Hearing his mother’s name reminded David how much he already missed her. He and his biological mom were very close. The fact that she looked young for her age made their time together even more fun. Most people mistook her for David’s older sister. They looked so much alike in many ways, both having deep blue eyes, blond hair, and tall, thin bodies.
“When you finish in here, please join me in the kitchen. I’m making a special dinner for your first night home. Your dad isn’t anchoring tonight, so once his special report is recorded he’ll be home pretty quickly.”
Realizing he hadn’t responded to Steve at all, David stood up to acknowledge he had heard him. “Okay, sounds good.” As Steve reached the doorway, David continued to speak. “We both know I would have liked to have stayed with my friends in New York.”
Steve nodded and remained silent.
“I want you to know I’m going to try. I really am. It’s all so different. I hope I can get used to everything and not feel like I fell down some New England rabbit hole.”
David noticed Steve’s shoulders relaxing. David hadn’t realized until that moment how tough it must have been for Steve to be a one-man welcoming committee when he was not even legitimately related to the kid coming to stay in his home. “No rush. Take the time you need to get used to us and your new home.” David grimaced at the words before he could contain himself. Steve offered a half smile. “Your new temporary home.”
“It’s okay.” David chuckled, hoping to relax them both after his sour expression had put a damper on their first conversation. “You don’t have to say temporary all the time. I get it. You’re trying to be cool with this setup. I know this is my home for the school year. You don’t have to qualify or censor what you say.”
“Good to know.” Steve smiled, and it somehow had a comforting effect on David. “See you in the kitchen.”
“Yep. I’ll be there soon.”
Steve closed the door as he left the room, leaving David alone. In the privacy of his new space, he pulled out his cell phone and looked at the screen. He had set a picture of his moms and himself, on the day his mothers were married, as his wallpaper. Both of them had worn simple, long white dresses, and David had worn a black tuxedo. It had been one of the best days of his life. Even though Rena wasn’t his parent legally, he was as close to her as he was to his biological mom. Sitting in his new room, he missed them more than he ever expected he would.
David had read all sorts of articles about gay boys being too close to their mothers and wondered if that was the reason he suddenly felt so isolated. As cool and supportive as Steve seemed to be, David wondered if he could possibly manage to get close to either his dad or Steve—close enough to fill the emptiness he felt, staring at the picture of his moms and then glancing at his unopened luggage.
Chapter 3
DAVID WASN’T sure he was prepared when he heard the door to the condo open and his dad yell, “Hey, where are my two best guys?”
He and Steve had worked side by side in the kitchen, preparing dinner, filling the time with small talk about the warm weather and how glad they were the apartment had central air-conditioning. David was grateful for Steve’s low-key approach to getting to know him. He wasn’t convinced his father would be quite as willing to give David the time he needed to get comfortable in his new living environment.
Robert Martin walked briskly into the kitchen, tossed his messenger bag on the counter, and grabbed Steve, giving him a whopper of a kiss. It was the kind of kiss David had seen his moms give each other when they had something to celebrate.
Before he had a chance to process the entire situation, David’s dad turned toward him and gave him a bear hug. “Hey, buddy. I couldn’t wait to get home and see you here. You’ve never stayed with us more than a weekend, and never in our new place. I’m just so glad to have you with us!”
While his father’s enthusiasm seemed genuine, David felt more overwhelmed by, rather than happy about, the warm welcome.
As David tried to figure out a way to deal with his father’s greeting overdose, Steve stepped between the two and gave his dad a kiss on the lips. “I missed you today. You had to leave extra early, so we didn’t get a chance to see each other this morning.” David was grateful for Steve’s interference.
Rob turned to at Steve. David noticed his father was only about an inch taller than his partner but had a slimmer appearance. Steve clearly worked out more than his father and had the muscles to show for it. David realized he was now almost as tall as his father, and they looked more alike than he had noticed before. The biggest difference was their hair color: David’s blond reflected his biological mother’s while his father’s hair was light brown. Like David’s mother, Rob had blue eyes, and for the first time David noted his and his father’s were even the same shade of blue—deep like the sapphire in a ring he had seen in Tiffany’s when his moms had shopped for their wedding bands.
Taking a moment to glance over his shoulder at David, Steve turned back toward Rob. “Let me take your sports jacket from you and hang it up. It’s so damn hot out today. I can’t believe you didn’t take it off in the car.”
Allowing Steve to help him out of his jacket, Rob smiled at him. “You always take care of me. Thank you.” After shrugging off the jacket, David’s dad continued, “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
Steve chuckled. “I’m not planning on letting you find out.”
“Good to know.” Tenderly cupping Steve’s cheek, David’s dad drew him in for another, clearly more tender kiss. “I didn’t mean to give you the brush-off. I couldn’t wait to get home and see David.”
David took a deep breath and plastered a smile on his face, trying to prepare himself for his father’s next onslaught. He had no intention of being rude, so he chose to fake some level of pleasure at being with his father rather than completely burst his bubble. “It’s great to see you, Dad. Steve and I had a good afternoon.”
“Steve’s the best. Did he give you the complete lay of the land?”
Nodding, David continued to force his grin to remain in place. “He showed me the entire apartment. It’s pretty impressive. I’ve never lived in a place with such big bedrooms.”
“Living in Manhattan makes it tough on Gail and Rena. Making enough money for the place they have must have meant a lot of long hours at work for both of them.”
“Mom’s a pretty successful lawyer.” David was getting a little annoyed. It seemed like his father was making an unfair comparison. “In fact, she’s been honored several times. I’ve even attended a couple of ceremonies where she was given plaques and trophies from Lambda Legal and other world-renowned organizations.” David could feel an edge building in his voice, despite his resolve to remain calm, but he couldn’t stop himself from continuing to defend his mother. “In fact, the reason I’m even here is because she was given a major responsibility on the world’s stage to help promote LGBT equality. She’s going to make it possible for guys like you to work wherever they want, not just in friendly zones.”
David quickly shut his mouth, suddenly aware he had raised his voice to a level near yelling. He had a temper but didn’t want to ruin the beginning of his yearlong stay with a rant. Shaking his head, David looked off to the side, suddenly feeling embarrassed by his impromptu outburst. “Sorry. I know you didn’t mean to put down my moms. I get a little defensive when I think they’re not given the respect they deserve.”
Once again, standing between David and his dad, Steve squeezed David’s upper arm. “It’s okay. Standing up for your moms is admirable, no matter who you’re addressing.”
Pinching the bridge of his nose, David’s dad looked at Steve and then at David. “My fault. In trying to impress you, I got carried away.” Rob glanced at Steve again, slouching a bit. Steve nodded and held his hand. “I’ve waited all your life to get the chance to spend a good chunk of time with you. I don’t want to blow it. It’s quality time, not bragging time, I’m hoping for. I guess I was m
ore nervous about having you in my own home than I realized. I didn’t mean to come off like some blowhard.”
Steve grinned and David laughed out loud. “Dad, if you’re going to talk to me honestly that’s great, but some double entendres are tough to ignore.”
Opening his eyes wide, Rob blurted out, “Damn!”
Although David was pretty sure this wasn’t the way his father hoped it would happen, for the first time he felt relaxed with his two temporary parents. “Knowing you’re human may just make this doable.”
“David.” Still holding Steve’s hand, Rob took a step closer to David. “I want to be a real father, even if it’s just for a limited time. I hope you’ll let me.” He sighed. “I wouldn’t even mind if you faked liking me, whether you really do or not.”
David rolled his lips inward. For the first time he could see a crack in the armor his father always wore when they were together. “I’d like some quality dad time too. I love my moms, but it would be cool to spend time living in an all-male home.”
Rob leaned against the kitchen counter. “I may not be the exact role model you’d like but I’ll try my damnedest to succeed in the male parenting department.” David noted a couple of beads of sweat forming on his father’s forehead. “I mean, well, I’m not sure what advice Gail and Rena have given you, but I’ve never known much about dating girls. Even when I tried briefly in high school, it was a complete failure. Maybe we can stick to other subjects, and you can make some friends who’ll help you in the advice department if you’re interested in anyone once you start the school year.”
It was as if the opportunity had been handed to him on a silver platter. David assumed his mothers were beginning to guess his sexual orientation, but he’d never actually spoken aloud to either of them about his true feelings. Hesitating, David waited to see if his father would just back away and they’d all sit down for dinner.
“It’s tough having gay parents. I don’t want you to think we expect you to be gay too. We support the person you are and however you’re destined to be.” Rob’s brow furrowed and he gazed in Steve’s direction.
“Don’t look at me. I never dated any girls. All I had were close friends who I went out with until I graduated high school. Once in college I stepped up and found the guts to ask out the people I really wanted to date.” Steve glanced at David. “Besides, straight people raise gay kids all the time. There’s no reason it shouldn’t work in reverse. Let’s face it, it already does; we’ve just never experienced raising anyone before. Give us a chance and we’ll try to do half the job your moms have already done.”
David felt it was time to let the two men standing in front of him off the hook. “It’s okay. You won’t have to worry about me bringing any girls home after a date or asking any details about how to turn them on.”
Rob immediately responded. “But you should feel comfortable in this home. It’s yours as much as it is ours—at least we hope you’ll feel that way sooner rather than later.”
“That’s not it, Dad. Let’s say your advice on dating may be a whole lot more appropriate than you could ever imagine.” Without waiting for a reaction, David reached for the serving plate, turned toward the oven, opened the door, and started plating the roasted vegetables.
David smiled and let out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding. He’d said what he needed to say. While his back was turned, he heard his father whisper to Steve. “Did he just say what I think he said?”
“I think so, but this is one time I wouldn’t mind having the reporter in you follow up to make sure we get the story completely right.”
Chapter 4
“WHY HAVEN’T you spoken to him yet?” David could hear Steve berating his dad in a hushed voice. “It’s been three fucking days and all you’ve done is carry on polite conversation with absolutely no valuable content!”
“How can you say that? I’m trying to ease into this new relationship with David. We’ve never had the chance to be close, and now I have the opportunity of a lifetime. I don’t want to mess it up in less than a week by grilling him about something he may or may not have alluded to.”
“May or may not!” David could hear Steve’s annoyance building. He didn’t have to be in the same room with his father and Steve to understand the emotional distance growing between them and knowing it was his fault. The worst part was David couldn’t be sure whether he instigated the tense situation completely by accident or whether a part of him wanted to get a rise out of these two men who thought they could somehow take the place of his mothers. Before he had a chance to think about his motivation any further, David heard Steve continue. “How could you even say something so ridiculous? You’re a goddamned reporter, and you can’t even see when your son is screaming for attention after revealing to you he’s gay. Are you really so blind to him, or are you just afraid to be a father when it includes the tough stuff, when it counts?”
“And what about you? I don’t see you making any moves to be a supportive parent. If you know so much, why haven’t you spoken to David? You’re the one who coaches teens. How about stepping up when it counts, in our home?” Rob’s voice sounded a bit shaky despite the biting edge of his return attack on Steve.
“Because you made it crystal clear before David arrived that you are his father and I was to only play a supporting role in this year’s adventure. I wanted this to be an equal experience for both of us. You know how much I love kids, but you didn’t want me making any decisions without consulting you. Well, I’m consulting you now, big daddy. How are you going to handle this, or are you planning on avoiding the subject entirely?”
“Why would you think I’d avoid talking about David’s sexual orientation?” Rob sounded offended by the accusation.
“You avoid any discussion involving something life changing. You like to keep the world around us light and pleasant, avoiding anything that could involve conflict or intense emotional investment.”
“I work with the intense and sometimes tragic dramas of the world, both locally and internationally, every day. Is it wrong for me to want to have my home be a safe haven where I can relax?”
“A safe haven is one thing, but you’ve used our home and our lives as a place to bury your head in the sand and avoid all controversial topics.” Steve paused and David wondered if this would be the end of their argument. He chose to stay out of sight until the war of words calmed. “Your son asked why we’ve never gotten married. I didn’t want to tell him it’s because when I proposed, you said you weren’t ready and liked the status quo; you didn’t want to rock the boat with such a drastic change in our peaceful lives.”
“I can’t believe you’re bringing that up again. I wasn’t ready then, and I’m still not ready. I’ll probably be ready someday, just not yet.”
“If you’re not ready to make a permanent commitment to me after seven years, maybe I shouldn’t be here.” David’s eyes widened. He liked Steve a lot and never expected his questions to lead to this. “I love you, Rob, and know I’ll love you for as long as I live, but sometimes you make it seem like my feelings aren’t completely returned.”
“Shhh.”
David wasn’t sure what happened but without warning, the two men quieted down for a bit. He stealthily opened his bedroom door and glanced across the hallway toward his dad and Steve’s room. His father was holding Steve in what seemed to be a tight embrace, stroking his hair. David chose to keep his presence hidden and continued to listen at the master bedroom door. His father continued speaking in a tender, soft voice. “I love you, Steve. I love you so much it scares me because I never thought I could be in long-term relationship. It’s one reason I let Gail raise David and took an extreme backseat in his life. Don’t leave me because I’m not emotionally ready to take the important next step in our lives. Wait for me. I’m trying, and now we’ve added a third person to the mix. I need to focus on David and what’s right for him. Maybe I have waited too long to follow up with him and his surprising revela
tion. I don’t know how to approach him. Can you help me?”
David actually felt remorse. He had put his dad and Steve in this precarious situation by dropping a bomb on them. It was almost as if he’d given them a test to see if they could parent adequately and used himself as the guinea pig. While he didn’t regret coming out to his dad and Steve before his moms, David was beginning to regret how he had done it.
Thinking about the skyping session he had with his moms the previous day, David knew it would disappoint them to find he was toying with his father and not giving the man the chance he deserved. Maybe it was time to let both his dad and Steve off the hook and regenerate the talk about his sexual orientation in a way that might benefit all of them. David smiled. He may actually get some good advice from the two men who, he noticed, were still holding each other.
Returning to his room, David purposely closed the door quietly and then opened it again, letting it swing open with a bang, a bit harder than was necessary, to make sure Steve and Rob would undoubtedly hear. To solidify his determination to make things right, knowing his mothers were counting on him, it was time for David to act his age and cease behaving like a spoiled brat. He called out from the hallway, “Dad, Steve where are you? I’d like to talk with you guys if you have a few minutes.”
Hearing his father’s voice, David stopped outside their door. “We’re in the bedroom. We’ll be out in a minute. Why don’t you have a seat in the living room?”
“Okay. Take your time.” David had no plans. He hadn’t planned anything or asked for anything since he had arrived. Maybe it was time to start acting like he wasn’t just a weekend guest, especially since he had an appointment with the guidance counselor at his new school the following day. Hopefully, he could fix what he’d screwed up on the home front and start to get on the same page as his dad and Steve. They clearly had enough issues of their own to deal with without David throwing a huge wrench in the works.
Run for It All Page 2