“Dude, when did you become my big brother? I’m fine. I’m the one who’s supposed to be looking out for you.”
Blake smothers a chuckle. “Never going to happen. I like looking out for you too much. Besides, you wouldn’t be able to look out for me even if you wanted to. I’m a free spirit, Sky. You can’t rein this in.”
I grumble under my breath and launch a cushion across the room, laughing as it smacks him in the face. “You’re a dirty turdy,” I tell him. “Where are you going anyway?”
“One of the guy’s places. I think someone said it was Fischer’s place, but I could be wrong. I think I learned too many names at once. They’re all starting to smoosh together.”
“Tell me about it,” I murmur. “Just don’t be home too late. You have practice tomorrow.”
“Are you seriously putting a curfew on me?”
“Damn straight I am. You’re my responsibility whether you like it or not. 10 pm on school nights, 1 am Friday night and on Saturday night I don’t really care as long as you check in and let me know you’re still alive. Oh, and please don’t go anywhere without taking protection with you. If you’re going to keep fucking around all the time, I want you to be safe.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Blake mutters darkly, sitting up on my bed.
I shake my head. “I’m serious. I know you think you’re some kind of adult, but you’re only sixteen. You have too much ahead of you to screw it all up now. I want you to make it big and it’s not going to happen unless you learn a bit of self-discipline.”
Blake lets out a frustrated huff as we hear the front door open. “You’re lucky I love you.”
“And you’re lucky I haven’t busted your balls about your new girlfriend,” I tell him, narrowing my eyes. “She’s not going to be there tonight, is she?”
Blake shrugs as a cheesy, excited grin rips across his face. “Probably not, but I might see what she’s doing.”
“Goodluck,” I mutter under my breath, earning myself a confused stare from my little brother, silently demanding I explain myself. “Maze mentioned that she was a big clinger. She’s probably the type to steal a used rubber and impregnate herself.”
His face drops as horror seeps into his eyes. “You’re lying.”
“Nope. Maze said so herself. What you want to do with that information is your business.”
“Fuck. I don’t want no clinger.”
“Then fuck around with someone else, better yet, don’t fuck around at all.”
“What about Maze?” Blake questions as a devilish grin slowly spreads across his face. “Did you get her number today?”
“Don’t even think about it,” I warn him. “She’s the only person on my side at this damn school. Don’t fuck that up for me because of your sick need to constantly get your dick wet.”
“Okaaaay,” Shaylee’s disturbed groan comes from the door of my bedroom. “I’m going to do my damn hardest to pretend that I didn’t just hear that.”
Blake cringes and throws a sharp glare at me for always needing to run my mouth. He gets up off my bed and stalks toward the door. “Well, this just got too awkward for me. I’m out.”
Blake stalks past Shaylee and she laughs at his back before bringing her questioning gaze back to me. “Where’s he going?”
“Chilling with some of the boys on his team, but don’t worry. I gave him a curfew. He’ll be home by ten.”
Shaylee raises a brow, looking doubtful. “Will he really?”
I nod. “Yeah. Blake might be a brat at times, but he’s respectful and doesn’t like me to worry. He’ll be here, though he might push the boundary by fifteen minutes.”
Shaylee turns back to where Blake had just exited my room and a fondness creeps over her features. “Oh, good. He seems like a good kid.”
“The best kid,” I correct.
“So, he made some friends today? Was everything alright with his coach and getting what he needs for the team?”
I shrug my shoulders. “I guess. He would have mentioned if he had any major problems, but he’s pretty independent. When it comes to Blake Daniels, his problems are his own. Unless it's important he'd never ask for help. Though things might start changing for him now that we don’t have the same kind of financial backing that came with our old life. I don’t know. I think he’ll be alright though. I worry about him.”
“I know you guys are different from the children I once knew all those years ago, but from where I’m standing, you’re both incredibly strong. Blake can handle himself. I don’t think you need to worry about him.”
“I know,” I sigh, glancing away. “Old habits die hard, I guess.”
Shaylee presses her lips into a tight line and nods, giving me a moment to collect my thoughts. “What about you?” she questions softly, leaning against the doorframe. “How’d your first day go? Did you run into any problems?”
Slade’s face instantly flashes through my mind and I do my best not to let my disdain show. “Nothing I can’t handle,” I grumble under my breath, mostly to myself.
A heavy sigh comes from Shaylee, and I could be wrong but it almost sounded heartbroken. She pushes off the doorframe and welcomes herself into my room. She perches herself on the end of my bed, right where Blake had been two minutes ago. “You don’t have to do that, you know? You don’t have to hide, not here. You can talk to me if there’s something you’re struggling through.”
I look away, unsure of how to react in this situation. The home life I had growing up was not rainbows and flowers. My ‘parents’ never taught me how to communicate in this way and I honestly don’t know what to do about it.
Instantly, I go into shut down mode. I curl in on myself as a wave of awkwardness comes over me. “I’m sorry,” Shaylee murmurs, seeing my obvious freak out. “I just wish we could find that carefree, loving relationship that we had when you were a little girl.”
I look away with a cringe. “I…I’m sorry, but I don’t remember it.”
Shaylee’s eyes drop to the ground. “No need to be sorry,” she tells me. “You were only four years old and already had the weight of the world on your shoulders. I don’t expect you to remember much from that time.”
Her words have that familiar nausea creeping up on me just as it does every time I’m thrown back into the past and see the images of my parents drowning in their own blood. As if not noticing my inner turmoil, Shaylee continues. “I hate that you had to go through all of that. Ben and I were your only family and we failed you. We should have kept searching, we could have saved you.”
“There was no saving us,” I say bluntly. “No one could have saved us, not even God himself.”
“Sky,” Shay says, hurt. “I’ll never be able to apologize enough. You and Blake went through so much, but all we can do now is help you two move forward. I honestly wish there was more we could do for you. I don’t know…somehow help you heal. I just wish you would give me some sort of clue as to how we can do that. You’re so closed off with such a chip on your shoulder. I wish you’d open up to me so I can help you get through this.”
“No one can help me, Shay. The things I’ve been through…you’d never be able to relate. How could you possibly help me?”
“That’s what I’m asking you,” she challenges. “Anything you need, all you have to do is ask and I’ll be there to help make this easier.”
I sit in silence, struggling to sort through the thousands of torturous thoughts rushing through my mind and making a scrambled mess. Shaylee leans forward and takes my hand and I can’t help but look down at her on my bed. Her eyes—so much like my mom's— are brimming with unshed tears and her pain threatens to tear me apart.
“I get it,” she tells me, fighting against the lump in her throat. “You’re not ready for this, not ready to open up and share yourself with the world, but let me help you.”
“I don’t know how,” I insist, fighting against my own tears. “If I knew how to make this better, knew how to make thi
s pain go away, I would have done it a long time ago.”
“I know,” she tells me. “Believe me, I wish I had some kind of secret formula to give you to make this all okay, but I can’t. Why don’t we start small? I know I can’t relate to you about your parents and the hell you’ve been through over the past thirteen years, but I do know what it’s like being seventeen and in high school. So, tell me about that.”
I study her for a long moment, wondering why I’m finding it so hard to suck in a decent breath. Why does my chest hurt like this? “I…I don’t know,” I tell her, terrified of making any sort of connection with her. After all, the people I love are always taken away from me, and just when you think you can trust someone, they hurt you. I can’t risk letting her in.
I want to trust her. I want to be able to let go of this pain and finally open myself up to the possibility of a future, family, and love, but for now, it’s just me and Blake against the world, just as it’s always been.
“That’s okay,” she tells me, giving my hand a squeeze. “It’s too soon, you’ve only been here a week, but just know that I’m not going to stop trying.”
“I don’t want you to.”
A soft smile brightens her face and the features that remind me so much of my mom. “One of these days, you’re going to realize that you have the whole world at your feet, just like Blake and it’s going to be such a joy to watch.” The tears finally drop from her eyes and she hastily wipes them away. “Crap, I promised myself that I wasn’t going to cry. I want to be strong for you, Skylah, because you deserve nothing less.”
“It’s okay to cry,” I tell her. “You’re only human.”
“Aren’t I supposed to be the adult here?”
I shrug my shoulders. “I was forced to grow up quickly.”
Shaylee sighs to herself. “I wish I knew the horrors that you’ve been through, Sky.”
I don’t answer but it’s not like she was expecting me to. “Okay,” she says, getting up from my bed. “If you’re sure you don’t want to talk, then I might go and work out what I’m going to make for dinner, but you know where to find me if you change your mind.”
I nod and with one more tight smile, Shaylee slips out of my bedroom and gently closes the door behind her.
The second the door clicks into place, intense loneliness sweeps over me. Tears begin to fall and I collapse down onto my bed, smooshing my face into my pillow. I search within for that hatred and anger that I felt when dealing with Slade Cruz at school today as clinging onto those feelings is a shitload easier than feeling the pain and turmoil that comes to haunt me whenever my parents and past are mentioned.
The pain begins to fade as I allow the war with Slade to overtake my mind and just like that, I realize that Slade Cruz is going to be the new shining star of my life, at least until I find someone or something else that can help dull the ache that resides inside my soul.
Chapter 4
A bright light flashes through my bedroom window and my eyes shoot toward it, but it’s gone in a split second. My heart instantly races as my fingers curl around the pocketknife under my pillow.
He’s found me. I knew he would come, but I didn’t realize it would happen quite this fast.
I barely have a second to throw my blanket off my legs before the light is shining through my bedroom window once again. I tighten my grip on the knife, never so damn relieved that Blake’s spending the night with friends.
I clamber out of bed, pissed off that my body is moving so slow. I will not go through this again. I let my guard down, I should have been ready, just like I’ve always been before, just like I’ve trained myself to be.
I move back toward my bedroom door and unlock it, ready to make a run for it if need be. What was I thinking of coming here? Blake and I should have just stayed on our own. There are only a few months before my eighteenth birthday. We could have made it on our own. Why did I have to bring this mess to Shay and Ben’s door?
The light flickers as the person fumbles to open the window. They’re going to have a hell of a time getting in since I locked that fucker.
I flick the blade out and indulge in the feeling of power that comes with having this weapon securely in the palm of my hand. I've dreamed of this moment despite the fear that comes with it. I've imagined what I would do, how I would react...how damn good it would feel to finally get the upper hand.
The window rattles and I swallow back fear. I will not be afraid. I will not go back to that place that holds all my nightmares. He can't make me.
The light flickers around, goes dark and comes back into view. Knuckles rap against the glass and I take a step forward, preparing myself. “Hey, open up,” comes a feminine voice, muffled by the closed window. There's a strange familiarity that has my brows drawing down in confusion. "How are all the devilish boys supposed to sneak in here and do naughty things to you all night long if you've got the freaking window locked?"
The fuck?
"Maze?" I call out, refusing to let up on my pocketknife.
The light moves around and a second later I see Maze's grinning face lit up but the angle she holds the light from has her covered in shadows and looking more like a scene from a horror movie than the too chatty girl from school.
“Who the fuck else would it be?” she demands, turning the light back to the window and searching me out. "Wait...is that a fucking knife in your hand? Shit, I underestimated you. I took you for more of a talker than an action girl. What were you planning on doing with that thing anyway? Actually, open the fucking window first and then you can explain yourself."
I snap back to reality. "What?" I grunt, slipping the blade away tossing it to the bed. After turning on the light, I stride forward and go about unlocking the window. “Explain myself? How about you? You're the one showing up at my window in the middle of the night.”"
I get the window unlocked and slide it up, cringing at the way the old frame squeals in protest. Maze climbs through the open window, groaning and grunting with every movement. “Hey, I'm the good guy here, and for the record. It’s not the middle of the night. It’s barely even 10 pm,” she says once she's safely on her feet, instantly looking around my empty room. "I came to break you out of this hell hole."
I cross my arms and raise a questioning brow. "How did you know where I live?"
“How else?” she grumbles, walking around my room and picking up one of my shirts. She holds it against herself, checking her reflection in my mirror and clearly liking what she sees. "I stole your file from the school office."
I instantly go on high alert and as if sensing my unease, she continues on. “Chill out, would you?” Maze grumbles as she peels off her shirt and replaces it with mine. “I may be nosey, but I know a thing or two about respecting one’s privacy. I looked up your address and that's it. Though, I can't say that I'm not curious. That file was fucking thick. You must have gotten yourself into all sorts of shit before winding up here.”
Relief rushes through me though I’m not quite sure I believe her. She's been great so far but what kind of person doesn't peek at the new girl's file given the chance? But then, she's not looking at me with pity, disgust or sadness so maybe she's telling the truth.
I walk around to my bed and slide the pocketknife back under my pillow. “So, what are you actually doing here?”
“I told you; I'm breaking you out of here.”
“And taking me where?”
“Wherever you want.”
I let out a sigh and consider it a moment. It's not like I was going to get any sleep after the fear she invoked inside of me earlier. “You better make it worth my while,” I tell her, grabbing one of the only shirts left in my closet and peeling out of my pajamas.
Maze chuckles to herself before dropping down on my bed and watching as I pull my ripped jeans into place over my ass. “Trust me,” she says with a sly grin as she pulls a perfectly rolled joint out of her pocket. "I got you covered.”
I grin back at her. “
Well, damn. How could I say no?”
Maze’s eyes crinkle with excitement and within seconds, we’re slipping out of my bedroom window. I pull my leather jacket on as we trail up the driveway and just when I think I’ve gotten away with it, Blake’s laughter rumbles from behind me. “Well, well. Double standards I see.”
I groan and turn around to face a smirking Blake. “Hey, I said you had a curfew of 10 pm, not me.”
“That’s bullshit,” he says, his eyes flicking between me and Maze. “Where the hell are you two going?”
“Just out,” I say as Maze gives him her best bedroom eyes which instantly gets his attention. “And no, you can’t come.”
“Oh, come on,” he groans, walking toward us. “Since when can’t I come?”
Since I plan on smoking a joint. This dirty little habit isn’t exactly something that I share with my little brother. He has a good head on his shoulders but he’s impressionable and I don’t doubt that if he comes, he’ll ask to try and it’s not something I want him getting involved with. Besides, he has basketball to think about.
“You have a curfew,” I remind him, “and I sort of explained that to Shay. She’s been sitting up, watching Netflix with Ben all night waiting for you. I don’t know what she’s expecting but I think she wants to play the supportive aunty role and make sure you’re being a good little boy and not falling in with the wrong crowd.”
Blake grins. “You mean like you,” he says, slowly trailing his gaze back to Maze and making her squirm under his stare.
“I resent that,” she shoots back at him.
“Promise, I’ll make it up to you.”
“Okay…enough of this shit,” I say, pulling out my boss bitch, big sister tone. “You need to get your ass inside before Shay sends Ben out here to find out where you are.”
“Damn it,” Blake groans. “Did you really have to tell her?”
“Of course, I did. I want the best for you even if that means having people like Shay and Ben helping me look out for you. You’ll thank me one day.”
“Doubt it,” he groans, spinning on his heel and heading back toward the house while waving over his shoulder. “Don’t do anything stupid.”
Ugly Girl: Aston Creek High (Book 1) Page 3