“I will, don’t worry.”
Sitting on the edge of the bed, I slide the heels on, and fasten the strap on the side. They make my legs look long and awesome. “These are so cute. Did I pick them out?” I ask looking to Edgar.
“You did. You said you wanted them.”
“Oh yeah, I remember.” I don’t, but that doesn’t matter. Standing, I find my balance. It’s actually pretty easy. I wobble a bit, but once I get the hang of them, I’m okay. “Are we going to your party now?” I ask, ever so keen.
“Yes, we are.”
We head out, and once we get to the front desk, the hamburger guy looks up at us. He can’t take his eyes off me. “How much?” he asks Edgar.
“How much for what?” I ask.
“Nothing, kitty. Just keeping walking.” He shakes his head at hamburger guy and tightens his hold on my upper arm.
We get into the car, and Edgar pours himself a drink. “Can I have one?” I ask.
“No, but you can have some water.” He opens a bottle of water and offers it to me.
“I’m not thirsty,” I say. “But I would like a bit more of that pipe.” I flutter my eye lids to him.
“No, that’s enough for now. I need you awake, not overdosed.”
“You’re no fun.” I sit back and cross my arms in front of my chest, pouting like an infant who’s about to throw a tantrum. “I’m not going to overdose, because I don’t have a problem,” I reply with considerable snark.
“I’ll give you some when we get to the party. And while we’re there, you can have as much as you want.”
A smile spreads across my face. Yay! “Okay.”
Leaning my head back against the leather seat, I close my eyes and look forward to an awesome night.
“A promise is a promise. Here you go, kitty. Now, promise you’ll come back to me when you want some more.”
I open my eyes to see Edgar offering me the pipe. “I will,” I say before guiding the pipe toward my lips.
“Good girl.”
Once I’ve gotten the highest I’ve ever flown before, Edgar opens my door and takes my hand. “Wow, you gave me more than normal.”
“I want you super relaxed for this. Just have a lot of fun. And do whatever you feel like doing.”
“Whatever?” I waggle my eyebrows at him. “Or should I say… whoever?” I laugh at my joke. But this is real, I’m so turned on right now, I think that if Edgar just touched me, I’d be exploding with pleasure.
“Whoever, and whatever.”
I look at the house. It’s not as big as the one from that other party we went to, but it’s still pretty big. It’s nice and neat on the outside, with gray siding, and big white windows. There’s another four cars here, and a big black people mover too. “There’s not many people,” I say looking at the cars.
“This is a more intimate party,” Edgar says and gives me a kiss on the cheek. “Now, you can take off the shirt if you want.” I unbutton the shirt, and he takes it from me, slinging it over his arm. “I love you, Hannah,” he says. This makes me smile even more.
The door opens, and we’re greeted by a really handsome man. He’s older, maybe in his early thirties, and he’s wearing just jeans with no shirt. His chest is rippled with muscles, and he has a tattoo over his heart. “Cute tattoo,” I say as I reach out to touch it.
“You’re friendly.” He looks to Edgar, “This’ll work well.” He gives Edgar a small nod.
I don’t know what’s happening, all I know is I’m super horny and I can’t wait to get Edgar alone. Hell, even in front of everyone. I don’t mind.
“This way,” Edgar says as he takes me by the hand and leads me toward the back of the house.
At the back, there’s a huge open room, with a heap of cameras set up. All of them are pointing in different directions. There’s a sofa, and beside it, over a bit further, there’s a giant bed that’s made up to look all pretty with pink and white bedding. There’s also a fake kitchen with a dining room table and chairs. “Oh!” I say as I gravitate toward the pink fluffy bed. “What’s happening here?” I jump on the bed, and giggle as one of the pillow ruffles tickles my nose.
“We’ve got a few friends coming over, I hope that’s okay?” the guy who answered the door says.
“Yes! I love making new friends,” I say. “Do you have a pool?” I sit up in bed and cross my legs.
His eyes go directly down between my legs. “Nice,” he says and turns to Edgar smiling. “She’ll do really nicely.”
“I told you,” Edgar proudly responds.
“You told him what?” I ask Edgar.
“I told him how pretty you are.”
“Thank you.”
Just then, another girl walks in. She’s got long blonde hair, and she’s wearing only a tiny thong. She’s got nicer boobs than me, and I feel like I’m ordinary in comparison to her. A guy walks in behind her. He looks scary. I don’t like him. But I like her. She’s pretty, much prettier than me.
The guy and Edgar shake hands, and she walks over to me. “Hey,” she says in a bit of a slur. She touches my hair, then gently strokes her hand down my face.
“Hi. I’m Hannah. You’ve got such nice boobs.” I reach up to feel them.
“They were a present from Charles.” She points to the guy she came with. “He wanted me to get them, so I did.” She leans down and her blonde hair falls into my face, it smells so nice. “He paid for them.” She starts to laugh.
I can’t help but start laughing too.
“Okay, girls,” the guy who answered the door starts. Both me and the other girl turn to stare at him. “Ginger, this is Hannah, Hannah this is Ginger. And I’m Nate. There are a few more people coming a bit later on, but for now, why don’t we get to know each other?”
“Edgar,” I call.
He’s standing by the sidelines watching. “What is it?”
I just smile at him. “I love you,” I say.
“I love you so much it hurts.” The smile on his face tells me this is true love. “Will you get to know our new friends?” I nod my head eagerly. “Do you want a bit more?” He’s already taking the pipe out of his pocket.
I want to say yes, but I’m not feeling like I should have any more right now. “Not yet.”
“Okay, it’s here for you when you want some.”
“Can I have some?” the girl asks.
“Ginger, you’ve already had yours. Don’t be greedy,” Charles says.
“Yes, sir.” She smiles at him like she’s seen the first rainbow of the year.
“I’ll give you something else a little bit later.”
“Okay.” She turns back to me, and starts playing with my hair. “Have you ever done heroin?” she asks me. While gently dragging her fingers through my hair.
“No way. I don’t want needles. That’s too hardcore for me.” It’s all over if I start doing needles. “Besides, I don’t like needles. They’re scary.”
“Oh, my God, you should try it! It’s the best feeling ever.” I look at her arms, and notice the lack of track marks. She notices me looking and says, “Charles doesn’t let me inject on my arms. I have to do it between my toes. It’s different.”
A small moment of clarity beams through so forcefully that I actually pull back from what’s happening. For a second, a moment in time, I turn to look at Edgar who’s talking to Charles. He gazes at me, and notices something different in me. “What’s wrong?” he asks as he comes over and sits beside me on the bed.
“What’s happening here?” My high is beginning to crash, and fast. I’m hurtling toward rock bottom, somewhere I don’t like.
“We were invited over to hang out with some new friends.”
I look at the girl, Ginger, and notice she’s kinda high. “But what am I supposed to do here?” What is happening inside my head? A whirlwind of emotions is taking over. “Why am I here?” I stand from the bed. Confusion is the strongest of emotions coming through.
“Kitty, come here.” H
e hugs me close to his chest. This feels so nice. “I know what you need.” One hand falls away from the small of my back. It disappears into his suit pocket, and he brings out the pipe. “This’ll make you feel better.”
“What? No, it won’t.” Just have a bit, you just need a small amount and you’ll feel heaps better.
“Not even a little bit. Look.” He shakes a crumb of a rock into it. “It’s not a lot, just enough to take the edge off. You’re nervous about making new friends. That’s all this is.”
Oh yeah, that’s it. Makes sense. “I don’t know,” I say skeptically. He’s right, it’s just that I don’t know who Ginger is, and her boyfriend doesn’t look very nice. “He scares me,” I whisper to Edgar about Charles.
“Oh, kitty. Charles and I have been friends for years. He won’t hurt you.”
I peer around his shoulder to Charles, who smiles as he’s staring at me. “You sure?” I ask.
“Here, let me introduce you.” Edgar turns me around, and Charles hasn’t moved. “Charles, this is the love of my life, Hannah. You’re not allowed to hurt her, or you’ll have me to deal with.”
Charles does a double-take toward Edgar, then nods and smiles. “I wouldn’t dream of messing with your number one girl.”
“See, kitty. He won’t touch you, ‘cause he’s too scared of me.”
“That’s right,” Charles echoes from behind. “Besides, I know how much he loves you.”
Everything settles down, and I feel happy knowing Edgar’s always going to protect me. God, I love him so much. “Okay,” I say in a small voice.
“Now, you know what would make me so happy?” Edgar says in a kind and gentle voice.
“What?”
“If you have a little bit of this and go over there and talk to Ginger and Nate. There’s also going to be someone over there taking some pictures. Is that okay with you?”
Awww, he’s asking my permission. How sweet. “Will it make you happy if I do what you want?”
“It’ll make me so happy that I’ll stay with you tonight.”
“You will?” I ask with so much enthusiasm. “Do you promise?”
“Of course, I promise. I love you so much, Hannah.” He offers the pipe again. This time, I take it and smoke it. “You’re such a good girl. Now, Nate, why don’t you come over here and make Hannah feel comfortable?” Edgar offers my hand to Nate. He saunters over to me, the top of his jeans are unbuttoned. There’s a small trail of hair leading down beneath the jeans.
“You sure are beautiful, Hannah. Ginger was just telling me how gorgeous she thinks you are.”
“Really? I’m ordinary compared to her.”
He leans down, and whispers in my ear, “But she’s a junkie. You’re not and that makes you so much more desirable than her.”
Something inside me snaps. My erotic need takes over. All my nerve endings spark alight, my heartbeat increases, and I become the wanton girl I love being. I push him down on the bed, undo his zip and pull his jeans all the way down. Straddling his hips, I sink down on him.
Ginger, moves so she’s over his face, and we begin to kiss.
Yeah baby, this is what the pipe feels like.
Bliss.
Chapter 17
The days have blurred together, and I’m not sure what day it is. Or month. I have no idea.
I open my eyes, and a hunger burns inside me from the moment I wake. I know Edgar said he’ll be here early today, because he has another party for us to go to. I hope he’ll be here soon, because I need the pipe.
Scrubbing my hand over my face, I go to the bathroom to take a shower. Hopefully, that’ll wake me up a bit. Turning the water on, I feel for the temperature. It’s hot against my skin. Man, I feel like crap.
Once finished, I go over to brush my teeth. Edgar told me my mouth has been stinking really bad, so he hasn’t been kissing me. I want to try and not have bad breath, so I’ve been brushing as often as I can. Looking in the mirror, I notice how my face is covered in acne. I’ve never had so many pimples in my life. Even before I get my period. I’ve never had such horrible skin. I don’t get why.
My face is starting to look gaunt too. My eyes have sunken in, and my angry skin does nothing for my looks. Because I’ve lost a ton of weight, I can now fit into size zero clothes. Not that I like clothes. They scratch against my skin. I’d rather be naked then have something on me.
I finish looking at my ugly face, and go to sit on the bed.
My stomach is hurting. My lungs feel like they’re about to collapse and I catch myself shaking. God, I hope he hurries up.
I get up and start pacing. I don’t have a key, so I can’t even go outside without locking myself out of the room. “Screw it,” I say to myself.
Getting dressed in some tracksuit pants, and a t-shirt, I slip on my runners and head out the door. I know Edgar will be here soon, so no use in trying to prop it open.
I hurry past the guy at the front desk, the fat one, and try to look as inconspicuous as possible. “Hey,” he says as I start to run. “You know he won’t be happy,” he calls after me.
I turn and give him the finger.
When I’ve run as fast as my legs can carry me, I find myself out on the busy thoroughfare. There are a few stores lining the road, nothing too fancy. A corner store, a laundry, and a few small burger places.
My stomach rumbles, but the blood pulsating through my veins has a bigger thirst. Something I can’t legally buy. Problem is, even if I could buy it, I don’t have any money. Edgar doesn’t give me any, and I’ve never really thought to ask. I suppose I better ask him for some, in case I need it. Like now.
I want both food and the pipe. The pipe more.
I walk along the street, trying to think how to get money so I can buy some… things. I can’t call my parents, because I don’t even know where my phone is, I can’t remember bringing it with me. I don’t know, that’s all kinda hazy. I don’t have anything I can sell at a pawn store, the only things I can do is either steal or sell myself, and neither of those are an attractive option.
I walk past the corner store and look inside. They have some fresh fruit, like bananas, apples, and oranges. It’s not busy, which means I can’t waltz in and try to take one. I turn around, and stare inside.
I’m really hungry.
“Ugh,” I mumble to myself. I don’t want to steal. But, I might have to. I don’t know how long it’s going to be before I see Edgar for some food, or the pipe.
“Hannah, is that you?” I turn toward the deep voice, and a police officer is standing in front of me.
“Yeah, who’s asking?” I snap.
“I met you a few weeks back, just over there. Remember?” He steps closer, and I back up.
I stare at him for a moment, then another, before I begin to piece together the blurred memory of meeting him. “Oh yeah, um… Marvin?”
“Close, Martin.” His suspicious eyes cast a gaze down my body, then back up. “Are you okay?” he asks. “You look like something’s bothering you.”
Duh, Einstein. I need the pipe. “I’m just a bit hungry.” I rub my hand up and down my arm. My skin hurts. How’s that possible? For your skin to physically ache. It’s so tender, that touching it is making me hold in the screams.
“Do you need something to eat?” He steps closer.
“I just need some money to buy food.” Yes, maybe I can get enough from him to buy some rocks. Yes!
His skepticism doesn’t ease up. He’s still staring at me. Just give me the damn money already. “Let’s go buy you something to eat.” He steps closer to me as if he’s going to walk me somewhere.
“No, it’s okay. I’m sure you’re busy. If you give me the money, I’ll go buy something.” Come on, buddy. Take the hint.
“Hannah, I’m not handing over the cash I’ve worked hard for so you can go and smoke it, or inject it. I’ll buy you something to eat, but I’m not supporting your drug habit.”
I laugh out loud. “Goes to show what a
great cop you are, because I don’t have a drug habit.”
“Really?” he says as he places his hands to his hips in an intimidating stance.
For a second, I retreat into myself. But I don’t have a drug habit. I don’t have a problem. “Yes, really.” I mimic his stand.
“Is that why you’re virtually a skeleton? Your skin looks infected. Your hair is mousey and limp, and your eyes have no sparkle to them. Is that because you’re not an addict? I can help you, Hannah. Get you the help you need.”
I laugh again. “You’re a joke.” I shake my head at him. “You think you know me. Well guess what? I don’t have an addiction. I’m just hungry.” I step closer to him.
“You’re a drug addict. In just the few weeks since I first saw you, you now look like death warmed over.”
“I’m not a drug addict!” this time I scream it so loud, it brings attention to us by the few passing pedestrians.
“Do your parents know where you are? I’m sure they’re sick with worry.”
“You wanna save the world? Start with someone who needs saving. I’m fine.” I turn on my heel, wanting to get out of here.
My hunger is increasing. And I can feel myself slipping into emotions I don’t want to feel. Martin’s making me mad, and without the pipe, I can’t cope with what he’s saying.
“Hannah,” he calls and grabs my upper arm. Turning, I make my hand into a fist, and smash him on the chin. I don’t even know what came over me, but I just hit a police officer. Before I can get my head around what’s happening, he’s got me in handcuffs and is reading me my rights.
“What are you doing?” I shriek at him. There’s a crowd gathering which makes my blood boil. “Let me go!”
He’s pushing me down the road and from one of the stores, his partner comes out. “What did this one do?” he asks with a short, yet impassive tone.
“She hit me.”
“Assaulting a police officer. I see a jail stay in her future,” the other one says with a smirk.
“I won’t do it again. I’m sorry. I’m just hungry… I don’t know what came over me,” I beg for leniency. “Please. Please. I’ll just go back to my room.”
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