley looked at his watch and breathed a sigh of relief. Two more hours and they could pack up for good and head home.
The day before had been a nightmare. It seemed as if everyone in the Kansas City area had decided to spend their Saturday at the jewelry show. By the time the day had ended Riley had been beyond exhausted and Lana had been euphoric about the number of sales she’d made.
He now stood next to her, keeping vigil as she showed a necklace to an older woman. He’d thought that after making love to her Friday night she would be out of his system. It had always worked that way for him. He wanted a woman until he had her, and then the hunger was gone.
With Lana it was different. Making love to her had only whetted his appetite and made him hungry for more.
They had made love again last night, and it had been as wonderful as the first time. Even now as he watched her smile at her customer, as he noticed the way her blond hair fell in a soft wave against her cheek, he wanted her again.
But she’d been unusually quiet this morning as they’d shared breakfast, and he wondered if regrets were already forming in her heart.
She made the sale and then Riley followed her to the pair of chairs and sat. “It’s been a lot slower today than it was yesterday,” he said.
She nodded. “Sundays are always slow days.”
“Have you always designed jewelry?”
“No. I graduated from college with a business degree and then didn’t know for sure what I wanted to do with it. I got a job in a jewelry store and it was there that I found my passion. It was also where I was working when I met Joe.”
She stared off into the distance, as if her mind was taking her back in time. “The first thing Joe wanted me to do when we got married was quit working. That’s when I really began to get serious about making jewelry and designing a line of my own.”
“So he was supportive of you.”
She turned and looked at Riley and there was a hint of wry amusement in her eyes. “Joe wouldn’t have cared if I made paper airplanes as long as it was something I could do at home. Joe supported me in anything that fit into the world he wanted. He liked the idea of a stay-at-home wife, you know, the little lady who could have his meals ready when he got home from work, the one who made sure his uniform was pressed just right and the house was clean.”
“That’s pretty rare in this day and age,” Riley replied.
“So you aren’t the kind of man who would like a woman at home whose sole job is caring for your every need?” she asked.
He grinned. “In theory it’s every man’s fantasy, isn’t it? But in reality I would want my wife to be whatever fulfilled her as a person. Making paper airplanes or jewelry or flying a plane—whatever made her happy and successful in her own right.”
Once again she looked away from
him, but not before he saw the shadow of grief darkening her eyes. He was surprised to realize it depressed him just a little. How long could a woman grieve for a dead man? How long before she would be emotionally ready to go on with her life?
Lana needed a man to love and Haley needed a father, but over and over again she sent him signals that she wasn’t ready to move on.
Of course, who was he to question the duration of her grief? He was thirty-three years old and still grieved the loss of his mother when he’d been fifteen years old.
He knew more than anyone that the ability to move on couldn’t be forced. He’d had plenty of women over the years who would have loved to force him into caring, into love, but he hadn’t been ready or willing—until now. And now that he’d found a woman he wanted, that somehow he thought he might need, she wasn’t in a position to accept what he might have to offer her.
He fought back a heavy sigh, wondering how he’d transformed from a selfish bastard who didn’t care about anyone to a lovesick man who was probably destined to get his heart broken.
Drawing a deep breath, he froze as he saw a familiar face in the crowd of people. Seth Black was headed their way, a friendly smile not quite reaching his dark eyes.
As Lana stood to greet the potential customer, Riley also got up and smoothly stepped in front of her. “Seth, right?” he said as the big man stepped up to the booth.
“That’s right, and you’re Riley. Greg told me his neighbor was selling jewelry down here this week end and I’m always looking for something special for my wife. In fact, our anniversary is coming up, so I thought I’d stop in here and see if I could find something for her.”
Lana started to step around Riley, but he held her back. There was no way he wanted her anywhere near this man who was a friend of Greg’s. “This is my wife, Lana. She’s the creative force, but if you want to buy something, I’m the business end of the operation,” Riley said. “Seth was one of the men I played basketball with at Greg’s,” he told Lana.
“Oh, that’s nice.” She smiled at Seth, but at the same time placed a hand on Riley’s back, as if to assure him that she understood his caution.
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