by Ben Karwan
‘Fine by me,’ says Elliot.
‘You and me, Jen?’ says Teddy, putting his arm around me.
‘I’m not sure I’d be able to help myself,’ I say. ‘Sleeping in the same bed as you, Theodore? I’d be touching myself the entire time.’
Sophie’s eyes widen, Elliot raises his eyebrows and Teddy looks like he’s going to faint.
‘I … You … What?’
‘You heard me,’ I say deadpan. ‘I wouldn’t be able to stop touching myself. Specifically, rubbing my temples, because you’d give me such a goddamn headache.’
He shoves me in the arm and the other two laugh. ‘You had me there, for a second.’
‘Theodore, I say this with all the respect in the world: there is more chance of me becoming the president of the United States than of me doing anything sexual either with or because of you.’
‘There’s more chance of you becoming the president than you ever coming in contact with male genitalia, the rate you’re going.’
We all groan.
‘Seriously, dude,’ says Elliot. ‘Enough. It’s getting old.’
‘Teddy, you can bunk with me,’ Sophie says. ‘I’ll take one for the team.’
‘Don’t pretend you don’t love it,’ says Teddy, and they head into one of the bedrooms.
‘Guess it’s you and me, then,’ says Elliot.
I’m perfectly okay with this.
We head down to the beach for a few hours. After a while Elliot and Teddy head off to find fish and chips, which we all eat together on the beach. Then we head back to the hotel reasonably early because although the temperature has been in the high thirties for most of the day, it’s dropped extremely quickly now that night’s coming and it’s unpleasantly cold and windy on the beach.
When we get back to the hotel, I take a shower and brush my teeth for at least ten minutes. I haven’t done it for the entire trip and my mouth feels really gross.
After my shower, I slip into the complimentary bathrobe, which is the softest thing I’ve ever felt, and join the others watching re-runs of Friends. Room service brings us two bottles of wine so we’re set for the night.
By one am we’re all tipsy and sleepy enough to climb into bed. I’m not sure if Sophie and Teddy fall asleep almost immediately or if the walls are soundproof, because I can’t hear them talking or anything, despite them being a mere metre away.
Elliot and I both lie on our backs for a while, until Elliot rolls on to his side to face me. I copy him and hold his gaze. ‘I’m really sorry, Jen.’
He seems to mean it but I’m not entirely sure why he’s apologising, so I ask.
‘For the way I spoke to you earlier.’
‘Oh,’ I say. I’d honestly forgotten. ‘It’s fine, don’t even worry about it.’
‘It’s not okay. You were trying to help me and you didn’t deserve that. This trip was a great idea.’
‘Seriously,’ I say, reaching over and placing my palm on his cheek, ‘it’s totally fine. None of us was really expecting it and you needed someone to let your emotions out on. I just happened to be there.’
‘It still wasn’t fair.’
‘Elliot, listen to me. If it helps you get things off your chest, you can yell at me as much as you want. I’m just really sorry things turned out the way they did.’
There’s a pause. ‘I lied before. I kind of did see it coming.’
‘Really?’ I didn’t see that coming. He had seemed so excited to see Nessie and not at all hesitant. I usually think I’m pretty good at reading him.
‘Yeah. I mean, I thought I was just being paranoid and doubting everything, but it makes sense now. She’s a lot more introverted than I am. She really likes her space but I like to, you know, be with somebody when I’m with them. I was worried about being smothering but I came to surprise her anyway. I guess it was just the last straw for her.’
‘You’ll find someone,’ I say. ‘Maybe tomorrow, maybe in six years, maybe in twenty. But you’ll find her.’
He smiles at me and rolls onto his back. I wriggle over and rest my head on his shoulder.
It’s easy to see how somebody could mistake us for a couple but I’ve never understood why people think that body contact should be reserved for romantic relationships. There’s nothing sexual about my head on Elliot’s shoulder. We are emotionally close and I find it natural to mirror that physically.
Sometimes there are people in your life who it’s impossible to imagine living without. Not in the ‘oh I’d be really sad if you weren’t around’ kind of way, but in the way that you don’t know what you’d do with your time or who you would talk to without them. Whether they’re a friend, a lover or something completely different, it is just achingly clear to you that you belong together.
Maybe it just so happens that you meet these people you connect with by chance, or maybe there’s a complex scientific reason for it. Maybe you were two halves of the same soul in a previous life and a subconscious nostalgia drives you together. Or maybe your atoms were close during the Big Bang and are drawing themselves back together. Whatever the reason, Elliot Carter and I have one of those relationships. I can’t imagine how my life would be if I’d never known Elliot, if I’d never become friends with him.
Maybe my religious faith isn’t as strong as my mother would like. Maybe I tend to pass things off as coincidence rather than a sign. I don’t know exactly what I believe in but having people like Elliot in my life makes me believe in something.
Chapter Thirteen
After sleeping in a moving car, a night in an actual bed leaves me infinitely more energised. This will come in handy for the day’s plan: Movie World.
After an extended debate in which Teddy argues in favour of visiting Wet’n’Wild (primarily for the innuendoes), Sophie for Dreamworld and Elliot for Movie World, I have the deciding vote. I really don’t care where we go but I eventually vote for Movie World. I tell the others that Elliot should get to choose since it was his car that got us here, but part of me thinks there should be some perks to being my best friend.
The park opens at nine-thirty and is already busy by the time we arrive, nearly an hour later. I pay the entry fee for all four of us (thanks, Grandma) and pick up a park map.
‘What do we want to do first?’ I ask. A huge fountain is directly in front of us, surrounded by a bunch of people who also seem to be deciding where to start.
Sophie takes the map from my hand and skims it. ‘Should we go by section? Start over here in the Looney Tunes area –’ she points to the bottom right corner of the map ‘– and work our way across?’ Her hand makes a sweeping movement across the page.
‘Um, yeah, I guess,’ says Elliot, his eyes glued to the swooping red coaster track ahead of us.
‘You keen?’ Teddy says to him.
Elliot’s eyes glisten in the sun as he watches the coaster car soar across the track. The sound of screams and whoops fills the air. A faint smile crosses Elliot’s lips.
Sophie and I look at each other.
‘I think we know where Elliot wants to be,’ she says quietly.
‘I … No, it’s fine,’ says Elliot, dragging his eyes away. ‘We should all stay as a group.’ But his eyes are back on the Superman Escape before he can even get the sentence out.
‘Go on,’ I say. ‘We’ll meet you later.’
Elliot holds my eyes for a second before he and Teddy race away like two off-leash Australian Shepherds at a dog park.
I don’t really understand how they can go straight on the intense rides – I’ll definitely need time to psych myself up.
Sophie and I head down Main Street together. Quite a few superheroes walk up and down, waving at kids, giving high fives and getting their photos taken.
‘Some of these buildings are beautiful,’ says Sophie, glancing around. ‘They’re so detailed.’
They look like normal buildings to me but I don’t really know what I’m talking about. Sophie has a much keener eye; she wanted to b
e an architect before she had Luke.
We’re a good ten years older than the target audience for the Looney Tunes section, but that doesn’t stop us. We go on a Sylvester & Tweety Cages ride, where we sit in cages that spin around in the air; a Yosemite Sam’s Railroad ride; and then we queue up for the Road Runner Rollercoaster. It feels a lot like being a kid again. I don’t want to go home to responsibility.
While we wait for the queue to move, Sophie keeps talking about the design of the park and how the scenery is thematically linked to the rides so cleverly, as well as the overall aesthetic of the park.
‘You really love your architecture, don’t you?’ I ask.
Sophie laughs. ‘Am I talking about it too much?’
‘No, talk away,’ I say. I like listening to her describe the things she loves. ‘You still want to study it?’
‘I don’t think so.’ She grabs a clump of her hair and begins plaiting it at her collarbone. ‘I’m not sure it’s realistic anymore.’
‘Why not? You could totally do it.’
Sophie shakes her head and leans against the railing. ‘I gave up all thoughts of that when I had Luke.’
‘But you could still do it,’ I say. ‘Plenty of people study and have kids.’
She chews on the inside of her cheek. ‘I don’t know. Maybe when he’s older and been in school for a while or something.’
‘But –’
‘Please, Jen,’ she says. ‘I know you mean well but I’ve thought about this a lot. It was a big factor in deciding whether to …’ Her eyes flicker towards the group of kids queued in front of us. ‘… You know.’
‘Right. Sorry.’ I knew Sophie had considered having an abortion but I guess I let it slip to the back of my mind.
‘It’s okay,’ Sophie says. ‘I’m just saying … It’s something I thought about a lot. And I’m happy with my decision.’
It gives me a fuzzy feeling in my gut to hear her say that.
We reach the front of the queue and climb into the coaster car. Though it’s technically a kids’ ride, the Road Runner Rollercoaster is a good ride by any standards. We ride it four or five times before we head back to meet the boys by the fountain.
‘How was the Superman Escape?’ I ask.
It doesn’t take me long to regret the question because the boys rave about it while we all get photos with the superheroes on Main Street and are still going by the time we reach the front of the queue for the Scooby-Doo Spooky Coaster.
Each car seats four people: two in the front, two in the back. Elliot and Teddy jump into the front and I take a back seat next to Sophie. Teddy surprises me with how loud he squeals when he thinks his head is going to be chopped off by one of the props, a swinging axe. The ride isn’t so bad but I get a little dizzy when we go backwards in the dark. I prefer the Road Runner.
I’m starting to get hungry but Elliot insists we go on the Wild West Falls, which we do before finding some ridiculously overpriced food. (Again, thanks Grandma.)
‘Can we see the stunt show?’ asks Teddy through a mouthful of chips. ‘It starts in fifteen minutes.’
‘I’m down for that,’ says Elliot.
It makes sense to see the stunt show now so we don’t vomit while we’re being thrown around on one of the rides.
The show is crazy impressive; the stunt drivers get their cars up on two wheels, jump off ramps and over obstacles and people, and come within millimetres of crashing into each other. The choreography is ridiculously precise. I don’t want to think about what would happen if one of the drivers needed to sneeze or something.
‘It’s lucky I can’t drive stick, or that’s how we’d be getting home,’ says Teddy.
After the show, Elliot wants to go back on the Superman ride. I’m surprised it took him this long to suggest it.
‘You guys go,’ I say. ‘I’ll watch.’
‘You sure?’ says Sophie.
I nod. It doesn’t go upside down but it goes really high and fast. Even the Scooby Doo ride made me feel gross, so I’m not sure I’d be up to it.
‘Come on,’ says Elliot. ‘It’s not rough, I promise.’
I look up at the arching track and watch the coaster fly across it.
I take a deep breath. ‘Okay.’
We line up for about forty-five minutes. I don’t really pay much attention to what the others are doing around me. Small TVs hang over the crowd with this guy talking about the physics of the ride: four point two positive g-forces and one negative g-force.
‘Is that a lot?’ I ask.
‘Stop stressing,’ says Teddy. ‘You’ll be fine.’
We get to the start of the queue and the coaster pulls up in front of us. I climb into one of the seats and breathe.
Elliot hops in next to me. ‘You okay?’
I smile and nod. The restraint comes down over my head and the attendant checks that we’re all locked in. I have to be okay now. I can do this.
We start moving and I tighten my grip on the restraint. We weave through the subway of Metropolis – the coaster is supposed to be the train – and a voiceover tells us that earthquake tremors are destroying the city above us. The ‘train’ stops and there’s this clinking noise of metal-on-metal, presumably the sound of cogs and gears falling off.
This is it. We’re all going to die. I knew I shouldn’t have come on this stupid ride. Now it’s broken and we have no escape.
But with fifteen seconds until the roof caves in, Superman appears, telling us he’ll get us out of here. Fast.
‘You ready?’ Elliot says from the seat next to me. I nod but I don’t think he can see me. I keep my eyes straight ahead. From still to one hundred kilometres per hour in two seconds flat, Superman launches us skyward, out of the dark building and into the bright Queensland sunshine.
Elliot was right: it’s really smooth. Adrenaline soars through my veins and my hair blows wildly in the wind. I scream but not out of fear. The engineering is perfect and makes sure we get all the thrills and excitement of a rough ride without the throbbing headache and nausea. I’m not sure why I was scared in the first place. And I feel like I should’ve known the breaking cogs were part of the ride.
After the Superman Escape, we head to one of the Batman rides, which is a bit of a let-down as it has been advertised as a new ride but is mechanically identical to this old ride they used to have, the Lethal Weapon. They just painted it and changed the theme. It seems a little like cheating. My head thumps and I feel like passing out after that one, so I watch while the others try the Green Lantern ride (which, according to Teddy, has the steepest inverted drop in the southern hemisphere) and the other Batman-themed ride. Even though my entire body aches, I want to ride the Superman again.
Chapter Fourteen
On Wednesday morning, Elliot goes to Coles and gets stuff to make us all salad sandwiches and then we spend the entire day on the beach.
I lather myself in sunscreen and let the sun soak my skin. I feel lost without my phone: I left it back at the hotel, plugged into Elliot’s charger because I forgot to pack mine.
Midafternoon, Elliot brings up an interesting point. ‘So what are we doing tomorrow?’
Sophie and Teddy look at each other. ‘Um, heading home, aren’t we?’ asks Sophie uncertainly. ‘I thought we were going to drive back over a few days, so we don’t have to drive through the night?’
‘So did I,’ says Teddy.
Honestly, I’d thought the same thing, too. If we stayed at motels and stuff, I figured we’d be back home on Saturday. The only reason we drove through the night on the way up was so that Elliot could spend more time with Nessie but since that didn’t work out …
‘Yeah. Right,’ says Elliot. ‘I just thought … Maybe we could keep road-tripping? Down the coast, stopping a few times … You know …’
‘Oh,’ says Sophie awkwardly, clearly not keen on the idea. ‘I was looking forward to seeing Luke. Not that I don’t love you guys,’ she adds quickly.
‘Yeah, I m
iss The Christina, too,’ says Teddy.
‘Of course,’ says Elliot, almost sheepishly. ‘No, I was being stupid.’
He looks disheartened, though. I guess he doesn’t want to go back home, where he’ll have to accept that he’s single again. Normality only accentuates change.
I can’t ask Sophie and Teddy to abandon their loved ones. Teddy specifically said he wanted to be back by Saturday and Mrs Anderson only agreed to babysit for a week. I don’t know if she’d be okay with the short notice. Even if she was, I’m pretty sure Sophie misses Luke and really does want to get home. Maybe there’s a way for us to stay longer, without Teddy and Sophie?
I’m still trying to find a solution when a guy about our age comes over to us.
‘Hey, we’re going to play beach cricket. You in?’ He gestures over at four other guys, who have been sunbathing near us. Two of them are sticking stumps into the sand while the other two argue over who gets to bat first.
Elliot and Teddy jump at the chance.
‘You coming?’ the guy says to Sophie and me.
Sophie looks at me and shrugs. I don’t really know how to play but we may as well give it a crack.
The sand is smooth and warm between my toes. I stand with the sun on my back, waiting for the ball to come to me. One of the other guys sends it flying out into the water. Teddy races after it, flailing his arms as he tears through the water.
‘That’s six and out,’ says the bowler.
‘As if,’ says the batter. ‘It’s beach cricket – the whole point is to aim for the water.’
After a bit more arguing, the batsman sighs and accepts that he’s out.
Elliot takes the bat from him and sets himself up. He makes a few good hits and then he hits one towards me. It loops high into the air and I run over to get underneath it. I manage to trip over my own feet, yet the ball somehow sticks to my right hand. I have sand all down my bikini. Elliot gives me a little smile as he hands me the bat.