by Nann Dunne
"Laramie and some of the forts around here have schools, and there's talk of a high school in Cheyenne." Rusty cocked her head. "You never say 'ain't' like Mel and me do. And you write. I can't even read much, just some signs mostly and stuff in the stores."
Sarah's interest was piqued. "Would you want to learn? I could teach you."
"Would you? Oh, please. I see other people reading newspapers, and I have to ask them what's going on. I want to be able to read the news by myself. Maybe even some books."
Sarah smiled at her. "We can do that."
The joy in Rusty's face dimmed. "But we don't have no books. Not even newspapers."
Sarah pursed her lips and tapped them with a forefinger. "I have an idea. I have plenty of notepaper with me. You can tell me the story of your life from as far back as you remember, and I'll write it down. That way I can teach you from your own words."
"Wonderful. I'll work hard and be the best student you ever had."
No, Sarah thought, that title belongs to Leah. But she'd teach Rusty as much as she could.
"I've seen you drawing, too. Will you show me some?"
"I'd be happy to." Sarah rose to retrieve her sketchbook from a saddlebag hanging with the coats and hats near the door.
"Wait," Rusty said, "let me put the butter and clabber away first. The clabber tastes better when it's cold." Sarah detoured to lift the trapdoor for her and take the clabber pitcher from her. She and Rusty took the two items into the cellar and returned. While Sarah went to get the sketchbook, Rusty closed the door and set the rug back over it.
They sat at the table. Sarah pulled her spectacles case from her pocket and put them on. She opened the sketchbook and placed it in front of Rusty.
"Oh, my," Rusty said, "these are so good. They look real." She slowly leafed through it.
"Ah," she said and pointed to a picture, "that's got to be Faith."
Just looking at the picture brought a lump to Sarah's throat. Unable to speak, she nodded.
"No wonder you won't cheat on her. She's a fine looking woman." Rusty turned a page and let out a little squeal. "And here's Benjamin! What a charmer he is. Fourteen's a fun age for boys. I remember Mel when he was fourteen." She laughed. "We lived in town, and he about drove my pa crazy, always running around, hanging with the wrong kids, throwing crabapples on neighbors' porches at night."
"Benjamin hasn't done that yet, but we don't live that close to the center of town, more on the outskirts." It was hard to imagine Benjamin being wild. It was hard to imagine Mel being wild either. He certainly outgrew it.
Rusty echoed her thoughts. "Mel's such a good man now, I can hardly believe how he carried on."
And he had a father, Sarah thought. Benjamin seemed to be doing very well without one.
Chapter Ten
With some trepidation, Faith knocked on the door of her former home. Leah answered the door, with, as Faith noted, the barest hint of a flinch.
"Faith." Leah's tone was noncommittal. "Come in, please." She led Faith into the living room.
Faith looked around. "You haven't changed anything?"
"And we haven't sold our house in town. Phillip and I decided to leave this house as it is until Sarah comes home. She made her decision in a hurry, and she was upset at the time. We want to give her a chance to change her mind."
"That's very kind of you."
"Sit down, please. I'll bring some refreshments." Faith sat in a chair, and Leah went into the kitchen. In a few minutes, she returned with a tray that held a tea set and cookies.
"You and Sarah gave us this tea set for our wedding." Leah set the tray on the small table in front of the sofa and sat down.
"I recall that. Sarah said pink and white roses are your favorite." Of course, Faith thought. Her bedroom here had pink and white roses in the wallpaper.
"They are. I was pleased that she remembered. You take sugar in your tea, right?"
"Yes, please."
Faith accepted the cup of tea Leah handed her. She took a sip and replaced the flowered cup in its matching saucer. She hesitated.
"I haven't heard from Sarah for more than three months. She was writing me every so often, but her last letter was in December, around Christmas. Have you heard from her?"
Faith felt uncomfortable asking Leah for information about Sarah. Truth be told, she had always been a little jealous of their close relationship. But she had nowhere else to turn.
"No, we haven't heard anything, either. I've been worried about her. Hearing that you haven't had word from her makes me worry more." Leah's expression reflected her sincerity.
"Maybe the winter weather has something to do with it," Faith said. "Maybe she's somewhere that she can't mail her letters."
"I hope that's so. None of us knows where to reach her to even inquire." Leah drank some of her tea.
"Or answer her letters." Faith twisted her fingers together. "I hate the thought that she might be sick. Or hurt."
"She was pretty disturbed when she left. Maybe her anger caught up with her."
Faith winced at Leah's accusing tone. "I know she was angry with me. But that doesn't explain her not writing to you."
"I have to say, Faith, that I don't blame her for being angry. I think you treated her pretty shabbily."
The words hurt, and Faith wanted to explain. "Granted, I moved into the teacher's house. All the trouble that had been stirred up because of Sarah worried me sick. But I didn't know she would just up and leave."
Leah snorted a sharp breath. "What did you expect her to do? Hang around and watch you cozy up to Doc Litchfield?"
Faith's voice lifted. "I'm not cozying up to Joel. He's a friend who's trying to look out for me, that's all. Don't tell me Sarah used that as an excuse. She always runs from difficult situations. She ran before, when she thought I was going to marry Phillip-She didn't even talk to me about it, she just ran."
"That's not fair, and you know it," Leah said sternly. "Sarah told me she didn't want her feelings for you to cause a rift between you and Phillip. She thought it best to leave and let you go on with your plans. How could she know you loved her?"
"You're right," Faith said softly. "She didn't. I didn't know it myself until I saw her again and recognized who she was." Then she left, Faith thought, and a part of my heart went with her. Faith looked down at her entwined fingers then back at Leah. "Do you really think she ran this time because of Joel?"
"Partly that, and partly because of your attitude."
"My attitude?"
"You said it yourself, earlier. 'All the trouble that had been stirred up because of Sarah.' All Sarah did was try to help a colored man and his family. When you blamed her for the trouble that brought on, that hurt her. A lot."
Faith's hands curled into fists. "I know she didn't start the trouble, but when it turned violent, she seemed to be right in the thick of it. And Benjamin got dragged into it, too. Sarah knows how to take care of herself, but I couldn't stand the thought that Benjamin might get hurt. The Ku Klux Klan is a very real, very scary group. They kill people. I had to get him away from that danger." The emotion in Faith's voice intensified. "Just imagine, Leah, that Amy was in danger because of Phillip, and the only way to keep her safe was to leave him for eight months. Wouldn't you do it? Don't you understand?"
"I do understand that part. What I don't understand is why you laid all the blame on Sarah. You talk about being scared for Benjamin. Can't you see that Sarah feels responsible for you both? She was worried for Benjamin and you, and instead of supporting her, you got angry. Then you turned to Doc Litchfield."
"Joel's been trying to help."
Leah waved her hand. "Everything that happened seemed to be sucking all three of you into more violence. Then you turned your back on her and compounded her misery. By my guess, Sarah ran away because you're part of the problem. She needs your approval and support, and when you got angry with her, she was confused about how to handle it."
"You don't understand. No on
e understands." Faith felt like a fly caught in a sticky web with no way out.
"Understand what?"
"I was told some men planned to kill Sarah if she didn't stay away from me."
Leah looked startled. "What?"
"Yes, and between worrying about that, and worrying about Benjamin, and yes, worrying about myself, I was overwhelmed. I wasn't sure what to do. When Sarah said she was leaving, I was torn between wanting her to stay and wanting her to be safe."
"Why didn't you tell her that?"
"You know Sarah. She might have stayed just to show she wasn't afraid of anyone. I had to let her leave and pretend I didn't care." Faith hunched over and rubbed her face. After a moment, she sat up. "I honestly didn't think about how my actions looked to her. She must have believed I was truly leaving her."
"Are you?"
The question jolted Faith, and her own words startled her even further. "I don't know."
Once Rusty embraced the idea of learning to read, she went at it like a crow pecking seed in a cornfield. Sarah made a chart of all the letters, both printed and cursive, and their sounds, and they went over and over it until Rusty had memorized them all. Then Rusty sat shoulder to shoulder with Sarah as she related her tales of her early life, watched Sarah write the words, and repeated them as Sarah read them aloud.
This system worked well, and within a month, Rusty could read the familiar stories on her own. She insisted on reading them aloud to Mel. He was very supportive, even being receptive to the idea that Rusty could teach him to read after Sarah left.
"Do you have a post office box?" Sarah asked. She and Rusty had just finished another session and were sitting on the sofa together.
"No," Rusty said, "but we can get one."
"Do that, and I can send you some mail once in a while, and you can write back."
Rusty jumped up and danced excitedly. "That would be so nice. I ain't never got mail before."
In a surprise move, she plopped herself down in Sarah's lap and threw her arms about Sarah's neck. "You been so good to me, Sarah," she said softly. "I really want to do something to thank you." She pulled Sarah's head down, kissed her, and pushed her tongue past Sarah's lips.
Oh, God. Sarah's whole body ached with desire, and she gave in to the kiss and returned it. Rusty thrust her breasts against Sarah's and moved one arm to reach beneath Sarah's tunic. As soon as Rusty's hand touched her bare skin, Sarah broke off the kiss and pushed her away.
"Stop," she said in a hoarse voice. "I can't do this."
"Sure you can," Rusty said in a wheedling tone. "No one's here but you and me."
"I made a vow to Faith."
"But she's not here." Rusty ran a hand up Sarah's thigh. "She'll never know."
Sarah shoved Rusty's hand away and bolted up from the sofa. "But I'll know. I'm sorry, Rusty. You're a very attractive woman, and I like you a lot." Sarah broke out in a sweat, almost like with a sickness, but she didn't stray from what she knew was right. "But I love Faith, and I can't cheat on her."
"You're worried about her." Rusty's discerning remark startled Sarah.
"Yes, I am. We had a fight, and I stormed out and just kept going. I don't know how she feels about me now."
"If you care that much about her, you shouldn't be leaving her alone to wonder how you feel, just like you're wondering about her feelings. You should get yourself back there as soon as you can, sweep her off her feet, and tell her you love her. I like a woman of action, and I'll bet your Faith does, too. Whatever happens, you can't settle any argument when you're here and she's there."
Sarah rubbed the nape of her neck. She could see how her actions looked to Rusty, probably like a spoiled kid who ran off when she didn't get her way. Maybe Faith thought the same thing. Would Sarah's stubbornness push Faith toward Joel? Sarah's guts twisted. She had to get back before it was too late. "You're right. As soon as we can get out of here, I'll get on the train with Redfire and head home. I'm sorry I couldn't be the right one for you."
Rusty made a wry face. "I'm the one who should apologize. I told you I wouldn't cozy up to you unless you wanted me to, but you're so beautiful. With you right here in front of me all the time, I couldn't keep myself from trying. Please don't hate me for that."
Sarah reached for Rusty's hand and pulled her up off the sofa. She wrapped her arms around her and kissed her on the forehead. "I could never hate you. Let's just be good friends, all right?"
When Sarah heard Mel come in from outside, she let go of Rusty and stepped back.
"I guess I'll have to settle for that." Rusty gave a mock sigh.
"Settle for what?" Mel said.
"Settle for living with a pesky brother for the rest of my life."
Mel peered from one woman to the other. "You'll find someone else to live with, sis. I'm guessing you just accepted the fact that Sarah isn't the one."
"Yep. I offered her the world, and she said she already had the one she wanted."
Mel frowned and looked at Sarah. "You told us right from the beginning that you were promised to someone." Then he looked at Rusty. "But you didn't pay any attention to that? Shame on you then. You ain't getting any sympathy from me."
Sarah decided they needed a change of subject. "How much longer until we can get out of here?" Now that she'd decided to return home, the spring thaw couldn't come too soon for her. Her nerves had already started to jump.
Leah set her teacup on its saucer on the table. Her tone sharpened. "What does that mean, you 'don't know'?"
"Joel's asked me to marry him."
Leah drew in a sharp breath. "Are you going to?"
"I haven't answered him yet."
"So that line about him just being a friend who was trying to help you wasn't the whole truth?"
Faith answered reluctantly. "No. He's trying to persuade me that life with him would be safer and more acceptable than life with Sarah. Besides that, he says Sarah and I are living in sin."
"Ha! That's a good one. I'll bet he's committed more sins than either you or Sarah. Most of the men I've known sure have. So, would you settle on 'safer and more acceptable' in place of Sarah?"
"It's not that I want to replace Sarah. I have to think of Benjamin. Joel pointed out that, except for two train robberies, the Klan's only caused two more incidents in this area since Sarah left."
"I think I know the two he's referring to. The cowards set a flaming cross in Ezekial Perlmann's yard one time and busted the windows out of his tailor shop another time. The Perlmanns are one of the friendliest families in Bonneforte. They have a huge party planned for the whole town to celebrate their elder son's graduation from medical school. What have they done to provoke the Klan? Been born Jewish?"
"I have no idea what they might have done."
Leah waved her hand. "But the Perlmann attacks didn't have anything to do with Sarah. What does Benjamin think about you marrying Joel? Have you said anything to him about it?"
Faith's tone softened. "He doesn't like the idea. He loves Sarah." She stuck out her chin. "But it's not up to him. I'm the parent, and he'll do as I say."
"So Mama is God?"
Faith stiffened. "You don't like me much, do you?"
Leah lifted her arms, palms up, and dropped them. "Sarah loves you, and I love Sarah. Whatever choice she makes, I'll go along with. That includes you. But I find it difficult to like anyone who's hurting her."
"I'm not purposely hurting her."
"I'll try to accept that. As far as Doc Litchfield's concerned, please don't make any life-changing decisions until Sarah comes back. She deserves that consideration."
Faith felt a hint of sadness. "How do I even know she'll come back?"
Leah rose and went over to her. She gave Faith's shoulder a pat. "Sarah always keeps her word. Unless she's run into some kind of trouble that keeps her away, she'll be back. I know that."
Faith barely nodded.
At last, April brought spring to Wyoming. The middle of April to be exact. Snow was
melting, streams were running deeper and wider, and the trees looked livelier as new growth became apparent. Squirrels, rabbits, and other small animals could be seen in the woods, and birds returned in droves, adding to the few that had stayed through the winter.
Mel and Sarah stood just outside the barn, enjoying the fresh air after a hard day's work. "Listen to the birds," Sarah said. "It's good to hear something break this eternal silence. I'm so glad spring's here."
Mel reached over and thumped Sarah's back. "Just think, no more snow shoveling." Sarah had seen his arm move and braced herself for the thump, an action Mel seemed to favor. She surreptitiously raised her own arm and gave him a thump that almost knocked him over. She'd reveled in doing that to other "thumpers" a time or two in the past.
"Right," she said and grinned when he made an obscene gesture toward her. "And no more cleaning the cave corral every week. The animals can be outside now. How soon do you think we can leave here?"
"Two weeks, maybe. I guess you're in a hurry, huh?"
"I have family and friends who have to be wondering where I am. I need to let them know I'm all right."
"I know it wasn't in your plans, but it's been good having you here," Mel said. "Not to mention how I've enjoyed just looking at you, even if I didn't stand a chance with you."
Sarah unconsciously raised a hand to her face, and Mel brushed it away. "Forget about those scars," he said. "In a way, they just make the rest of your face look prettier."
How kind of him to say that. How kind he had been right from the start, bringing her here to save her from being robbed. Though a funny thing had happened. One day she had noticed her bag of silver dollars had been moved. Out of curiosity, she counted the coins and discovered nine were missing. That surprised her. Why would Rusty or Mel take only nine coins? And which one took them? She decided not to push the issue with the Gunthers. They had given her so much that she felt they were welcome to the coins. In fact, she planned to leave most of them here when she left. She always carried a few extra in a sack in her saddlebags. She just wished whichever one took them had asked.