by Linda Ford
"It's such fun to surprise you." Beryl's voice provided escape.
Chastity tore herself away from the sparkling fire. "It's so kind of everyone," she murmured.
Emma laughed. "I thought you would come home early and discover us."
Chastity grinned. "And here I was feeling guilty about wasting the afternoon."
Mrs. B turned to Mother. "I thought it was meal time."
Everyone laughed, and Emma sprang to her feet. "I'll serve things."
When Chastity pushed back to help her, Emma frowned. "You sit. Gordon will help me."
The young man jumped to his feet with an eagerness that made everyone laugh.
After they had filled their plates, Mr. Elias asked Adam, "The delegation from the city has come and gone. Was it a successful visit?"
"Very. Besides making several purchases, they've asked me to set up a display in Calgary. They talked about renting a shop and having a more or less permanent place for my work."
Every word he spoke zinged along Chastity's spine. If only she could accept the love he had offered her.
Had offered. Past tense. How perverse her nature was that, since he seemed to view her now as nothing more than an acquaintance, she was almost willing to admit she cared about him as more.
"You might be interested in the man who came to the shop today," Adam said.
Grateful to have something to divert her confusing thoughts, Chastity forced her attention to his news, reminding herself her feelings could not be allowed to rule her heart.
"He put up a poster advertising hot-air balloon rides."
Everyone talked at once. One by one, Adam sorted out their questions, answering as best he could.
"He'll be in town next week. He's arranged for my father to collect the fee and set up a schedule."
"Time for the cake." Emma and Gordon hurried to the kitchen, where muffled giggling could be heard.
Emma came back bearing the cake. Gordon's arms were filled with gifts. Everyone sang "Happy Birthday!"
Chastity groaned. "I'm too old for a birthday party."
Mother patted her hand. "It's not a birthday party—it's a celebration."
Chastity laughed so hard she had to wipe her eyes. "Mother, you are priceless. If this isn't a birthday party, I don't know what is."
Mother had the good grace to look sheepish. "You said no birthday party, so it's not a birthday party."
Everyone laughed. After that it seemed the room rang with laughter.
"Cake or gifts first?" Emma asked.
The guests called out, "Gifts!"
Chastity nodded, allowing Gordon to pile them in front of her.
The first was from Mr. Elias, a monogrammed silk handkerchief. "Thank you. It's lovely."
There was a book of poems from Michael, a blouse from Emma, a crocheted doily from Mrs. B, who beamed when Chastity thanked her. Knowing the pleasure and pain Mrs. B got from her handwork made the item more precious than she could have imagined.
Beryl and Louise had gone together to buy a lovely box of body powder. Pastor Simpson and Miss Martha gave her a tiny black devotional book.
"Sweets for the sweet," Doc said as Chastity unwrapped his gift—a bag of toffees.
Chastity giggled. As far back as she could remember, Doc had come on her birthday with the same gift and the same teasing words.
Two gifts remained. She opened the flat one from Adam first. Inside was a miniature painting of Ellen and her the day they had gone to the falls. Tears blurred her vision.
"Thank you," she said softly. She wished she could bring back the day with all its pleasure. It seemed so long ago.
Quieting the trembling of her fingers, she reached for the last package. It was a black lacquered box from John and Roy and the Knutsen boys. When she flipped it open, she gasped. It was filled with money.
It was all she could do not to cry.
"Now my gift," her mother said.
But before she could stand to her feet, Adam jumped up. "I'll get it."
He disappeared into the hall, returning with a large flat package covered in brown paper.
Chastity looked from Adam to her mother. "What have you two been up to?"
As he pulled out his chair and propped the present on it, Adam grinned.
Mother fairly bounced in her chair. "Open it. I can't wait to see it."
Everyone laughed.
"I guess this explains all the whispering between the two of you." Chastity ripped the protective paper away and gasped.
"It's beautiful!"
An angel, hidden in clouds so that he seemed a part of them, reached down, almost touching a young woman making her way along a winding country road. The young woman was Chastity. A brass plaque at the bottom bore the title "Chastity's Angel."
She bent closer. The angel looked exactly like Colin. She glanced up at Adam.
"But you never saw Colin."
"Your guest, Colin?" At her nod he shook his head. "No, he left before I returned from my trip. Why do you ask?"
"Because this angel has his face."
Everyone leaned close to the painting.
"It is Colin," Emma murmured, her voice filled with awe. "How did you know how he looked?"
Adam seemed confused. "I never saw him."
"Maybe he was truly an angel," Mother said quietly.
Chastity sat back in her chair. Was it possible? Had Colin been an angel? She cherished the thought—her own angel coming with news of a father she had secretly longed for her entire life.
After cake and tea, Michael left. When Chastity rose to help with the dishes, Emma chased her from the room.
"You'll not be doing any work this evening."
Emma grinned at Gordon, who rose to his feet and said sheepishly, "I'll give Emma a hand with the dishes."
Beryl and Louise offered as well, but Emma shooed them away. "You let us do them."
"Would you care to sit out on the veranda with me?"
Adam's voice was so close that she felt his breath. She turned to face him, instantly wishing she hadn't. His eyes, the color of rushing water, blazed through her reason. Swallowing hard, she blinked and forced herself to look across the room. She wouldn't let herself be foolish just because the evening had left her unsettled. But she let him lead the way out the back door to the narrow bench where he sat down beside her. Neither of them spoke. Chastity listened to the evening sounds—a child calling to another, a dog barking, a bird whistling in a nearby tree. Dusk draped them, soft and gentle.
Finally Chastity broke the stillness. "You're sure you've never seen Colin?"
"I suppose I must have seen his face somewhere."
"Do you think it's possible he's an angel?"
Adam shrugged. "Do angels get sick? And why did he come here?"
"I don't know if angels get sick, but can you think of a better way of getting invited into this house?" She rushed on. "He came for a specific reason. You see, he brought Mother and me each a letter from my father."
Adam sat forward, turning to look at her. The light from the window behind them cast golden shadows over his features, drawing them sharply. "Simon LaBlanc? You heard from him after all these years? Where is he?"
She gulped back a sudden rash of tears. "He's dead now," she whispered, pausing. "Colin cared for him at the end. Father wrote the letters before he died."
Adam drew in a sharp breath and sat back.
"Colin says he repented and turned to God before he died." She blinked back tears as she met Adam's eyes. His gaze searched her face and studied her eyes.
"How do you feel about all this?"
She gave a tremulous smile. "Good."
Suddenly she was aware of how good it felt to hear from her father, to know who he was and that he had wished for healing between them. She searched for words to explain it.
"Hearing from him, even though he was already gone, has satisfied something inside me. Like suddenly something that's hurt all my life is healed."
He nodded. "I'm glad."
"Colin told me something else too. He said I should follow my heart."
Adam's look never faltered. "What did he mean?"
She lowered her eyes, needing time to sort out all the things racing through her mind. "I think he saw how I feared so many things. I was afraid I would make a mistake and end up alone. I think not having a father has somehow made me feel I had to build a safe, predictable future for myself."
"And now?" His words were low, insistent.
Chastity laughed, tossing her hands in a helpless gesture. "I don't know if I can put it into words, but I feel as if my heart is growing." She shrugged. "I know it doesn't make sense, but that's how I feel."
Adam continued to study her. "Was Michael part of trying to create a safe future?"
She looked at him and nodded, unable to tear her gaze away from his. "I think he was. Poor Michael."
Adam let out his breath sharply. Then his eyes seemed to darken. Or perhaps, Chastity reasoned, it was only that the last of the light had faded from the sky.
"And now," he asked, "are you ready to step out of your safe place?"
Chastity knew what he meant. His look was intense and probing, his eyes steady and unblinking.
"I'm not sure," she whispered. "Perhaps. I think I'm getting close."
A quick reaction flickered across his face—too fast for Chastity to be able to tell what he thought. He stood to his feet and stretched.
"I should be getting home."
He faced her again, his gaze darting to her lips, then resting on her eyes.
"Great birthday party," he murmured. "Happy birthday."
He stepped off the veranda and then turned back to her. "Chastity, my feelings haven't changed. I still love you. You will be forever in my heart, but only you will know when you're ready to accept my love."
She nodded, her throat too full for her to speak.
He hesitated and then walked down the path and out of sight.
She waited until her pounding heart had calmed before she hurried to her room.
Her birthday painting stood on the chair. She sat on her bed and studied it. Adam was a wonderful artist. This painting was not only beautiful, but it almost breathed peace and safety.
And he said he still loves me.
She hugged herself even as her mind struggled with the implications. Loving Adam carried with it risks. She had to be very sure she was willing to accept those risks before she allowed herself to love him in return.
Colin seemed to speak to her from the picture. "Follow your heart. Love protects, trusts, perseveres, hopes."
Was she capable of that sort of love? Was her heart strong enough to trust Adam's love even when he felt the need to wander? Was it strong enough to persevere when he took to the roads, to remain behind waiting and patient? Or to leave the security of her home and accompany him? These were questions she must answer. And until she could, reason must prevail.
The next night, sitting on her mother's bed, she asked, "How do I know the right thing to do?"
All day she had thought about the choices she faced and was no closer to knowing what she should do than she had been twenty-four hours earlier.
"What do you desire in your heart of hearts, ma cherie?"
Chastity picked at a thread on the bedcover. "I love Adam, but I'm afraid of loving unwisely."
Her mother's hands grew still, and for a moment she didn't speak. Chastity waited, knowing she was praying and thinking.
"Chastity, never fear love. The love of a good man is a precious gift from God."
"But what if—?" She couldn't bring herself to point out how it hadn't been such a good gift for her mother.
Lifting her hand to still Chastity's words, her mother continued slowly. "Adam is a good man. He is nothing like your father was. Nor are you as senseless and headstrong as I was at your age. No, ma cherie, you have shown yourself time and again to be wise, steadfast, and strong."
Chastity lay back and studied the ceiling. Was she wise, steadfast, and strong? Strong enough to face the challenges a life with Adam would bring?
Later, alone in her room, she paged through her Bible, praying for assurance about her future. She sighed. Life was so uncertain. She couldn't begin to guess what lay ahead. Of course, that was true no matter what choices she made. Or even if she let things continue as they were and refused Adam's love.
An ache grew inside her until the tears sprang to her eyes. Life without Adam was a bleak prospect.
But how could she prove to him—and to herself—that she was willing and capable of stepping outside her safe little world?
And prove it she must. For her own satisfaction. She had to know she could deal with the challenges Adam's way of life would surely bring.
* * *
The poster hanging in the window of Silverhorn's Mercantile was large and colorful. Chastity stared at it a long time, studying every detail. And then waited in a mix of fear and exhilaration for the day of the ride.
Then all too soon the day arrived.
The balloon was bigger than she thought it would be—and noiser. She listened hovered over the basket in which two people laughed and waved.
It was so unlike her to want to do such a thing.
Always she had done the sensible thing. Suddenly it wasn't enough. She wanted to fly. Her fingers curled around the wad of money in her pocket. It was extravagant, but she was sure the boys would approve, and not stopping to analyze her motives, she marched to the counter and plunked the money down in front of Mr. Silvertiorn.
The balloon was bigger than she had thought it would be—and noisier. She listened to the instructions closely, excitement and fear combining to make her mouth dry.
She crawled into the basket. The burners hissed. And then they slowly lifted from the ground, rising gracefully. Chastity looked down at the tops of trees and houses and the startled, upturned faces. Not a breath of wind stirred.
The burner puffed out hot air, the sound making her jump. A bubble of joy filled her heart, bursting forth in a shout of laughter. She could never have imagined flying was so freeing. It was like floating in God's hand.
"In God have I put my trust. I will not be afraid what man can do unto me."
The words swelled within her.
I will not be afraid of risk or change. I will not fear Adam's way of life.
Her heart felt ready to explode into a shower of light over the side of the basket.
They drifted across the treetops, leaves flashing like golden coins, over meadows dotted with cows and horses, over gardens with mounds of potatoes and carrots dug up ready to be put in root cellars, over yellowed stubble and pale stacks of straw that seemed as insignificant as a bubble in the surface of the earth.
The hour was up much too soon. The pilot masterfully brought them safely back to the ground.
Laughing, she let the pilot help her step from the basket. Preparing to take pictures of the balloon ride, Adam stood beside his camera, his jaw slack. He hurried toward her.
"You went up in the balloon?"
She laughed at his expression. "You make it sound as if I walked on water. All I did was go on a little balloon ride."
"Did you think about the risks?"
"It seemed perfectly safe to me." Her smile faltered at the stern look on his face.
"Well, it isn't. How could you do such a silly thing?"
She tried to keep back her laughter and failed. It ended up half guffaw, half giggle. "It was wonderful! I wouldn't have missed it for the world."
He glared at her.
"Now I can understand why you need to experience some things for yourself." She grew thoughtful. "No one could have described this for me."
He adjusted a knob on his camera and fiddled with the black cloth. "Sometimes there's no need for firsthand experience." He shuffled his feet. "We need to talk."
"All right."
"Let me finish here, and then we'll go someplace."
"Soun
ds good."
He nodded toward a buggy. "Do you mind waiting?"
"Not at all." Welcoming the chance to watch Adam work, she settled on the ground beside the buggy as a couple prepared to enter the basket.
Adam slid in a plate and ducked under the cloth. He took several photos as the balloon filled and rose gracefully.
While he was working, he glanced toward Chastity several times, his expression puzzled.
She hugged her secret to herself.
Finally he folded the tripod and tucked it under his arm.
She jumped to her feet as he headed toward her, an unsteady pulse throbbing along her veins.
"Are you finished?" she asked, although the answer was self-evident.
He shook his head as if to clear it. "For now."
He packed his equipment in the back and helped her to the seat, the buggy dipping as he climbed up beside her.
Without saying anything more, he flicked the reins and headed down the road. Before they reached town, he turned into a side road.
Chastity's heart began to dance.
He reined in near a thick stand of trees.
"Shall we walk?"
"I'd like that." He reached up for her, his warm hands lighting fires that sped along her spine to her heart, where they crescendoed into a mighty roar. Although grateful for his hands steadying her, she knew she wouldn't be able to stop quivering until his touch ended.
They fell into step. Chastity clenched her hands together. This walk was as daunting as the balloon ride had been, and as full of promise, yet at the same time fraught with a sense of having lost her moorings. She fortified herself with the reminder of how exhilarating the balloon ride had been.
Adam stopped, turning to look at her.
She lifted her face, letting his gaze search hers until he found what he sought. She knew the moment he did, for his blue eyes glittered with triumph. Her heart swelled against her ribs.
"I can't believe you went on that ride," he murmured.
"I saw the poster and thought, 'I have to fly.' It was as simple as that." His look lifted her heart toward the heavens.
He trailed a finger down her cheek. "Are you really ready to fly?"
She knew he wasn't referring to another balloon ride. "I believe I am," she murmured, her thoughts scattering as she took in the rugged line of his jaw and his golden lashes. The musky scent of his nearness filled her senses until she could think of nothing else.