“Great,” John said. “I’m glad that’s settled.”
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Zoe obsessed about what to wear to John’s. She should look nice but not sexy-nice. Definitely not sexy-nice. She wished to God she had a preppy little sundress—the kind that Julia and Bennett had closets full of. Hannah probably had a bunch of those kind of dresses too.
It was five after six and shopping wasn’t an option. She had to go with something in her closet. She sent Hannah two options and Hannah picked a cute skirt that Zoe had bought at the J.Crew outlet in Vermont the previous summer and a tank with a sheer blouse over it and tied at the waist.
She checked herself in the mirror one more time before leaving. She had gotten a pretty bad sunburn at Devon. One of the days she’d been out in the sun for hours helping Linda school Dakota and standing at the in-gate when she went in the ring. Usually Zoe had a riding helmet on—she wasn’t used to spending so much time in the sun without her helmet on and she’d fried her nose and forehead. Now, they still looked a little painful.
Why was she so nervous about going to his house? She wasn’t dating him; it didn’t matter if his parents liked her. Of course she wanted them to think that John continuing to partner with her professionally was a good idea but all that required was that she was mildly polite and no huge skeletons appeared from her past.
Their house was a small Cape. Cute and well tended with a little hedge surrounding the front lawn. They had one of those novelty mailboxes shaped like a dog, with a head and feet and a tail. A Golden Retriever to be exact. Judging by the size of their house, Zoe could understand why John had never had a competitive eq horse or been able to ride with a big name trainer. Their whole house could fit inside the kitchens of many riders on the circuit.
A real life golden retriever met her at the screen door.
“Hi, there.”
John put a hand on the dog’s collar and pushed open the screen door. “Come on in. This is Sutter. He’s Harry’s nemesis. Sutter gets his own mailbox and Harry gets nada.”
Zoe spent a few moments giving Sutter a bit of attention. He was a beautiful dog with a lighter colored coat.
“I see you met the welcome wagon,” Joanne said, joining them in the small entryway.
“Hi,” Zoe said. “Thanks for having me.”
Joanne looked a little less heroic outside of the barn, a little more like an average mom. Zoe noticed wrinkles at the corners of her eyes that hadn’t been as apparent in the dim light of the indoor.
In the kitchen Zoe met John’s dad. He had a full beard and stood at the stove in an apron. Zoe looked around the kitchen at the framed children’s artwork on the walls and the many family photographs stuck with magnets onto the fridge. It wasn’t a gleaming stainless steel fridge, just a simple white one, and Zoe found the fridge with all its photos oddly comforting, like it was almost another member of the family.
There was a colorful kitchen mat on the floor at the sink—a bright pattern of intersecting oranges and cherries. A bunch of bananas hung on one of those banana hangers on the counter, next to a coffee maker. All hallmarks of a normal family life—the kind Zoe had never had.
“Dan’s the cook in the family,” Joanne said.
Zoe was relieved that Joanne wasn’t a domestic goddess, in addition to being an amazing mother to a girl with a disability.
“I don’t cook anything fancy,” Dan said. “But I do cook.”
“I’m not like a foodie or anything,” Zoe said. “Give me a good burger and I’m a happy girl.”
“Perfect,” Dan said.
“Molly’s watching TV,” John said. “She can’t wait to see you.”
Zoe wondered why Molly hadn’t met her at the door and then felt dumb when she realized Molly couldn’t just walk from room to room on her own.
Zoe followed John to the family room where Sutter sat at Molly’s feet. Harry lay sprawled out on a dog bed in the corner. He didn’t lift his head; only barely opened his eyes.
“Hi, Molly,” Zoe said.
Molly looked uncharacteristically shy. Zoe noticed the braces on her legs. She didn’t wear them when she rode.
“Hi,” Molly said weakly.
Everything about John’s house was warm and welcoming and the family room was no exception. The plump couch had a blue and green plaid blanket over it, and a shelving unit held knick-knacks and books. Someone’s fleece jacket was thrown over the arm of a chair and a mug sat on the coffee table. The house told of a regular, comfortable family life—of four people who loved each other dearly. It made Zoe never want to leave. This was the house she wished she’d grown up.
“I really like your dog,” Zoe whispered, holding up her hand to her mouth, pretending to try to exclude John, “Don’t tell your brother but I think I like him better than Harry.”
“We all do,” Molly said.
“Wait a second,” John said. “I do not love Sutter more than Harry. Harry may be in the twilight of his life and not be able to be all perky and cute like Sutter but I love that old dog.” John got up and went to pat Harry. Harry closed his eyes and emitted a groan.
“How’d he get the name Sutter?” Zoe asked.
“From a movie,” Molly said.
“Wait, Sutter from The Spectacular Now?”
Molly’s face brightened and her shyness slipped away. “You know it?”
“Know it? It’s like my all time favorite.” Zoe turned to John. “You’ve seen it?”
“Yeah, it’s a good one,” John said.
“The part after the car wreck . . . when she asks if he’s okay? Oh my God, that part kills me every time.” Zoe held a hand to her chest.
“And what about when the store owner tells Sutter if he was his dad he’d lecture him and Sutter says if he was his dad—” Molly said.
Zoe stepped in, “He wouldn’t have to. One of the best movies. And I love the name Sutter. Great choice for your dog.”
Of course Zoe couldn’t help but think how Sutter was also McNair’s last name, the grand prix rider Hannah had ill advisedly slept with.
“Thanks,” Molly said.
Dinner was pork chops with a salad. “It’s not a burger . . .” Dan said as they all sat down in the dining room.
“I love pork chops,” Zoe said.
“Good,” Dan replied, offering her a genuine smile.
Zoe noticed that Molly’s pork chop had already been cut into tiny pieces. It was hard not to watch Molly work so hard at piercing each piece with her fork and maneuvering it to her mouth. The tiny details of life Zoe took for granted were all challenges for her.
Joanne asked how Devon went. Zoe was somewhat surprised Joanne knew she had gone.
“Good, Dakota got ribbons in the eq and the hunters and she actually won a low junior jumper class.” She turned to John. “Did you ever show at Devon?”
He shook his head and she wished she hadn’t asked. She should have known he hadn’t ever gone.
“You were best child rider there a few times, right?” he said. She couldn’t tell if he was trying to show her off in front of his parents.
“Only once,” Zoe said.
“Zoe, we are so happy you’ve been helping John with the horses,” Joanne said.
Zoe wiped her mouth. “Me too.” She glanced at Dan. “This is delicious, by the way.”
“John’s such a good rider, well, at least we think so,” Joanne continued. “But it always seemed so hard to break through to the top level. John says you’ve done it all . . . won at the best shows. How did you find your way to the top like that?”
“I kind of grew up on the circuit,” Zoe said. “My mom had a barn and it’s like the only thing I’ve ever known.”
“Do you love it like Johnny?”
Johnny. That was too cute. Zoe looked over at him. He made a face back at her.
“I do love it. I can’t imagine doing anything else.”
“But you love showing more than I do,” John said. “I mean you really l
ove being in the ring.”
Zoe swallowed a bite of salad. “I guess I do. I’m not sure what that says about me really. That I’m a show-off or a diva or something?” She wished she hadn’t used the word diva. John’s parents probably thought all show circuit riders were total divas.
“Someone has to want to be the lead in the school musical,” Dan said. “I’m not sure there’s anything wrong with that.”
“I guess in that scenario I’d be one of the people working on the set?” John said.
“Or the director,” Joanne put in. “Did you go to college?”
“I’m only nineteen,” Zoe said. “And, no. I didn’t.” She looked down at her plate. Surely his family would think less of her for not having even tried college.
“She always knew what she wanted to do with her life,” John said.
He was clearly trying to help her out and maybe defend his own choice a little too.
“Zoe likes The Spectacular Now,” Molly said, a little out of nowhere.
“I do, I love that movie,” Zoe said, happy for the change in subject. “I’m a big movie fan in general. I love the totally sappy romantic ones.”
“That’s where Sutter’s name came from,” Joanne said.
Zoe smiled. “That’s what Molly said.”
Joanne passed the bread basket over to Zoe. “We watch a lot of movies. I mean just here in the house. If you like movies, you should join us sometime.”
“What about tonight?” Molly said.
“We all have to get up for work tomorrow,” Dan said. “And you have school.”
“Molly goes to an alternative school program,” Joanne explained.
“John’s told me about it. It sounds great.”
“It is, right, Molly?” Joanne said.
“I like it a lot. Not as good as watching movies, though.”
“I’d love to come back and watch a movie sometime,” Zoe said.
“Maybe this weekend?” Molly asked.
“That’d be great for me.”
Zoe helped do the dishes. She tried to do a good job and not bang plates on the sink or drop silverware on the floor. She didn’t have much experience in the kitchen, cooking or cleaning, but rinsing dishes and sticking them in a dishwasher couldn’t be all that much harder than cleaning tack.
“Just load them in the dishwasher,” Joanne said when she caught Zoe furiously scrubbing a plate like it was a snaffle with crud on it. “It’ll get all the hard stuff off.”
“Okay.” Zoe finished loading up the dishwasher. Was she supposed to turn it on? Joanne must have seen her looking at the unit. “We’ll turn it on later. It’s not the quietest machine.”
Zoe dried her hands on a dishtowel and rehung it on its hook. She went to the bathroom to make sure soap hadn’t floated up into her hair, or something embarrassing like that.
Joanne caught Zoe as she was coming out of the bathroom. She seemed to be waiting for her, hoping to get her alone. “Thank you for helping Johnny out.”
Zoe checked nearby for John before she spoke. The house seemed so small that you could be in any room and someone would overhear you. “Oh my God, he’s helping me just as much. Linda doesn’t really have horses I can show and, well, as John said, I kind of like being in the ring.”
“But you took a chance on him. I know he’s not at the same level as you . . . we couldn’t afford to send him to a big barn. I never really thought he’d stick with this and do it for a living. I guess if we’d known he’d choose this as his profession maybe we would have tried harder to somehow get him on the A circuit. Who knew he would love it this much?”
“He’s got a great eye for a horse. He’s a good rider too.”
She lowered her voice. “You think he can make a living doing what he’s doing? Selling horses?”
“Plenty of people do. I mean, it’s not like you’re going to make millions and I’m not going to say the lifestyle is super cushy, but people do make a living out of it.”
“I want him to do what he loves . . .” she said. “But I also want him to be able to have a decent life doing it. So far the money’s going out and not much has come in. How long does it usually take to sell a horse?”
“Totally depends on the horse and so many other factors really.”
“Well, I just appreciate you helping him.”
“Really, he’s helping me just as much.”
“Then let’s just say I’m glad you two found each other.” She looked at Zoe with what seemed like almost a twinkle in her eye. Did she think they were together? Hadn’t John made it clear that they weren’t?
“There is one thing,” Zoe said. “To sell horses you really have to go to some away shows. Did John say anything about Lake Placid?”
Joanne shook her head.
“He thinks he can’t go because you guys need him too much. And if you do, then I totally understand that, but what you just said about wanting to support his career more . . .”
“We can definitely manage. Johnny’s such a good boy. He needs to put himself first more often but that doesn’t come naturally to him, I guess.”
“I hope you don’t think I’m trying to take him away from your family,” Zoe said.
“No,” Joanne said. “I appreciate you telling me.”
Zoe went back into the family room, hoping to find John there. She asked Molly where he’d gone.
“He’s taking the garbage out.”
Zoe spotted him through the window, opening the barrel and throwing the trash bag in. She went out the screen door as he was coming back in.
“Trying to make a run for it?” he said.
“No, I was coming to see if you needed any help.”
He brushed his hands together. “All set. Was this bearable?”
“I never want to leave, actually.”
He looked at her funny. “Seriously?”
“Seriously. I love your family. It’s like the family I’ve always wanted.”
“Okay,” he said, still regarding her with a bit of a perplexed expression. “I saw my mom corner you before I went out. Did she tell you how she wishes I’d give up horses and go back to college?”
“No, she said she wishes she’d supported your riding more when you were a junior. If she’d known that you were going to do it for a living, she might have tried harder to get you riding with someone more big-time.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, that’s what she said.”
“I don’t want her to feel badly,” he said. “She and my dad have done so much for me and Molly.”
“I guess good parents always wish they could do more for their kids,” Zoe said, although she really didn’t know the first thing about that personally. Her mother barely ever called her and when she did it was to get a horse sold. When everything had happened in Florida, her response was, “Do you know what this could do to my business? Who’s gonna want to buy a horse from me now?”
“I thought people feel parents today do too much for their kids,” John pointed out.
“Maybe there’s a balance. I mean look at Dakota’s parents. They do all the wrong things for her. You wouldn’t have wanted parents like that.”
“No,” John said. “I’m happy with the ones I got.”
Zoe glanced back at the house. It was nearly dark outside and it looked so homey with the glow coming from the light inside. “Well, I guess I should go in and say good-bye.”
“So you’re not moving in permanently?” he said.
“Haha.”
Zoe thanked Joanne and Dan and promised Molly they’d do a movie night soon. Joanne gave her a hug, squeezing her shoulders and not just errantly pressing against her.
Zoe walked slowly on her way out of the house, not wanting to go and leave the warmth and light there behind. It honestly might have been the nicest place she’d ever spent time.
She felt tears springing to her eyes. They were the kind of unexpected tears that hit you all of a sudden—a moment when you’re not s
upposed to be crying but there you are, doing it. She tried to tuck her head down a little so John wouldn’t notice but he did.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” She wiped away one teardrop that had slipped out. “I just had a really nice time, that’s all.”
“You can come back anytime. We’ll do the movie night.”
“I know,” Zoe said, her voice still catching. “Just ignore me. Maybe I’m hormonal. It’s like one of those crazy female moments.” She hoped she could brush her tears off by making a joke. Usually guys forgave women if you just told them it was a female thing. It might negate years of effort by women trying to be treated equally but sometimes it had to be done.
She went to put her hand on the screen door and he put his hand over hers. “Are you okay to go home? I mean maybe you should just stay awhile longer?”
He set his gaze on her and they stood there, his hand on hers. There had to be something between them. It couldn’t just be her imagination.
“I’m okay,” she said. “I’ll see you at the barn.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
One of the next times Zoe came to John’s to ride she found him in the ring watching a kid trot around on Dibs. What must have been the kid’s trainer was standing next to John.
Zoe didn’t want to interrupt so she went into the barn and started grooming Gidget. A few minutes later, the three of them walked up to the barn.
“Thanks,” the trainer said. “We’ll be in touch.”
Zoe had never seen the trainer before—she must have been a real local. She had full seat breeches on and really poorly-fitting dress boots, which meant she probably didn’t do many big shows. The girl with her had one of those helmet covers in hot pink.
After they’d left, Zoe said, “How’d that go?”
“Let’s see, a young, green hunter for a girl who started riding a year ago? Probably not the best match.”
“Yikes,” Zoe said.
“I should have just told them no the minute they got here. I can’t tell you how many tire-kickers I get. It’s like people have nothing better to do than go around trying horses that are completely wrong for them. Some are so bad I just say no over the phone but you want to sell the horse . . . speaking of, I’m in for Lake Placid.”
Hunter Derby: (Show Circuit Series -- Book 3) Page 12