Love Frustration

by RM Johnson

  “No, we couldn’t have,” Faith said.

  “Why not? It’s because of that man you were fucking, isn’t it?”

  “Jayson, no,” Faith said, trying to sound sincere, but failing poorly.

  “Then what happened to him?” I said, trying to calm down. “Are you still fu—… still seeing him?” I was giving her a chance to tell me the truth, to drop the entire game now that she had no reason to keep playing it.

  “No, I’m not still seeing him. I told you that it was just to get back at you,” she said, sounding so phony, and I thought, couldn’t she hear how unbelievable she sounded. She must’ve thought I was a complete idiot not to hear through that lie. I wanted to tell her that I knew everything, that I’d found out from Karen, but something held me back. Then I thought about how she was about to get played herself, or at least it seemed that way. This guy Gary, whom Faith still expects to get to marry her, was moving away, and it looked as though he had no intention of informing Faith of that fact.

  “So like I said, I was thinking about how everything went down, and I was feeling kinda bad, so I wanted to give you a call and apologize.”

  “Feeling kinda bad, hunh?” I said, mocking the way she said it. “And what, you expect me to accept this bullshit apology so you can feel kinda good again? It ain’t gonna happen.”

  “See, I should’ve expected this shit from you. I’m trying to be nice, calling you up, trying to make peace with your ass, and here you go, making a big deal over it.”

  “Oh, I’m making a big deal over this? What should I do, Faith? Just accept your apology and get over it?”

  “Yeah, that’s exactly what you should do. Get the fuck over it, Jayson. It’s over, it’s done. There’s nothing else that can be done about it. Yeah, you caught me fucking somebody, and it probably stung some, but now it’s time to move on.”

  “Stung some,” I said, chuckling pathetically. “That’s the feeling you thought I experienced when I saw you. A little stinging? And now you’re telling me it was no big deal, get on with my life?”

  “That’s right.”

  “It’s really easy for you to say that, Faith. But what if it were the other way around? What if you had caught me fucking some woman. You could just get over it, and get on with your life, hunh? You could accept my lame-ass apology when I called to offer it to you and act like it was no big deal?”

  “That’s right, Jayson. I could do that, because I would know that if a man did that to me, at that point he had stopped loving me, and I would stop loving him. It would be that simple,” she said, sounding very confident. “Now do you accept my apology or not?”

  “I hope it’s never you in that position, Faith.”

  “Do you accept the apology or not, I said?”

  “Because you’ll see that there’s a little more involved than just a little stinging.”

  “Jayson, I’m offering this apology one last time then I’m hanging up. Do you accept it or not?”

  I paused, thinking for a moment, then said, “If you only knew how I felt for …” but before I could finish, she had hung up. I was listening to the dial tone. I pulled the phone from my ear, gave it a hard look, then placed it back to my ear, not believing that she’d actually hung up on me. I slammed the phone down, understanding that she truly was calling not because she wanted to apologize but because she wanted to get relief from what little guilt she felt about getting caught.

  I picked up the phone and thought about dialing her back, telling her about Gary, that he was out of here soon, that he had no intention of leaving his wife and family, and that she would be left out in the cold just like she had left me. Man, how good that would feel, I thought, as I dialed the first three numbers. But then I stopped. That would be a short-lived victory, and it would help her more than hurt her. It would be giving Faith a heads-up, instead of her looking up one day and finding the man she thought she was going to marry suddenly gone. Now that would sting a little, I smiled to myself, hanging up the phone. But that would mean that Gary would be getting away with using my woman for whatever pleasure he decided to use her for, then packing up and escaping. And there was the issue of his wife, Lottie, who I had to admit felt like a friend now. He would’ve gotten away with cheating on her, and that just wouldn’t be right.

  I considered telling Lottie everything that I knew about her dear husband, Gary, and my exfiancée Faith over coffee tomorrow, but then I stopped myself. I thought about everything Faith had just said to me, that arrogant-ass attitude she had, and then I thought about Gary’s naked ass on that tape, screwing the hell out of her in front of my face, and then, amazingly, it came to me, and I knew exactly what was going to be done to settle everything among everyone. I grabbed my jacket, the keys off the counter, the tape of Faith and Gary, and left again.

  32

  It was ten o’clock, Asha had already seen two of her clients, and still there was no sign of Angie. Asha stood by her closed door, needing to go out into the lobby so she could restock her room, but afraid that she would bump into Big Les, who she knew was out there lurking, waiting.

  Asha went to the phone, dialed Angie’s cell phone number, but she didn’t pick up. Angry, Asha hung up without leaving a message.

  “Damn!” Asha said. She knew that any minute Les would be knocking on her door, and what would Asha do then? And just as she had imagined it, the knock came. It startled Asha, making her glance around the room, at the cabinets, under the table, as if she was searching for a place to hide.

  She felt herself getting nervous. What would she do? What would she say when Les asked her what she was going to do? Would she actually be, as Les put it, “Her bitch for a day?” Hell no! But she didn’t want it to come to her having to say it. She didn’t want to face the repercussions of what she did coming to light in this place. There had to be some third option.

  The knock came again, a little harder this time.

  “All right, all right,” Asha said, reluctantly going to the door. She breathed in, let it out, then pulled the door open.

  “You look like you just seen a ghost, girl,” Rhonda said, standing in front of Asha. “What’s going on in there?”

  “Oh, nothing,” Asha said, relaxing. “What’s up?”

  “We’re ordering from Ranaldi’s for lunch. You want something?” Rhonda said, extending a menu to Asha.

  “Naw, I’m good. I don’t think I’ll be able to eat a thing by lunchtime. But thanks.”

  Asha closed the door and walked back into the room, still thinking about what she was going to do, when the door quickly opened up behind her. Asha spun around to find Big Les there, closing the door gently, a sly smile on her face.

  This was it, Asha thought, quickly trying to weigh all her options, decide which was truly the best route for her to take.

  “I stopped by because I wanted to know what you gonna be wearing tonight. I want a visual, so I can start getting all worked up for you,” Les said, walking up to Asha. Asha was taking steps backward, when she bumped into the massage table.

  “You … you shouldn’t be in here. I have a client changing,” Asha lied.

  “You ain’t got no client changing. I looked at your book. You’re clear until lunch. And guess what?” Les said, leaning in so close to Asha, that she could see the light shadow of a mustache growing above Les’s lip. “So am I. So I was thinking that we could start our little party early.” Les reached around, placed a hand in the small of Asha’s back, and gently started to massage her there.

  Asha didn’t jump away from her, didn’t scream, didn’t spit in Les’s face. She just stood there, trying with everything inside of her not to move, allowing Les’s hand to do what it was going to do, and then after a moment, hoping Les would step away. Les pushed her body close to Asha’s. Asha could feel Les’s huge, heavy breasts push against her own chest, and could smell the big woman’s slightly sour breath. She felt Les’s fingers dip into the waist of her trousers, heading farther down.

&nb
sp; Asha squirmed away from Les, pushed her back, and said, “What’s your goddamn problem!”

  Les looked shocked. “What you talking about? I’m just rolling with our agreement. Know what I’m sayin’?”

  Yeah, Asha knew what Les was saying, but it didn’t matter, because there was no way that she could go through with that. No fucking way. Les would just have to go to the supervisor’s office, say what she had to say, and Asha would have to defend herself as best she could. It would be her word against Les’s.

  “Well, we ain’t got no agreement to roll with no more,” Asha said, pulling up the back of her pants.

  “Really? You sure about this? Because you know, I ain’t joking when I say I’ll go to Margee’s office. I’ll go, and I’ll tell her about the little party I caught you having back here, and your ass will be gone.”

  “At least I won’t have to see your ugly face no more,” Asha said, defiantly.

  Les nodded. “Cool then.” She turned around, opened the door, and walked out.

  “Shit!” Asha said, under her breath. “Where the fuck are you, Angie?” Asha stood there in her room another second, knowing if she let Les go, this could very well be the last time she stood in that room. She loved her job, and she loved working at Phillipe Cozi. There had to be some way to stall Big Les a bit longer. She ran out of the room, down the hall, stopping Les at the front desk.

  “Les, Les, wait.” Les stopped, but didn’t turn around.

  “Our agreement is still good,” Asha said to the back of her head, still trying to give Angie a little more time to fulfill the promise she had made to Asha.

  Les turned around, smiling. “Really?”

  “Yes,” Asha said, her head turned down.

  “We can go back to your room, and you’ll prove that to me?”

  Asha nodded her head without looking up. “Yeah,” she said, unsure what she was going to do in the next second. But then, thank God, the front door of the spa opened, and in walked Angie with three other beautiful women, two of them black, one white.

  They all walked right past Asha and Les without saying a word, not even Angie. They stepped up to the front desk, and Angie said to Sue, “Hi, we have an appointment to see Margee Simmons.”

  Asha looked gratefully at Angie and the other women like they were saviors.

  “What’s your problem? C’mon,” Les said, grabbing Asha by the arm, trying to pull her toward the massage room. Asha yanked away. “Sorry, Les. The agreement’s off again.”

  “It’s off again?” Les said, looking angry. “Oh, okay. Cool. You wanna play like that. Bet!” She turned to walk away from Asha, but then turned back, waving a finger. “And this time, don’t come back talking about it’s on again. This is it, so you might as well start packing your things.” She walked up to Margee, an athletic, but overweight, middle-aged, blond woman who had come from her office to greet Angie and the other women.

  “Margee, can I talk to you? It’s very important,” Les said, jumping in front of Angie.

  “Leslie, it’ll have to wait. Can’t you see I have these ladies to speak to?” Margee said, ushering them toward her office.

  “But, Margee …” Les said, walking up behind her.

  Margee turned to Les. “After this appointment,” she said, sternly, then walked away.

  For the next half an hour, Asha sat in the break room, watching some ridiculous soap opera, unable to change the channel, because it was the only one with decent reception. Les sat across the room from her, sucking on a huge sour pickle, wrapped in a paper towel, taunting her. “As soon as Margee’s finished in there, you’re going to be finished out here. Know what I’m sayin’?”

  “Whatever,” Asha said, paying Les little attention, because she knew whatever Angie had planned, it would take care of this situation once and for all. “Why don’t you just keep sucking on your pickle and shut up.”

  “That’s cool. Act like it don’t matter now. But let me see how cool you are in half an hour.”

  Asha got up and raised the volume on the television, when Sue stuck her head in the door.

  “Leslie, Margee wants to see you.”

  Les looked over at Asha, a confident smile on her face. She wrapped the pickle back up in the paper towel and placed it in the fridge. “Don’t you eat my pickle,” Les warned.

  “I’ll try and fight the urge,” Asha said, smugly.

  When Les entered Margee’s office, she saw Angie, two other younger attractive black women, and the one white woman with dark brown hair and matching eyes. They sat in chairs in front of Margee’s desk, all of them with their legs crossed, looking at Les, as though Les had wronged them all in some way.

  Margee sat behind her desk, her hands crossed on top of it, a solemn look on her face.

  “Close the door, Leslie,” Margee said. “Do you know why I asked you back here?”

  “Yeah,” Les said, standing in front of her desk, the four women sitting behind Les. “Because I said I had to talk to you.”

  “No, Leslie. These women have all accused you of harassing them while here at the spa, and they’re urging me to take action.”

  “What are you talking about?” Les said, spinning around to get a look at the women who were trying to get her fired. “I didn’t do anything to these women. I don’t even know who they are.” Then her eyes rested on Angie. She hadn’t recognized her when she’d walked in because of the wrap she had on her head, and the dark sunglasses, but now she remembered. That was the woman she caught Asha about to go down on, and … hold it. Wait a minute, Les thought. And now she knew what was going on. This was Asha’s defense against having to be her bitch for a day. Her and the woman with the shades were in this together.

  “Hold it, Margee,” Les blurted out, after putting the pieces together. “I’m being set up.”

  Margee looked at Les like the woman was overly paranoid. “By these women? Why would they want to do that?”

  “I’m telling you, Margee. I’m being set up. I can explain,” Les said, desperately.

  “Well, you’re going to have to if you plan on keeping this job.”

  Half an hour later, the soap was ending, and Asha was pissed, because it was actually starting to get good at that moment. She got up to turn the TV off when the door flew open, and Les walked in. She stood just in the doorway, staring menacingly at Asha, then walked right over to her. She stopped in front of her, only inches away, still staring, still not saying a word.

  “So that’s how you play?” Les finally said. “Because you got caught doing something you weren’t supposed to, you took my job.”

  Wow, Asha thought. She knew Angie was going to take care of the situation, but she didn’t think she could permanently take care of it. “You tried to take mine,” Asha said back.

  “I need this job. I have a kid at home.”

  Asha didn’t say anything for a long moment. It had never occurred to her that Les could possibly be a mother. “I’m sure you’ll find another job.”

  Les glared down at Asha like she was working hard to stop herself from grabbing her and twisting her into a pretzel. Les walked away, but before leaving the room, she turned and said, “You watch your back. You hear me, girl? Watch it hard.” Then she left the room, leaving Asha with a huge smile on her face, chanting to herself, “the giant is dead, the giant is dead!”

  The rest of the day had been a great one. Asha was able to walk freely about the spa like she used to, not worrying about Les making advances or undressing her with her eyes.

  After work, when Asha stepped outside, the day was so beautiful and she was in such high spirits, that she decided she was going to walk. She took two steps in that direction, when she heard a car horn. Damn. Gill, she thought, but when she turned around, she saw that it was Angie. Asha quickly hopped into the passenger seat of the Benz, happily gave Angie a kiss, and they drove off.

  “So tell me how it went down?” Asha said, sitting in her seat, excited. “How did you work all of that out?”<
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  “Well,” Angie said, leaning back in her seat, all the windows down, the sunroof of the car open. “A lot of my customers go down the street to Cozi, that’s how I found out about it. I told a few of them, the ones I consider friends, that I needed a favor, that there was a woman who worked there who was harassing another one of my friends, and would they help me out? They agreed to do it, because they’ve all been harassed, be it by men at work, or women on the street, behaving like men. So I called your supervisor, told her me and three other women needed to talk to her about one of her employees who was harassing us sexually.”

  “And she believed you?”

  “Yeah,” Angie said, not seeming very proud of what she had done. “Even though Les fought with everything she had. There were four of us, never seeming to have another connection to each other than the spa. Why would we have brought charges against that woman like that if they weren’t true?”

  “So Margee just fired her?” Asha asked, sitting on the edge of her seat.

  “No. She told her that she could either resign and nothing more would be made of it, leaving her able to find a job somewhere else. Or have those complaints put in her personnel file, and next time she came up for evaluation, probably get let go anyway. If that happened, she’d have to deal with those complaints when she tried to find work anywhere else.”

  Asha threw herself around Angie, giving her a huge hug, and big kiss on the cheek.

  “I’m free! I’m free! I thank you so much for this,” she said, throwing her arms over her head, and stretching out in the passenger seat, a wide smile on her face. A second later, she turned to see a bothered expression on Angie’s face.

  “What’s wrong?” Asha asked.

  “Nothing. Just stuff on my mind.”

  “What stuff. Tell me.”

  Angie exhaled, sinking a bit lower into her seat. “After I get off work, I always pick up my son. I know I never told you I had a son,” Angie said, glancing quickly at Asha, then back out the windshield in front of her. “But I do. Had him six years ago. The father’s not in the picture. Anyway, I pick him up everyday from day care, and just as sure as the sun sets at night, Deric calls to make sure that I picked him up, and that we’re both okay.”