by Head, Gail
“I was addressing Miss Bennet, and would like a reply from her.”
“I am sure you would, but in this case, I think she will agree that I am speaking for her when I say that her time is quite taken with previous commitments. Is that not so, Miss Bennet?”
Elizabeth's failure to answer right away turned Darcy's annoyance into an unsettling disappointment. He could see that she resented Grissholm's condescending manner and was obviously unhappy with his interference, yet she seemed unwilling to contradict him.
This further evidence of a possible understanding between them sent a devastating wave of loss through him. He could not bear to imagine that she was already promised to a man like Grissholm! While there was any hope at all that she was not yet engaged, he stubbornly refused to give way.
“Miss Bennet?”
“I am sorry, but Lord Grissholm is correct. My time is not my own at present. We shall have to postpone our conversation until more favorable circumstances present themselves.”
“May I enquire when I might have that privilege?” Darcy probed cautiously. Her manner was too contrived, too restrained; something was not right.
“As much as I would like, I really cannot say. It is rather complicated.”
Her slightly nervous smile, given under Grissholm's smug, watchful eye only served to deepen Darcy's suspicions.
“Very well, I shall wait for another time then.” Darcy tipped his hat in parting, issuing an unspoken challenge as he met Grissholm's arrogant gaze. “But I should not be surprised, Miss Bennet, if we happen to meet again – very soon.”
Chapter 23
Elizabeth gazed intently across the expanse of Lord Grissholm's desk, looking at him as if he had no sense at all.
“It is the twentieth of September! It is long past the time when I should have received a letter from Mr. Wickham. I do not trust him, and if he is scheming again, I do not think I could bear to have any more delays.”
“Do not make yourself uneasy,” the viscount answered with a placating smile. “It is most likely my negotiations with him have only altered his schedule a bit – and I believe he is wise enough to know it would be a grave mistake to cross me.”
She thought about that for a moment, studying his confident expression.
“You may be right,” she agreed grudgingly, “but if that is the case, he should have informed me of such instead of leaving me to worry like this.”
“In another week or so it will not matter.”
“I suppose not. It is just that with the end to this nightmare so near, it is difficult to have any degree of patience.”
“Nightmare? An interesting choice of words. I was rather hoping you had not found the entire experience unpleasant. That perhaps you have found some things to appreciate?” His brow rose expressively. “I know I have.”
Elizabeth sat unmoving, caught in the intensity of his look, then dropped her eyes to study the intricate weave of the lace on her gown.
“Sir, I very much appreciate all you have done for me. Indeed, it has not been entirely unpleasant, however you must see that the manner in which Mr. Wickham has separated me from my family is a misery of the acutest kind. Except for your kindness and Rebecca's sweet temper, which eases the pain of separation from my own sisters, these past months have been nearly impossible to bear.”
She felt the viscount's powerful gaze linger a few moments more before he rose abruptly from his chair. Without turning to look, she followed the sound of his progress around the room as he straightened an alabaster bust, slowly rotated the enameled globe in its mounting, then picked up a book and leafed through its pages before returning it to the stack. When he moved to the hearth where he paused to straighten a candlestick, she could see him out of the corner of her eye. Nervously, she watched him nod in a manner that seemed to mark the end of a silent deliberation. Then he spoke. Although his voice was low, it was filled with a quiet passion.
“And yet, some say our greatest trials give way to our greatest joys.”
Elizabeth caught his meaning immediately and her heart beat wildly. The calm, steady expression on her face said nothing of the sudden apprehension of what she knew was coming. The moment Rebecca had predicted, the moment she herself had dared to consider, was now upon her.
Unable to respond to his words, Elizabeth continued in the examination of her lace and waited. Her heart accelerated in tandem with his renewed wandering that soon came to a stop at the side of her chair. Only the sound of her one quick breath broke the silence as he reached down and took her hands in his, slowly raising her up to stand before him.
“Do you not think so?”
Elizabeth forced herself to breathe, her senses constricted by his nearness and the feel of his eyes upon her. She knew he waited for a response, but she could not bring herself to comply.
Grissholm touched her face, lightly tracing the line of her cheek down to her chin and gently forced her face up so that she would meet his eyes.
“Miss Bennet – Elizabeth – this business with Wickham will soon be over and you will be at liberty to return to your family, but I hope the separation will not be long. It is my wish that we should part with an understanding between us. Is that possible? Will you promise to return and be my wife?”
“My lord – ” Elizabeth swallowed nervously, vainly trying to relieve the dryness in her mouth, and she turned away from his gaze to better think of the words she wanted to say. “I thank you for the honor of your proposal. Indeed, your declaration does not come as a complete surprise as I have felt your attentions were more than simply that of an employer for some time now.” She allowed him a small, nervous smile. “I am favorably inclined to the proposal; however, I would ask for a little time before I give you my answer. I should very much like to see my father first. I should like to have his consent.”
“There has been no word of any improvement in your father. I doubt he is in any condition that would allow you to converse with him. Perhaps an application to your uncle here in London would suffice?”
“No, that will not do. An engagement is too great a matter to circumvent my father. There has always been a special bond between us and I cannot take so solemn a step without his knowledge. Even if he is not entirely well, I must see him…tell him myself. I am certain if I were at Longbourn he would find a way to give me his blessing.”
“You know that is not possible until your sister's letters have been recovered. We cannot give Wickham that advantage. If your father cares for you as you say, he would understand.”
“It is not a matter of understanding. I will not risk further injury to his fragile state of health by engaging myself without his knowledge or consent. I must see him before anything can be acknowledged.”
“I suppose if that is your wish, I shall have to abide by it for now.” His impatient frown quickly smoothed into a strained smile. “But I shall hope that you will consider the matter more carefully and allow the engagement to be announced. In the meantime, I shall see what I can do to encourage Wickham to a speedy settlement.”
“Thank you, sir,” Elizabeth smiled softly, “I know it is a great deal to ask, but I cannot think you would wish me to begin married life without the assurance of my father's blessing.”
“Well – I shall not detain you any longer. I have business to attend to, not the least of which is a letter to Mr. Wickham, and I am sure you have some suitable endeavor to occupy your time this afternoon.”
Elizabeth smiled again, this time with a sense of gratitude and relief. She had been spared the necessity of having to accept immediately. Blushing as he softly kissed her hand, she left the study more than a little unsettled and made her way to the small garden attached to the rear of the house. The weather was still quite cold, but the icy air felt good against her heated cheeks. It was some time before the cold began to settle in and she was ready to face Rebecca. Entering the house again, she turned her steps toward the south drawing room where she knew she would find the girl.
>
In short order the main points of what had transpired with Lord Grissholm were related.
“Oh, Elizabeth, did I not tell you?! And now it has happened!” Rebecca stared at Elizabeth in sudden awe. “I am so happy for you, but I cannot imagine being married to a man like Lord Grissholm. He frightens me so just to talk to him, and to think of being on equal terms is beyond my comprehension!”
“Equal terms – as you put it – can mean many things, my dear,” Elizabeth replied softly.
“Yes, but what I meant was, well, his lordship is so – exacting in his manner, and you have such a natural liveliness; I know there is much you cannot express in your current position. When you are married, you shall be at liberty to express yourself more freely.”
“In most cases, marriage does not bring as much liberty as you imagine. Lord Grissholm is a man with great responsibilities and is restricted in many ways by the dictates of his position. I suppose it will be much the same for me.”
“Are you apprehensive at becoming Lady Grissholm? It seems like such an overwhelming thing to do.”
“Perhaps is may seem so,” Elizabeth answered with optimism, “but in time I believe we shall be happily settled. As Lady Grissholm, there is much good I can do; and with my father so ill, it is an advantageous match for my family as well.”
“It is just…I thought…Well, from all that you have ever said on the subject I think you would desire a greater understanding with the man you marry.”
“And you do not think I will find this with his lordship?”
“In many respects, yes, but so often there is something in his manner that hints of an implacable pride, especially when you are in disagreement with him.”
“In my experience, it is a common fault among all men.”
“Perhaps it is,” Rebecca grinned at her frankness, “but I should like to find a man less so. The fault is much greater in some than others, is it not?”
“Yes, I daresay it is; but we must own when it comes to an agreeable marriage that there has to be more than one man in the world suited to make us content. It is bewitching to think that there is one alone upon whom our happiness depends. Surely, where there is desire on both sides, any good woman and any good man can enjoy a successful union.”
“And you shall be happy then?” Rebecca asked anxiously.
Elizabeth took Rebecca's hands into her own and smiled warmly. “Yes, I believe so. I suppose we shall be as happy as any married couple. Why should we not?”
She could see from the girl's expression that her answer was not entirely satisfactory.
“Rebecca, your concern is understandable. For many years, you have only seen a harsh, distant demeanor in Lord Grissholm; but have not these past few months shown him capable of a more benevolent temper? It is my belief that with time he will prove to be a much better man than either of us ever thought possible.”
“There has been a difference since you came, Elizabeth. With someone as good as you, it could not be otherwise!”
“On that kind note I think I shall leave you to your book. There is much to be done before any wedding date can be set!”
* * * *
“Thank you for coming, Miss Bennet,” Darcy's greeting carried a hint of relief. “I feared you might not. The manner of my request was somewhat unconventional.”
She smiled at him. “Yes, Mr. Darcy. I was rather surprised when my maid delivered your message; however, it was not unwelcome. Our last conversation has been on my mind a great deal, and as Lord Grissholm's objections were evident, I did not think we would finish it anytime soon. His opinion is quite set against you and my situation in the household makes it difficult to oppose his wishes.”
“Yes, the viscount has made his position very clear. I am not welcomed at Peyton House, so it is fortunate for me that you have a fondness for walking.”
Elizabeth raised her brows knowingly, giving him a wry smile. “His lordship does not think it coincidence that we should meet in Cumberland and again here in London so soon after – nor do I. In any case, he would be immensely displeased if he knew the purpose of my walk today.”
“And yet, you came.”
He paused, and she glimpsed a spark of pleasure in his eyes. The moment was fleeting, but it was enough for her to wonder at the nebulous feeling it had stirred in her. Darcy gestured an invitation to proceed with a sweep of his arm, drawing her attention back to the matter at hand. She fell into step beside him as he turned and began walking deeper into the park.
“Knowing the viscount's resentment toward me, I thought it best to be as discreet as possible. I do not wish to make things difficult for you.”
“You need not worry, Mr. Darcy. His lordship has gone out for the afternoon – this is his day for White's; and Rebecca is keeping to her rooms with a bad cold. I doubt I will even be missed.”
After only a brief pause, Elizabeth turned the conversation to the question that was foremost on her mind.
“I do not pretend to understand the difficulties between Lord Grissholm and yourself, but the dislike is evident, on both sides. I am afraid his lordship's observations after our last meeting were not very flattering.”
“I can imagine they were not. Whatever was said, I beg you do not accept it as a matter of fact.”
“Oh, I do not, I assure you!” she answered quickly, displaying a small rueful smile. “The last time I failed to consider both sides of a disagreement between two gentlemen, I deeply regretted it. I am resolved not to make that mistake again.”
“I am very glad to hear that,” he murmured with a smile of his own.
“Yes, I thought it wise to gather all the facts before forming an opinion. I should like to know your side of this disagreement – if you are willing to tell me.”
Darcy let out a small sigh. It was obviously not something he wished to speak of. For a moment, Elizabeth thought he would refuse, and then he began.
“The animosity between Lord Grissholm and myself began during our years at university. We were never great friends, but society brought us together often enough. In his fourth year, he became involved with a young lady. They were seen frequently in each other's company, and it had even been rumored he would offer for her. Then, one day she disappeared quite suddenly. Publicly, he claimed ignorance of the whole affair, but in private he insisted I had something to do with the lady's disappearance.”
“Oh!” Elizabeth took a moment to digest the troubling revelation. “And was she ever found?”
“No, not a trace.”
The frown resulting from her attempt to reconcile what she thought she knew of both gentlemen only deepened. “Do you have any idea why he would form such an opinion against you?”
“I do not. I assured him I had nothing to do with the lady or her disappearance. Still, these past ten years, he has made it his mission to privately plague me with accusation and innuendo whenever out paths cross He dares not make any formal accusation. He knows there is no basis for his ridiculous assertions.” Mr. Darcy paused suddenly, and when he continued, Elizabeth detected a definite change in his tenor. “Not long after the unfortunate incident, the death of my father recalled me to Pemberley. My days were instantly filled with the care of my sister and the affairs of the estate. I had neither the time nor the inclination to give credence to any capricious gossip that managed to make its way to Pemberley. To this day, Grissholm's resentment continues. My own resentment stems from his attempt to attach my name to the affair and his repeated attempts to defame my reputation and vilify my character. That, Miss Bennet, is the reason for our mutual dislike.”
Elizabeth tried to take in all that she had heard. It was a disturbing tale, indeed. She was pleased, though, that Mr. Darcy had been willing to explain himself so fully. Lord Grissholm, in all their time together, all the hours they had spent in conversation, had never mentioned Catherine Monroe – for Elizabeth was certain that was the young lady who had disappeared – beyond his cursory explanation of the paintings and
Rebecca's presence at Everton. If she were to ask him to explain his prejudice against Mr. Darcy, would he be willing to relate his side of the story? That was something she intended to find out at the earliest possible opportunity.
“Thank you, Mr. Darcy, for telling me. You have given me much to consider.” Having satisfied her curiosity on that count for the time being, she turned her attention to the second question that had been niggling at her since their last meeting. Glancing at Darcy, she was happy to see his demeanor still open and affable. “May I ask you something else?”
“Whatever you wish, Miss Bennet. I shall answer if it is in my power to do so.”
“When our last conversation was cut short, you were saying something about 'my condition'…what exactly did you mean?”
Darcy cleared his throat, and Elizabeth was surprised to find him somewhat embarrassed.
“Actually, the answer to that question is the very reason for my asking you here. Please know this is not something I would speak of under ordinary circumstances; however, time is of the essence.”
“Time is of the essence? I am afraid you are not making any sense at all!”
“I shall explain as best I can,” he replied at her mystified look. “Not long after your departure from Longbourn, a woman visited Meryton. She stayed at the inn only one night, and when she left, there was found in her room a pamphlet from London's Magdalene House.”
Elizabeth had never heard of the place. She wondered at the gravity with which he mentioned it, and her curiosity showed plainly on her face.
“Magdalene House is a charitable institution for the care of young ladies who find themselves shunned by polite society for behavior unbecoming a lady, if you catch my meaning. This unknown woman made several pointed remarks that gave the impression you were a resident of that establishment.”
Elizabeth's puzzled expression instantly melted into one of abject horror. Stunned beyond belief that anyone she knew would even consider her capable of such behavior, she was totally unprepared for his next words.