by Leah Brooke
He wanted to protect her, to cherish her.
To make her his.
Gabriel twirled his glass, watching with amusement when she leaned forward and selected a grape from the array of snacks on the silver tray. “Let me ask you something, Kelsey. If you owned something that you valued above all else, something that you thought about day and night, something you cherished above all else, would you want to damage it?”
Popping the grape into her mouth, she paused as she reached for another, frowning. “Of course not.” Blinking, she sat back. “Wait a minute. Are you trying to tell me that you want to own the women you’re with?”
Gabriel met her eyes squarely, letting her see just how seriously he took this. “When I’m with a woman, my attention is focused on her. For that period of time, I possess her. I want a woman who’s mine.”
He’d never meant anything more.
Smiling at her look of shock, he reached for one of the plump grapes, his stomach muscles knotting with nerves and excitement. “You want to hear something really amusing? I didn’t even realize that I was ready for a woman of my own until I met you. I don’t even want to touch another woman. I want you, Kelsey, as much as I want my next breath.”
* * * *
Kelsey swallowed heavily, struck by the realization that she wanted him too much to avoid the inevitable. “What do you mean by that? I thought you had plenty of lovers.”
Trembling inside at the knowledge that this would really be happening—that she and Gabriel would become lovers, Kelsey struggled to hide her excitement, and the very real fear that she would disappoint him.
She couldn’t stop looking at his bare chest, wide and dark against the casual white, drawstring pants that settled low on his hips, her fingers itching to explore.
She didn’t even know if it would be allowed. She didn’t know if he was waiting for her to say or do something, and it left her in the unfamiliar territory of following his lead.
He smiled, his eyes filled with tenderness, but shimmering with a hint of something that looked surprisingly like sadness. “The women in my past are just that. Past. I haven’t been with another woman in months. I only want you.”
Kelsey gaped at him, wondering if she’d heard him right. She’d never imagined that he’d wanted her that way, and for so long. “What? Gabriel, I don’t—”
Gabriel held up a hand, cutting her off. “You’ve been honest with me tonight. I want to be honest with you. Trust is very important, remember?”
Kelsey swallowed heavily and nodded, her stomach tightening. “Okay.”
Gabriel stared into his glass. “I haven’t been serious about a woman in a long time. I’ve been with women, mostly at the club, but they’ve been casual. They knew the score, and it was all fun and games. I didn’t think I’d ever want a woman the way I want you. I never thought I’d want a woman to live with me, and to sleep in my bed every night—to share a future with.”
Kelsey blinked, curious and touched by his admission. “What happened? Did someone hurt you?” She hated the thought of any woman being close enough to Gabriel to hurt him.
Gabriel’s smile held a hint of sadness, a sadness that surprised her. “We wanted different things. She wanted the scenes and wanted to play. She wanted me to share her with others and liked to be the center of attention in the club. She did outrageous things and liked to make me jealous. She wanted me to pass her around when she knew damned well that I don’t share. It was all a game to her.”
Intrigued, confused, and desperate to understand such a complicated and intense man, Kelsey sat up. “I don’t understand. Isn’t it supposed to be a game?” Frowning, she set her glass aside, struggling to clear her head. “But why was it a game to her and not you? That doesn’t make any sense. You bossed her around. She would have had to do whatever you wanted.”
Shaking his head, Gabriel smiled faintly. “You know nothing about that kind of lifestyle. I’ll teach you.”
Kelsey sighed again, and took another sip of her wine. “I guess I thought it was all about sex. I mean, like in your club. I didn’t consider that a Dominant and a submissive would care for each other that way. Like I told you before, that part doesn’t make sense to me. You said something before about pain. That doesn’t make sense to me either. It scares me.”
He took another sip of wine, his eyes steady on hers over the rim of his glass. “I asked you before how you would treat something, or someone you value above all else. Do you really think I would mistreat a woman I cared for?”
“You could dominate a woman—have the kind of sex you like, and still care for her?”
“Of course.”
Kelsey reached for another grape as an excuse to look away. “Did you care for the women you took in the club?”
Gabriel smiled faintly. “Not in the way you mean. They want pleasure and excitement, and I give it to them. They gave me the same.”
Frowning into her glass again, Kelsey got to her feet and tried not to think about the number of women Gabriel had dominated in his club, women who knew how to play his games.
She didn’t know how she could ever compete with that.
Moving back to the French doors, she wrapped her arms around herself, chilled despite the warm sunshine.
To her surprise, Gabriel came up behind her, running his finger over her shoulder in a delicate caress that made every nerve ending tingle.
“It’s not as easy as you think for a Dominant to find a woman. What I need is not something that’s easy to work into a conversation. Sure, there are women in the club who offer themselves, but some of them want to make a play for the owner because it’s a status thing, or they’re looking for pleasure and nothing more. I have other business interests and can’t spend much time at the club, but when I’m there, I’m usually busy with things that need my attention.” Smiling, he slid his fingers over her shoulder again. “Besides, I find myself wanting something more.”
Shivering at his touch, Kelsey fought the urge to lean back against him. Blaming her weakness on the wine, the warm breeze blowing the flowing curtains, and the undivided attention of Gabriel at his sexiest, she stepped out to the balcony, gripping the rail.
Already missing his touch, she stared out at the ocean and the white beach below, her heart racing. “So, you’re looking for an affair?”
Intrigued at the idea, she hid a smile, wondering what Gabriel would say if he knew that she was actually considering it.
Coming up behind her again, Gabriel gripped the railing on either side of her, effectively blocking her in, the heat of his body surrounding her. His voice, low, velvety and as seductive as the island breeze caressed her. “No. I’m looking for a woman to spend the rest of my life with. No pretense. No lies. I want a woman who’ll belong to me. Totally. Completely. In every way.”
Trembling with a need unlike anything she’d ever experienced, a need that made her want to turn and throw herself against his chest, she swallowed heavily and struggled to keep her tone cool. “You want a woman to dominate. I don’t know if I can be that type of woman.”
Gabriel’s lips touched the outer curve of her ear, his breath warm against it, and sending a shiver through her that had another rush of moisture coating her inner thighs. “I think you’re exactly the kind of woman I need. And I think I’m what you need.”
Her beaded nipples began to ache unbearably, making it harder to concentrate on their conversation. Keeping her back to him, she glanced at him over her shoulder. “You make it sound so easy.”
The pregnant pause that followed was filled with tension, his eyes unreadable as he stared down at her. Finally he spoke, his deep voice carrying easily despite his low tone. “It won’t always be easy, but I think both of us can find what we need in each other.”
With a strangled laugh, Kelsey turned back to face the ocean, wanting him more with every word—every breath. “Like I said—arrogant.”
Running a hand over her arm, he leaned close. “That doesn’t mean
that I’m wrong.”
Tightening her grip on the railing, Kelsey took a deep breath and let it out slowly, her heart racing. She wished she could believe him, but so many things about his lifestyle made no sense to her.
She couldn’t deny, though, that she’d been aroused the entire time she’d been with him.
The breeze blew her skirt aside, and would have revealed her mound to anyone watching.
Thankfully, the beach was deserted.
The breeze, like a warm caress over her mound, stoked the fire inside her.
Not for the first time, she wondered about the kind of pleasure she could experience at Gabriel’s hands.
Releasing the railing, she gripped the edge of her skirt and turned, gasping at the feel of her aching nipples brushing against his chest. The surge of heat to her slit stunned her, creating the same tingling sensation she’d experienced on the beach.
He didn’t move away as she’d anticipated, leaning closer instead, and intensifying the closeness that had been building between them.
“There’s only one way to find out what it could be like between us, isn’t there?” He smiled, a flash of white against his olive skin, so overwhelmingly beautiful as she stared at him, unable to breathe.
Her fingers itched to touch him, to smooth over his wide chest, to slide into his ink-black hair. She couldn’t stop looking at his lips, her own tingling with awareness.
Kissing was overrated, as far as she was concerned, and entirely too intimate, but the desire to experience one of Gabriel’s kisses had her leaning closer before she could stop herself.
Realizing her mistake, she hurriedly straightened, tearing her gaze away from his lips to meet his eyes. She didn’t know how to proceed without leaving herself vulnerable to being hurt, or what he expected of her. “What do you have in mind?”
Gabriel’s smile sent a thrill through her, warming her everywhere. “Why don’t we start by getting some of your assumptions out of the way? You can ask me questions and satisfy your curiosity. Maybe it’ll help you relax a little.”
Feeling as if they’d taken one more step toward becoming lovers, Kelsey swallowed heavily, fighting her panic. “Gabriel, this is stupid. I—”
With a finger beneath her chin, he lifted her face to his. “Do you have any idea how close the bond is between a Master and his submissive? A relationship like that requires it, and if it’s a serious relationship, can be quite painful when it ends.” When a sudden gust of wind blew again, he smoothed her hair back while she concentrated on holding the edges of her skirt together.
Bending until their noses nearly touched, he ran the backs of his fingers over her cheek. “Once he finds the woman he’s been searching for, the woman he’s been waiting to take as his, it’s nearly impossible not to fall so deeply in love with her that he feels as if she’s a part of him.”
Frowning, Kelsey leaned back, finding it hard to think with his body pressed against hers. “Are you trying to convince me that a Dom really cares about his submissive—I mean other than for sex?”
“You’d be very surprised at just how much he comes to love her.” Gabriel moved aside and leaned against the railing, the breeze blowing his hair and making him look impossibly gorgeous. The relaxed side he showed to her now emphasized his raw masculinity, and the difference in them as man and woman as opposed to the difference in their social status.
His eyes moved over her face, lingering on her lips. “A Master has a larger responsibility to his submissive than you could imagine. He’s not just responsible for her pleasure and well-being, but he has to know her well enough to be able to challenge her—to take her past what she thought of as her boundaries. He needs to pay attention to everything about her and respect the boundaries she can’t get past. He needs to know her as well as he knows himself.”
Lulled by the soft silkiness in his voice, Kelsey hung on to every word. Swallowing heavily, she stared up at him through her lashes. “I’m scared.”
“I know.” The flash of satisfaction in his eyes disappeared almost immediately, making her wonder if she’d imagined it. “But, you’re going to do it anyway, aren’t you? I can see the excitement and fear in your eyes.”
Shaking her head, she sighed, once again surprised that he saw so much. “I think you’re going to be very disappointed.”
He caressed her cheek with the back of his hand in an affectionate gesture that sent her senses reeling. “I know you do, and I know there’s nothing I can say that would convince you otherwise. You’re just going to have to see for yourself.”
Taking a step back, she looked away. “We’re complete opposites.” Cursing her weakness, she looked at him again, her breath catching when he straightened.
Gabriel’s eyes danced in amusement, but she recognized a sharpening in them that put her on edge. “I think we have more in common than you think.”
His eyes narrowed on hers as he slowly slid the tip of one finger down her arm. “I understand that you’re the kind of woman who can’t resist a dare.”
Kelsey gritted her teeth against the sensation, sucking in another breath as the breeze caressed her bottom. Panicked, she gathered the ends of her skirt together again. “Julianna has a big mouth.” She pushed at his arm, relieved when he dropped it, allowing her to pass.
She wanted him too much to resist for long, but she couldn’t make this easy for him. She had to find a way to stand out from the other women he’d taken, or she’d just be another notch on his bedpost.
Having sex with him would be quite a gamble for her—one that could cost her dearly.
She had to hope that she could hold his interest long enough for her to learn how to please him, and somehow win his heart. She wanted desperately to believe that he had feelings for her, and could only hope that his words weren’t part of a game he played with his submissives.
He’d given her hope for the real thing, and she couldn’t settle for less.
Fawning all over him like a schoolgirl, and telling him how much she truly cared for him would just scare him away, and make her look even more naïve.
Looking up at him, she shifted restlessly. “It’s got to mean something, even if it’s just respect.”
“Careful, darling. I’ll take your fear and confusion into consideration, but I won’t tolerate being insulted.”
He must have read her unease, because he smiled, his eyes gentling. “You really know nothing about what I want from you, do you?”
Kelsey turned and went back into the suite. “I’ve already told you that.” She picked up her glass of wine and plopped back onto the sofa, staring up at him as he stood on the threshold. “I thought all men wanted sex, but I figured a man like you would insist on it. Isn’t that the point of being a Dominant?”
Gabriel shook his head. “Like I said, you know nothing about what I want from you.”
Kelsey couldn’t stop shaking. More nervous by the minute, and trembling with the need to touch herself and relieve the ache between her thighs, she smiled to hide the turmoil raging inside of her. “So why don’t you tell me?”
Gabriel’s smile made her stomach clench. “I’ll do better than that, darling. I’ll show you.” Coming into the room, he ran his hand over the back of the sofa, barely brushing her arm as he passed her.
“Do you remember what I said about giving yourself to me?” At her wary nod, he inclined his head and walked past her, picking up his glass of wine from the table before sitting on the other end of the sofa again. “I’ll just ask for a small part of you.”
Narrowing her eyes, she took in his relaxed pose, which contrasted sharply with the heat in his eyes, and wondered what he was up to. “Why would you do that?”
He smiled, as if he’d expected the question. “To build trust. To give you a taste of what you could expect from me. To let you experience what it would feel like. To satisfy your curiosity and let you know what it feels like to be connected to someone else in ways you’ve never been before—in ways you’ve pro
bably never even imagined.”
A thrill went through her as temptation became nearly overwhelming. Tantalized by the chance to spend a week living what would undoubtedly be the erotic experience of a lifetime, she stared into his eyes, struck by the solemnity in them.
“Baby steps?”
Gabriel inclined his head. “You can stop at any time. We won’t even begin until you’re ready.” A dark brow went up. “That is, if you aren’t too afraid of actually feeling something, instead of going through life on the outskirts, never getting involved. Playing it safe. Everything depends on your willingness to take a step or two out of your comfort zone.”
“A step or two? It sounds like a hell of a lot more than that.”
Scraping a hand through his hair, he blew out a breath, his frustration and anger shocking her. “Kelsey, I want you. If nothing else, I want you to know what it feels like to be with a man who cares about you. I only want what you’re willing to give, as slowly as you want to give it. This isn’t a game to me. I don’t want you taking back what you’ve already given as a power play or because you’re pissed at me for something. Those kinds of things have no place in what I’m proposing.”
To her further shock, he reached for her, yanking her against him. Clenching his hands on her upper arms, he lifted her to her toes. “God help me, Kelsey, I want you. I won’t settle for half-measures.”
Wrapped in his arms and nestled against his bare chest, Kelsey found herself enveloped in a warmth that penetrated deep, melting something that had been frozen inside her.
Stunned that such a man could want her so much, she blinked back tears and lifted her head, staring up into his eyes. “I’ll be honest with you. I’m a little afraid. I don’t know how to do this.”
Looking into her eyes, Gabriel brushed her hair back from her face. “There’s nothing to be afraid of. Trust me, Kelsey. Please. Let me show you just how perfect we are for each other. Let’s take advantage of the time we have together.”