I Take It Back

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I Take It Back Page 25

by Liza James


  As quickly as that relief came, though, it was gone when I noticed that Cade had stopped his last hit mid-air. He was completely still with his eyes stuck straight ahead of him, staring at something or someone a few feet away.

  A large man in a black hooded sweater was crouched at eye level in front of him, meeting his gaze dead on. Cade’s breathing was growing more rapid, his shoulders erratically sliding up and down, but he didn’t say a word.

  “Cade!” I shouted, trying to break him free of whatever trance he was in. But he didn’t even glance my way. His eyes flickered for a split second, but it felt like he fought the urge to look at me. Instead, he gave way as Devon took the advantage and flipped him over on his back.

  “Oh shit.” Logan’s voice barely registered behind me as full-blown panic surged through my body. My lungs expanded, my chest tightened up, and all of a sudden the ability to breathe became impossible.

  “Little bitch.” Devon threw his fist down, smashing Cade’s face the second he got the chance, and I watched as his head lulled back and forth in a slow, lazy way that had my heart stopping. He threw another punch, hitting Cade in the same spot, splattering more blood across the floor and up onto his own face.

  And then another hit.

  And another.

  I yanked my arm free of Savannah’s grasp and pushed my way forward, lunging toward the fight in hopes that I could somehow pull Devon off of Cade. But Logan beat me to it, shoving me behind him as he stepped ahead and all but plowed Devon into the ground. Ryan was next, rushing to Cade’s side and wiping a white rag across his face. While Ryan tried to clean Cade up enough that he could see, he was lightly tapping his cheek and words were rushing out of his mouth.

  Realizing he was unconscious, I ran forward and fell to my knees next to Cade’s face. I couldn’t contain the hot tears that fell from my eyes as I took in his condition. One eye was already completely swollen to the point that it wouldn’t open. His lip was split in half, spilling blood that was mixing in a pool with what was falling from his nose.

  “Cade, hey, Cade. Come on, wake up. Please, wake up.” I placed my hands on either side of his face, urging him awake with my words as my tears fell and mixed with his blood on the ground below us.

  But nothing, no response came, and as my eyes swept across his body, I noted how tense and strained his muscles were under his clothes. Even in this state of unconsciousness, he was stiff and unrelaxed. I glanced up and my eyes met with the man who had been crouched in front of Cade during the fight. He showed nothing on his face, no expression except emptiness and maybe a flicker of disappointment.

  I felt it before I knew it, but Cade’s face slowly turned toward my hand as he began regaining consciousness. Looking back down at him, a rush of realization hit me all at once. That man and Cade had such similar features. Both of them had strong, sharp jawlines. Both had the same dark, chestnut-colored hair. Those eyes, though, that was what confirmed it. They both had the same bright, cobalt blue eyes that bore straight through you.

  That icy, revolting feeling I only got when I was around Tyler creeped up my spine as I turned back up toward the man in front of us, back down at Cade and then back up once more before I spoke.

  “You must be his father.”

  Chapter 47

  At first, the man didn’t respond. Instead, he stared down at his son, his eyes lit with something so cold that I couldn’t decipher it. After a brief moment, his eyes met mine again and he finally spoke.

  “Tell him I’ll be waiting outside.”

  And that was it. His rough, low voice was practically a growl as it left his lips. Instinctually, I felt every single red flag alert in my brain, telling me we needed to get Cade out of here before things got out of hand.

  My mind traced back to a previous conversation I had with Cade back when we were at the ski lodge. He had confided in me about his past with his parents, with his father and what he had to endure growing up. Pain ignited in my chest as I brought my hand across Cade’s bruised and swollen cheek. I leaned down, pressing my forehead against his when hot tears fell from my eyes and landed on his skin.

  His hand was slow and steady as he brought it up to the back of my neck, pulling me tightly against him. I couldn’t help but notice that even when Cade was at a weak, vulnerable place, he was still the strongest man I had ever met.

  “I’m alright, Bambi. I’m okay,” he whispered against my ear. His voice was low and husky, tinted with pain but staying steady.

  I didn’t realize how much I was actually crying until that moment. He lifted both of his strong, heavy arms and wrapped them around my waist, anchoring me to him, to this place, to this moment. It was such a simple gesture, but it was then that I felt the halting realization that he was it for me. He had already ruined any other relationship I could ever possibly have in the future. Nothing would ever compare to Cade, to this moment, or the moments we had already shared together. The reality was that he was still protecting me, even while he was the one who was hurt. Even at his weakest, he was strongest for me. Suddenly, I felt my body relax and lay still as I fought to pull my emotions together, embracing an odd sense of peace in this chaotic situation.

  I lifted myself up, parting us and reaching to grasp his upper arm in an attempt to lift him from the floor. My fingers barely covered the expanse of his bicep and I felt the muscles tense under my touch as he moved with me.

  Logan was instantly by his side, catching his weight and lifting him from the ground with his own strength. Cade leaned against him for support while I pulled his other arm around my shoulder, the two of us leading Cade out of the building with Savannah right by our side.

  The crowd parted around us and I quickly surveyed the area for any sign of Devon, but he was nowhere to be found. A moment of worry crossed my mind, no doubt that this wasn’t over between the two of them. I felt it in my skin and bones as we moved through the drunken haze of bodies. Some people were encouraging Cade, reassuring him and sympathizing with what had happened. Others, however, were cursing and yelling crude names, things that would have easily been brushed off before this fight but were now weighing on Cade like a lead blanket. His body was stiff in between mine and Logan’s, pulled back as he tried to handle his own weight as much as possible. He wasn’t fighting our hold by any means, but he didn’t want to be carried out either.

  We made our way back through the abandoned building, stepping through the dark hallways and out of that blocked doorway. Once the nightly fresh air hit us, I took a breath and felt part of the tension leave my body. I took a second breath, even deeper than the first when I realized we were all practically alone aside from the couple of bodies who were moving to their vehicles as well. Thankfully, everyone hadn’t started leaving the building yet, so we beat the crowd in that regard.

  We walked in silence as we made our way through the debris that littered the ground. Along with the broken glass, shingles and various scattered boards, there were liquor bottles and red solo cups interspersed.

  Cade was moving a bit easier now, his muscles and body having loosened up and started recovering quickly. But as we neared Logan’s Jeep, I felt Cade’s body lurch straight up, stopping mid-step when he dropped his arms from both myself and Logan’s shoulders.

  There was a huge figure in front of us, leaning against a brand new Range Rover that was parked next to our ride. His arms were crossed tightly around his chest, his eyes gravely dark and locked straight onto Cade’s. His father didn’t say a word, but his silence was loud enough to pierce my ears and ignite a ringing warning in my head.

  “Go home with Logan and Savannah.”

  At first, I didn’t recognize the voice that had spoken those words. It was hard, empty of any emotion and quiet, but no less effective. However, when no one said anything else and Cade’s father hadn’t moved an inch, I looked around to see who was supposedly leaving. Lifting my head up, I met Cade’s eyes flush with my own. But the expression staring back at me wasn’t anything I r
ecognized from him.

  “What? No, I need to make sure you’re okay. You’re seriously injured Cade, we need to—”

  “Go. Home. You heard what I said. I’m not saying it again.” At this, he stepped away from me, coming to face directly in front of us and blocking the view of his father.

  “Cade, come on man. You don’t have—” Logan cut in, stepping forward, but was immediately cut off when Cade’s fist landed heavily in the center of his chest, blocking any further movement.

  Cade’s eyes didn’t leave mine when he responded to Logan.

  “Take her home. I’m not fucking around. I don’t want her here.”

  Originating in the center of my chest, a blanket of fire engulfed my skin, reaching out and inching through every part of my body. His words struck me like an arrow straight into my gut. He never spoke to me like that, without any kind of emotion or connection. Anger began boiling up inside of me as I refused to believe that I didn’t know exactly who was standing in front of me.

  “Come with us. We’ll come back for your car tomorrow. Come with me, Cade. Please.” I couldn’t decide which emotion was taking precedence. Anger, confusion, or hurt. I was beyond pissed at this entire scenario. The fact that his dad had showed up, caused Cade to lose focus during the fight, and the fact that he was coming between us in this moment. I was confused as to who I was actually talking to because it sure as hell wasn’t Cade. Hurt didn’t even come close to what I was feeling right now either.

  “No. Now leave, you knew this wasn’t going to work out anyway. I don’t want another fan girl, got plenty of those keeping me busy already, sweetheart.” At this, a sadistic smile spread across his face. His lips curled up in a grin as I stumbled backward. He actually fucking winked to top it off.

  “Excuse me?” I put one hand up, warding off anything else. I couldn’t listen to whatever this bullshit was.

  “Okay okay, let’s just get out of here, Em. He obviously hit the ground a little too hard.” Logan stepped in, reaching forward and putting out his hand for me to take it. I glanced at Savannah and realized she was as shocked as I was, her skin pale as her eyes jumped back and forth between each of us.

  “No, fuck no. You’re kidding me, right? You’ve got to be fucking kid—”

  “I’m not fucking kidding. Get the hell out of here, go back to your perfect, boring life, with your perfect best friend and your perfect parents. Oh wait, you don’t actually have those, do you?”

  Crack.

  My fist exploded in pain as it smashed across Cade’s jaw. His head whipped back, probably more from shock than actual pain, though. His hand came up as he scrubbed his face and for a split second I thought I saw a flicker of hurt cross his face. But it was gone just as quickly, and that disgusting smile came into play once again.

  “Fuck. You. Don’t you dare throw that in my face. I’m not doing this again, you fucking prick. You get that? If this is it, I’m done, Cade.” I felt the words spill out of my mouth like toxic waste. Stinging my lips and burning my throat as I choked them out. Tears threatened to fill my eyes but I forced them back. No way in hell was I letting this moment be tainted with any sort of fragility. I don’t care how angry Cade may be, how hard he may have hit his head, or who the hell his father was. He knew what those words would mean to me and he said them intentionally.

  God, how had I been such an idiot these last few months?

  Cade didn’t say a word. He simply let that evil grin do the talking, and then I heard the quiet chuckle of the man standing behind him.

  Wow, what a pair those two were together. Good to know.

  Savannah’s hand filled mine, pulling me along and past Cade. He didn’t look my way again, didn’t even glance in my direction. He easily turned on his heel, walked toward his car while his dad moved to the passenger side and got in before driving away.

  The second my door shut, everything came to the surface at once. My shoulders began trembling, my breathing went haywire and my lungs seized up on me. I couldn’t breathe, my vision started tunneling and I could vaguely hear Savannah’s voice rushing around me as her hands landed on either side of my face.

  I looked up, my eyes meeting hers as I searched for answers, willing them to come to me in any possible way. I needed some sort of explanation as to what just happened. Anything at all to get me through this. Even if Cade hadn’t wanted me around his father, hadn’t wanted me to meet him, he never would have brought up my parents. No way. This was different and way too final.

  “Wh-what happened? What’s ha-happening?”

  Was that my voice? I couldn’t recognize it through the stuttered sobs. I also couldn’t understand one damn thing Savannah was saying, or if Logan was talking. I couldn’t comprehend any of it. I couldn’t get any solid breaths, I couldn’t see through the tears and the only connection to anything I could make was how in this exact moment, I was losing someone important to me all over again. Maybe not by death his time, no. But Cade was gone from me in a way that I could never have back.

  And that alone had me reliving the loss of my parents and my love all at the same time.

  Logan was pulling out of the parking lot, rushing to get us home and away from this place that would no doubt haunt my dreams in my sleep.

  Chapter 48

  The next morning, I woke up in an exhausted haze. As everything came rushing back to me from the night before, I struggled to differentiate what was hopefully a terrible nightmare to what was reality. Unfortunately, I quickly realized just how real that nightmare was.

  Cade and I were over. Done. Definitely not on talking terms.

  The things he had said, the way he brought up the accident? I still couldn’t believe it had actually happened.

  Lifting my head from the pillow, everything swayed and, as I brought my hand up to rub my eyes, I felt the salty residue left behind from a night crammed with tears. My head was heavy and throbbing while my nose ran and don’t even get me started on the disaster of my hair.

  I was a literal hot mess.

  I ran my fingers in hard circles across my temples, trying to massage out some of the tension, but it was no use. So, I stood up, noticed I was still in my dirty clothes from last night, and didn’t even care as I walked out of my room to pour myself a cup of coffee. Willing myself to walk in a straight line, I reached out for the counter to steady myself.

  I forced a few sturdy blinks in order to clear my vision, when I felt two sets of anxious eyes resting on me from behind. I turned around and instantly had to fight back tears at the sight of Savannah and Logan’s faces. Both of them looked concerned, with Savannah rubbing incessant circles in the back of Logan’s hand with her thumb.

  “I’ll live you guys. Stop worrying,” I mumbled, my teeth gritting and forcing the words out of my mouth. Even as I said them I felt the tight ball of pain begin forming in my chest. Instinctually, I placed my hand on my heart, sliding back and forth as I tried to ease some of the pressure with my palm.

  “Oh Em. I’m so sorry.” Savannah was off her feet and racing toward me in a heartbeat. Her arms flew around my shoulders and forced me backward as her embrace attempted spreading some of her warmth into my cold, aching body. But it did nothing surprisingly, or maybe not surprising. I felt hollow on the inside, like a significant piece of my body had been removed without warning.

  Looking over her shoulder, I noticed Logan rubbing his eyes with one hand. He looked exhausted, with dark circles under his eyes and his shaggy blond hair a mess. It had been growing out a bit over the last month or so and actually seemed to suit him better the longer it became. His phone was resting in his other hand, illuminated by whatever he was looking at previously.

  “Have you heard from him?” I asked tentatively. I honestly wasn’t sure if I even wanted to know the answer to that.

  Logan looked up at me, his worried eyes meeting mine. Though he was silent, his expression and eyes said everything I needed to know. Whether he had or hadn’t heard from him yet, either wa
y was bad news.

  “A bit. He’s being super short and not willing to talk about anything. He’s completely thrown up a wall and not evening letting me through it.”

  I removed myself from Savannah’s grasp and continued making my own cup of coffee.

  Extra cream and sugar today, thank you very much.

  “I just don’t get it. I refuse to believe that everything we’ve been through has been a total lie. There’s no way. No fucking way.” I shook my head without meeting either of their faces. As hurt as I was by all of this, I was also completely humiliated. Unfounded humiliation, I know. But when the guy you suddenly realized you loved, dumped you like you meant absolutely nothing in front of his family and your best friend?

  Total embarrassment.

  “No, I don’t think it was fake at all. I really don’t.” Logan went suddenly quiet, darting his eyes to the ground and cracking his knuckles as if he wanted to say more.

  “What is it, Logan? Seriously, spit it out.” Savannah stepped toward him and resumed her seat on the couch, taking his hand in hers and urging him to continue speaking.

  “It’s just that, you guys weren’t there when we were growing up. His dad ... his family. It was bad.” He glanced up at us and back down at the floor again. His heel began tapping rapidly into the floor as if he was worried that he was sharing too much.

  “I know about his dad and him fighting if that’s what you’re referring to. He told me about that part of his youth.” My words were quiet as we treaded into the darker territory of someone who meant so much to each of us.

  Logan look surprised at my revelation, the fact that I knew anything at all was shocking.

 

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