by Ravyn Wilde
“Joey, if you don’t have any idea if it feels good, how can you write about it?”
She looked at him like he’d lost his mind. “Are you kidding? Most of the books I write are fantasy and science fiction. Aliens. Or they are paranormal books, full of vampires and werewolves, Gray. A human can’t do sex the way an alien does it. If I can get an idea, if I can mentally imagine it…believe me, I can make it feel good on paper.” Feeling somewhat foolish she stomped off again. “Go home, Gray.”
“Joey, stop.” Again he chased after her. First chance he got, he planned to chain this woman to a post somewhere so he could finish a conversation with her in one place. The mental picture created by his thought inflamed his body. Jesus, what this woman could do to him without even being aware of it. Catching hold of her once more, he stood in front of her, putting one hand on either shoulder to keep her still. “Joey, you’re going to look at the pictures in those books, turn them upside down and sideways, wonder if any real person can actually do that, and go on to the next. You won’t know or feel how it works, you won’t think…ah, this is wonderful, or damn, this is killing my back. It won’t work.” God, please let her see it wouldn’t work. His body clenched in panic, afraid he wouldn’t be able to convince her to understand his reasoning.
She glared at him. Damn him. It really irritated her that he was right. She hadn’t just bought those stupid books for the trip to Hawaii. She’d had them for a month. She’d done exactly what he said—turned the book upside down and sideways and wondered how the hell anybody did that. The worst part had been her state of mind… she wondered why anyone would want to do any of it.
“All right, Einstein. What would you suggest? And don’t you dare say ‘have sex with me’,” she injected. Her body waged war with her mind…she thought of him…naked and straining against her. Damn!
He looked at her considering…he had been going to say have sex with him, or at least a version of it. “All right, we can do this without having sex. What if we explore positions, tactile situations and sensations?”
“And how exactly are we supposed to do that without having sex?”
“Bathing suits.”
“What in God’s name are you taking about?” she laughed in disbelief.
Yeah, it sounded stupid even to him. But it was too late to back out now and, besides, he didn’t want to back out. He was desperate to get closer to her. He figured once she gave him a chance…” Well, for one thing, we can wear bathing suits and then put ourselves in the positions in your books and do some of the exercises. Maybe you can at least get some idea if the positions are possible, or remotely sensual. That should work, at least until you succumb to my charms and want to have sex.”
And then he smiled again, his eyes full of laughter and heat and male self-confidence. He was making it clear he wanted to have sex with her. Jeez, the man looked incredible. And he made her feel good.
She studied him silently for a moment, running what he’d said through her brain. It proved impossible; her mind just kept getting stuck on the visual of him in a bathing suit—let alone having his body contorted with hers in different sexual positions. She really didn’t think she could just hop into bed with this man or any man after the head-trip her husband put her through. But to take time to explore the possibilities…
“What do you mean, do some of the exercises?” She needed to make sure she clearly understood his intent. She wanted no misunderstandings.
Struggling to hide his grin, he knew he had her now. “Well, I read through The Joy of Sex once. There were exercises, massage techniques and stuff. And I flipped through one of your other books on the table when you locked me outside. In your female orgasm book, there were some exercises.” He was not about to mention the exercises he’d read about concerned tongue movement. She’d probably slap him.
For another moment she remained silent. Watchful. Contemplating his offer. “Why would you want to do this?”
“Now it’s you who are nuts,” he said. “Why wouldn’t I want to do this with you?”
“Gray,” she said, with her patient teacher-to-recalcitrant-child tone of voice, “You are a very good-looking man. I don’t say this to stroke your ego—I’m sure that’s not necessary. But I am an average-looking woman. There have to be other women with whom you could practice sexual positions and not have to worry about a no sex rule.”
He looked at her intently. “Your ex-husband really did a number on you, didn’t he, Joey? You are anything but average. I am dying to spend time with you, get to know you, touch you…not anyone else.” Sighing, he continued, “If you don’t believe me…believe this.” Moving one hand slowly down her arm, enjoying the soft, silky feel of her skin, he picked up her hand and moved it forward and placed it over the front of his pants—flat against his unchecked erection.
Gasping, she flexed her fingers for one startled moment against the warm, hard ridge—and then drew her hand back in shock and looked up to meet his gaze.
He made sure he let the heat show. “Since the moment I saw you standing by the car outside the coffee shop, this has been a constant condition. And I have to tell you, lady, it’s been a long time since anyone made me this aroused for such an extended period of time,” he practically growled the words. “I would be a fool if I didn’t try to figure out if it’s just my penis talking.”
Joey dropped her head. She couldn’t think. She understood what he said to her. She understood the attraction he felt, because she experienced it as well. Just looking at him made her want to moan with unfulfilled lust and then attack him where he stood. She felt her inner sexual being move from where it lay in the dirt. It stretched, stood up and winked at her. Meeting Grey, experiencing such an immediate and apparently mutual attraction was an incredible gift. The Joey she kept buried jumped up and down, shouting at her to go for it!
But years of caution made her question her options. Was this more than a physical attraction? She sighed. Did it matter what it was or wasn’t? For once in her life, maybe she just needed to go with the moment. “All right. Positions. Exercises. Bathing suits. No sex.”
“Agreed,” he quickly replied. It would be up to him to convince her to change her mind about the no sex rule. “When do we start?”
Chapter Five
Joey could not believe she let him talk her into starting right away. She just knew she needed more time to come to grips with his suggestion. But Gray pointed out the longer she waited, the more difficult it would be for her. And it would be dark soon, he reminded her. She might feel more comfortable with this in the dark. Joey knew herself well. If she waited, she’d talk herself out of the experiment. The fact she might decide not to go through with the experiment had been the most compelling argument. She would back out if she took time to think about this. And she didn’t want to.
Gray went to his house to get his bathing suit and since he’d left, she’d spent several minutes wondering if he wore one of those long, knee-length baggy surfer shorts, or something along the lines of a Brazilian thong. The thought of him in a thong nearly made her pass out.
She’d put on her bikini. It wasn’t a thong, but it also wasn’t much bigger. Then she wrapped her hips in a Hawaiian sarong. He wanted to have dinner first and talk. And read through some of the books to select tonight’s exercise. Oh, lord what had she gotten herself into?
The knock on the door startled her. There was Gray. He wore black surfer shorts with a red Chinese dragon design on the side and a gray muscle shirt. Damn. She realized she actually wanted him to be wearing the thong. He still looked good enough to eat. Or lick. Joey, get your mind out of the gutter, she chastised herself. The devil in her wanted to know why? The gutter sounded pretty good right now. She rolled her eyes. Her thoughts always ran completely opposite of her actions when it came to sex.
Gray watched the varying emotions flick across Joey’s expressive face. Disappointment. What was that about? Lust. Embarrassment. And back to lust. Then irritation. The sight
of her in an apricot bikini top and matching floral sarong teased his body. The color complimented her pale, soft skin, the soft tone highlighting her freckles, the skimpy fabric barely able to contain her rounded curves. This was shaping up to be a great evening. “Where would you like me to put the casserole?” he asked.
Joey stared at him blankly for a moment. She seemed to be getting in the habit of being a mental imbecile when he was around. Nothing existed except his body. “Casserole?”
“This,” he said holding up the glass dish she hadn’t noticed. “We agreed I would bring the casserole my housekeeper made for dinner?”
She knew that. “Just set it on the counter in the kitchen by the plates I laid out. We can serve ourselves and sit out on the lanai to eat.” There. Three sentences, and they all made sense. She could do this.
After getting their food and sitting at the table on the porch, she thought she might be doing well enough to try again. “Why is an American Indian in Hawaii?”
Gray raised his eyebrows. “I’m supposed to be on a reservation somewhere?”
Joey rolled her eyes. “That is not what I meant. It just seems a little…” she dropped off. Thinking about it, she realized he was right. Anyone else she would have asked “How long have you lived here?” or “What made you decide to live in Hanalei?” not “Why is an American Indian…?” Good lord. “I’m sorry I guess I did sound…”
Gray cut her off. “Don’t worry about it, Joey. I just wanted to give you a bad time. My folks lived here when I was in high school. Honolulu, not Hanalei. I went away to college. Made a killing as an architect and on investments and decided to retire here. This area had always been my favorite vacation spot.” He looked at her for a moment and decided he might as well get it all out. “Originally I moved to Hawaii with my wife. As an architect, I traveled a lot and worked long days. When I retired here, I no longer traveled, but worked a little bit from home. You notice a lot more when you’re around all the time. What I noticed was that my wife was unfaithful. Her cheating didn’t start in Hawaii…but I become aware of it here.”
“I’m sorry. I know it’s painful. Worse if you still love them, but still not any fun if you realize you no longer do. So you don’t work? Aren’t you pretty young to already be retired?” She wanted to give Gray an opportunity to change the subject.
He laughed. “I’m thirty-nine so I guess you could call that young for retirement. I am lucky I don’t have to work. Occasionally I’ll take a job that interests me or presents a challenge. And for the record…you’re right. I figured out pretty fast I didn’t love her—when it hurt my heart only a little and my pride a great deal. I assumed we meant our wedding vows. How old are you, Joey?”
“Thirty-four.”
Now it was Gray’s turn to change the subject. “So do you know what book you want to start with? I thought 101 Nights Of Grrreat Sex looked good.”
Joey choked. She worked to clear her throat so she wouldn’t sound strangled. Glaring at him she responded, “I think that book is a little much to start with. How about the Fine Art of Erotic Talk?”
“You can read that book on your own and work out the language. I read some of it and I’ll work at talking dirty to you while we are practicing. But no hot sex scenes are going to come from erotic talk alone.” He grinned at her.
Laughing, she shook her head. “You are a mess. You didn’t read too much of it. There are several exercises I thought looked promising. I like the one in particular where I would watch you pleasure yourself while I described what it did to me.” Joey couldn’t believe she’d managed to say the words with out stammering. Well…she would like to see him masturbating!
Gray closed his eyes. He knew from the start this would be difficult. Images of Joey in the shower last night replayed heatedly through his mind. Already he felt rock-hard and primed to throw Joey across the table with her lush ass in the air, open and taking him deep. She came across as an intriguing blend of shyness and sexuality. And the blend of heat and innocence kept him on edge. He wanted to bring her slumbering need alive. Barely managing to speak between clenched teeth, he asked, “Do you really want to start with me masturbating in front of you?” At the negative shake of her head, he relaxed and suggested, “How about the erotic massage book? It might have the added incentive of letting us get more comfortable with each other’s bodies. Would that be a better place to start?”
Startled, she agreed nervously and went to get the book. She hadn’t actually read any of this one yet. Amazed she’d been teasing him, trying to give him tit for verbal tat, she realized she should have known better. This version of foreplay was way out of her league. She needed to keep reminding herself that she needed to act more like Devine, and less like Joey.
Returning to the lanai, she handed the book to Gray. He’d already cleared their plates from dinner and sat waiting for her. He opened the book to the Table of Contents and intently scanned the pages.
Chapter Six
Joey sat on the edge of her seat watching Gray study the book. She didn’t want to make the decision for him. Her nerves were shot. She’d known this would be difficult, for many reasons. But the reality of sitting across from Gray to decide what erotic experience they would explore—together—had her almost hyperventilating. Yes, she would let him take control and make the decisions, the sight of Gray just sitting there already turned her on. And she didn’t want to embarrass herself with her ineptitude.
Damn, she hated her ex-husband right now. Pushing her irritation away she concentrated on just watching Gray and getting her escalating heartbeat under control. The evening breeze softly played with his dark hair. He’d worn it down and the long mane brushed past his shoulders. Her fingers itched with the need to run her fingers through his hair, to play with her warrior.
Gray scanned a few pages of the book, in a hurry to start. Already he felt his plan to ease Joey into a physical relationship crumble around him. He didn’t think he could control the urge to get his hands on her—to convince her that what they would do together should be more than just research. Looking up he caught her gaze and tried to reign in his lust. He shared with her what he’d read. “Okay. Under the first chapter it says we need oil or lotion, a towel, a padded table or bed, or a large towel on the beach.”
Joey spoke up softly, “I have some oily lotion that should work. Umm, what do you think about doing this on a towel on the beach?”
Gray thought she’d feel safer on the beach than in her bed or on the floor behind private walls. She would think she could be sure there would be no sex if they were on the beach and technically in public view. But there wasn’t anyone around to see them. “Okay, the beach it is. At the edge of the lanai where the sand starts there should be enough light to read by. Do you have a large towel? A really large towel or blanket because sand in the lotion on our skin would not feel good at all, Joey.”
She smiled and replied, “No. I’m sure we wouldn’t enjoy rubbing sand on our skin. I know there is a heavy sheet in the hall closet that should work.”
“Great. The book also suggests feathers, fur mitts or a silk scarf but I think we’ll just go with our hands tonight. We can try variations later if that’s okay with you.” Gray’s eyebrows rose in an implied question.
Joey closed her eyes and tried to swallow. Her ex hadn’t wanted to try anything new. It appeared Gray Hawk didn’t have a problem with experimenting. Well, fur mitts were out of the question anyway…they hadn’t been on her packing list for a vacation in Hawaii. “Yeah, later would be good. I do have a silk scarf and I am sure we could come up with a feather, but getting the basics down first would probably be best.”
It was Gray’s turn to close his eyes. It didn’t take much for him to imagine what he could do with a silk scarf and a feather. Joey’s soft voice brought his imagination back in check.
“Here’s the sheet. I’ll go get the lotion and be right out.” Joey needed to calm down and think. Her mind was running in so many different directi
ons, she’d forgotten the lotion on the first trip into the house. Gray would start to wonder if she was severely challenged in the brain department. She was a grown woman for God’s sake; she’d been married and divorced. She should be able to…what? What exactly was she about to do? Start a vacation love affair?
No longer able to fool herself into believing this experience had anything to do with research for a book, she knew if she followed through with their plans, that she would soon be having sex with Gray, if not right now…then tomorrow night, or soon after.
Is that what she wanted? Surprisingly, the answer was easy. Yes. The powerful attraction between her and Gray excited her and she knew she wanted the chance to finally explore that oh, so neglected side of herself. She wanted to explore him.
When she walked out on the lanai and paused, the sight waiting for her took her breath away. Gray had already spread the sheet out and anchored it in the sand with the anti-bug candles from the porch table. A small patch of light at the top edge of the sheet cast faint illumination, so the candles would come in handy. He also set a bucket filled with ice and water bottles beside the sheet. Thoughtfully he created a sensual oasis in the sand. But the gorgeous man sitting cross-legged in the middle of the sheet was what stopped her breathing. His tan, muscular body appeared ready…and willing…for her attention. Attention she fought unsuccessfully all night not to give. Well it was time to give up. Gray continued to read the massage book. As if he felt her gaze, his dark eyes glanced up and snared her, his smile a wicked invitation to join him.
“Come sit by me, Joey,” he said as he patted the space beside him. What was that story about the spider and the fly?
She went to him, and settled on the sheet as he smiled and took her hand in his. “I’ve just been reading the guidelines. It says there are three basic ones. The first is to be present and let go of the past and future…to be here and live in the now. The second is the need to maintain full-hand contact whenever possible allowing our palms, fingers and thumbs to outline the contours. I guess so we never lose touch with each other and our bodies don’t tense up as we wait to see where the next touch is coming from.”