by K. S. Thomas
“Yes, I’m seeing someone. No, it’s none of your fucking business. Handle your own shitty marriage before you come sticking your nose into my love life.” Well, so much for not saying anything.
“What the hell do you know about my marriage?” She was climbing down from her barstool and stalking over on her six inch heels. Shoes she clearly couldn’t walk in. No big shocker considering she probably didn’t wear anything outside of Crocs every day at the hospital she worked at.
“Just forget I said anything, alright? Let’s just both agree that when it comes to our relationships, we stay out of each other’s business.” I didn’t wait for her to answer. Nor did I continue my conversation with Angel. I had more pressing matters to deal with. Namely finding a date on short notice that wouldn’t have any expectations beyond strolling down the red carpet and making me look like a pussy loving heterosexual.
Given the limited privacy around this place, I opted for Derek’s usual go-to. The balcony. Since Sammy was here in person, I figured he wouldn’t be needing it.
I scrolled through the contact list in my phone, but most of the names popping up were completely useless. Either I hadn’t spoken to them in years or, they were on the wrong continent. This was of course, after I’d ruled out all the ones who were the wrong sex.
Then, I landed in the F’s and hit on my own personal jackpot.
I swiped call before I could think about it too much and realize how fucking stupid of a move I was about to make.
“This shit better be important.” Francis was still half asleep.
“It’s Royce.”
“Yeah, I know. I have fucking caller I.D. Why do you think I answered?” I could hear her moving around in her bed, the shuffling of blankets and pillows rustled loudly in my ear.
“If I didn’t know you were always this pleasant, I’d guess you weren’t a morning person,” I teased.
“Oh Royce, how you jest. Do you actually have a fucking point or are you just calling to make sure I get as little fucking sleep as possible? I mean, Ava was already on top of that what with the list of shit she had me do on my red eye flight out here, but fuck, why not keep the good times rolling? I only have to finalize all the most important details of your EMA appearance this evening.” Her massive skills of sarcasm were but a minor part of why Francis fit into our fucked up family so nicely.
“Speaking of the EMAs. Want to be my date tonight?”
“Sure. Why the fuck not?” And that was the other. She lived by the same code we all did. If a friend needed you, you said yes, no questions asked.
“Now get some sleep for fuck’s sake. I don’t want to go strolling down the red carpet with something that wandered off the set of The Walking Dead.”
She laughed. “Yeah, okay. Later, asshole.” And Francis hung up before I could return the insult.
I slid the phone back into my pocket and turned around to face the door. One obstacle cleared and one more to go. Somehow I’d have to explain to Hudson why I was taking Francis as my date. Especially considering he would be there as well.
I started to head inside to face him when I began to fictionalize the entire situation. And by fictionalize, I mean I lied to myself. Bold faced lies. Terrible lies only the most gullible person on earth would believe. Well, that was me. And I knew that. Which was precisely why I told myself these lies.
Starting with the one where I convinced myself Hudson didn’t really need to know that Francis was going to be my date. He was going as the band photographer, who was to say that she wouldn’t be included as part of the band’s management team? I bought it. I also didn’t bat an eye when I went on to tell myself that really, Hudson wouldn’t be upset even if he did find out, since we’d already agreed not to go public about our relationship and I clearly couldn’t be the only one there without a date. So really, I was doing the right thing by taking Francis. A friend. A fill in. A completely innocent arrangement which couldn’t possible hurt anyone.
Anyone except myself and the one person I would have walked over shards of glass for if it kept him from feeling any pain. Just, you know, not in public.
As soon as I stepped back inside, I found myself in the middle of a new shit-storm altogether, so talking myself out of my pathetic new plan to have a secret date right in front of Hudson was no longer an issue. Breaking up a catfight between Sammy and Ava was suddenly bumped up to the top slot on my to-do list.
“What the fuck is going on?” I came back into the suite to find Blaise with both arms wrapped around Ava’s waist as she lunged herself toward Sammy, who wasn’t being restrained by anyone. Unfortunately.
“This lunatic just accused me of hitting on her husband.” Ava swung out with her right fist, barely missing Sammy’s face.
“Please. I saw the way you were looking at him when the two of you walked in here.” She tipped her head toward Derek, lasers shooting from her bulging eye balls. “Tell me, does Blaise know you’re fucking his girlfriend?”
Ava screamed out loud and Blaise had to use his entire body weight to anchor her in place. “Would you do something? Fuck! This is insane!”
But Derek just stood there, pitifully frozen in place and looking slightly guilty. Although, I suspected it had less to do with Sammy’s accusations and more with the fact that secretly he was probably rooting for Ava to beat the shit out of her.
“Sammy,” I cut in between them, “don’t you think we’d all know if Derek and Ava were fucking?”
“Oh, I don’t doubt that you all know. Probably having a good laugh at my expense every time it happens. I mean, why else would everyone have been so shocked to see me here this morning?” Now she was getting in my face too, which incidentally only pissed Ava off more.
Before she could launch another attack, Blaise managed to spin her around and start her moving away from Sammy and toward their room. They were halfway there when Angel and Hudson came in through the main door.
“It’s about damn time you two showed up again. How the hell long does it take to shoot a fucking picture?” Blaise didn’t wait for an answer from either one of them before he lifted Ava into their room and slammed the door shut behind him.
“What’s going on?” Angel came toward our little gathering with Hudson right behind him. I assumed he’d met Sammy at some point while I’d been out on the balcony talking to Francis.
“Ava is banging my husband, that’s what!” Sammy spat.
Leave it to Angel to actually laugh in her face. “Yeah, okay.”
“Whatever. I wouldn’t expect you to tell me the truth. You assholes all stick together anyway.” She was gesturing at all of us, including Derek who still stood by without saying a single fucking word. Apparently she’d already used up every ounce of fight the man had in him. No big revelation there. Derek was about the most peace loving motherfucker around. But I guess you didn’t come across a whole lot of Libra’s who weren’t pro harmony.
“I’d tell you the truth.” Hudson’s eyes darted back and forth between Angel and I, and he corrected himself, “I mean, they’re all telling you the truth, but I would have no reason to stick up for Derek or Ava.”
Sammy scoffed. “Aren’t you the guy banging Royce these days? Ava’s little bitch? Yeah, I’m sure you’d be all too happy to sell her out. Not!”
Hudson ignored her, staying his usual mellow self in spite of her derogatory comments. His reaction actually helped keep mine in check, because I was ready to fucking pounce on her ass. I didn’t care if she was a chick or not.
“Fine. Don’t take my word for it. See for yourself.” Hudson walked toward her, holding his camera and scrolling through the images until he found what he was looking for. “Here. Took these just last night. You really think a guy this miserable is having sex with anyone?”
In an instant, Sammy’s entire demeanor changed. She practically ripped Hudson’s camera from his hands. “When last night?”
Hudson stared at Derek uncomfortably. “After he got off the phone with yo
u. I wouldn’t have taken the picture at all, but there was something so beautiful and raw about the emotion. And then the moon in the background. I’m really sorry, dude. It was a total invasion of privacy.”
I didn’t even think about it. All it took was the sincerity in his eyes and his tender, genuine tone to make me want to stand beside him. Claim him. I’d never meet another man like him. I knew that. I fucking knew it in my gut, at the core of my being, and in that moment, I cast aside all of my idiotic inabilities to show any sort of affection to the man I loved, and I took two strides toward him and clasped his hand in mine. Tightly.
Meanwhile, Derek was too tired to give a shit about anything anymore. Least of all a picture. Certainly not when that very picture was now putting a stop to the precise insanity causing him his state of total exhaustion in the first place.
“It’s fine, man. You were just doing your job. I could have gone to my room. I’m the one burdening everyone with all of my drama all the goddamn time, it’s almost nice to know someone was able to do something creative with it for a change. I certainly haven’t been able to. If I write one more song about a motherfucking whiny ass sap crying in his fucking cornflakes, I’m going to break my own fucking fingers just to keep from being able to play it.”
Then, because the bitch was clearly certifiably insane, Sammy ran to Derek, wrapped both arms around his neck and crammed her tongue into his mouth like she was some skank on Jerry Springer. Considering the dude had been living like a fucking monk, he wasn’t about to stop her. So, as one does with wild unpredictable beasts, the rest of us carefully backed out of the room while she was distracted.
“That was really cool what you did in there, Hudson.” Angel patted him on the shoulder as he split off to go into his room.
“It really wasn’t anything. You know the saying, a picture is worth a thousand words? Figured it would be beneficial to all of us to see if that was true.” He grinned.
Angel just nodded. Then let his eyes drop down to where Hudson’s hand was still pressed firmly to mine. “Yeah. That part was cool, too.” He winked at me just as he was closing his door.
“What was that about?” Hudson made a face.
“I think you just got the official welcome to the Finding Nolan family. Not sure if I should hug you or tell you to make a run for it.” I was joking, but he stayed totally serious.
“Or...you could kiss me.” Any other time, the words would have been accompanied by the actions and he would have already been leaning in to make a move. Except this time he didn’t. It was like he suddenly understood what Angel had meant. Like he knew exactly what he was asking me to do. Because it wasn’t about kissing him the same way I had a hundred times over in the last few weeks. It was about kissing him out in the open. And maybe it was nuts that I would even hesitate for a fucking second in the privacy of our own suite with only the people I trusted most in the world around, and yet, I did. I hesitated. Then, just as he began to step back, I closed my eyes and crushed my mouth to his.
***
Royce kissed me, but it was too fucking late. I’d seen it. Seen the hesitation in his face. Seen the exchange between him and Angel. It was more than just having an aversion to showing affection publicly. It was about showing me affection publicly.
And publicly wasn’t even outside of the four walls we called home while on the road. Apparently the only place Royce was actually in love with me was inside our bedroom, which brought some really fucking uncomfortable highlights of previous conversations with Ava and pimping back into my mind.
But then I felt his hand slide down my back, drawing me to him. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I was being paranoid. Maybe it had nothing to do with me and more to do with Sammy and her drama with Derek. Having her here had certainly made for an unpleasant shift in the energy around the suite. And Royce wouldn’t be the only one feeling uneasy because of it. I mean, the place had cleared the fuck out, shortly after her arrival. Even before the fight between her and Ava broke out, Angel had been all too eager to drag me out to the roof to get some crazy shots of him doing handstands with the skyline in the background. I’d thought it was weird until I looked through my lens. That shit was going to be badass when I got it developed.
The more I thought about it, the more I convinced myself that Royce had just been on edge because of the previous showdown, and the look from Angel, well, maybe it had been exactly what Royce had said, a sense of accepting that I was there to stay. That he and I were a unit now. By the time he was backing me into our own room, it all made perfect sense to me. Except for that one nagging thought, that the truth rarely needed much convincing of.
Chapter 14
In the interest of keeping the peace, we all stayed in our own rooms for as long as possible. It wasn’t until Ava came through, banging on everyone’s door, shouting about the car being there shortly to take us to the awards that everyone slowly but surely came creeping back out.
Angel was sitting lazily in the recliner when Hudson and I joined him in the living room.
“How long you been out here?”
He shrugged and pointed the remote at the TV to turn it off. “All fucking morning. Came back in here after everyone cleared out. Figured between make up sex, post cat-fight sex and whatever man on man action you two were getting into, I’d have the living room to myself for a while.”
I was going to explain to Angel that man on man action was also considered sex when Sammy came strolling out of Derek’s room and headed straight for Ava.
“Ava?”
She cocked her head slightly to the side, her ‘I don’t really give shit face’ already in place. “What?”
“I just wanted to say I’m really sorry. I was freaking out when I got here and everyone was so weird about it. I didn’t realize how much our problems were affecting the whole band. It’s just been a really rough year for Derek and I. Anyway, I just wanted to apologize.” Even though she’d said all the right words, it didn’t mean shit. And one look at Ava told me she’d felt the same way.
Rather than say so, she countered Sammy’s counterfeit speech with one of her own. “It’s fine. Really. I should have been more understanding. I knew this tour was taking its toll on you guys. I shouldn’t have jumped all over you for an accusation we all knew was just a cry for help on your part.”
It was patronizing and completely insincere, but unless Sammy wanted to blow her own mock apology to shit, she had no choice but to take it and smile. Which she did.
“Oh good. Both my favorite girls are getting along again.” Derek came up behind Sammy and wrapped his arms around her waist. It was only about the dumbest fucking thing he could have said given the circumstances. Even ‘foot permanently lodged in his mouth’ Nolan knew that.
“Are you fucking kidding? What, like they’re sister wives now? How about you don’t claim both of them after one just accused the other of banging you. K?” Blaise scowled at him as he went to plant a sloppy kiss on the top of Ava’s head.
Then, because shit was already unraveling at a nice and steady pace, the penthouse door opened and in came Francis with Petra right behind her.
“What’s up party people? Check out the hot little number I picked up in the lobby.” She stopped when she spotted Angel. “She’s probably more you’re type than mine though, so I guess I’ll let you have her, Angel.”
“So very generous of you.” He grinned as he stood up from his seat to properly greet his date. While the two proceeded to play a game of oral twister for a solid minute, Francis made the rounds saying hi to the rest of us. Then, when Angel finally broke free from Petra’s mouth, he apparently felt he needed to extend a proper, albeit delayed, welcome to Francis as well. She was barely out of his reach when he leaned in toward her.
“Whoa, dude. I don’t know what sort of expectations you have of the women who walk into this room, but I’ll stick with a fucking handshake if it’s all the same to you.”
Francis actually held out her hand and the expres
sion on Angel’s face was enough to have us all rolling. Well, almost everyone. The only person who was noticeably unamused, was Sammy. Her mouth was twisted up so tightly you’d think she just stuck her nose in the ass end of a skunk. It had to sting watching Francis stroll in and be treated like she belonged when Sammy was now unofficially and unpleasantly outside of the inner circle. Especially considering she was married into the family and Francis was no more to her than the hired help.
“Meanwhile, you all know the fucking car is downstairs waiting, right?” Francis said dryly, in her usual state of totally annoyed. She was like the real life version of MTV’s Daria. Except with darker hair and no glasses. Same damn expression and monotone voice though. Not to mention, outstanding sense of humor.
“Yes!” Ava started waving her arms around in her usual attempt to herd us to her will. It worked. Naturally.
We all made it into the Escalade limo without any further drama induced obstacles and even though I wound up sandwiched between Francis and Hudson, he didn’t seem too concerned about her presence as of yet. Unlike Ava, who continued to stare at me while making odd movements with her mouth and eyebrows I’m sure were a side effect of her attempts to communicate with me via telepathy. Something she had as of yet not mastered, but insisted she would be able to eventually. According to her, people could only live in close quarters for so long before their brainwaves started to overlap and match up. I told her she was confusing brain waves with menstrual cycles, but she insisted they were close enough.
And maybe they were, because the reality was, in spite of my best efforts to shut out her accusations via mental telepathy, I could hear her voicing each and every one of them loud and clear. I responded the same way I always did. By ignoring her completely.
Then. BOOM. My little self-made bomb blew up right in my face.
“So, girlfriend, how do you want to play this? Am I like your ‘date’ date? Or just a body to fill the seat beside you. I mean, I notice I didn’t get a corsage or anything - not that I’m complaining, but a girl has hopes, you know?” Francis waved her empty wrist around, glancing at it wistfully.