Emmie bit down on her tongue so she wouldn’t cry. With Nick’s hand on her elbow she managed to turn around and walk back to the truck.
“Thanks for not crying, Emmie. I would have caved in if you’d started to bawl. Christ, did you see the look on her face? You’re a woman, what the hell was that?”
“Disbelief. Hatred that we’re going to your dad’s friends. What’s that picture in the back?”
“That’s Miss Priceless. I’ll tell you all about her later. Smitty saw me carrying it out. Don’t look back, Emmie. Now you can cry. We’re on the highway.”
“I’m not going to cry, Nick.”
“Attagirl.”
3
Nealy reached out to grab hold of the gated door to Misty Blue’s stall to steady herself. Ruby ran to her. “Did . . . did you hear, Ruby?”
“Yes. I wasn’t eavesdropping. Voices carry in the barn. I’m so sorry, Nealy. Look, it’s never too late to say you’re sorry. Go after them. They’re your children. You can’t let them go in anger.”
Nealy made no move to go after her children. Instead, she stared at the truck until it was out of sight. “They’re really leaving,” she said, giving a voice to her thoughts.
“You told Nick to pack his bags. You fired Emmie. Did you really think either one of them would come crawling back? Your blood runs in their veins. You put it to the test. Willow tried to make it right, but you booted her ass out of here so fast her head must have been spinning.”
“You’re saying I’m wrong,” Nealy said, rubbing her cheek against the mare’s head. Misty Blue snorted with pleasure. Nealy’s hand automatically went to her pocket for a mint. “He got married, Ruby. My son, my only son, didn’t think enough of me to tell me. That’s unforgivable in my book.” There were other things she wanted to say, but she didn’t trust herself to voice them aloud.
A look of weary patience settled on Ruby’s face. “Nealy. The boy is young. He’s in love. Probably for the first time in his life. He made a mistake in your eyes. Everyone makes mistakes. That’s how you learn and grow and turn into the person you’re meant to be. Up to this point, Blue Diamond Farms and you have been his whole life. When does he get a turn? When you say so? Life isn’t like that, Nealy. And Emmie is going to have a baby. You’ll be a grandmother! How can you give that up? Two words, Nealy. That’s all it will take to bring them back. Say them. Now, before it’s too late.”
“No, I won’t do that. Besides, it’s too late.”
“You don’t know that for certain. You can’t know that unless you try,” Ruby pleaded.
“I do know that, Ruby. They’re my children. I could shout those words from the rooftop, and they’d say, ‘Too late, Mom.’ Nick’s never forgiven me for his father’s death. He never said the words, but I knew. He idolized his father, and Hunt wanted him to go to college, get a degree so he could make his own choices. I put every obstacle in his path so he wouldn’t do that. He belongs here, with the horses. He has it, Ruby. He’s got the touch.”
Sudden anger sparked in Ruby’s eyes. “Guess what, Nealy! The boy doesn’t want the touch. From everything you’ve shared with me about Nick and now his own actions, it appears the boy wants what his father wanted for him, an education and a career in law. It doesn’t matter if he has the touch or not. It’s not what he wants.”
Nealy ignored Ruby. “He just thinks that’s what he wants,” she returned doggedly. “The truth is he’s been bamboozled by those Midas-touching bastards in Santa Fe. They tried every trick in the book to get Hunt into the firm and when that didn’t work, did they give up? No, they never give up. Now they have my son. It was one of the biggest sore points between Hunt and me. He was going to go. He made the decision the year he died. I never told anyone because I didn’t think he’d go through with it. Nick might have known. He could have heard us fighting over it. He never said a word, but I think he knew. For months now I think he was just looking for an excuse to leave here. He didn’t have the guts just to come out and tell me. He chose this way. It doesn’t matter now. He got what he wanted.”
“And Emmie? What about her?”
Nealy smiled as she stroked the foal. “A break from me and the farm will be the best thing that ever happened to her,” she said for lack of a more reasonable explanation. “I don’t know if you know it or not, but Emmie has never been alone. Not even for a second. She doesn’t know what it is to live outside the farm. First it was me, Maud, Jess, and then Buddy, but their marriage went sour.
“Things like that happen sometimes. It happened to Hunt and me. I think it happened to Emmie because she was finally coming into her own and Buddy couldn’t handle the normalcy of it when she was finally able to speak again. There was trouble in the marriage a year ago. I saw it, and so did Smitty. Even Nick commented on it.” Nealy moved out of the stall into the breezeway. “Emmie will make a wonderful mother. The minute she stands on those independent legs of hers it will be look out world, here I come!”
Ruby’s eyes narrowed with suspicion. “Nealy Coleman Diamond Clay, look at me. Dammit, you set them up, didn’t you? This was all a big brouhaha so they’d leave just to save face. Damn, you did it on purpose! What an actress you are. You almost had me fooled with that routine you just went through.” Ruby slapped at her forehead as she headed for the wrought-iron bench on the other side of the breezeway. “There was a moment there, Nealy, when I wanted to shake the living daylights out of you.”
Nealy smiled, relieved that Ruby now knew the truth. “I did, Ruby. It almost killed me, but I did it. I didn’t think you would catch on so quick. If I hadn’t done it this way, neither one of them would have gone. They never thought they had choices before, and that’s my fault. They’re like me in a lot of ways, but Nick is like his father. Emmie wants to be Emmie, but she thinks she has to be like me. This is the only way they’re going to be who they should be. I just want whatever makes them happy. Don’t for one minute think this isn’t killing me. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.” She leaned against the door, her face a mask of misery.
Ruby pressed her back against the wall and stared at Nealy. “I don’t understand. Why did you have to drive them away? Why couldn’t you have just said they were free to go?”
“Because they wouldn’t have gone. They wouldn’t have gone. I know that in my heart. I did what I thought was best, and there’s no turning back.”
“Why do you hate Hunt’s old friends?”
“I don’t hate them. I don’t much care for them. One of them hatched a duck egg between his legs and called the chick Miss Priceless. After that, they called him Hatch. Hunt thought that was the greatest thing in the world. The bunch of them are mega, mega, mega millionaires. They work for all the casinos in Vegas, Atlantic City, and all those Indian casinos, then give most of the money away. Hunt was in awe of that. I guess I was jealous of their lives, how successful they all became and how they kept after Hunt to join them. They stayed friends all these years. After Hunt’s death, Hatch called Nick at least once a month. The year Hunt died, Hatch’s wife was killed in a car accident. Nick went to Santa Fe and stayed for six weeks. When he got back, he called Hatch two or three times a day. That’s the kind of friendship they all had. There was no room in that world for me, and I guess I resented it. What I didn’t count on was Willow leaving Nick because of me. I’ll have to make that right somehow.”
“You’re okay with all of this then?”
“No, not really, but I can live with it. Keep your eye on the foal. I’m going to take Flyby out to the stallion cemetery. I need some Nealy time with Maud and Jess. By the way, what do you think it would take to get you and Metaxas to sign on with me for a while? We’re going to need all the help we can get with Nick and Emmie gone. I was even thinking of asking Ken to join up.”
Metaxas and Ruby had introduced Nealy to Kendrick Bell the day she won the last leg of the Triple Crown, hoping she’d fall in love with him. It hadn’t happened. Ken was a friend, nothing more. She’d
gone to his home in the Watchung Mountains in New Jersey for the holidays trying to see if there was a possibility of a relationship developing. Recovering from a triple bypass, Ken sat glued to his chair, afraid to move, afraid to do anything but vegetate. She’d tried and done everything she could think of to shake him out of his fear, a fear his doctors were concerned about. Nothing worked. Simply put, Ken was afraid to live. She’d returned home, disappointed and saddened that a man like Ken would sit around doing nothing for the rest of his life.
“Dover Wilkie is a really good guy and a great farm manager,” Nealy went on, as if talking to herself. “We were lucky to find him after Nick’s grandfather retired. Nick taught him everything. He’s so good with the horses I rest easy when he’s around them. Dover is the main reason I agreed to the Christmas vacation. Still, he’s just one person.”
“A kiss on the cheek will probably do it for Metaxas, and off the top of my head, I’d say a full-blown kiss on the lips for Ken would seal the deal. That’s only if you’re interested. Go on, I’ll keep my eye on this baby. It’s okay for me to tie a red ribbon around his neck, isn’t it? Metaxas likes his gifts wrapped. I cannot wait to see his face.”
“I can’t wait to see his face, too, and no, you cannot tie a red ribbon around his neck,” Nealy said, leading Flyby out of his stall. “Misty Blue would eat it. I won’t be long.”
“Take all the time you need,” Ruby said. “I’m just going to sit here and look at this beautiful baby.”
Nealy led Flyby outside to the mounting block. With the ease of an experienced horsewoman, she mounted his bare back and, using only his mane to guide him, trotted him out to the stallion cemetery and the little cemetery next to it. Instinctively, the big horse came to a halt in front of Maud’s and Jess’s graves. As always, Nealy could only shake her head and marvel at his intelligence and intuitiveness.
The minute Nealy slid from his back he turned around and headed toward his sire’s grave. Nealy watched as he pawed the ground and reared back, snorting and puffing loudly. His duty done, he waited patiently for his owner.
Nealy shivered inside her warm jacket as she hunched her shoulders for added warmth. “This is rough, Maud,” she said, her eyes on Hunt’s gravestone. “I feel like I’m going to collapse. I’m trying to do the right thing here. Maybe it’s too late. Maybe I should have done it sooner but . . . I just couldn’t make myself do it. The circumstances were just right this time, so I had no excuses. My mind tells me they’re going to be fine. They’re both hard workers, not a lazy bone in their bodies. They care about the animals and people. They’re financially secure. My heart just feels bruised and battered right now. I made a mess of it, didn’t I, Maud?” Nealy looked around, then cast her gaze upward as though looking for a sign. When none was forthcoming, she sighed.
“I guess that means I have to do the best I can under the circumstances. What will be, will be.” She whistled softly for Flyby, who trotted over to her. “Did you have a nice visit, big boy?” Flyby gently nosed her shoulder until she stroked his big head. “I hope I can handle all of this. It’s going to be strange around here for a while without Nick and Emmie. I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to it. You know what, Flyby, I’m going to sit here on this bench for a few minutes. I need to do some hard thinking.” Her legs stretched out in front of her, Nealy leaned back on the iron bench.
“It’s too cold out here, Nealy. You’re going to fall asleep. Go up to the house and take a nap. Nothing’s going to happen.”
“Hunt. Gee, I haven’t heard from you in years. You’re angry with me, aren’t you?”
“No. I admire you for what you just did. It took guts. You always had a bushelful of those. I’m glad you finally let them go. I’m real proud of you.”
“Really, Hunt. You sound different. Are you finally happy? We got married for all the wrong reasons. I’m sorry about a lot of things. How about you?”
“The past is prologue, Nealy. Only the present counts for you. You’ll be okay. I just wanted to thank you for letting him go. I know it was hard.”
“I wish you were here, Hunt. I really do. I learned so much since you . . . you went away. If I only knew then what I know now.”
“Don’t do that to yourself, Nealy. Life will go on. Life, Nealy. Live your life. Be happy. All I ever wanted for you was to be happy. I wanted the same thing for Nick. It seemed there was never enough time to be happy. All our time was spent with the horses until there was nothing left for anyone else. It’s getting colder, Nealy, and the wind is whipping up. Take Flyby back to his stall. By the way, that foal is a beauty. I’m going to keep my eye on him.”
Nealy opened her eyes and smiled as Flyby nudged her shoulder. “Yeah, I know it’s cold. I was just resting my eyes a little. I think I’ll walk you back and let the wind whip me along. I had a dream. Actually, it was kind of nice. I haven’t dreamed of Hunt in years. I wonder if it means something.”
Nealy turned for a last look at the cemetery. For one tiny second she thought she saw a vision of Maud pointing to Hunt’s gravestone. She blinked, and the vision was gone. A trick of light? The wind? She was on overload, and her mind was playing tricks on her. Maybe she should go up to the house and take a nap. Better yet, she’d make a bed for herself in the barn and sleep there and let Ruby go up to the house and get some rest.
Dover Wilkie rubbed at his stubble of beard as he stared at Nealy, who was sound asleep in the stall next to Misty Blue’s. He hated to wake her, but she’d told him she was expecting an important phone call, and he had no way of knowing if the call that had just come through was the important one or not. “Nealy, wake up, you have a phone call. No one else is here to take it. Ruby is up at the house. Do you want me to tell them to call back or tell them to hold on?”
“No, that’s okay, Dover. I’ll take it. I just need a minute.” She looked down at her watch and blinked. She’d slept for four hours. She felt more tired now than when she’d curled into a ball and closed her eyes. “I must have tired blood or something,” she muttered.
“No real sleep in four days will do that to you,” the burly farm manager muttered in return.
Nealy picked up the phone in the tack room. “This is Nealy Clay.”
“Nealy, it’s Ken. I’m returning your call.”
“Ken. Thanks for calling me back. How are you? How are the dogs? Do you miss me? Do the dogs miss me?”
“You bet. What’s happening?”
“Misty Blue dropped her foal. It was touch-and-go there for a little while, but everything is fine now. I had to fire Nick and Emmie.” She followed up with a brief explanation. “Metaxas is due any minute now. Ruby is so happy. There just aren’t any words to tell you how far she’s come. She looks great, says she feels great, and her world is right side up.”
“You fired your own kids! Why, Nealy?”
Was that condemnation she was hearing in Ken’s voice? Hunt had used the same tone of voice with her whenever he disapproved of something she’d done or said. She could feel herself start to bristle. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Ruby entering the barn. She mouthed the words It’s Ken. “Because they deserved to be fired. They broke the rules.”
“Don’t you believe in second chances, Nealy?”
“Sometimes. This wasn’t one of those times.”
“I guess that’s your way of telling me it’s none of my business.”
“I didn’t mean it like that. I called you for a reason, Ken. I was wondering if you would mind coming to Kentucky and signing on for a brief spell to help out a little. We’ve had a few emergencies and are shorthanded. I wouldn’t expect you to do anything really strenuous.”
“Well . . . I . . .”
“I’ll take that as a no,” Nealy said coolly. “Thanks for returning my call.”
“Nealy, wait. Don’t hang up. You caught me by surprise. It’s not that I don’t want to go to Kentucky. I . . . we talked about this, Nealy.”
“Right. You’re afraid if you ra
ise your arms, you’re going to drop dead. You’re afraid to have sex because you think you might die in the act. You’re afraid to go for a walk because you think you’ll keel over. Never mind that your heart specialist warned you that inactivity will do you more harm. Right now, right this minute, I’m thinking you are a wuss, and that’s one thing I do not need. All four of your doctors said you were fit, Ken. They said you were in better shape than some thirty-year-olds. I don’t know why I’m even talking about this. I have things to do, so I’m going to hang up. Before I do that, though, I’d like to make a suggestion. Go talk to a shrink. Bye, Ken.”
“My God, Nealy, what the hell was that all about?” Ruby demanded. “You’re like a runaway bulldozer. What did he say?”
“It’s what he didn’t say. You heard my end. He didn’t say anything. He’s afraid to live, Ruby. All he does is move from one chair to the other. He gets up, he sits down. He goes to the bathroom. He brings in the mail and the newspaper. Those are his activities. The day before I left to come home from my visit up there, he hired a car service to drive him into the city to his doctor’s appointments. I went with him. By the way, there are four of them. They all told him the same thing. They also suggested a shrink. He just stood there looking sheepish and shrugging his shoulders. One of the doctors finally said, ‘You aren’t going to follow our advice, are you, Mr. Bell?’ Do you know what Ken’s response was? ‘Probably not, Dr. Quinn.’ End of quote. His mother called a dozen times while I was there. She kept asking him if he was getting out and doing things. He lied to her and said yes just to get her off the phone. I don’t have time for nonsense like that. If he wants to sit on two dozen different chairs a day and die from boredom, don’t expect me to help him along. I’d be an accessory to his eventual death. He doesn’t even cook. How hard or strenuous is cooking? He orders all his food prepared and delivered. I have a farm to run and horses to see to. Maybe Metaxas can get through to him because I sure couldn’t.”
Kentucky Heat Page 6