by Annie Rains
Va-dup. Va-dup. Va-dup.
A cold sweat broke on his forehead. He couldn’t remove his gaze from the machine. Even though he’d been forcing himself to watch videos of helicopters for the last week, seeing the real thing was a different story. What if it went down and he needed to run? Which way would he go? What if it crashed into the training building? There’d be casualties. He’d need to help with the rescue efforts.
Va-dup. Va-dup.
Flashes of his last time in the sky—last time being conscious at least—crossed his mind. Those last few seconds had seemed like eternity. There’d been a million voices all screaming and barking orders at once. Then there’d been nothing. Just silence and a heart-crushing awareness of death.
Va-dup. Va-dup. Va-dup.
Lawson jumped as someone grabbed his shoulder from behind. He whirled on his feet.
“Whoa, man. It’s just me.” Micah leveled him with a gaze. “You all right?”
The sound of the helicopter faded into the background.
“Yeah.” Lawson exhaled and offered a halfhearted laugh. “Sorry. You caught me off guard.” Similar to the way he’d done to Julie the other night. What was her crash and burn story, he wondered, knowing she had one.
“You were watching the helicopter,” Micah said.
Lawson nodded. “Yeah. I miss being up there.” He glanced at Micah. “What are you doing here anyway? You’re a civilian now. I thought you’d be hard-pressed to ever set foot on the military base again.”
Micah adjusted the mirrored aviator sunglasses on his face. “I’m meeting Dad here. We’re going to go grab a bite to eat at the Officers’ Club.”
“Really?” Lawson was surprised. Micah and his father had never gotten along. And after his father had ordered him to one last deployment upon learning he was getting out of the Corps last year, Lawson would’ve bet money that Micah never spoke to the commanding officer of Camp Leon again. But Micah was one noble, forgiving guy. More forgiving than Lawson would’ve been. Nope, Lawson would never forgive his old man for walking out on his mother the way he had.
“Life is too short for grudges.” Micah was still watching him. “You haven’t come to dinner lately. Just because I’m married doesn’t mean you have to keep your distance.”
“Just giving you and Kat some honeymoon time. Maybe I’ll stop by next week.”
“Monday night?” Micah asked.
Lawson shook his head. “Can’t do Monday. Or Wednesday.”
“Hot date?” Micah lifted his voice hopefully.
“Afraid not. I have, uh, yoga class.” Just saying the words made Lawson’s skin crawl.
“Yoga class? Since when do you do yoga?”
Since he was a coward dressed in a brave man’s clothing. Lawson ran a hand across the back of his neck. “Apparently I need to go to this class to help with my…stress.”
“I see.” Micah had been deployed at the same time, but he hadn’t been on the same mission—the one that had cost their squadron one good man. The accident could’ve been far worse. Lawson knew that. None of them could’ve come home. In that respect, they were lucky. “You could always talk to me about it,” he continued.
Talk. Everyone wanted him to talk. He’d rather put on skintight leotards and twist himself into a pretzel. “Thanks,” he said. “Maybe later next week I’ll come by for dinner.”
“Ben would love that. He’s been asking about you.”
Lawson had missed Micah’s son, Ben, lately, too. Ben was a fourth grader this year, but had the intelligence of a high school freshman. “I’ll try. But listen, I have to go. Got a class to teach this afternoon.”
Micah laughed. “Have fun with that.”
Lawson pressed his lips together and gave his head a hard shake. “You remember how much we loved sitting through that BS?”
“It was necessary, though.” Micah patted Lawson’s back. “Someone’s got to do the boring work.”
But that someone had never been Lawson.
“Hope we see you next week,” Micah called, veering off in another direction. “Have fun in yoga,” he said, with a teasing tone.
Lawson waved an affectionate middle finger in the air at his friend. His heart had slowed since seeing the helicopter in the air. That was good. But if he could barely handle watching one from the ground, how the hell was he ever going to get back in the pilot’s seat? All he knew was he had to. His niece had already had her father walk out on her. Having her uncle stripped away, too, would be devastating.
—
Julie unrolled her purple yoga mat and sat in a basic Baddha Konasana position, resting the bottoms of her feet together in front of her and interlacing her fingers to wrap around her toes. She took a deep breath, filling her lungs with air and telling herself that this second yoga class was going to go better than the first.
On an exhale, she released her worry that it wouldn’t. Lawson had already told her he was coming back tonight. And even though he’d apologized for his behavior last time, he’d only apologized for hurting her feelings. Not for putting down the exercise she loved. He still thought it was a waste of time and energy, and if that was true, tonight might very well go the same way.
She inhaled again.
And then there was the attraction she felt toward him. Undeniable. Intense. She didn’t want to be attracted to him. Yeah, it’d been a while since she’d been with her ex, but she was undoing three years of being chipped away at.
Heavy footsteps entered the room. Julie turned to look at her first student of the night. None other than Lawson Phillips. Her eyes traveled down his long, lean body. He was wearing a cowboy hat, of course. He also had on a loose-fitted T-shirt and athletic shorts. The only thing about his yoga attire that he had right was that he was barefoot, holding his sneakers and balled-up socks in his hands.
“Hey.” His gaze landed on her and stayed, unwavering, which unnerved her.
“Hi.” She swallowed thickly. “Thanks for returning my car to me. And for fixing it.”
He shrugged. “It was the least I could do.”
He was talking about when he’d ruined her class on Monday night. She was about to say something about that when two other students entered the room. In comparison to him, they were dressed in fitted clothing that wouldn’t drape into their faces when they inverted their bodies. They were taking what she was trying to do seriously. They’d also brought their own mats.
“Hi,” Julie said, focusing on them and doing her best to ignore Lawson as he headed to the back corner of the room. As the minute hand ticked toward the hour more people filed in. Julie smiled and welcomed each one. “Okay.” She stood. “Are we ready to begin?” she asked.
She led the class through the basic Sun Salutations that she’d done last time, adding on a few new moves that she’d worked on yesterday at home. Her gaze flicked to the back of the room as she pulled her hands back to her chest.
Surprisingly, Lawson’s hands were also in front of his deeply defined chest. She could see the definition even in his loosely fitted T-shirt. His eyes were locked on her. She bent her front knee. He did the same. His arms went out to his sides in Warrior Two Pose just like her. He wasn’t laughing or rolling his eyes this time.
“Good,” she said to the class, looking around at the others and doing her best not to watch the cowboy in the back. His hat was gone, resting on the floor beside him. His teasing grin was replaced by a serious demeanor. Was he actually giving her his undivided attention? Doing his best?
After several sequences she led the class to the floor and got in a Bridge pose, resting her back on the floor, and pressing her shoulders into her mat. She lifted her pelvis up and toward the ceiling and held the movement. The class followed along.
Getting up, she began to walk around and inspect everyone’s position. “This is a gentle stretch for the back and the legs,” she said as she walked, her legs carrying her toward the back of the room where Lawson was lying. He had his pelvis lifted and his loosel
y fitted shorts were hanging down under his muscled thighs, giving her a view that led all the way up to the curve of his very fine ass. She couldn’t tear her eyes away. He had blond hair running over his legs, and perfect definition of every beautiful muscle.
“Am I doing this right?” he asked.
Caught. “Um. Well, actually you need to open your palms and press them into the floor.” She squatted near him and uncurled one of his fists, very aware that he still had the lower half of his body up and lifted toward her. “There.” She stayed for a second longer. What was wrong with her?
“Am I good now?” he asked. His gaze was teasing when she met his eyes.
“Yep. All good.” She stood and started walking quickly, sizzling with electricity from just being near him. This was going to be a tough month with him in her class.
Forty minutes later, she concluded her last sequence. “Namaste.” And thank the good Lord.
People collected their mats under their arms and headed to the door, thanking her on the way out.
“Great job,” someone said from the doorway.
Julie turned to the voice. Not one of her students. Nope. Mr. Banks stepped inside the room. “You were watching?” she asked. She hadn’t even noticed, too distracted by another.
“Just a little,” he said.
Julie stood and brushed her hair out of her face. It was better that she hadn’t known he’d been watching. That way she wasn’t nervous. Mr. Banks had gotten a true look at her class in action. “What’d you think?” she asked, fidgeting with her hands in front of her. There were still a few students lingering in the room, chatting with one another. And then there was Lawson.
Mr. Banks lifted a shoulder. “I think you did a good job,” he said.
“Thank you, Mr—”
He held up a hand. “It’s still going to be a tough sale to me, though, sweetheart. No offense, but I don’t see how what you just did can help anyone.”
Julie’s mouth fell open. “Yoga has been proven to—”
“I read your proposal. But this is a warm-up to real exercise. Marines can do this stuff in their sleep,” he continued.
Julie did her best not to let her feelings show. What an ignorant, egotistical jerk. This was only the second class. She’d been promised a month before he would make his decision. But it sounded to her like Mr. Banks had already decided.
“That was great exercise,” Lawson said, interrupting as Julie stared, speechless. “I feel so much better after that, Ms. Chandler. Thank you.” He turned to Mr. Banks. “Hello, sir. I’m Captain Phillips. I don’t believe we’ve met.”
Mr. Banks puffed his chest. “Commander Banks. I own the center here.”
“Well, good job hiring Ms. Chandler. She’s going to do a lot of good things here.” Lawson turned back to Julie. “See you next Monday.”
“See you Monday,” she said, holding herself together.
“We’ll see.” Mr. Banks nodded at her. “Maybe I’ll take your class one day, too. See what it really does for me.”
She nodded, unable to produce words. Words might mean saying something she’d regret. Her self-composure was already frayed. First, she’d gone to a job from hell with dirty old Mr. Adams this morning, and now the man who determined whether her yoga program thrived or got laid to rest was stressing her out. She watched Mr. Banks walk out of the room. Then she collected her own mat, grabbed her car keys, and headed to the parking lot, wanting to go home and replenish the calories she’d just burned with a massive bowl of fudge ripple ice cream. Chocolate and ice cream made everything better.
She hesitated as she approached her car, where Lawson was leaning against her driver’s-side door, blocking her entry.
“I guess I should thank you again,” she said. It seemed like she was always swinging from apologizing to thanking him, hating him, and being attracted to him.
“Want me to beat his ass?” he asked.
“No.” This made her laugh.
“Someone should for breaking your heart like that.”
She shook her head. “My heart isn’t broken. I’ll just have to prove him wrong. That’s all.”
“Atta girl. You proved me wrong, so…” He trailed off.
“Did I? You weren’t as hard as I thought then.”
He cocked a brow and her body burned.
“I mean, you weren’t as hard a sale as I thought.” She sucked in a breath. “I need to sell Mr. Banks on this program. Otherwise, it ends and he won’t even let me do it for free. I can’t get a full-time paying job in Seaside, and I’m having trouble keeping a job where I work for nothing. Talk about hard, um…times.”
“You’re doing this for free?” he asked. “Why?”
“Because I believe in it.” She lifted her chin, waiting for him to laugh at her. He didn’t. “Yoga is worthwhile. It changed my life. You wouldn’t understand.”
He stared at her for a long moment. “My sister is looking for someone to babysit my four-year-old niece part-time while she trains her show horse. It doesn’t pay much, but…”
Julie blinked. Was Lawson helping her find a job? “Really?”
“She’s interviewing someone else tomorrow morning. The last three interviewees have been duds. Can you meet her around ten?”
“Yes. Yes, I’d love that. And my car is working now, thanks to you, so there should be no problem getting there.”
“Okay. Well, then I’ll tell her you’re coming.” He pulled a pen from his pocket and wrote down an address and phone number. He handed it to her and then removed himself from her car door.
“Thank you, Lawson.”
“Don’t thank me yet,” he said. “You haven’t met my niece.” The corner of his mouth kicked up. With a wave, he walked to his truck and got in. He didn’t leave, though. Instead, he waited to see that she got into her own car. Julie suspected that he was making sure her car started and that she got out of the parking lot safely. She didn’t need him to do that. She didn’t need a man to do anything for her anymore. But she appreciated it.
Maybe Lawson Phillips was one of the good guys after all—which made him even more dangerous to her than she’d initially thought.
—
The next day, Julie pulled into the driveway of the address that Lawson had scrawled onto a piece of paper. Cutting the engine, she scanned the large yard with a set of stables neighboring one side. There was one horse grazing in the grass and a small, rustic red barn in the back. The scene was out of place for a tiny coastal town.
A petite woman with short, dark hair stepped onto the porch and waved as Julie walked up. “Right on time,” the woman said. She had her brother’s same blue eyes and a ready smile.
“Hi, I’m Julie Chandler. Lawson’s friend,” Julie started, her nerves already bumping through her with every breath. She reminded herself that this wasn’t the only job in town. Or it was, but she’d be fine no matter the outcome of this interview.
The woman met Julie halfway and offered a hand. “I’m Beth. My daughter, Sabrina, is playing inside. Why don’t you come in?”
Julie nodded, following behind Beth. She dried her palms on her jeans, her gaze catching on a chocolate stain on her shirt. Damn it. How had that gotten there? She wiped futilely at her blouse. Not that she didn’t remember downing the chocolate Hershey’s bar in the car, but getting it on her clothing was sloppy. She blamed that on her pre-interview nerves. The same way she blamed stumbling clumsily on that top step and losing her shoe briefly.
Take a breath. Center yourself, Julie.
She forced herself to fill her lungs to capacity, held her breath for a long second, and exhaled as casually as she could sitting at a stranger’s kitchen counter.
“Would you like a glass of sweet tea?” Beth asked, turning back, seemingly oblivious to Julie’s nerves.
Julie strategically placed her arm in front of the bottom part of her blouse, hiding the chocolate stain. “Water is fine. If you have it.”
Beth’s brows lowered as
she continued to smile easily. “I think we have water.” She laughed lightly.
Julie’s cheeks heated. “Of course you do. Sorry. I’m not the best at interviews,” she said, deciding blatant honesty was her only hope.
“How about taking care of children?” Beth asked, reaching for a glass in her cabinet and carrying it to a water filter near the sink. “That’s my main concern. Because the last four people I met with didn’t seem to have a clue.” She turned back to Julie.
“Well…” She really didn’t know how good she was at caring for children. She’d had so little experience. “I love children,” she said honestly. “And I’d love to have the opportunity to get more experience.”
“Sabrina is a little bit of a handful.” Beth sipped from her own glass of water. “She can be strong-willed.”
“People used to say the same about me,” Julie said. “I can handle it.”
The door behind her opened and shut with a loud bang. Julie froze.
“Sheriff Daniels said there’s nothing he can do. This is a private road with no posted speed limit. And if a crime hasn’t been committed, he said his hands are clean.” Lawson had barged into the house like a bull ready to stampede the first flash of red that someone waved in front of him. “So until Sabrina is plowed down by that idiotic neighbor of ours, there’s nothing that can be done.”
Beth frowned.
Julie turned, meeting Lawson’s wild gaze. Wild, sexy gaze. She hadn’t realized he’d be here this morning. When she’d considered the position, it hadn’t occurred to her that working here would also mean seeing more of Lawson. That might not be the best thing. She was attracted to him, and she really didn’t want to be. What she wanted was to be independent. And single.
“I don’t let Sabrina play in the streets, Lawson. It’s fine,” Beth said.
“It’s dangerous,” he ground out, obviously biting back his temper.
Julie definitely didn’t need another man with a temper in her life, either. Or a man who would tell her what to do. She glanced around, debating whether or not to step outside as Lawson and Beth continued to bicker. Or maybe she should just bow out of the interview altogether, even though she was desperate for a paycheck. If she didn’t secure work in the next couple of weeks, she’d be having all her meals at Kat and Micah’s house.