“I need to show Amanda where she will be staying.” He held out his hand, waiting for me to grasp it.
“She can stay with me.”
Kavvan never acknowledged Susan as he waited for me to take his hand.
I placed my hand in his, stood, swayed, and almost fell from the dizziness. Kavvan scooped me up in a fluid motion and cradled me against his chest. “Thanks,” I said as I closed my eyes, hoping the room would stop spinning.
The soft fabric of his jumpsuit, the rise and fall of his chest as my cheek rested there, listening to the sound of his heartbeat… It was so peaceful, and I felt safe. Protected. With the alcohol coursing through my veins, I let all my worries slip away.
The bed was soft; I grabbed a pillow and snuggled deeper into the covers. I was vaguely aware that the bed dipped, an arm came across my waist, and Kavvan pulled me tight against his body. With a kiss to the top of my head, I heard him say, “Goodnight, Amanda.”
Kavvan
After transferring the other females to the Galatin, I found my mate, along with the other females, drunk on Fire’s Breath. I couldn’t leave Amanda in such a vulnerable state, and even fearing later repercussions, I carried her to my quarters. Snuggling up with Amanda in the bed was both painful and satisfying. My shaft roared to life with the feel of her in my arms, but all I could do was hold her while she slept. I couldn’t help but stare at her beautiful body, her half-parted pink lips as she lay there asleep. Her black, wavy hair fell over one shoulder and then fanned out on the pillow. How could anyone have abused someone so delicate?
Using the tips of my fingers, I swept her hair away from her face and memorized every inch of it. “I’m sorry,” I whispered as my thumb skimmed her cheek. After one last look, I pulled her close, tucked her head under my chin, and drifted off to sleep.
I awoke to sound of my comm unit beeping. With one arm, I reached over and shut it off. Whoever it was could wait. Amanda had her sundress bunched up around her waist, and one leg had flung across mine sometime during the night. One arm draped across my chest.
Amanda’s eyelashes fluttered, she lifted her head, and her dark, almost black eyes locked with mine. “Morning,” she muttered as she untangled herself from me.
“Good morning, Amanda.” I greeted her with a smile.
“Did I stay here with you last night?” She sat up on the side of the bed and adjusted her dress.
“You did.”
“Why?” She turned troubled eyes on me and I winced.
“You had too much to drink.”
“Yeah, I know. My head is killing me.”
“I can take you to see Sora.”
“No, that’s okay. I can live with it.” She glanced around my quarters and asked, “Where’s Susan?”
“In her quarters.” Sliding out of bed, I walked over and knelt in front of her. Taking her hand, I admitted, “I’m sorry I didn’t ask your permission, but I have to be near you.”
She scrunched her nose. “Why?”
“Do you not feel the pull between us?”
“I do, but…” she looked down at our clasped hands before catching my gaze once again. “Susan likes you. She thinks that the two of you have something, and I can’t do anything to hurt her. I won’t.”
“I know that human females don’t share.” Amanda tilted her head in confusion. Sish! Azziar has several human females, it’s easy to forget that Amanda knows nothing about our culture. At least there is no female waiting for me to return. “I am not interested in your friend. You are my mate.”
“You didn’t find Susan attractive? Tell her that you wouldn’t take advantage of her?”
“Yes, but that was before I found you.”
“Because of my smell?”
“Yes, among other things.” Where was she going with this? Finding a true mate was a joyous occasion to be celebrated.
Amanda slowly withdrew her hand from mine and flashed a sad smile. “You’re better off with Susan.”
“No.”
“Yes, you are. You don’t want someone like me. Trust me.” She stood, walked to the bathing room, and shut the door.
I sat staring at the closed door before deciding I needed help. I dressed and headed out of my quarters. I needed to talk to her friend and get us both some food.
“Come in,” Susan called in a raspy voice. When I stepped inside, she looked up from where she lay on the couch. “Hey, Kavvan.”
“Susan.” I took a seat in the chair, facing her. “I need to speak with you.”
She slowly sat up on the couch. Her hair sticking up everywhere; she was still wearing the wrinkled dress. “Where’s Amanda?”
“In my quarters.”
“What?” She grabbed the sides of her head. “Shit, that hurts.”
“Do I need to take you to see Sora?”
“No,” she hissed. “You can tell me why the fuck Amanda is in your quarters.”
“She is my true mate, but I don’t know what to do.” I held her heavy stare. “I need your help.”
Susan sat there in silence. The weight of the air settled on my shoulders, not knowing if she would help or explode over the situation.
“What did you do to her?” Her eyes shot lasers at me.
“Nothing. I didn’t do anything. This morning, she said that I was better off with you.” My eyes implored her to help me.
Susan sighed, raked her fingers through her hair, trying to get some of the tangles out. “Fine. I’ll help.” I sat forward, rested my elbows on my knees and waited for her to speak. “Amanda’s mom was a bitch. All she ever did was berate Amanda, telling her she wasn’t good enough, and that no one would ever want her. I mean, if your own mom and dad didn’t want you, then why would anyone else?”
“That’s what she thinks?”
“Yeah. Over the years, I’ve tried to build up her self-esteem, but it was hard when her mother was always tearing her down, telling her otherwise. Then there’s the men.”
I clenched my jaw tight as anger threatened to explode inside me. “What males?”
“Her mom always had men over. I don’t know if they took drugs, Amanda would never really say. But her mom had a different man every week. When she would pass out, sometimes, the men would find their way to Amanda’s room.”
“Did they…” I swallowed hard, afraid of the answer. But I needed to know.
“No. One man almost did, but he passed out right before he…” Susan looked away. “After that, I gave her a bat to keep at her bed.”
I let off a sigh of relief. Even though I didn’t understand the word bat, it had to be a form of protection. “And the scars?”
I watched as Susan’s face twisted in hate. “That bitch would put her cigarettes out on Amanda to teach her a lesson!” She inhaled deeply. “That shit stopped, too! Especially as she grew older. The bat helped.”
I didn’t know what cigarettes were, either, but I could imagine. “Why did no one ever intervene?”
“Amanda kept it hidden. And, sometimes, foster care is much worse than the current situation.”
I hated to ask Susan, but I needed to know. “Did the Travistion… did he…”
“Did the alien rape her?”
I nodded.
“No, you got there in time.”
A small sigh of relief escaped.
“Look, Kavvan. You have been nothing by nice to me, so I’ll help you. But,” she held my gaze, “don’t think Amanda is weak. She’s one of the strongest people I know.”
I nodded. “Thank you.” I pushed up from the chair, needing to get some food for everyone.
“You’re welcome.” Susan collapsed back down on the couch and closed her eyes. Food will make both of them feel better.
9
____________________
Decision Time
Amanda
“There you are!”
“Amanda?” Susan raised her head slightly off the couch before letting it drop back down. “What are you doing here?”
I shot
her an annoyed look as I walked by. “Glad to see you, too.”
“Sorry,” she said, slowly sitting up.
I hurried to the mirror in the bed room. “You’ve got to see this!” I turned my head sharply, peering over my shoulder into the mirror to look at my back. “The scars are gone. He said they were, but… Oh my God! I didn’t really believe him!”
“What?” Susan raced to where I stood, grabbed my arm, and turned it over. “Wow!”
“I know. When I noticed they were healed, I had to show you.” I grinned. “You should’ve seen the strange looks I got when I asked where to find your room.” I twisted back and forth, just staring at myself. “I just can’t believe it.”
Susan smiled at me in the mirror. “Their technology is amazing. You look stunning, Amanda.”
“I do not.” The smile on my face wouldn’t go away. After so many years, the scars were gone. Not even a hint of them remained.
After of moment of silence, Susan started, “Kavvan came by this morning.” I never met her eyes, I just stared at my flawless skin, still amazed as I turned one way and the then the other. “He said you stayed with him last night and that you are his true mate.” When I wouldn’t acknowledge she’d even spoken, Susan placed a hand on my shoulder. “Look, Amanda. I just liked him because he was so nice to me. It’s no biggie if you’re into him.” I turned around and faced my friend. She grinned, “Besides, have you seen how sexy every Azziarin is on this ship?”
I smiled slightly, meeting her eyes. “They are all built, aren’t they? I don’t think I’ve seen an ounce of fat on any of them.”
“I wonder if their women look the same?”
“God, I hope not! Who would want to compete with that all the time?”
“What are you talking about?” Susan waved my comment away. “You’ve always been gorgeous. Kavvan thinks so.” She waggled her eyebrows.
I flashed her a smile, walked to the chair, and plopped down, defeated. “I’m no good for him. He’s better off with someone like you.”
Susan sat on the couch, facing me. “Amanda, you are beautiful. Any man would be crazy not to want you.”
I looked away, not wanting to hear it. Every man was the same. They might stay around for a while, but eventually, they all leave. I’d seen it enough times with my mother, and I carried the same genes. “Whatever,” I scoffed. “I need a shower. Do you know how to work it?”
“Yes. Let me get you some clothes.”
“Thanks. I tried to turn it on in Kavvan’s bathroom, but I couldn’t figure the darn thing out. And I wasn’t about to ask him.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
She handed me another dress, turned on the water, and a shot me a smile as she walked out. I watched her leave before climbing in and standing under the warm spray. With the water drenching my hair, I thought over what Susan had said. Could I really have everything my mother didn’t? Could good men really exist? I scoffed. I doubt it. Maybe. I didn’t know. There was no denying that I was extremely attracted to him. With Susan giving me the go-ahead, could I let this chance at happiness slip by?
After quickly washing, I dressed and brushed my hair and teeth. When I stepped out of the bathroom, my eyes locked with Kavvan’s. Time stood still. He closed the distance, and with one arm, he pulled me tight against his body. His lips skimmed my ear. My breath caught. “I can smell your desire, Amanda.”
I closed my eyes, savoring the feel of his body pressed tight to mine. Just as I was about to snake my arms around his neck, lost in my sea of desire, Susan started hitting him on the back with the palm of her hand. “What is wrong with you? Let her go!”
Kavvan growled low before he released me. I let out a frustrated laugh. I knew Susan thought she was protecting me, and I loved her for it. But damn it, she had bad timing.
“Kavvan brought breakfast. Let’s eat.” She turned on her heels and headed for the chair.
My eyes locked with Kavvan’s again, and I could see his desire shining back at me. For the first time, I felt… hope.
~~~~~
“Wow!” I hurried to the floor-to-ceiling window and stared at space.
Clara came up beside me and pressed her hands to the glass, staring wide-eyed. “This is amazing!”
Jane came up beside Clara and smiled at her. When Clara looked over at her friend and smiled, Jane said, “I can’t believe this view.”
Susan sat down on a sofa facing the window. “What do you think Azziar will be like?”
“Hmm, I don’t know.” Mental note. Ask Kavvan about it.
Jane walked over and plopped down next to Susan. “Nikkul said it’s their cold season right now, but not for long. They still have blooming flowers.”
“So it’s almost spring?”
Shaking her head, Jane continued. “I don’t know what other seasons they have. He just said that the other human females like to sit in the royal garden.”
“How many others are there?”
“Hmm… let me think.” She started counting on her fingers and mouthing people’s names. “I can’t remember exactly. Maybe five or six? I do remember he said there are a few human children and one man.”
“A man?” I asked. “How on earth did a man end up on Azziar? I thought the aliens only stole women.”
Jane shrugged. “I don’t think Nikkul knows exactly.”
Clara turned and faced everyone. “Well, I’m excited to see what it’s like.”
“Are you always so happy, Clara?” I grinned at her enthusiasm.
A dark look briefly passed over her face before it disappeared. “Why wouldn’t I be?” I noticed the worry on Jane’s face as she stared at Clara and knew there was a story there. But I wouldn’t press it.
We talked about family, where we grew up, and what we were doing when the invasion happened.
“Susan was at work, and I was at our apartment studying. When I heard a loud noise, I jumped up, pulled the curtain back, and could see the smoke rising in the distance. Another explosion and a building crumbled. I thought it was a terrorist attack until I watched the shuttlecrafts fill the dusky sky. Susan raced home. We threw clothes into a suitcase and hightailed it out of the city for a while.”
“I got us caught.” Susan admitted.
“Don’t worry about. It seems to have turned out okay.” I shot her a grin and waggled my eyebrows while thinking about Kavvan.
“I was out with a friend. After hearing the loud explosion, I raced home. Mom and Dad had a fallout shelter to protect us from tornados. Who would’ve thought we would use it for an alien attack? Anyway…” Clara scoffed and swallowed the tears in her throat. It was the first time I’d seen her so emotional. “When I got home, Mom and Dad were waiting for me. My sister Olivia was there, too. We all stayed in the fallout shelter for months before coming out.”
“What happened next? How did they kidnap you?”
“We had only been out of the shelter for two days. Three tops. We were outside looking for signs that that the aliens were either still here, or gone. They attacked—they killed both my parents when they tried to defend Olivia and me.”
“Where’s Olivia?” I asked. Had they killed her, too?
Tears turned Clara’s eyes glossy. “I don’t know. They took her somewhere different and I never saw her again.”
Silence settled over the room. Before I could form an idea about what happened to Olivia, I pushed it away. I couldn’t think. Couldn’t imagine what might have happened to her.
“I’m hungry!” Susan announced.
“Me, too,” Clara chimed in, the happy, cheerful Clara. Obviously, she tamped down her sadness, hid it in a box.
I didn’t know what to do. After breakfast that morning, Nikkul showed up at Susan’s room with Jane and Clara. He and Kavvan left, saying they needed to prepare for… something. I’m not sure. They just had to work. Later, someone named Padda showed up and brought us to that lounge.
“Shouldn’t we wait for someone to come and get us?”
I didn’t know how safe it was to wonder around a space ship.
Susan smirked. “Come on, Amanda. There’s four of us. I think we’re safe.”
I glanced at Jane and saw the nervousness written on her face, but she didn’t offer a yay nor nay.
“Fine. Let’s go.”
Kavvan
When Nikkul showed up with Clara and Jane in tow, I regretfully got to my feet. First meal had ended, and instead of sitting with Amanda and Susan, I had work to do. I couldn’t stop myself, nor did I want to. I pulled Amanda into my arms, and as my nose skimmed her ear, I whispered, “I’ll see you soon. I could feel her resolve disappear and smell her desire. My shaft hardened. My breathing quickened. I felt my fangs descend. I closed my eyes and tamped down on my desire. The injection should last a standard week, but I needed another one, and it had been only a standard day.
Gathering every ounce of willpower I possessed, I let go of Amanda and took a step back.
Nikkul kissed Jane before the two of us headed out. Work needed to be done.
Standing on the bridge with my arms crossed, I looked at everyone sitting at their assigned stations. Everyone knew their jobs and did them without being told. Loyal.
“Padda, how long until we arrive home?”
“Commander, at the current speed, we will arrive in four standard hours.”
I nodded. The detour to meet the Galatin took a little longer. Staring at the large view screen, I asked, “Any issues?”
“No, Commander. We have detected no threat.”
“Very well. I will be in my ready room.” I had reports that needed to be finished.
“Yes, Commander.”
~~~~
Standard hours later, I dropped the holo-pad onto the desk with a clang and rubbed my tired eyes. The rumble of my stomach let me know just how long I’d been working on the reports. “Sish! I didn’t take the females any food.” Grabbing the comm unit, I summoned Nikkul to my ready room.
“Yes, Commander?”
“Did you or Padda take any food to the females?” I watched as realization hit him. He clenched his jaw and shook his head. “Let’s go.”
Kavvan (The Azziarin Series Book 7) Page 9