by Kiki Swinson
“Get this crazy bitch off me!” Aunt Sandra screamed.
I scrambled to the floor and grabbed hold of Rachael’s left arm while Carmen grabbed the right one. She and I both used every muscle we had to pull her off Aunt Sandra. Right after we pulled Rachael off Aunt Sandra, Rachael kicked her directly in her mouth while Aunt Sandra was trying to stand to her feet. It was unbelievable how the force from Rachael’s boot knocked teeth out of her mother’s mouth. It all happened so fast. Blood squirted everywhere. And when Aunt Sandra saw the blood pouring from her mouth like a faucet, she immediately covered her mouth with both of her hands. I heard her scream behind her muffled mouth.
“Oh, my God, Rachael! Why the fuck you do that?” Carmen yelled.
I stood there frozen because I didn’t know what to say, much less what to do. But Carmen rushed toward Aunt Sandra. “Ma, run to the bathroom and get a towel,” Carmen instructed. They both ran out of the room.
“That’s what the fuck she gets. Don’t help that fucking crackhead because she’s gonna stab you in your back next and then you’re gonna go upside her fucking head, too!” Rachael clowned the situation.
I turned and looked at her because I was completely taken aback by this whole ordeal. I would not have ever believed that I would witness a daughter jump on on her mother and beat her like I just saw Rachael do. And to add fuel to the fire, she cursed her out while she was attacking her. So with all this in mind, I couldn’t pass up the chance to ask her what prompted her to react the way she just had. Curiosity was killing me inside. “What is wrong with you?”
Rachael stood there in front of me. “Ain’t nothing wrong with me. I’m fine.”
“Well, why did you just go off on your mother like that?”
“Because the bitch is disrespectful,” she replied, and then she started looking around her bedroom for something to get the blood off the hardwood floor.
“What did she do?”
“While I was downstairs getting my boyfriend, Rodney, a cup of Kool-Aid and a plate of food, he was up here chilling on my bed watching TV till I got back. So when I came upstairs with his drink and stuff in my hands, I found my mama’s crackhead ass down on her knees begging him to give her ten dollars and she’d suck his dick.”
In total disbelief, my mouth dropped wide open. “You saw her doing what?”
“I saw her on her damn knees begging her daughter’s boyfriend to let her suck his dick for ten dollars. Now, how embarrassed do you think I was when I walked up on that bullshit?”
“I can’t imagine,” I commented.
“What did Rodney do?”
“I saw him push her back and tell her to go away with her silly ass! But she kept right on begging him until I scared the shit out of her and told her to get the fuck out my room.”
“So how did you two start fighting?”
“Well, we started fussing first and since Rodney didn’t want to hear it, he told me he was going outside to eat his food. I gave him his plate and he left. And right after that, shit just got out of hand.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
Rachael got down on the floor and started wiping up the blood with an old holey shirt. “Yoshi, my mama told me straight to my face that if Rodney wasn’t in my bedroom, she could’ve gotten him to give her ten dollars to suck his dick because they’ve done it before in one of these abandoned buildings around here.”
“She told you that?”
“Yeah, she told me that bullshit. That’s why I went off and smacked the hell out of her.”
“Oh, my God, Rachael! Do you think she was telling you the truth?” I wondered aloud.
“Hell, nah, I don’t believe that shit! Rodney wouldn’t dare do something like that, and especially with her.”
“Well, why do you think she would say something like that? Those are some touchy accusations.”
“She just wants some fucking attention and since nobody is giving her any, she’s gonna try everything within her power to make herself be seen.”
“Do you think you’ll be able to forgive your mother for what she did tonight?”
“Probably not! I just want her to stay as far as possible away from me. She is like a thorn in my side. She ain’t never been there for me or Carmen. All she wants to do is hang out in those streets and get high. I wish she would just disappear and never come back.” Rachael got back on her feet with the bloody shirt in her hand.
She walked over to a small trash can that stood next to her nightstand and threw the shirt inside it. Then she reached for the handbag on her bed. “I got to go.” She sighed.
“Where are you off to?”
“I’m going outside to see where Rodney is.”
“You be careful then.”
“I will,” she assured me, then stepped into the hallway. She stood by the door and waited for me to follow her out so she could close it behind us. When I did so, she pulled the door shut and locked it. I stood in the hallway and watched her as she walked down the stairwell and headed outside. It was clear to me that she was one hurt individual. She hadn’t just gone off the deep end on her mother because of what Sandra said to her boyfriend; she did it because of old hurt, unhealed wounds from her past. This left me to wonder if Carmen and I hadn’t come when we did, would Rachael have done even more damage than she had? I shook my head in dismay because this family was in desperate need of some serious counseling.
After I watched Rachael leave the house, I started toward the bathroom to check on Carmen and Aunt Sandra, but at the last minute I decided to go check on Grandma Hattie first. Her bedroom was a couple feet from the hallway bathroom, so I moseyed right in that direction. I knocked on the door and announced who I was. Several seconds later, I heard her unlock the door to let me in. When the door opened, I saw her bedroom was dark except for the tiny light she had underneath her lampshade beaming from her nightstand. She looked like she was very weary. Her eyes were really puffy, so I grabbed her hand and said, “Are you okay?”
She sighed heavily and said, “Baby, I don’t know how much longer I’m gon’ be able to keep taking this mess around here.”
I walked inside her bedroom and closed the door behind me. She shuffled back to her bed and took a seat on the edge of it and I took a seat next to her. “Do you want to get out of here for a while?” I asked her.
“No, baby. All I need is to spend some alone time with my God and I will be just fine.”
“Are you sure?” I pressed the issue.
Grandma Hattie patted me on my thigh and nodded. So I put my arm around her shoulder and kissed her on the cheek. “You are so sweet!” she told me.
“No, Grandma. You are. I mean, you are one of the nicest women I have come in contact with for some time now. On top of that, you are a strong woman, so to sit right here next to you and see how upset you are really does something to me.”
“Yoshi, I’ve tried so hard to deal with all the crap that goes on around here. But when I saw my granddaughter jump on her own mother and beat her down like a dog, that really took something out of me. My heart couldn’t take it. I wanted God to take me away from here that very moment. That’s why I ran in here and locked my door.”
“I’m sorry you had to witness that, Grandma. But what’s done is done. Rachael has gone outside and Carmen has Aunt Sandra in the bathroom trying to clean her up.”
“I hope no one was hurt really bad.”
“Rachael is fine. But she did knock out a couple of Aunt Sandra’s front teeth.”
Grandma Hattie placed her hands across her mouth. “Oh, my God! What in the world has gotten into that girl? Is she insane?”
“No, she’s not insane. She’s just hurt. And when people are hurt, they will do the unthinkable.”
“I see right now I’m gon’ have to pray harder for this family because everybody has allowed the devil to get in their heads.”
“Well, pray for me while you’re at it.”
She and I talked for a few more minutes an
d then I made my exit. I kissed her once again on the cheek and told her I had to head back to my hotel. “Call me if you need anything,” I told her.
“I will.” She smiled and then I closed her bedroom door.
While I was heading toward the stairwell, I noticed the bathroom door was open but Carmen and Aunt Sandra were nowhere to be seen. I looked over at Carmen’s bedroom door and it was closed, so I walked downstairs. When I reached the bottom, I called out Carmen’s name, but she didn’t answer, so I opened the front door to leave. And when I did, I realized she was standing outside on the front porch talking to her mother. I had every intention of giving them their space and walking right by them, but Carmen was not having it. She grabbed my arm and pulled me into their circle.
“Where you going?” she asked.
“I’ve got to get back to the hotel. I am so tired and I need a hot shower.”
“Well, I ain’t gonna hold you. I just wanted you to know how sorry I am that you had to get involved with all that drama. But you saw how crazy it was, so you knew I wouldn’t have been able to break it up by myself.”
“There’s no need for any apologies. You guys are family. End of story,” I replied, pulling away from Carmen’s grip. Aunt Sandra had taken a seat on a chair. I guess she didn’t want to be in the company of Carmen and me as we exchanged words. I did get a chance to look in her face before I stepped foot off the porch, but she couldn’t look me straight in the eyes. It was apparent that she was embarrassed by what had just happened to her. And from the way I saw it, she should have been. I mean, how can you get up enough nerve to approach your daughter’s man and ask him to give you ten dollars for a blow job? That is degrading and nasty! Not to mention you get busted and then you get your ass kicked. How fucked-up is that? I swear, there’s a lot of shit out here they need to learn.
A New Day
When I woke up, I felt refreshed. All the drama I had encountered the previous night went right out the window. But in the back of my mind, I knew I was about to embark on yet another adventurous day. I showered, slipped on a light blue and gray Puma sweat suit with a pair of Puma sneakers to match, then combed my hair back to another ponytail. The weather report indicated that it was fifty-eight degrees outside, so I slid on a heavier jacket, grabbed my handbag, and headed out the door.
I hadn’t called Carmen or Grandma Hattie to let them know that I was coming over. I felt the urge to sneak up and surprise them. Surprisingly enough, Grandma Hattie was outside on her front porch when I pulled up. She smiled at me the moment she laid eyes on me. I smiled right back at her, noticing that she was not wearing a coat. She stood at the edge of the porch with her hands pushed down inside the front pockets of her robe.
“Where is your coat, Grandma?” I asked the moment I hopped out of the truck.
“Honey, Grandma don’t need no coat. I’m used to this crazy weather,” she told me.
I walked up the steps to greet her, leaned over and kissed her. “It sure is crazy,” I agreed right after I pulled back from her. “So, what are you doing outside?”
“Waiting on the mailman. Around here you got to get your mail straight from the mailman’s hand to yours, if you’re waiting on some important stuff like a check or something. ’Cause folks out here in this neighborhood would walk up to your mailbox and take your mail clean away from you without even blinking an eye. I know because I done had it done to me.”
“Are you serious?”
“Yes, ma’am. I am. Not too long ago, my SSI check walked right out of my mailbox, and I never found out who stole it from me either.”
“Did you report it to the Social Security office?”
“Yeah, I did. But those folks down there didn’t do anything about it.”
“Wow! That’s sad.”
“It sure is. But let me tell you something, sweetheart. My God loves me! And he has always taken care of me, too. So, all the mess those people took me through down there at the Social Security office and all the chaos my children and grandchildren take me through on a daily basis—I try to deal with it as best as I can because I know the Lord ain’t gonna put on me more than I can bear.”
I shook my head in disbelief because I couldn’t fathom putting up with the shit she put up with every day. I’d always known her to be a strong woman, but I never imagined she had to be this strong. I patted her on her shoulder and said, “All I can say is, may God continue to bless and watch over you because I wouldn’t be able to walk in your shoes.”
“He will, sweetie! He will,” she assured me.
Now while she and I continued to chat, the mailman finally walked up and handed her the mail she had waited so patiently for. She smiled at him, bid him farewell, and told him to be careful as he continued his route. He assured her that he would.
“Come on, let’s get inside before you freeze your butt off,” she said, and turned around to enter the house.
“Good idea,” I replied, following her.
The house was so quiet you could hear a pin drop. I assumed that whoever was there had to be asleep. I followed my grandmother and ended up in the kitchen.
“Hungry?” she asked.
“Sure. What did you have in mind?”
“When was the last time you had some good ol’ corned beef hash with two eggs cooked over easy and a bowl of hot grits?”
“Probably the last time I visited you.”
“Well then, it’s time to get you back into the groove of things,” she said. She grabbed a can of corned beef hash and a box of grits from the pantry. Then she reached inside her refrigerator and retrieved a carton of eggs.
“Want a glass of apple juice or a cup of coffee?” she asked.
“Coffee is fine,” I told her. “So, where is everybody?” I continued, as I watched her take a mug from a cabinet to prepare me a cup of coffee.
“Carmen is upstairs, asleep. And my Rachael just left to go to Thomas Market up on the next block. I think she said she was going down there to get her a box of cereal and some milk. She’s one of them youngsters who likes to eat that Fruity Pebbles mess instead of a healthy breakfast.”
“Where is Aunt Sandra?”
She sat the cup of coffee on the table directly in front of me. “Honey,” she began, “I haven’t seen her since the fight last night. But I’m sure she’s all right, though, because no one has come and knocked on my door to tell me they found her body laid out in one of these back alleys. All I can do is pray that she wakes up and decides she wants to get her life together.”
I shook my head before I took a sip of my coffee. From the looks of things, all three of her children, including my father, had done absolutely nothing with their life. And what made matters even worse was that her grandchildren had followed down their parents’ same path. I mean, look at Carmen. She looked like she’d been through the rough. She had drug use written all over her face when I first saw her yesterday. She may not have used them in a while, but there was a lot of evidence in her whole appearance that lead me to believe that she was a heavy user. So, she definitely followed her mother’s footsteps. Now, I can’t say for sure who Carmen was before I resurfaced, but people have always said that an apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree. Shit, look at my life and compare it to my late father’s. He was a drug user and a fucking alcoholic. So, there you go. Now, my uncle Reginald’s only son, I’m not sure about. But from what I heard about my uncle’s alcohol addiction, it wouldn’t surprise me if his son had one as well.
“When was the last time you seen Uncle Reginald’s son, Alonzo?” I asked, changing the subject.
“Oh, my God! It’s been about five years now. But your uncle Reginald said the military got him stationed out there in Iraq.”
“Oh, so he’s in the military?”
“Yes, honey, he sure is. And I heard he’s doing good, too. He sent us some pictures not too long ago of his wife and three kids.”
Shocked, I said, “Oh really.”
“Yep, he sure did. And his c
hildren are so beautiful. He done went out there and married a Spanish woman.”
“How old is he now?”
“I reckon he’s about thirty-eight or thirty-nine because he was running around here at least four or five years before you and Carmen came into this world.”
“So, where are his wife and kids? Because I know they aren’t in Iraq with him.”
“Oh, no. They live in California.”
“Oh, okay. Sounds good,” I commented, then I took a sip of my coffee. And as I was about to make more inquiries about my father, I heard the front door open.
“There’s Rachael right there,” my grandmother announced as she continued preparing the hot pot of grits and the frying pan filled with corned beef hash.
When Rachael walked into the kitchen, her face lit up. I smiled at her and said, “Good morning.”
“Good morning to you, too,” she replied, then took a seat at the table.
“How are you feeling this morning?”
“I’m kind of sore. But I’m cool.”
“She knows she better not try that stunt again because God don’t like ugly. I don’t care how your parents treat you, you are supposed to always respect them and your days will be longer,” Grandma Hattie said.
“Don’t tell her nothing, Grandma, because Mama is gonna show her something the next time she puts her hands on her,” Carmen interjected as she walked into the kitchen to join us. She wore a pair of old shorts and a Mickey Mouse T-shirt and a pair of old socks. She waved at me and headed straight to the refrigerator and grabbed the bottle of apple juice.
“She ain’t gonna do a thing to me,” Rachael snapped.
“You think you’re so bad, but walk up on the right one and they’re gonna knock you out!” Carmen told her. Then she stood behind Grandma, waiting for her to hand her a glass from the cabinet.