by A. E. Neal
As soon as my eye caught the short, button-up khaki dress in the display window, I smiled brightly. "I wonder if they have it in my size," I said, gazing into the window.
"You'll only be able to wear if for a few months, but I think it's cute," Ally said and I frowned.
She held the door open for me and we were immediately greeted by a young sales woman who couldn't have been older than nineteen.
"Can I help you ladies find anything today?"
"No, thanks," I said. "We're just browsing."
I'd gone through just about every rack, pulling cute summer dresses from their hangers, trying on capri pants that hugged every curve in my body before deciding it was too depressing, since I wouldn't be able to wear any of them for very long.
I found Ally, who had a long black and grey maxi skirt tucked over her arm.
"I'm ready, whenever you are," I offered.
"You didn't find anything? That's weird, usually you have so much stuff, we have to ask for help."
"Yeah, I guess I'm just not in the mood."
She paid for her skirt and as we went from store to store, the more I wanted to cry.
"This sucks," I said solemnly.
Ally took my hand and pulled me behind her. "I know the perfect place."
I huffed and rolled my eyes, but managed to keep up with her long strides.
The store front told me it was a baby boutique and I planted my feet where I stood, causing Ally to trip.
"Come on, they have the cutest stuff in here. At least just look, and if there isn't anything you like, we can leave."
"Fine," I protested.
Zac
I'd probably gone through ten different boxes in the basement, finding all sorts of cool shit from mine and Ally's childhood. Old medals from baseball, a few pictures of Mom and a couple of my old journals. As I flipped through the pages of scribble, I came across a song I'd written. And from the looks of it, there was a reason it had been tucked away in a box for the last ten years.
I tossed another box to the side and that's when I spotted it. The outside of it read, "Zac's Nintendo 64" in bold, black permanent marker.
"Yes!" I shouted gleefully as I tore the box open.
I ran upstairs, hooked the game console up to the TV in the living room, popped in my favorite game of all time and watched as the screen lit up.
I peeked my head into Ally's room and Brody lifted a hand. "I'm good," he offered.
"Nah, man. I've come to get you outta here."
"Ally will have our necks if I leave, you know?"
"Fuck her. Come on. I'll help you up. It'll totally be worth it, I promise."
No sense in letting the guy rot away in bed. It'd probably been days since he'd been outside or let alone taken a shower. I felt bad for him.
"Alright, fine. But it's your ass, if she gets pissed."
"Deal," I said and helped him out of bed.
With one arm around my neck, I held most of his weight against me as we walked or rather, he hobbled down the hallway into the living room.
"Dude, shut up," he said and I swore his eyes lit up as he saw the screen.
I helped him to the couch and propped his leg on a few pillows.
"You good? Need anything?" I asked.
"Controller," he said, holding his hand out.
Yeah, I knew I liked Brody. I handed him the controller and he smiled.
"I used to love this game. My housekeeper, Es, used to kick my ass."
I laughed. "She must have been good...or you just sucked."
"Probably a little of both."
"You ready for this? Split screen death match, buddy."
"Oh, it's on."
Who didn't like a friendly game of GoldenEye 007? Yeah, I thought so.
Kennedy
We lugged our exorbitant amount of shopping bags to the front door of the townhouse, laughing. I had to admit, shopping for a baby was actually quite fun. Who knew I had it in me?
I'd gotten several gender-friendly onesies, a few stuffed animals and ordered a crib. Ally on the other hand, insisted on buying every book about newborns, raising kids and the entire Dr. Seuss collection, about twenty outfits, a huge, plush, pink pig, which made me laugh after Zac's comment earlier that morning. Like I said, we went a little overboard.
We dropped our bags inside the door and heard the guys cheering and cussing in the living room. I glanced at Ally, who just shrugged. It was obvious, they hadn't heard us come in, so we snuck around the corner and caught the two boys playing GoldenEye 007.
"So this is what happens when we leave you two alone, I see," I said and both of them jumped.
"Shit, busted," Zac said and leaned his head back over the couch.
"I thought you were supposed to stay in bed, Mister McCabe," I teased.
Ally looked furious, but she sauntered over to Brody and gave him a peck on the cheek. "Glad you guys are having fun," she said.
Zac got up and came around the couch, grasping me by the hips and pulled me into him. "I missed you," he said sweetly.
"You know, Ally's gonna have your balls for this?" I whispered.
"I'll take my chances," he said as he looked over his shoulder at Brody who's face was lit up. "Totally worth it."
"True, he does look better."
His eyes widened as he looked down the hallway toward the door. "Jesus, what the hell did you two buy?"
Ally laughed. "Baby stuff."
He glanced back at me and I nodded happily. "Baby stuff," I reiterated.
"Is there gonna be a litter of them?" he joked. "That's a lot of baby shit."
"And," Ally interjected, "there's more on its way."
"How much more?"
"Let's see, a crib, a bassinet, linens, a cute mobile to go over her crib and a few other things...nothing huge. Jeez, calm down," Ally said excitedly as she recited the mental list of everything we'd ordered.
Zac looked like he was going to hyperventilate. "Her crib? I see you've coaxed her over to the dark side, too."
"Yeah, it's a girl," Ally said in a sing-song voice. "But don't worry, brother, we only bought gender-neutral stuff until we know for sure."
"Great," he said and Brody chuckled. "Thanks for the support, man."
"No prob," Brody said and threw a wave over his shoulder.
Chapter 30
Two months later
Kennedy
Since Zac had signed a six month lease, he and I agreed to live apart for a while. It would give us the space we needed, so I wouldn't kill him in his sleep. Although, he did spend almost every night with me, anyway. He said it was because I was still having the same reoccurring nightmare, but luckily I hadn't stopped breathing like I did with the first one.
We finally had a chance to talk about his relationship or lack thereof with Kirsten, who as it turned out, was Zac's crazy stalker. After about the seventieth email featuring her and Zac naked going at it in every position known to man, he finally reported her to the police, which made getting a restraining order much easier to obtain. I hadn't seen her in a few weeks and from what Zac had told me, she was bringing home a new guy almost every night. So much for being in love with him.
Zac picked up extra bartending shifts at Epic, thanks to Brody, which helped cushion our baby's savings account. I asked Gage to keep me on call for any appointments I might have, so I could stay off my feet as much as possible. They were already getting swollen and I spent most of my free time floating in the pool at our complex.
Brody and Ally moved back into his apartment above the bar and I had to admit, I was sad to see them leave. He was healing up really well and the doctors had high hopes that he'd be able to play hockey again, which made him happier than I'd ever seen him. Ally still came by almost everyday to check on me, make sure I was eating right and she'd always leave by giving my tiny pooch of a belly a good luck rub, like you would do to Buddha.
I grabbed my purse, keys and headed out the door, just as my phone chimed.
Zac: 1:30 right?
Me: Yes, please don't be late.
Zac: Wouldn't miss it for the world, babe.
I tucked my phone into my purse and headed to Doctor Keller's office, praying I wouldn't run into Deacon again.
The office was quieter than usual and they had installed a TV in the waiting area, which was currently showing Dora the Explorer on mute.
Twenty minutes after one and no sign of Zac. I checked in with the receptionist and took a seat in the empty waiting room.
So far, my pregnancy hadn't been bad at all. I'd read a few of the books Ally had gotten me, which just terrified me and I ended up hiding them in the basement. You can't un-see pictures of a vaginal birth, it's just not possible. I cringed at the thought and made a mental note to ask my doctor about knocking me out for the entire process, so I wouldn't have to actually live the photographs I'd seen.
One twenty-five, and Zac still hadn't shown up. I was beginning to get worried. This was the single, most important doctor's visit and he promised he wouldn't miss it. I swiped the screen on my phone again and typed him a quick message.
Me: Almost time.
And I waited...and waited. But he didn't respond. I let out a huff, turned my phone off, shoved it back into my purse and gazed out the window. His car wasn't there, and I had a pang of hurt wash over me when I realized he wasn't coming.
"Kennedy Allen," the nurse called. After one last glance out the window, I stood and followed the nurse.
As with my other appointments, I undressed, put on the ugly gown and sat on the paper-lined table, waiting for Doctor Keller to enter. Luckily, Deacon wasn't anywhere to be found and the nurse offered me some orange juice while I waited, which helped calm me down a bit.
The clock hanging on the wall read, one thirty-eight and I'd turned my phone off, so I wasn't sure if Zac had tried to reach me or not. "Come on, Zac," I muttered under my breath.
Doctor Keller entered and completed her exam, before discussing how I was feeling, what I was eating and if any of my dizzy spells had returned.
"No, but I am having nightmares still. Well, the same nightmare over and over again."
"With the change in your hormones, nightmares are completely normal."
Which didn't tell me a damn thing, or how to stop them. She suggested I drink warm milk before bed and the thought of curdled milk came to mind, causing me to gag.
Doctor Keller finished up her notes and let me know that the ultrasound technician would be in to see me soon.
Five minutes after two, and still no Zac. I wanted to scream, cry and punch something, but I sat there and waited calmly for the tech to give me the news I'd been waiting for.
I grabbed a magazine from the table next to me and flipped through it. Pictures of happy families, newborns and their parents all stared back at me as if they were silently saying, "We told you so."
A few minutes later, the tech I'd seen last time, smiled brightly as she wheeled the ultrasound machine in behind her.
"Hopefully, the little one will be more cooperative than last time. How 'bout we take a look?" she asked excitedly, but I'm sure the frown on my face spoke louder than words. She sat at my side and touched my arm lightly.
"Will the father be joining us today?" she asked. And that was all it took. I buried my face in my palms and cried. I hadn't cried in several weeks, so I had enough tears built up to fill Lake Michigan.
She put her hand on my shoulder as I sobbed. "He-he-he said he'd b-b-be here, b-b-but I don't know where he is."
"It's okay, Kennedy," she said in a soft tone that under any other circumstance would have calmed a hungry tiger, but not today.
I sucked in a breath. "I'm gonna rip his balls off when I see him," I said angrily, but the tears kept coming and she laughed a little. Glad I was amusing someone.
"We can wait and schedule it for another day. Would you like me to see when the next open appointment is?" she asked, but was abruptly cut off by the door swinging open.
I glanced up at him and he was filthy and covered in grease. "Where the fuck have you been?" I snapped. "Sorry," I said to the technician.
"Do you two need a minute?" she asked.
"No," I growled. "We're doing this, now."
"Ken, I'm s—" But before he could finish his sentence I put my hand up to quiet him. He'd already ruined what was supposed to be one of the happiest moments of our lives. I wasn't going to let him make it worse by saying something stupid.
He took a seat on the opposite side of me, but he didn't dare reach for my hand. He was smarter than I thought.
The tech, who's name I still hadn't been able to remember, handed me a tissue and I blotted my mascara-stained cheeks and sniffled.
She squeezed the goo onto my belly and worked the little probe in circles until she found the baby.
Zac
Her eyes were rimmed in crimson and I knew I fucked up. The one time I actually needed to be there for her and I screwed up. She'd never forgive me and now, she wouldn't even let me explain. The technician shot me a wary glance as she moved the little probe over Kennedy's belly.
Of course, women stuck together and right now, I was afraid for my life. I sat back, looked down at my hands, which were covered in grease and realized I must have looked like I'd just dug someone's grave. Hey, I never said I was a mechanic. It wasn't my fault my car decided to break down in the middle of the city.
I watched as the tech's hand stopped and she concentrated on the screen in front of her.
"Are you ready?" she asked.
We nodded at the same time.
"Well, it looks like you two are going to be the proud parents of a baby boy."
"A boy?" she asked as she wept. "No, no, no, check again. That's not right. I'm sure there's been a mistake. I'm having a girl. I felt it, she's a girl, not a boy."
I didn't dare open my mouth, but silently, I was throwing a backyard kegger, handing out cigars and cheering at the top of my lungs, "It's a BOY!"
Chapter 31
Kennedy
As time passed, I came to love the idea of having a boy. In all honesty, the thought of a tiny mini-me running around, just about gave me an anxiety attack. A mini Zac...well, that was another story. I'd hope our baby boy would grow up to be as ambitious as his father, have his good looks and my wit. He'd need it someday to fight off the girls in pre-school, I just knew it.
Ally and I began the slow process of painting the baby's room, which was her old room. And although Zac wanted to go all out, suggesting we make it KISS themed, I finally put my foot down when he showed up with a couple of creepy Gene Simmons pacifier clips.
Instead, Ally and I decided on light grey for the walls, a few black and white photos and yellow-accent pillows. It wasn't anything exciting, but hell, he wouldn't be able to appreciate it until he was a few months old, anyway.
The crib arrived and Zac, being the guy that he was, made a party out of it, inviting Alex and Chris to help put it together. A few hours into the crib assembling party, Alex was pouring shots of tequila and Chris was passed out in my glider. Boys.
The only thing left to do before my baby shower, was to call my parents. I thought telling Ally was going to be the hardest thing I'd ever have to do, but telling my mom and dad I was almost six months pregnant, not married and the baby's father was in a band, was icing on a large, poorly designed cake.
I hadn't seen or talked to either of them in over a year. As far as I knew, they still lived together and I was actually shocked that I hadn't heard anything in the news about them killing each other...okay, that's pretty harsh, but it wasn't exactly like they were made for each other. They had fought constantly, and I knew they had separate living quarters within my childhood home. Funny, I'd lived minutes away from them everyday for the last four years, but not once had they ever reached out, stopped by or made an attempt to meet for lunch.
Ally suggested sending them a baby shower invitation to break the news, but as their only daughter, I wanted to tel
l them myself. They did raise me better than that.
As Zac sat by my side, with my hand in his, he squeezed it gently and I dialed my mom's cell number.
"Mom?" I asked when the line picked up, but she hadn't said a word yet.
"Hey, baby, how are you?" She was drunk. Awesome.
"Good, I've been good," I said and I could hear a commotion in the background. "Where are you?"
"Barbados, sweetie. It's lovely here, you should come." She was currently in the state of what I like to call a happy drunk. She may not remember what I was about to tell her, but at least I could finally get it over with.
"Cool. Hey look, Mom. I have some good news," I said.
More commotion and she laughed. "Mom? Can you hear me?"
"Sorry, sweetie, I'm here. What's the good news?" she laughed.
I shot Zac a wary glance and he squeezed my hand a little tighter. I took a deep breath before I spilled the beans.
"You're going to be a grandma," I said sweetly. "I'm pregnant."
"What?" There was that familiar tone I was accustomed to. The tone she used when she was about to turn into an angry drunk.
"Shit," I whispered under my breath.
"Kennedy, I think I may have had too many of these wonderful drinks, but I thought you said, you were pregnant. Did I hear that right?"
"Yeah, Mom. Gone and got myself knocked up," I scoffed.
I heard her huff and groan.
"And Zac Monroe is the father, we're not getting married and I'm six months along. I waited until now to tell you all this, because I knew this is the exact reaction I'd get from you. But at least now you know, so I'll just let you get back to your friends," I blurted, speaking faster than I'd ever had before, especially to her. A lump formed in my throat. What did I expect? She'd come running, offering motherly advice and baking me a cake?
"Doesn't surprise me," she said in a hushed tone. And it was that single comment, that brought tears to my eyes. "I guess it's too late to ask if you're going to keep the poor child. I'm sure your father would have your neck, Kennedy. Goddamn it, girl, you are so damned irresponsible. You better think long and hard about what you're doing, young lady. Go ahead and throw your life away, like you've always done, it seems to be the only thing you're good at, besides sleeping around."