by Jane Feather
But when his lips brushed hers, she jumped, jerked her head away. "Your pardon, sir. I… I… am not accustomed…"
Henry stared at her in frustration. Certainly he was taking the game of flirtation a big step further, but the girl knew what was expected of her. And yet he had the feeling that her panicked response had not been feigned, was not part of a maidenly game of sham decorum.
"Very well," he said, not troubling to disguise his disappointment. "Come, I will return you to your chaperon. We shall have other opportunities in the next few days to get to know each other better." He rose to his feet and offered her his arm.
Gareth had watched their disappearance behind the arras and despite all his efforts to absorb himself in the conversations around him could think only of what was happening between Miranda and Henry.
"By God, Gareth, you're as distracted as a moonstruck calf!" Brian Rossiter boomed in his usual larger-than-life fashion. "Come to the card room."
"Your young cousin seems to please the duke of Roissy," Kip observed." The queen likes the marriage?"
"Very much." Gareth's eyes returned to the arras. Henry had made it clear he had little time to spend on this wooing. He would not linger over the niceties of courtship if he didn't have to.
"Then what's worrying you, dear fellow?" demanded Brian. "The wench is willing and able, Roissy is willing and able. The queen smiles. All's right with the world, seems to me."
"Maude is new to court life," Gareth offered. It sounded inadequate even to his own ears. He excused himself and moved away, aware of Kip's eyes resting on his back.
Miranda moved out from behind the arras as Henry held it aside for her. Gareth felt it like a blow to his chest. What had they been doing behind the arras? Had Henry been touching her, making whispered love to her? Had he kissed her? And why did it matter so much to him?
Miranda stood still, her eyes darting around the room, searching for him. And his own eyes pulled her gaze to him. He could do nothing to prevent it. The connection between them was suddenly as vibrant and palpable as a fine chain of spun gold.
Gareth turned on his heel and stalked away through the crowd.
Chapter Nineteen
Lady Dufort staggered up the stairs to her own bedchamber, almost blinded by her headache, and if she was aware of Miranda's steadying hand on her elbow she gave no sign of it.
Miranda saw her into her bedchamber and into the hands of the rat-faced maid, then made her way to Maude's bedchamber. Chip greeted her with his usual passion, as if welcoming her back from the dead. However many times she left him with Maude and returned, he could not get used to it, and each time his welcome was one of ecstatic relief.
"So, tell me all." Maude put aside her embroidery needle with an air of expectancy. She was in her usual place on the settle, but these days she had largely abandoned the shawls and rugs, and instead of lying back with lavender-soaked handkerchiefs and burned feathers to hand, she tended to sit upright, busy with some employment. Reading, sketching, or as in this case, working on a large tapestry.
"You're really getting on with that," Miranda observed, teasing Maude with the delay. She peered at the canvas on the frame. It was of a pastoral scene, with shepherds and shepherdesses gamboling beside a broad green river among the lambs.
“I’ve been working on it for five years," Maude said with a grimace. "But I do believe I've done more in the last weeks than in the whole previous time."
"It's a very boring scene."
"Yes, it is, isn't it?" Maude's small nose wrinkled. "Perhaps I should start another. A battle or a hunt or something a bit more exciting."
Miranda shook her head. "It's always better to finish what you start, otherwise you get into the habit of leaving things half-done, I find. It's not at all tidy."
Maude shrugged, accepting this piece of wisdom as she did most of Miranda's pronouncements. Anyone who had lived Miranda's life had to know what she was talking about. Which reminded her. She reached to the end of the settle. "See the clothes I have for Robbie. Do you think he'll like them? They'll fit him, I believe." She held up for Miranda's inspection nankeen britches, a linen shirt, holland drawers, and a pair of striped socks. "I didn't know what to do about boots. Because of his poor foot."
"I'm going to have a special pair of boots made for him as soon as milord pays me my fifty rose nobles," Miranda said, examining the garments. "These are wonderful."
"Oh, and best of all, there's a jerkin. It'll keep him warm." Maude proudly displayed the dark woolen jerkin. "It's practically new. They're the cook's nephew's Sunday clothes, but she was very pleased to take five shillings for them."
"I'll pay you back as soon as I have money." Miranda folded the clothes neatly.
"No, they're my gift to Robbie," Maude said. "I only wish I could do more for him." She leaned back against the cushions again with the air of one settling in for a chat. "So, tell me about the duke. Is he personable?"
Miranda hooked a stool over and sat facing Maude at a reasonable distance from the fire's blaze. "Yes, very. I think you would like him very much. He's not elegant, the way milord is. He's rather rough in his ways, I think. He says so himself. It comes from having been a soldier all his life." She paused, frowning, tickling Chip's neck so that he rolled his head in bliss.
"I have the feeling, though, that he's not a man one would want to cross."
"But you liked him?"
"Mmm." Miranda nodded, a slight flush mantling her cheeks. "Most of the time I found him very pleasant."
"Why only most of the time?" Maude's eyes sharpened and she leaned forward.
"He tried to kiss me," Miranda said candidly. "And I didn't care for it. I'll have to find a way to persuade him to keep his distance."
"But I believe kissing and suchlike is part of courtship," Maude said with a little frown. "When you read the lays of the minstrels they're very detailed about the little games of courtship. There's always kissing and sweet words."
"Mmm, maybe so," Miranda agreed vaguely. "But then it's not really me he's courting. Perhaps it would be different for you. You might find it quite pleasant. I'm sure you'll like him-"
"Miranda, I am not going to marry him!" Maude interrupted, leaping up with an agitated shake of her head. "I don't know what Lord Harcourt's intentions are, but I will not marry the duke. I will not marry anyone!" She began to pace the room in increased agitation. "I am going into a convent with Berthe." But even as she made this declaration something felt wrong with the words. She'd spoken them many, many times before, so why didn't they sound right now?
Maude flung herself onto the settee again and stared fiercely into the fire. Everything seemed muddled suddenly. She knew she didn't want to get married. She knew she couldn't marry a Protestant. She knew she wanted to enter a convent, to give her life to Christ. She did know that, didn't she?
"What's bothering you?" Miranda asked.
"I'm not sure," Maude replied. "Everything seems so confused since you arrived."
"Your pardon, madam," Miranda said dryly.
Maude shook her head. "1 didn't mean it as a bad thing necessarily. Maybe I'm too young to have settled my future so completely. What do you think?"
"You mean you don't want to go into a convent?"
"I don't know what I mean," Maude said on a note of despair. "But I do know that I'm not going to marry the duke of Roissy."
"You don't think it would be a good idea just to meet him before you make up your mind?" Miranda suggested.
"What possible good would that do anyone?" Maude reached out to a side table for a chased silver basket of sweetmeats. She settled the basket on her stomach and selected a marzipan comfit, popping it into her mouth.
"I think you're afraid to," Miranda stated. "And your teeth will go black if you eat so many sweets." Nevertheless she reached for the basket herself, her fingertips trawling the contents until she found a honeyed raisin. Chip chattered, extended his palm. Miranda gave him the sweet.
"Why wo
uld I be afraid to meet the duke?" Maude demanded crossly.
"Because you might like him." Miranda jumped up.
"Isn't there anything else to eat? I'm hungry for more than sweetmeats. There's never anything at court." She went to the door. "I'll go to the kitchen and fetch something. What would you like?"
"You can't go to the kitchen. Ring the bell." Maude was scandalized.
Miranda just chuckled and whisked herself out of the room, Chip bounding at her side.
Maude leaned back again, idly popping sugared almonds into her mouth as she stared into the fire. Was Miranda right? Was she afraid to meet the duke? Afraid to put her convictions to the test? What if she did like him? What would it be like to be duchess of Roissy? Her own household; her own place at court; no one to interfere with her or tell her what to do. She'd be subject to her husband's authority, of course, but as long as he wasn't a tyrant, it needn't be too much of an imposition.
"See what I have." Miranda bounced into the room, breaking a train of thought that wasn't going anywhere anyway. Maude glanced idly at the tray Miranda hefted aloft on the palm of her hand.
" There's venison pasty, larks' tongues in aspic, and a mushroom compote. Oh, and I took the liberty of borrowing a bottle of milord's canary wine from the butler's pantry."
Miranda set her booty on the table, expertly drew the cork on the bottle, and filled two pewter cups. "1 couldn't find the Venetian crystal, so I hope you don't mind lowly pewter, madam."
Maude laughed. Miranda's high spirits were so infectious it wasn't possible to brood for long in her company. Indeed, Maude had almost forgotten what it was to be melancholy. In fact, on occasion, she even forgot what it was to be pious. She confessed these lapses to Father Damian, of course, but he didn't seem to regard them as any great matter and handed down paltry penance.
It was the sound of their laughter that, half an hour later, brought Henry of France to a halt in the passage outside. "That sounds like the Lady Maude."
"I daresay it is," Gareth said truthfully. He could distinguish Maude's laughter from Miranda's and she certainly seemed to be as merry as her twin.
"She seems to be amusing herself. I had not thought she would be so late abed. Does she have a female companion?"
"Yes, a distant relative my sister brought into the household to provide companionship for Maude and to share her education," Gareth said carelessly. "Your chamber is this way, sir." He gestured that they should continue down the corridor. Henry, with an accepting shrug, followed his host.
Behind him, the door to Maude's chamber opened a fraction and a pair of bright blue eyes peeped around. Feeling something at his back, Henry turned. The eyes met his and then abruptly were withdrawn and the door closed ratherless quietly than it had opened.
"I believe he saw me." Maude leaned against the closed door, her hand at her throat. "He turned around just as I was looking."
"Well, did you like what you saw?" Miranda mumbled through a mouthful of venison pasty.
"I didn't have long enough to judge," Maude replied. "Anyway, I'm not really interested one way or the other."
"No, of course not," Miranda agreed equably. "I'm sure you had some other perfectly good reason for wanting to spy on him."
Miranda left the house at dawn, to walk into the city, Robbie's new clothes tucked into a bundle beneath her arm. Chip, expressing his approval at being out and about in the wide world on such a fresh, sunny morning, danced ahead of her, tipping his hat to their fellow travelers, maintaining a nonstop cheerful chatter.
Miranda was wearing her old orange dress, a shawl tied over her head, wooden pattens on her feet. She was once more a gypsy vagabond and mingled with the crowd of folk going into London for the day's business without drawing so much as a sidelong glance.
She had slept badly and it hadn't taken much insight to know the reason. For a very long time, she'd lain awake hoping for, expecting, the sound of the door latch lifting. But nothing had disturbed her night. The earl had remained in his own chamber and she had tossed and turned at the mercy of unresolved longings that left her body taut and stretched like a violin string, waiting for someone to wield the bow.
She told herself that with the duke sleeping under the same roof, Gareth would have to be particularly careful. But she also knew that she could have crept undetected into his chamber and out again if she'd had the faintest hint of an invitation. But they'd had no contact since he'd turned and walked away from her so abruptly when she'd emerged from the arras with the duke.
She turned into the street where the troupe had their lodgings. Chip bounced up to the cobbler's shop ahead of her. He hadn't needed to be told where they were going.
"Good morning." Miranda greeted the cobbler, who was unbarring the shutters.
He yawned and looked at her sleepily and with some suspicion, but quite without recognition.
"I have business with your lodgers," Miranda explained, moving past him into the interior of the shop.
"They've up an' left," the man said, following her in. He picked at his teeth with a grimy fingernail, trying to dislodge a stringy strand of bacon from between his front teeth.
"But they can't have." It was so absurd, Miranda laughed. She made for the stairs.
"Eh, I tell yer, they ain't there no more."
And Miranda now knew it. The silence from the chamber at the head of the stairs was deafening. Her heart beating fast, she raced upward, lifted the latch, and flung open the door. The small chamber was deserted, the window still shuttered. Chip leaped in and then jumped into her arms with a distressful cluttering, covering his face with his hands and peering through his fingers at the empty space.
"They can't have gone," Miranda whispered, still unable to believe the evidence of her eyes. She opened the shutters, flooding the room with sunlight. Something caught her eye in the corner and she picked it up. It was a scratched wooden top that Robbie played with. Jebediah had fashioned it for him in an unusually mellow mood.
Tears started in her eyes. Tears of betrayal, of disbelief, of loss. She turned to the cobbler, who had followed her up and was now standing in the door.
"Why did they go?"
" 'Ow should I know?" He shrugged. "Paid up and left yesterday mornin'. "
"But they didn't say anything to me. They couldn't go without saying anything to me." She realized she was almost shouting, as if trying to convince the cobbler of something she knew for a fact but that he persisted stubbornly in denying.
"Don't take on so, lassie," he said, softening at her obvious distress. "Per'aps the gentleman what came to see 'em 'ad summat to do wi' it. Mebbe he drove 'em away in an 'urry."
"Gentleman!" Miranda stepped closer to him. "What gentleman?"
"Dunno 'is name, but a right proper lord, 'e was. Come straight up 'ere as if 'e knew 'em right well. Then 'e went out wi' two of 'em. The big woman and one of the men… That's the last I saw of 'im. T'others come back after a while, an' they pays me an' off they goes. The littl'un was wailin' summat awful."
"Robbie," Miranda whispered. She had a dreadful pain in her chest and she was finding it hard to breathe properly." This gentleman. Did he have black hair? No beard? Brown eyes?" She knew the answer but it was still impossible to believe.
The cobbler frowned and sucked his front teeth. "Can't say as I remember 'im. Tall, 'e was. Aye, black 'air, an' no beard."
Why?
Miranda pushed past the cobbler and stumbled down the stairs, Chip still clutched in the crook of her arm. Why would Gareth send her family away? He knew how important they were to her. He'd heard her telling them she was coming back with clothes for Robbie. Why? And where had they gone?
She ran back through the streets to Ludgate. The pain in her chest was growing fiercer, tighter, as if she'd been stabbed; and it was like a stab wound, this dreadful knowledge of betrayal. So unfair, so unjust, so without reason.
She raced through the gates and down the road to the Strand, heedless of the startled glances s
he drew. She was sobbing for breath, sobbing with anger, sobbing with pain.
The gates of the house stood open to admit a drayman's cart laden with wine barrels for Lord Harcourt's cellars. Miranda darted into the courtyard, heedless of the watchman's shout behind her, up the stairs, and into the house. She ran up the great staircase, along the corridor, and flung open the door to Lord Harcourt's chamber.
Gareth was barefoot, dressed only in his britches. He spun from the washstand, razor in hand, lather smothering his face. "God's blood! What are you doing in here? What are you doing in those clothes?" He grabbed a towel and wiped his face. "Get out of here, Miranda."
"Why?" she demanded. "Why did you send them away? It was you, wasn't it? You sent them away!"
Gareth glanced over her shoulder at the door she'd left open. He strode past her and slammed it. He spoke softly, yet with fierce intensity. "Now, listen, you are about to ruin everything. Go back to your chamber. Get dressed properly. Then we'll talk about this."
Miranda shook her head, her eyes glistening with angry tears. "I don't care what I ruin. I want to know what you said… what you did… why you sent them away. I demand to know."
Her usually melodious voice was harsh with pain and she made no attempt to speak quietly. Gareth, with a sense of desperation, took her by the shoulders and shook her. "Hush. For Christ's sake, be quiet a minute! Hen… the duke is in the next-door chamber. The entire household is up and about and you'll have them around our ears like a swarm of hornets in a minute."
"I don't care," Miranda said, trying to twitch away from his hands. "I don't care, damn you!" A tear finally broke loose and rolled down her cheek. He had betrayed her. She loved him and he had stabbed her in the back and now his only concern was that in her un-happiness she'd ruin his plans.
Angrily, she grabbed the towel from his hand and swiped at the tears that were now falling as if a dam had broken. The towel was damp and fragrant with the soap he'd been using to shave and for some reason this made her cry all the harder.