“And those were real memories based on real experiences,” Kash reminded me. “What Payne has here is fake. None of this is him. It’s who he’s been manipulated to become.”
“And Trinity?”
“Will get over it. He’s a stranger. He’s not her father. He—”
Larkin dashed into the room like a mini whirlwind. “Someone’s coming!”
The door opened a moment later, letting in the fresh night air and the unmistakable aroma of pepperoni pizza.
Payne entered the lounge and froze, pizza box in one hand, slice halfway to his mouth. His brows snapped down, and then the box was on the floor and he was wielding a dagger.
Nice.
“Stop!” Kash stepped forward, so he partially covered me, and raised his palms. “We’re not here to fight. We need to speak to you.”
But Payne’s gaze wasn’t on Kash or Larkin, despite the fact he was a strange-looking cat man. I mean, that would be where I’d have expected him to look. No. Payne’s gray eyes were fixed on me.
“Who are you?” he asked.
I stepped around Kash. The smile wobbled on my face. “Hello, Payne. My name’s Indigo, and I’m your daughter.”
* * *
Payne stared at me unblinkingly for a long beat. “I only have one daughter. Her name is Trinity.”
“No.” I kept my tone calm and rational. “Trinity isn’t your daughter, and this place, Lunar Creek, isn’t your home. I know it sounds crazy, but you don’t belong here. You’re not from this reality. You’re from mine, and I’ve come to take you home.”
“Reality?” He canted his head slightly, his gaze finally slipping to Larkin. He blinked several times as if not quite believing what he was seeing. “And that thing is from your reality?”
“That thing has a name,” Larkin snapped. “You were so much politer before the weavers stripped your memories.”
Payne took a careful step back. “Riiight.”
He was about to bolt. “Please.” I held out a hand. “Payne. Just stop and feel. Reach down inside yourself and feel what I’m saying. Does this place really feel like home? Look at me. Don’t you feel like you know me?”
He scanned my face. “This is insane.”
“Yes, it is. But it’s true. We only just found each other, and then the weavers took you away from me, and—”
The door opened. “Dad, you better not have eaten all that piz—” Trinity entered the room and froze. “Who the fuck are you?”
This close, there was no denying her beauty or the aura of self-assuredness that rolled off her. The way her body tensed, ready to fight, reminded me of myself. Yeah, it made sense why they’d picked this life for Payne.
“Honey,” Payne said. “It’s okay. I don’t think they want to hurt me.”
Trinity stepped closer to Payne, her suspicious gaze on me. “Who are you?”
No point beating around the bush. “My name is Indigo, and I’m Payne’s real daughter.” There was no keeping the possessiveness out of my voice.
Her lip curled. “This some kind of joke?”
“No. And this isn’t about you. This is between me and Payne. He doesn’t belong here. He belongs with me. He needs to come home.”
“He is home,” Trinity snapped. “Whatever you’re selling, we’re not buying.”
I ignored her and focused on Payne. “They’ve put you here and given you new memories, some of which echo the ones from home. The daughter you didn’t know you had and then found again. That connection, those feelings … The road trip… That was all us.” My eyes pricked. “Please … you have to remember. You have to believe me.”
Payne was staring at me, devouring me with his eyes. “I feel like I know you.”
Hope flared inside me. “Yes, you do.”
“Bullshit,” Trinity snapped. “This is a mind trick. What are you?” She stepped between us, into Payne’s line of sight, cutting me off from him.
Anger surged in my chest, and a low growl spilled from my lips. “Back off, red. I told you, this has nothing to do with you. I came here for Payne, and I’m not leaving without him.”
Trinity withdrew twin daggers from the holster at her waist. “Yeah, well, we’ll see about that.”
“Stop.” Payne gripped her elbow. “No more bloodshed. This woman is obviously confused.” He smiled tentatively at me. “She has me mixed up with someone else.” Trinity relaxed a fraction. “You should go,” he said.
For a moment, I thought he was speaking to Trinity, then it hit me. He was asking me to leave.
“Justice,” Larkin said. “Time’s up. We must leave. Now.”
No. I couldn’t. I’d been close, so close. I’d seen it in his eyes. He’d believed me, and then she’d fucking walked in and ruined it all. I’d given up on love, decided I didn’t need it, not paternal, not maternal, not anything, but then Payne had opened his heart to me and slowly earned my trust … My love.
I loved him, and I couldn’t just leave him here.
“Indigo,” Kash said softly. “You tried.”
But my gaze was on Payne’s face, memorizing every inch of it, mapping it, even though I knew when I got back, he would be gone, not only from our world but from my memories.
I cleared my throat. “I’m sorry … I’m sorry we didn’t have more time. I’m sorry we never got to go on that road trip. I’m sorry, so fucking sorry I failed tonight.” I allowed Larkin to take my hand and Kash to wrap his arm around my waist. My vision blurred, and hot tears skated down my cheeks. “I love you, Dad.”
“Dad?” His eyes widened. “You called me Dad.”
But the world was whirling and my heart shattering as Larkin pulled us away.
Seventeen
We landed back in Larkin’s room, and I staggered away from Larkin and Kash, hands going to my chest to stem the wave of loss that was threatening to engulf me. My chest was too tight, my breathing shallow. Fuck, how could it hurt so much to lose him when I’d only had him in my life for the blink of an eye?
“Indigo?”
The voice was tentative and confused, but it was undeniably Payne.
I whirled around, latching on to his beloved face. He stood a couple of meters away, swaying slightly, his attention on me.
Larkin and Kash stood either side of him, both looking as stunned as I felt.
He was here … he was really here. But how? I took a step toward him, unsure if this was real. Afraid that if I moved too fast, he’d vanish.
“He must have latched on to us,” Larkin said softly. “It’s okay, Indigo. You did it.”
Payne took a step toward me and winced. “Oh, God, Indigo. I remember. I remember everything.”
“Dad …”
“Yes. I’m your dad.” He held out his arms, and I rushed into them.
“You came for me.” He hugged me tight, and it was like coming home. “You came to find me.”
“Of course I did.” I pulled back enough to turn my face up to his. “I love you, and I’m not willing to lose you.”
A raw sob broke from his throat, and then my cheek was pressed to his chest while he held me to him, his hand on the back of my head.
I had my dad back, but the question was, what would I need to do to keep him.
* * *
It had been two hours since Payne’s return and no sign of the weavers. We remained in the sanctuary just in case, though, and Larkin had left to do a sweep of the building. He was keeping his word about making sure we were okay, which was nice, considering I could see he was itching to leave and get back to his own world.
The idea of coming back here, to these dorms, to an absence of Larkin, was strange. He was a fixture here, the voice of reason, the cheeky little fucker.
Would his absence spark questions? Of course. But no one could pin his disappearance on me. Larkin had put the cuff key back into Brunner’s desk. When he left, his disappearance would remain a mystery.
He materialized now and nodded curtly. “No sign of weavers. Ever
The knot in my chest eased a fraction. I looked to Kash. “You should call your gran now.”
He nodded.
“Not in here,” Larkin said. “You can’t make calls from in here.”
I squeezed my dad’s hand. “I’m going to go with Kash and make sure everything is okay. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
“Okay.” He smiled up at me.
Larkin slipped us out of the room, and we found ourselves at the foot of the staircase. “I’ll stay a little longer,” Larkin said. “Payne can use the room for a few more minutes, but once I’m gone, the room will be inaccessible.”
Yeah, he was really going to leave. “Larkin … Why you? Why did the weavers bring you here? I mean … How did they even find you?”
His smile was bitter. “Because my kind has been here before. I’d been here before. A long time ago. You may have seen depictions of us, particularly in a part of the world you call Egypt.”
“The cats in Egypt,” Kash said.
Larkin shrugged. “My people taught humans a lot. We also learned a lot from humanity in our time here. I guess the weavers realized there was more to the images and the icons than a simple love of the domestic cat.”
There was silence after his revelation.
I lightly touched his sleeve. “I wish you didn’t have to go.”
He looked momentarily conflicted. “I’ve dreamed of home for so long, and now my chance is here, I must admit, I am torn. This pathetic world has grown on me.” His eyes lit up as they caressed my face. “The people here have grown on me.” He smiled and then shook himself, tail flicking as if brushing off nostalgia. “Make the call, Kash.”
Kash held his phone to his ear. “Gran, hi. Yeah, sorry … I’m not sure … I think she was upset. Honestly, it’s all a little fuzzy. No, we’re fine … Yes, I’ll be back, but Indigo got summoned to shadow cadet duty … I know, a real shame, but she’s up for coming back to visit again soon. Yes. Okay. Love you too.” He hung up. “I think we’re good.”
That was it? “She bought it.”
Kash shrugged. “It’s a powerful enchantment, a system that’s been in place for generations. There’s no reason for her to think otherwise.”
“And Payne … When he doesn’t show up on their feeds?”
“They’ll assume he left the creek for another part of that world,” Larkin said. “It’s rare, but it happens.” He looked speculative. “But you know he can’t stay here, right? There is no place for him at the Academy any longer. The safest thing for him would be to leave.”
Leave? Panic tightened my throat. “No. I only just got him back.”
Even as I said the words, I knew they were selfish. Staying here after he’d found out who I was had gotten him into this mess in the first place. If he had run when he’d discovered I was his daughter … No, I couldn’t allow him to put his life at risk again.
Kash cupped my shoulder. “It’s for the best … Just until things cool down.”
I nodded mutely. “I’ll speak to him.”
“I’ll get him,” Kash said.
He was gone for less than five seconds, and then Payne was standing in the corridor with us.
Payne took one look at my face and shook his head. “No,” he said. “I’m not leaving you.”
There was no denying the spike of joy at his words, the warmth that suffused my veins to know if he had a choice, he would stay. But that wasn’t an option. It had never been. Part of me had known all along that bringing him back didn’t mean I got to keep him with me. I’d just refused to acknowledge it.
This was going to be hard. “Yes, you are.” I crossed my arms. “You leave now so that we can be together again in the future. You know I’m right.”
He did know. It was written in the lines of sorrow on his face. He knew he couldn’t stay here, not if we wanted to save our tiny family of two.
“Indigo …” His face clouded with grief. “I don’t want to go.”
Fuck. I would not cry. “I don’t want you to go. But I’d rather you be away from me, somewhere in this world where I can find you easily, rather than transported to another reality.”
He swallowed hard. “Okay.”
My heart cracked a little.
“I’ll take you,” Larkin said to Payne. “I can drop you off wherever you want before I leave.”
Payne nodded. “Thank you.”
“Time to say goodbye,” Larkin nudged.
Fuck, this was it. They were both leaving.
Payne drew me into a hug and then kissed my forehead. “I’ll see you soon, sweetheart. I promise.”
I wanted to hold on to him and never let go. I wanted to stop time and just be his daughter for a little longer. Instead, I released him reluctantly and plastered a smile on my face, one that said, this is not the end. One that said … “I’ll see you soon, Dad. Be safe. Please.”
He smiled. “I’m so proud of you, Indigo. I’m so proud to call you my daughter.”
Larkin gripped my dad’s arm, and then they were gone.
* * *
I’d never been the needy kind, but Payne’s absence was like a hole in my heart. If Brady had been here, I’d have curled up in his arms, and he’d have made me cocoa. If Hyde had been here, he would have sat with me and counseled me with wise words of comfort.
But they weren’t here. They’d been called away. I wasn’t alone, though. Kash had stayed, insistent that he would remain with me that night. We’d retreated from the shadow cadet dorms to the weaver ones. His reasoning—the bed was bigger, and he had an ensuite bathroom. Why the thought of sharing a bed with Kash didn’t faze me should have worried me. But I was too emotionally exhausted to dwell on it. All I knew was being alone tonight made me want to scream.
While Kash retreated into the shower, I kicked off my boots, stretched out on his bed, and closed my eyes. He was right, this bed was comfortable, so very comfortable …
A drop of water fell on my cheek, and I opened my eyes to find Kash hovering over me, his hair wet and his scent peachy and strong.
“You smell good.” My voice was hoarse from sleep, thoughts unguarded. “Peach shower gel too?” His lips looked soft and glistened slightly. “Peach lip balm again?”
He ran his thumb across his bottom lip and then held it to my lips. “Want to taste?”
This was the moment to turn my head away, to make a joke, but he was so close, and there was no denying the lick of heat in my belly or the electricity that jumped between us. It was a tugging sensation, urging me to let go. To just go with it.
I parted my lips in invitation.
His breath caught, and then he pressed his thumb into my mouth. I latched on, sucking and tasting the sweet balm. His eyes darkened and his breathing quickened, and my stomach flipped hard at his response. More. I swirled my tongue around the pad of his thumb, eliciting a moan that had my pulse racing. He covered my body with his half-naked one, clad only in loose joggers, and we sank into the mattress together. I cocked a knee and parted my thighs, allowing him to settle against me. He fit right, the hard planes of his body molding to mine as if we were meant to be, his slender hips perfectly aligned with mine. He was aroused, and every throb sent lances of need through me.
“Indigo …” He slid his thumb from my lips and replaced it with his mouth.
His lips were firm but soft, peachy and delicious, his tongue tasted minty as it wrestled with mine. I weaved my fingers through his thick, silky hair and made a fist, angling his head to deepen the kiss. We ground our hips together, slick wetness against the hard length of his cock. The friction, the angle, everything was working to drive me toward the edge. A roaring buzz filled my head, and then I was floating.
The weave glimmered far away.
What the fuck?
“Indigo?” I turned to see Kash. He was ethereal, glowing, and beautiful. “What’s happening?”
“I don’t know.”
Our threads bobbed side by side, getting closer and closer, and then they touched.
Sensation ripped through me, sharp and electric. And then I was back on the bed with Kash on top of me, our mouths fused in a deep kiss and our bodies joined through the fabric of our clothes as an orgasm took us. I swallowed Kash’s guttural moan, and then his hips jerked as he came. His abandon was like a spur to mine, and a breathless cry caught in my throat as I tumbled into bliss with him.
We kissed as our bodies shuddered and flexed in the aftermath, softer, gentler. Tasting, nipping, licking.
Kash broke the kiss, laced his fingers through mine, and brought my arms up above my head. He locked gazes with me, his soft and questioning, and then he kissed me again. Slow, tentative, and sweet. My chest felt tight and full. Oh, God. This was so good but sooo bad at the same time. This was the beginning of another fall, one that involved my heart. How could I handle this on top of everything else? How could I feel this connection to him so soon and so intensely?
The weave, it had to be …
He pulled back a little, enough to look into my eyes but still have his breath graze my lips. “The weave … We were there together. That doesn’t happen. It’s not normal. Our threads touching like that …” He blew out a soft breath as if recalling and reveling in the feeling.
“There’s nothing normal about me, Kash.”
“No, Justice, you’re extraordinary. You make me feel things … Want things.” His gaze dropped to my mouth for a second. “I know you have a thing for the big guy in the shadow cadets—the second year, Brady.”
Surprise had a sobering effect. “You do?”
He looked sheepish. “I did some digging.”
“Why?”
“Dumb question, Justice.”
Oh … right.
“But you’re a weaver now,” he continued, “and monogamy isn’t necessary for our women. So, I was wondering … Indigo Justice … will you be my girlfriend for real?”
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