My head soaks in my own blood. Blood spews from my broken nose. My arms feel weak, and with every passing minute they scream. I ignore the feeling and push off the ground. He gets off me and shouts at the crowd. I only have a second before he returns to finish the job.
Rain continues to beat down on us, and with every drop that smacks against my face, I feel the impact of another fist.
“I thought you were supposed to be strong.” My opponent shouts at me.
You’re not weak.
“Now look at you. Crumbling to pieces at my feet. There’s only one way out of this game.”
Don’t let anyone break your spirit.
Now he’s just rambling. His ego is about to get him killed. “You seriously thought you could beat me. I don’t know how you even managed to last this long.” With every taunt, he circles me with his arms spread wide.
You’re strong, beautiful and intelligent, there is nothing you cannot accomplish.
“It’s game over.”
I never wanted this. I always wanted to help people, not hurt them. But I cannot give up now.
“I will not accept defeat,” I mutter under my breath.
“Any lasts words?”
He rushes at me, and I clear my mind. No Fear. No anger.
Hit me with your best shot.
With eyes closed, I breathe in slowly. I loosen my muscles and await his attack. I feel my body grow light as I transition through the particles. The light intensity of my body dulls. I disperse into an array of gas. I feel him past through me before my body returns back to its original state. My feet slam into the ground like a lorry into a tree. Exhilaration flares through my veins. I’m amazed at what just happened but speechless because I don’t know what caused it. My Eye of Horus isn’t activated so it must be something else.
The legend of Bluka is real Calista.
My mind is in a daze. It’s like it has scattered my thoughts with the cosmos in the universe. Ramiyah speaks to me but it’s like I’m trapped in a glass box. This is not good. Images appear on its surface. I can’t focus. My opponent approaches me like a lion. His face morphs into Ramiyah’s. Her brown hair cornrowed down her back, and her hands rubbing her bare arms. She doesn’t look at me. Her eyes watch the ground as she presses her full lips together. The Blue Flame slithers out of her fingers. Unlike mine, the marks she carries are blue swirls that horizontally cross her knuckles and create the number 9 down her arm.
A pain sears through my hip and my knee.
I go crashing to the ground once more. It is a struggle to scramble back when my mind is elsewhere. I see Ramiyah being locked in a dark room, tears filling her eyes. Her fists balled. She shouts, but her words are forgotten and dismissed. I barely notice my opponent hover over me ready to end my life. He goes for the easy way out. Squeezing my throat. Angrily, the crowd cheers him on. The tighter his grip gets, the more I stop fighting. The more light-headed I get.
This is the end.
Or is it?
Everything changes. Time slows. His grip slackens. I can breathe. Something cuts through the air. Within a matter of seconds, I feel something sticky spew across my face. My opponent looks at me with dead eyes. He slumps on top of me. I quickly push him off and stand. My heart threatens to jump out of my chest. Its frantic beating prevents me from breathing properly. I am scared for my life. The bullet could have easily taken me out as well. My eyes travel to the stands. The Prince lowers his gun and shouts, “That was your only get out of jail free card. Count yourself lucky.”
*
“What the hell happened out there? This was not part of the plan. I was not supposed to intervene.” He curses under his breath. The Prince throws a glass at the wall. I really messed up this time. “He is probably suspicious of me. I may have alerted the Kutawala.”
“Blame your sister and her frequent memory swings.” I yawn as Tamari attends to my wounds.
“Why would they be suspicious of you?”
He looks at me in disbelief, his mouth partially hanging open. I suppose unknowingly I had asked a stupid question. “Because I’m not really here.” He throws his hands in the air and squints at me. I should have seen the signs; how he only appears at specific times. He takes off his Dashiki scarf and sits down.
“Like you, I created a double, the only difference is mine is much more controlled. I bet you didn’t notice I am the double whereas I’m really in a different part of Rimorr. This mirage appears different to them, I allow you to see me for who I am.”
“Wait, backtrack a minute, how do you know about my double?” Another stupid question.
“We’ve been over this, I’m a psychic. I can read your mind and your possible actions just by looking at you.”
“How did you do that? Move through the particles.” Tamari asked. I don’t know.
As usual, the Prince has all the answers. “That was kundalini energy. I’m still trying to figure out what the trigger was.”
“It rings a bell.” Mother always talked about it in her lessons. “Why do you have that stupid grin on your face?” He rubs his hands together and starts to move with excitement, constantly changing direction. All previous anger of possibly being found out is gone.
“This is great news. It’s activated. We’re on the right tracks. Success. It’s working. This is…” He fist pumps the air.
“I’m afraid I’m not following. What’s great news? What’s working?” He stops moving and looks not directly at me, more like through me.
“Kundalini is, in simple terms, energy and consciousness. You should know about chakras from your mother’s vast knowledge about how it works and so forth.” He barely allows me to reply, so I just nod my head and allow him to continue. “Now. It’s coiled at the base of the spine where you find the Root Chakra. When the Kundalini is activated, it performs the merging of male energy Shiva: infinite Supreme Consciousness, the Yin, and the female energy Shakti: Supreme Consciousness, the Yang. Together they allow you to transcend the physical laws that confine the hueman body. You were able to shift through the particles in the air for a split moment because your Kundalini is fluctuating between your lower and higher self, moving through your chakras at a rapid pace but unable to maintain a higher position such as the Fifth Chakra. For whatever reason, this could be…” he shrugs “…because you’re unable to express yourself and communicate the way you wish to.”
“So, you mean to tell me you want me to actively participate in what my father is completely against. Spirituality and seeking other-worldly pleasures and abilities that will make us more superior than we already are.”
He shakes his head and dips them into his hands. “Honestly, is that all you picked up. One thing that you are not is your father. This is what I’m talking about, you have to think for yourself. If he’s against this, he’s against you. Besides I didn’t do anything, how’d you think your flame manifested?” He did have a point. “I’m just trying to help you achieve an enlightened state of mind, along with healing your mind, body and spirit. The ultimate goal is to allow you to un-become everything that isn’t really you so you can become what you always were.” How do I decide between the two?
“Right, and what do you get out of it, other than a Princess who is no longer confined to physical laws and has unlocked the essence of her being?”
“Now that you’ll have to take up with Ramiyah.” The passenger within. With the darkness drawing closer, when I step through where would that leave her?
Tamari’s hands caress my ankles. Warmth is created and quickly creeps up my leg. The heat fills my cheeks. Everywhere that aches, aches no more. His energy is soothing and relaxing. Pure.
“She revealed herself to me a while back.”
“Myah?” Tamari whispers.
“Yes, the child to Ramiyah’s being.” Another piece to her makeup is left to be found. When her body scattered to pieces, she was expelled to nowhere in particular. Possibly confined to her homeland, or not. And now her body and soul are a p
art of me. The mind is left to be discovered. That’s if I don’t already know where it is. My intuition speaks volumes. Her mind is where I least expect it.
Tamari’s hands move to my neck. I feel the wounds close up. My lips part. My eyes close. I whisper his name and cover his hands. I open my eyes and he’s watching me. Somethings not right. I see him, but we’re somewhere else. In a bedroom. Her room. Red walls. A walk-in closet. A desk in front of her floor length windows. They both begin to undress each other against the wall by her King-size bed. Raspy breaths. Fumbling.
“Calista…” The Prince calls my name. He’s suspicious, confused. He doesn’t know what’s going on, but I do. Ramiyah and Tamari. As their lips touch, I feel a shock run through my body. I’m seizing. It lasts for two seconds.
“Calista…”
“Zaire. I’m back.” My body moves of its own accord. Ramiyah takes control and walks towards her brother. He quickly closes his mouth and smiles. Dimples and teeth.
“Ramiyah. Too soon or too late?” They hug each other, and he puts my forehead against his.
“Just right.” She detaches herself and walks back over to Tamari. He stands and steps back. She steps forward. Her hand reaches for his, and he lets her. She goes to kiss him.
“Not like this, Myah.” She understands but feels a pang in her chest.
“So how much longer?” Ramiyah asks flopping down in the chair. Her energy has changed. My energy has changed. There is confidence. Control. Strength.
“Not much.”
“I don’t like this. Myah, she doesn’t deserve this. This is manipulation. This is deceit.”
“She’s the perfect candidate. I just need to borrow her, while I complete my task. I’m doing this for us.” She looks at her two favourite people. She understands what they have lost. She knows her purpose. Now they have to understand her actions. She may feel guilty for taking over someone else’s body, but as far as she is concerned, I would be coming out far stronger on the other end. I would be learning from the master first hand, and I would thank her for her guidance. Her guilt would soon past. She is doing me a favour.
“You think I want to do this. He will get what he deserves and we’ll right all wrongs, even if I have to use his daughter to do it. There is no other way. It’s too late anyways.” She raises her right hand. Blue energy swirls through the darkness. The truth. The essence of power. Melanin. “Soon enough she will be asleep, in the land of truth, prosperity, justice, righteousness, reciprocity. All the principles of Ma’at.” Her hand reaches for Zaire’s face. “And I will be reborn to complete my purpose.”
The air separates them. My body jolts.
“What the hell just happened?” I gasp. My chest feels tight. My mind invaded.
“You don’t want to know,” Tamari whispers combing his hands through his hair. Agitation gnaws at me. I need to know.
“We just spoke to my sister.”
“What now?” I ask in disbelief. Of course, she wasn’t just going to stay there for fun. She had awoken from her slumber. “What am I missing?”
“The darkness is where you’ll reside. She will take over your body.” Tamari said. At last the whole truth. It scares me but banishes my confusion.
“You lied to me.” Anger returns and I rush at Zaire.
“I simply withheld part of the truth.” He backs up.
“Same thing!” My Flame manifests. It looks different. “Why use me? If you wanted to bring her back, why not just ask for my help, my mother could have helped you.” You led me to believe you actually cared about my wellbeing. That you cared if I was enlightened or drowning in ignorance.
“It has to be done this way. You are a part of her plan. Your transition into the darkness will benefit us all and Ramiyah can do what you are yet to discover about yourself. Relinquish your ties to your anger, and you’ll find your fluctuation will seize, as you steadily rise to your higher self.”
The flame encases my hand as I stand with Zaire backed up against the wall. His eyes cautiously flicker from my eyes to my hands. He may be immune to the Blue Flame, but what about the red one when mixed together. Without a second thought, I grab his hands. He locks his mind with mine and fights the pain. Tamari breaks us up. My heart pounds. Tears form in my eyes as I’m hypnotised by my flame. A variation of the original. Is this new flame even mine, or is it hers?
It’s all you.
“This is my body. My vessel. My domain! You can’t just overrun my programme with your own!” I shout, extinguishing the flame. Tears shimmer in my eyes.
“It’s already too late.”
“Body of a woman, soul of a child, mind of the free and heart of the wild.”
- Ashley Lemaine
25
The Glitch
{Calista}
I wake up to a searing headache.
In the bathroom my nose bleeds, and I throw up blood. I start to get images of Ramiyah and her father fighting. A tear streams out of my eye. My vision splits. Through one eye I see the mirror in Dakarai’s bathroom, and in the other I see King Amare shouting in Ramiyah’s face. My face.
“What have I told you about rallying up the villagers, it is not your place to dictate who needs punishing from who does not. Now this is your third strike and no matter what I tell you, you don’t seem to be listening. You’re a Princess so act like one, you’re not a warrior like the boys. Know your role, play your position.” His stern look is enough to frustrate me. Why can’t he understand? Why can’t he see what I see, is our perceptions so different that he solely believes what I am doing is wrong?
“What about your position, you have all this power and you do nothing, you should be thankful that I am doing what I am doing.” He raised his hand and is seconds away from cracking me up the side of my head. Regardless of his halt, I feel the blow that should have reached me. I feel the anger that leaked from his pores; I had overstepped my boundaries. The bad thing about it, I am not even sorry. He steps back and thinks of the best way to punish me, since all the other aren’t working. The scars that were left on my hands from constantly being stricken with a cane, wasn’t enough to deter me from the path I had taken.
At the age of 13 borderline 14 I knew what I wanted to do for my people. I believed all this suffering had to come to an end, one way or another.
When he approaches me once more, I feel this would be my worst punishment yet. With my mother out of the kingdom, seeing her friend Empress Nubia, I know no one can save me from the nightmare I am about to endure.
“Since you like the dark so much, how about you take some time out of the light to self-reflect and see the errors of your ways.”
“What-no.”
“I wasn’t asking you.” He grabs my wrist and twirls us to the underground basement. No matter how hard I try to worm out of his grip, his word is final. The door had already been unbolted, there was no escaping this. When Zaire arrives, I am half in the dark half in the light. Tamari watches from afar his hands clenching and unclenching.
“This isn’t fair!” Ramiyah shouts at her father and I at myself in the mirror. My hands are numb from gripping the sides of the sink.
Dakarai bangs on the door. “Calista what’s happening, why you shouting?”
“Father you cannot do this, she could have serious traumatic issues later on in life,” Zaire said.
“Listen son, there’s nothing…”
“Put me in there with her.” I’m shaking my head at him, he’s not listening. He hasn’t done anything wrong, why should he suffer just because I’ve decided to take on rebel characteristics. Whether I agree with his move or not, we are one, whatever happens to me happens to him. He takes the plunge with me, and we both become blind. Blind to the light, yet we see everything. The dark speaks to us in ways the light could never.
Dakarai bangs on the door again. “Calista open the door.”
My vision blurs and then refocuses. He breaks the latch on the door and immediately looks to my face.
“What the hell happened?” One of my eye is glazed over with darkness swirling within. I don’t reply. “Am I talking to myself?” He grabs my arm and forces me to look at him.
“Give me a minute.” He releases me and walks out the room. I overhear him talking to Khari. When I join them, I slump against the sofa and put a cushion under my head.
“Where should I start?” I state matter-of-factly with my legs resting on the arm of the sofa. “Ramiyah has awoken within. I killed with no mercy. Took a life all in the name of my survival. This was seven months ago. I’ve taken more lives than I can count.” In the bubble on Kimarr, time moves more quickly in comparison to Earth.
Khari bounces his leg. “That’s a problem. This means every fight you’ve taken a life, and you’ve become…” I know what I’ve become. I know what I’ve changed into, but will I use Zaire’s theory of a mercenary to justify and excuse my actions? His theory I believed to be morally incorrect. “A savage.” Khari’s leg bounces quicker. Imagine the heir to the throne is now acting in this way.
“Damn Cali,” Dakarai mutters followed with a curse word.
“All I see is blood, and I lavish in it. Its impurities have stuck to me. Not even death is my salvation.” Death is all but my canvas and the ruination I have created, is my masterpiece. No matter how many times I rip at the sheet it never truly disappears. “My hands are stained for life.” The innocent little flower I was before is no more. Innocence has been replaced with monstrosity. If only you could see the beast that hides within you’d run for your life or execute me on the very battlefield I had once called my home. A home that did nothing but set my course for destruction. “I’ve sacrificed my beauty and femininity all for what? My survival. I’ve become just like them. My perception on life has changed, I’ve witnessed the Kutawala’s indoctrinations and lifestyle. I’m willing to do whatever it means to save my people. First I must accept myself.” My bubble smashes to pieces like the crown that has slipped from my head, in all its attempts to be worthy of my birth-right no longer holds the same weight it used to. Now I’m worthy of something much more.
The Masterpiece (The shadow I cast Book 1) Page 12